Disclaimer: All the usual "me no own, you no sue" rules apply. "Romeo and Juliet" is performed by the Indigo Girls. Aerosmith owns "Fly Away from Here."
Rating: PG-13 (Did you know that the PG-13 rating was invented for the movie Raiders of the Lost Ark? Just thought I’d share…)
Summary: Rogue finally pushes Gambit too far...
Author’s Note: Again, I am ignoring most of what is considered to be "canon." I tried to make Rogue and Gambit’s relationship fit in with the comic books as best I could, but I don’t think it’s even humanly possible to keep up with all their break-ups and make-ups.
Feedback and Archiving: Please and please. :-) Send all praise and constructive criticism to addie_logan@yahoo.com. Send all flames to someone who cares.
A
Thousand Lost Forevers
By:
Addie Logan
"I can’t replace all the wasted days The memory of your face—can’t help thinkin’ Maybe if we ever coulda kept it all together Where would we be A thousand lost forevers And the promises you were giving me."
--Matchbox 20 "Last Beautiful Girl"
"I’m t’rough wit’ dis, Rogue! I can’t go on never knowin’ if today’s gonna be a day dat you wake up feelin’ like maybe you love me or a day where I get ta be your personal punchin’ bag! Remy can only take so much, Chére!"
"You think this is easy for me? You think I like feelin’ this way about a man who’s only in it for the chase?"
"Don’t even start dat Rogue! If dat was de case I woulda started chasin’ after someone else ages ago!"
"How do I know you’re not?"
"I have ta listen ta you accusin’ me of havin’ an affair now? Weren’t we havin’ a good conversation jus’ a minute ago? Merde, I can’t put up wit’ your mood swings anymore!"
"Well, maybe I can’t put up with your fickleness anymore!"
"Fickleness? You sayin’ I’m fickle? Dis comin’ from a woman who tell Remy she love him one day an’ de next day she leave him ta freeze in Antarctica!"
"You still dwellin’ on that?!"
"How could I not? I almost died!"
"Well you’re alive, ain’t ya?"
"Dat’s it. I’m outta here an’ I ain’t comin’ back. Ever."
"Good, Swamp Rat! I don’t want ya around! I’m better off with out ya!"
Gambit stormed out of the mansion, slamming the door behind him.
Rogue stood there with her arms crossed and her back turned to the last spot where Remy had stood. She knew he’d come back. No matter how angry he got, he always came back to her…
*** *** ***
Three Years Later…It had been two years since Remy had really sat down and thought of her. He’d had the occasional memory, of course—a vision of things long since past brought on by a woman’s green eyes or the sound of a Mississippi accent, but he hadn’t really thought about her, not the way he was in that moment, at least. He recalled her perfect face in his mind and he physically ached. Remy knew now that that tangible longing was something that he was never going to rid himself of.
Not that he hadn’t tried. Remy had tried everything he knew to make himself finally get past the near-addiction he felt for the woman who called herself Rogue. Sometimes he’d tried to forget her by finding solitude in the arms of another woman. Other times, he’d sat alone, reminding himself of all the pain she’d caused him, how she tended to be as cold as that barren wasteland she’d left him in so many years ago. For a while, it had worked. He’d moved on with his life, remembering how to live without the X-Men, without Rogue.
Remy enjoyed living by himself, for himself. Away from the mansion, he could put the pain and guilt of his past behind him. Without Rogue, he no longer felt the constant need for a self-imposed penance. He could again be the charming, rebellious Remy LeBeau that he’d been in his days before he’d fallen in love with her. He moved from place to place, never getting too close to anyone, never having a care in the world. He was free.
He was happy.
Then it happened. He dreamt about her, the last time he’d seen her. He dreamt in black in white.
He’d told Rogue he was leaving for good, but he knew she didn’t believe him. She’d had no reason to. He hadn’t meant it. He’d been gone for only a few days before he came back, the masochistic urge to love her calling him home to Westchester.
In both reality and illusion, he’d come back to find her sitting on the edge of her bed, crying. Her tears usually forced him to go to her, to hold her until she stopped hurting, even if he needed to be comforted himself. Only this time, her tears made him feel contempt, not pity. He frowned, promising himself that she would not manipulate her way back into his heart yet again. He’d turned away, and for three years, he hadn’t looked back. She’d never known he was even there.
In his dream, it didn’t happen that way. In his dream, he’d watched her longer, staring at the colorless figure of the woman he’d once loved so completely. She’d turned around to look at him, and the immaculateness of the black and white had been destroyed by the bright green of her eyes. The pain in those eyes had brought Remy back to the harsh reality of his unlit hotel room.
Now he sat alone in the dark, remembering the woman he’d sworn to forget. He’d hated her when he’d seen her crying alone, all the times she’d used her tears to lure him back into her arms rushing to the surface. He wondered if this time, her pain had been genuine, like the one he felt now, starting in his chest and creeping to fill his whole body.
Remy let himself remember Rogue. He went beyond the bad memories he’d used to create a shield of pain that would protect him from yearning. Instead he called to mind the better times, times when he didn’t realize she was capable of causing him such heartache. Times when he hadn’t yet learned to face the truth.
Remy let himself remember Rogue, and he missed her. The missing hurt worse than anything he’d ever known. For the first time since he’d left, Remy realized that Rogue was really no longer a part of his life, and that caused him more pain than he’d ever expected. His whole world suddenly became as devoid of color as his dream, the only spark of life those two spots of green that danced in his mind.
Remy remembered Rogue, the way she had cried, and for the first time, he allowed himself to cry along with her.
*** *** ***
It was the perfect setting for a romantic dinner. Only problem was it was a French restaurant, and they tended to make Rogue nostalgic.
However, though this may have been the place to think about Remy, Rogue knew it was not the time. She’d long since given up on the notion that he would ever come back, and she knew she had to move on. It had been three years. So much had happened, so much had changed.
"Miss me, Darling?" asked a tall, dark-haired man as he sat down across from Rogue.
Rogue pushed all thoughts of Gambit out of her mind with a false smile. "Longest five minutes of my life."
The tint of sarcasm in her words was missed as he reached across the table to take her hand. "I don’t know why you still insist on wearing gloves," he said. "After all, I did help you get over your little problem."
Rogue winced at his reference to her powers and had to remind herself that he didn’t mean to sound condescending. It was just his way. "I know, Zander," she said. "I’m just used to wearin’ them, I guess."
"They’re like a safety blanket to you," Zander said. "You wear them because you don’t trust your powers or yourself."
Rogue looked down at her covered hands, feeling ashamed. "I know."
Zander slipped off her gloves. "You have such beautiful hands. You really should show them." He raised her bare hand to his lips. "See, beautiful," he murmured.
Rogue couldn’t help but blush.
"You know I love you, don’t you?" Zander asked.
Rogue stared into his perfect blue eyes. All she could manage in response was a nod and an "uh-hu."
"And you love me?"
Another nod.
"Well then I love you and you love me, and we’ve been together for about a year now, and well…"
Rogue raised an eyebrow. She didn’t think she’d ever seen Dr. Zander Hayes at a loss for words before. "What are ya tryin’ to say, Sugah?" she asked.
Zander took a deep breath and pulled a small black box out of his pocket. He regained his usual self-confidence as he popped it open. "Rogue, will you marry me?"
Now it was Rogue’s turn to be speechless. She stared at the ring, exorbitant and heavy in its dark, soft case. "Zander, I…I don’t know what to say."
"I was hoping you’d say yes."
Rogue felt backed into a corner as she struggled to weigh the decision. "I need time to think," she said finally.
Zander gave her a smile of obvious disappointment. "I understand," he said. Rogue tried to nudge the box back towards him, but he clasped it firmly in her hand. "Keep it. You don’t have to wear it, I just want you to hold on to it for now."
Rogue nodded and took the ring.
*** *** ***
Later that night as she sat alone in her room back at the mansion, Rogue contemplated Zander’s proposal. She knew she loved him and should be overjoyed by the prospect of marrying him, but something just wasn’t sitting with her right about the whole thing.
She picked up the ring box and looked inside. It was the most beautiful diamond she had ever seen, and Rogue wondered why she couldn’t bring herself to put it on. She knew Zander would make the perfect husband.
Zander had changed her life in so many ways. He’d helped her finally learn to control her powers and then in the ensuing courtship he’d swept her off her feet. He was a respected psychiatrist in the mutant community, and Rogue had always enjoyed being the girl on his arm. She cared about him and was more than happy in the relationship they had shared over the past year.
But marriage?
"Aren’t things good they way they are?" Rogue wondered out loud.
Rogue took her shoes off and reached up on top of her closet shelf to get their box down. She knocked over a pile of old pictures in the process and looked down to see a two-dimensional likeness of Remy LeBeau staring up at her. Rogue knew where her doubts about Zander were coming from now.
Gambit.
*** *** ***
"Jean, ‘Ro, can I talk to y’all?" Rogue asked as she walked into the kitchen the next morning.
"Of course!" Jean said as a chair slid out from the table, seemingly by itself. "Have a seat."
Rogue sat. "Zander asked me to marry him," she said without preamble.
"Why that is wonderful!" Storm exclaimed.
"Congratulations," Jean said with a smile.
"I haven’t said yes yet," Rogue said.
The other women looked at her in surprise. "What did you tell him then?" Storm asked.
"I told him I needed some time to think."
"Why?" Storm asked. "Your relationship seemed to be going so well. I believed you wanted to marry him."
"It is, and I guess I do," Rogue said. "It’s just that when he asked me, I knew I couldn’t say yes right then."
"You have reservations?" Storm asked.
Rogue nodded.
"Is it Gambit?" Jean asked.
Rogue sighed. "Yes and no. It ain’t that I still love Remy and am waitin’ for him to come back or anything like that. I gave up on that little fantasy a long time ago. It’s just that, well, we never really resolved everything."
"So you feel like you can’t move on with Zander until you’ve had some sort of closure with Remy?" asked Jean.
Rogue nodded again, thinking how much that sounded exactly like something Zander would say.
"We could try to get in touch with Remy if you would like," Storm said. "I’m sure Cerebro could locate him."
"No," Rogue said. "I can’t find him after three years of bein’ apart just so I can ask him to help me feel better about marryin’ someone else."
Jean reached over and laid her hand on Rogue’s arm. "I know you’re confused right now," she said. "Marriage is a huge step. I said no the first time Scott asked me." Jean patted Rogue’s arm before moving back. "Doubts are natural. They don’t necessarily mean you shouldn’t say yes."
Storm smiled at Rogue warmly. "You should listen to you heart," she told her.
Rogue could tell Storm felt that her heart was telling her to marry Zander.
"Thanks, y’all," Rogue said, standing up. "I’m gonna go back up to my room for a little while and think."
"Rogue," Jean called out as she started to walk away. "I’m sure Gambit doesn’t hold a grudge against you."
Rogue gave Jean a weak smile then left the room.
*** *** ***
Gambit sat in his hotel room, staring at the wall. In his mind, old movies of the life he’d known back at the X-Mansion played on a continual loop. For the first time since he’d left, he ignored the bad and let himself remember the good.
He could admit to himself then that he missed her. The black and white image of her was so clear in his mind that he was almost desperate to find her and put her in color.
Gambit looked up and squinted his eyes, realizing that the sun was glaring at him from the sky. He couldn’t remember when it had stopped being night.
He shut the curtains, making it mostly dark in the room again.
Without giving it another thought, Remy grabbed a bag from his closet and began haphazardly throwing his various belongings inside. He was checked in for another week at least, but he didn’t care. He knew it was time to leave.
It wasn’t too long until Gambit was back on his motorcycle beginning the trek from Louisiana to New York.
*** *** ***
Rogue stared at the open box and the ring that lay inside. She got up, placed the box, still open, on her desk, and then walked back to her bed. She stared at the ring from across the room. A ray of sunlight came in from the window and the diamond sparkled. Rogue got up again, closed the box, then sat back down.
She stared at the box, remembering events of two years ago. She’d heard about a psychiatrist who had helped mutants gain power over abilities that had previously seemed to be uncontrollable. Rogue had gone to him, hoping that maybe—finally—she could find the means to living a normal life…
*** *** ***
"Dr. Hayes?" Rogue peeked nervously into the office.
Dr. Zander Hayes gave her a warm smile. "Ah, you must be Rogue. Come in and have a seat." He pointed to a chair in front of his desk.
Rogue sat down in the indicated chair, noting that things were not quite as she had expected them to be. She’d figured that she’d be told by some old, balding man to lie down on a couch and pour her heart out, but that wasn’t the case at all. Instead, she was sitting in a chair across from a rather attractive man who didn’t appear to be much older than she was herself.
"So, Rogue, you have trouble controlling your mutation," Dr. Hayes said.
"Yes."
"What is the nature of your powers?"
"Whenever my skin touches another person’s, I absorb them, and they fall into a coma."
"You ‘absorb’ them?"
"Yeah. See, their memories, personality, knowledge—mutant powers if they’ve got ‘em—go into my mind."
"Do you retain these in your mind permanently?"
"Pretty much. Their powers go away after a while, as long as I didn’t touch them too long. And the people wake from their comas, although the time they spend in ‘em varies, dependin’ on how long we touched. But they’re still floatin’ around in my head. I have control over their influence on me for the most part now, though."
"So you just need help controlling your powers, not necessarily dealing with their long term effects?"
Rogue shrugged. "I guess."
Dr. Hayes smiled at her. "I promise you, I will do everything I can to make all your dreams come true."
His smile made Rogue blush.
*** *** ***
Rogue was the doctor’s hardest case to date. He’d worked with her almost everyday for three months straight, and she was beginning to get frustrated.
"I can’t do it, Dr. Hayes!" Rogue exclaimed. "It’s hopeless! I’m hopeless!"
"Yes, you can. You only think you can’t. We’ve made progress."
Rogue sighed and slumped in her chair. "Only when you’ve been in my mind, holdin’ my powers back."
"Rogue, I know you’re capable of controlling your abilities. I’ve spent more time with you than I ever have with any of my other patients, and I’ve never been one to waste any effort on a lost cause. If you learning control was impossible, you wouldn’t be here anymore."
"I think you’re overestimatin’ me, Doc."
"No, you’re underestimating yourself." He reached out and took hold of one of her hands. "Listen, I know you have the ability inside of you. I’ve felt it, Rogue. It’s just that you’ve been unable to touch for so long that that condition has become comfortable."
"Comfortable?" Rogue pulled away from him. "Comfortable?! How is not bein’ able to touch anyone, bein’ cut off from human contact comfortable?"
Dr. Hayes sighed. "I didn’t mean ‘comfortable’ as in something you like, I just meant it’s what you’re used to and you’re afraid of change."
"I am not! I wanna change!"
Dr. Hayes looked her straight in the eyes. "Then do it."
Rogue started to slip off her glove, but quickly stopped. "I..I can’t!"
Dr. Hayes sighed as he stood up. "Fine. You’re right. You are a hopeless cause. Well, it’s been nice working with you. Have a nice life."
Rogue stared up at him, dumbfounded. "That’s it? You’re givin’ up on me?!"
Dr. Hayes shrugged.
"But you can’t! You’re my last hope! If you can’t help me, there’s no one left for me to turn to!"
"How can I still have faith in you when you’ve given up on yourself?"
Rogue stared up at him for a moment, doe-eyed, then her expression suddenly grew stern. She stood up and walked over to Dr. Hayes. "I haven’t given up. You say I can do it, and I believe ya."
"Then prove it," Dr. Hayes said, moving a step closed. "Touch me."
Rogue almost protested, but she decided the time had come that she take the chance. She mixed everything Dr. Hayes had taught her with unwavering determination and reached out to lay her bare fingers on his cheek. She heard the doctor’s breath catch, but he stayed conscious. Rogue felt nothing in her mind but her own thoughts, then a feeling of overwhelming joy. She had done it. After so many years, she could control her powers.
Tears began to gently roll down her cheeks. Dr. Hayes reached up and wiped one away, the feel of his skin against hers causing Rogue to shiver. "See," he said, his voice warm and soothing, "I told you you could do it."
"Thank ya," Rogue said, her words choked with emotion. "You’ve given me what I’ve always wanted."
Dr. Hayes stared down into her big, green eyes. His throat became dry, his legs week, and he felt as if his body had a mind of its own. He leaned down and kissed her.
It was that day that, to Rogue, Dr. Hayes became "Zander," and she stopped being a paying customer.
*** *** ***
Now, two years later, Rogue sat alone, trying to piece together the jumbled mess her thoughts had become. Zander had worked so hard with her, first to help her learn not to fear touching other people in order to find the key to controlling her powers, then to mend the broken heart Remy LeBeau had left her with, showing her how to love again.
Now he wanted to make her his wife, and she couldn’t even bring herself to look at the ring, never mind put it on. That made her feel guilty. Zander loved her—she loved him—and yet, she couldn’t do something that should’ve been so easy, natural even.
She got up and walked over to her closet, glancing at herself in the full-length mirror. Her legs and arms were bare. She wasn’t wearing gloves. Zander had made that possible. He had granted her greatest wish.
The telephone rang, making Rogue jump. She walked over to answer it, but stopped, her hand resting lightly on the receiver. She knew it was Zander and she just couldn’t bring herself to talk to him then. What would she say? That she loved him, but a lack of closure with a former lover prevented her from a commitment as strong as marriage? What would he say to that? Would he understand? Would be angry and tell her that was fine, because he was going to leave her now anyway. Would he try to tell her that this was merely a manifestation of the pain she felt over Gambit’s departure and her fear that she would drive away anyone else who ever loved her?
Rogue decided on the latter and knew she didn’t want to hear it right then. She was confused, and Zander’s psychobabble wouldn’t help that one bit.
So Rogue lay down on the bed, waited for the ringing to stop, then cried herself to sleep.
*** *** ***
Another dive of a diner. Remy had been eating at one after another of those ever since he’d started his journey from Louisiana back to Westchester. If he’d been able to he wouldn’t have stopped at all, but he knew that was impossible.
Still, every moment he spent off his motorcycle was another moment he wasted getting back to Rogue.
He waited impatiently for the waitress to bring him his order. Under normal circumstances, he would’ve flirted with her—she had made it obvious that she would be more than just a little receptive to such attention, and she was definitely attractive—but the only woman he wanted to talk to was Rogue. Anyone else would just slow him down.
Gambit didn’t know what exactly had given him such a sense of urgency. He hadn’t seen Rogue in three years—what were a few more days? And what had brought on his desire to see her anyway? Until recently, he hadn’t even cared.
But rhyme and reason no longer mattered to Gambit. All he knew was he needed to get back to New York—back to Rogue—and he was going to get there as fast as he could. He’d figure out where to go from there when the time came.
Remy frowned. What would he do when he got back? Would there be anything left of the pseudo-relationship he’d once shared with Rogue? Did he even want there to be? Would he see her again and realize that he still loved her, or would he learn that there had never really been anything there to begin with?
Before Remy could ponder the future any longer, his food arrived. The waitress gave him a dazzling smile, accompanied with her batting eyelashes, but Remy only gave her a curt nod in return. He began to eat almost mechanically and the waitress left pouting.
Gambit’s mind was focused on Rogue and the road ahead as he ate, and his thoughts only wavered when he stood up to leave and caught sight of the waitress, watching him. He noticed the disappointment in her eyes and left her a large tip, hoping maybe that would do away with some of it.
It wasn’t long before Remy was again speeding down the interstate towards Rogue and whatever destiny she may have held for him.
*** *** ***
Rogue woke the next morning feeling somewhat foolish for refusing to answer the phone the night before when Zander called, as well as for her subsequent tears. What was she so afraid of? She had spoken to Zander a million times before, and she knew that he would never make her feel bad for her uncertain emotions.
And Remy… Rogue sighed at the thought of the man she had once loved. Remy. She knew he would never come back to her after the way she’d treated him in the past. Jean had told Rogue that she was sure Gambit didn’t hold a grudge, but Rogue disagreed. How could he not hate her for all that she had done to him? He had loved her so completely—even with her powers creating a barrier between them. He had accepted every part of her, and she had never done the same for him in return. He had given her his heart, and she had only given him scorn and mistrust. Rogue knew that she did not deserve forgiveness and that Remy would never give it to her.
After all, she never would’ve forgiven him if it had been reversed.
Rogue looked over at the telephone and sighed. She knew she couldn’t exactly hide from Zander. Besides, refusing to answer the phone simply because she hasn’t been in the mood to talk when she knew that Zander needed to hear her voice would’ve been something she would’ve done to Remy—and Rogue had sworn that she wouldn’t make those mistakes in another relationship. She’d pushed Remy away. She wouldn’t do that to Zander.
She wouldn’t lose someone like that ever again.
Rogue picked up the phone and dialed Zander’s number from memory.
"Hello?"
"Hey, Sugah."
Zander paused for a second at the sound of her voice. "Rogue?"
"Does anyone else call ya ‘Sugah’?"
Zander laughed. "No. So why are you calling?"
"I need to talk to you."
"We are talking."
"Not over the phone. It needs to be in person."
Zander didn’t say anything but Rogue could still hear him breathing.
"Zander? You still there?"
"Yeah, I’m here. Rogue, can you tell me something now?"
"I…I guess."
"Is this going to be a bad talk?"
Rogue tried to think of the best way to answer his question and decided just to respond as honestly as she could. "I don’t know. I just know I need to talk to you."
"Do you want me to come over there?"
"Yes, if you could, that would be nice."
"Just let me find my keys then and I’m out the door."
"Find your keys?" Rogue asked, her tone slightly teasing. "You mean they aren’t hangin’ by the door as always."
"I had a rough night."
Rogue felt a pang of guilt. "I’m sorry."
"It’s okay…really. I’ll be over there soon and we can talk then."
"All right. I’ll be in my room. Just get someone to let you in, then come on up."
"Okay. I love you," Zander said, hanging up before Rogue had a chance to saw anything else. She knew it was because he was afraid of how she’d respond.
Rogue hung up and looked over at the closed box on her desk. She walked over and opened it, taking the ring out and holding it in the palm of her hand.
She knew now what her answer would be.
*** *** ***
Gambit knew he would be able to make it to the mansion by the morning if he continued to travel through the night, but he just couldn't do it. His eyesight was blurring and if he didn't rest soon, he'd crash. It would be pretty hard to make it back to the mansion if he was critically injured, or worse—dead.
"Been gone dis long already," Remy thought. "What's one more night?"
So Remy LeBeau opted to spend the night in a hotel, not knowing that by the morning, everything would've changed.
*** *** ***
"Zander, I've given this a lot of thought, and well…"
Rogue looked down, and Zander felt like time was moving slower than it ever had before. He took her hands in his, gently stroking her soft skin with his thumbs. "What, Rogue. Please, just tell me what your answer is. The waiting is agony…"
"Yes," Rogue said, hardly recognizing her own voice.
Zander smiled, scooping her up into a fervent kiss. "Rogue," he said as he let her go. "You've made me the happiest man alive."
Rogue smiled. "I can tell."
"And you're happy, too—right, my darling?"
"Of course I am, Zander. We're getting married."
"We'll get started on the wedding preparations right away," Zander said. "I want to get married as soon as possible."
A chill washed over Rogue at those words. She'd agreed to marry him, yes, but she hadn't expected to jump right into things. "How soon is soon?"
"Well, I'm not sure," Zander said. "It will take time to plan a wedding. I'm sure my mother will want to help with much of the planning, and she will not allow it to be a small event by any means."
"You mother?" Rogue asked. She had not taken into account that Cordelia Hayes would want to have control over the wedding plans, but then again, she should have. The woman took an active interest in every part of her youngest son's life. Besides, he was the last of the Hayes children to get married—and Cordelia's obvious favorite.
Rogue, on the other hand, was not high on the old woman's list.
"What do you think your mother will say about the engagement, Zander? I mean, she's never seemed to take much of a liking to me. Maybe we should just elope."
"What? Rogue, love, that's nonsense. Mother likes you just fine. Besides, if we got married without her knowing she'd be heartbroken."
"Maybe it would kill 'er, and I wouldn't have to have her as a mother-in-law," Rogue thought. She smiled at Zander. "You're right. I'm sure your mother will be very happy for us."
Zander gave Rogue a gentle kiss. "Everything will be fine. Our wedding will be beautiful, and as soon as it's over, we can begin our perfect life together."
Rogue was already beginning to doubt how perfect a life with Dr. Zander Hayes would be.
*** *** ***
Home. He was home. Remy chuckled. Strange how after three years, the mansion still felt that way to him. He parked his motorcycle in the same place he always had before. Seemed like nothing had changed.
He walked up to the mansion and into the front door. The front hall still looked exactly the same.
"Remy? Oh my God, Remy is that you?"
Gambit looked up to see Jubilee come down the stairs—or at least a woman he believed was Jubilee. Her hair cascaded down her back all the way to her hips, and her features were definitely those of a woman—not a little girl. "Petite!" Remy exclaimed. "Look who's all grown up!"
Jubilee ran to him and threw her arms around him, reminding him of the girl he'd once known. She pulled back. "Geez, Rem, it's great to see you. It's been since, well, before I left for college, I guess."
"Yeah, Jubilee, it has been awhile."
"So you back for good? I sure have missed you."
"Oui, I plan t'stay," Gambit said. "Dis ol' t'iefs, been away from home long enough…"
"I'm glad. I haven't had many people to hang out with since I came back," Jubilee said. "Most of these people still treat me as a kid. Jean especially." She rolled her eyes. "But anyway, you've always treated me decently—I figure you haven't changed much."
"Nope. Still de same Gambit. You don't look much like de same Jubilee, t'ough."
Jubilee shook her head. "Nope, all grown up."
"Dat's good. Knew ya would be, 'ventually." Gambit decided it was time to ask the question that had been on the tip of his tongue since he'd walked into the mansion. "Where's Rogue."
"Oh she's upstairs with a bunch of the other women showing of her enga…" Jubilee stopped shocking. "Oh, God, Remy. I didn't even think about you not knowing."
"Not knowin' what, Petite?"
"I don't want to be the one to tell you, Remy."
"Tell me, Jubilee."
Jubilee sighed. "Rogue got engaged this morning."
"This morning? This morning. Mon Dieu…"
"I’m sorry, Gambit."
"Non, it's okay, Petite. Not like I came back here for Rogue. Got over her ages ago." Mentally, Remy was kicking himself for stopping the night before. If he'd just gotten there a little sooner. "No," he told himself. "If Rogue had already fallen in love wit' dis guy enough to marry him, den I never woulda stood a chance."
"Dat's great actually—for her," Remy said. "She's been lookin' for a man t'love her like dat for a long time."
"She can control her powers now," Jubilee said.
Gambit's mental kicks grew harder at that. Was the avoidance of sleep deprivation really worth missing his only chance to touch Rogue freely? "Really? Dat's wonderful. De femme wanted dat badly, I know. How'd she do it?"
"Zander helped her."
"Dat de guy?"
"Yeah."
"Lucky guy."
"You really over her, Remy?"
Gambit gave his most charming grin. "Of course! After t'ree years, dere's no way I'd keep holdin' on to dat torch. No point in lovin' a woman dat obviously never loved you. Dat relationship was doomed from de start. Probably better for me now dat it's really over."
Jubilee frowned, not really believing him. "Yeah…it's great you're taking this so well."
Gambit shrugged nonchalantly. "Not much bot'ers dis Cajun."
"I can tell…"
"So you people got anyt'in' t'eat in here?" Remy asked, wanting to change the subject from Rogue and her engagement. "I haven't had decent food in a while."
Jubilee laughed. "We sure do. C'mon, let's go to the kitchen and we can do some more catching up."
Remy grinned. "Dat sounds great, Petite. Jus' great."
*** *** ***
Rogue sat down beside the wall by the staircase as she heard Remy and Jubilee walk away. She'd just been on her way downstairs after letting all the X-Women fawn over the ring Zander had given her when she'd heard something that made her stop—Remy's voice. Her initial response had been to throw the oversized ring from her finger and run into Gambit's arms, begging him to forgive her for all the things she'd done to him in the past and do everything she could to prove she was worthy of yet another chance.
But that notion was tossed out of her head as soon as she heard what he'd had to say.
"No point in lovin' a woman dat obviously never loved you."
"Dat relationship was doomed from de start."
"Probably better for me now dat it's really over."
Rogue pulled her knees up to her chest as she began to cry. It really was over between her and Remy. She'd told Jean and Ororo that she'd given up her dream of Remy coming home to her someday, but that wasn't true. She'd never truly stopped waiting. Even when she'd agreed to marry Zander, she knew she'd toss away that ring in a second if Gambit came back and swept her back into his arms.
But now Gambit had come back, and it hadn't sounded much like he wanted her anywhere near him, much less his arms. Rogue cried silent tears, willing herself to banish all those feelings she had developed for the Cajun X-Man over the years. Their relationship had been volatile, but the love had been real, the passion ever-present. But what did it matter anymore? Rogue was engaged to a man that adored her and Gambit obviously could care less.
Rogue resigned herself completely to her fate as Mrs. Zander Hayes.
*** *** ***
"Remy?"
Gambit froze. That voice. Her voice. He turned around slowly and the first sight of her face in three years took his breath away. Could it be possible that she'd grown even more beautiful? "Rogue."
"You're back," Rogue said. "I didn't think you'd be coming back."
"I didn't plan on it."
"What made you then?" Rogue asked.
Gambit wanted to tell her the truth—that he suddenly hadn't been able to stay away from her any longer and he'd had to come back to her. But he couldn't do that. She was about to become somebody else's wife. He shrugged. "Don' know. Guess I'd been gone long enough."
"It's good your back." She added quickly, "The team has missed you."
Gambit frowned. "Yeah, I'll bet." He looked her over. She looked different somehow, almost more sophisticated. And her speech patterns seemed to have changed, too. Much of her trademark Southern accent had faded away. He wondered if her fiancé had anything to do with the change.
"I'm…I'm getting married," Rogue said, deciding to go ahead and get that out in the open between the two of them.
"I know," Gambit said. "Jubilee tol' me. Hope he makes ya happier den Remy ever did."
Rogue looked away from him. "Zander's a great guy."
"He takin' care of you, Chére?"
Rogue winced at the sound of him calling her "Chére." She hadn't realized how much she'd missed being called that particular term of endearment. "Yes. He's a rather successful mutant psychiatrist. Respected in the community and all that."
"Respected in the community…no wonder she'd lookin' all prim an' proper. Gotta keep up appearances when she's on the arm of her rich fiancé…" Remy thought. "Dat's real good f'you, Rogue. You deserve a man like that."
"Yeah, but I'd rather take a Cajun thief that's a little rough around the edges." "I know. I'm lucky to have him."
"When's de weddin'?"
"We haven't set a date yet, but Zander wants it to be soon. He says he doesn't want to have to wait long to make me his wife."
"I don' blame him."
Rogue could've sworn she heard a tint of regret in her voice, but she refused to acknowledge it. It was only her imagination, nothing more. "You're welcome to come to the wedding if you would like," she said.
Gambit knew the pain he felt at hearing those words had to be his heart being physically ripped from his chest. She was asking him to watch her marry another man as casually as she would ask him to pass the salt? Was she really that over him? Or maybe she'd never been that in love to begin with… Remy shrugged. "I might show up."
Rogue wanted to cry at the nonchalant way he'd responded to her invitation to her wedding. He'd really gotten over her… "It will probably be a very nice wedding," she said. "Zander's family has a lot of money."
"Guess your set f'life then, Rogue," Gambit said. "An' he doesn't sound much like de kinds man who'd have dark secrets or anyt'in' like dat, so it should work out fine 'tween you two."
Rogue's jaw dropped at Gambit's last comment. "Remy, I…"
He took her hand and gently brought it to his lips, brushing the back of her hand with a feather-light kiss. "Au Revoir, Chére."
*** *** ***
Rogue's breath stopped as she waited for Mrs. Cordelia Hayes's response to
her son's engagement. The old woman smiled falsely. "Well, I am happy to
see that my boy will finally have a wife to take care of him," she said.
She looked Rogue over, and Rogue could tell she was adding silently, "Even
if it is you."
"I know that weddings take time, Mother," Zander began. "But Rogue and I would like to be married as soon as possible."
"Oh, of course," Mrs. Hayes said. "Have you chosen a wedding planner yet?"
"No, we were hoping you would be able to help us prepare," Zander said.
"Of course," Mrs. Hayes said with her painted-on smile. "I would be able to provide you with the best in town…"
"We would appreciate that very much, Mother."
"What's with all this 'we' crap?" Rogue wondered. "Zander's the one wanting a speedy wedding. Well, I guess once you get married all the 'I's' are replaced with 'we's.'"
"I can give you the number of the woman that planned that absolutely gorgeous wedding your sister just had," Mrs. Hayes said. "And if you tell her you are my son, she'll most likely be able to get you an appointment this afternoon."
"That would be wonderful," Zander said.
"And how about you, Rogue?" Mrs. Hayes asked. "You have not had much to say about this."
"I'm very happy with it all," Rogue said, mimicking Mrs. Hayes's smile. "I'm just sure that you'll have a better idea of how to plan a wedding than I ever would."
"Yes, I'm sure you're right," Mrs. Hayes said in a tone that made Rogue feel very small. She turned back to her son. "How about I get you that number and you can call right away?"
*** *** ***
Gambit didn't know her name. All he knew is she had green eyes and she was in his arms. He kissed her, touched her, all the while just calling her "Chére." He led her over to the bed of the cheap motel. She was just another woman. There had been plenty before her. It would be good for both of them, but mean nothing. The easy way…
He lay on top of her, kissing her and making her sigh. Remy LeBeau was charming. Women willingly fell into his arms. This one was no different. He told himself this over and over again, but it wasn't convincing. She was different—different from what he wanted. She wasn't Rogue.
He got up and sat on the end of the bed, hanging his head in his hands. "What's wrong, Handsome?" the woman asked.
"I can't do dis," Remy said.
"Why not?" the woman asked, adjusting her shirt. "Is it me?"
"Non, not you."
She moved over to sit beside him. "What then?"
"'Not'er woman."
"You married or somethin'?"
"No, but she's about to be."
"Ouch."
Gambit snorted. "Yeah, ouch."
"You love 'er?"
"Yeah. Have for a while."
"So tell her."
Gambit looked at the woman like she was crazy. "How would dat do any good? She's marryin' some rich psychiatrist guy who's 'respected in de community.' What do I got to offer dat's better den dat?"
"Well, you're a guy passing up a chance at cheap, meaningless sex, so I'd say you have a lot of love to offer."
"Dat's never been enough for her. She was always wantin' more den I could give."
"Then you don't need her."
"Wish it was that simple."
"What's so wonderful about her that you'd pine like this even when she's with another man?" the woman asked.
"I don' know how to describe it," Remy said. "Dere's jus' somet'in' I feel when I'm wit' her—like no ot'er feelin' in de world. We been t'rough a lot, an' even t'ough it's been over for a while, I haven't been able t'let go. Findin' out she had hit me hard."
"So you guys had something once?"
"Yeah. Long time 'go. We had our ups an' downs—lotta downs, but de love, it was dere. Least f'me it always was."
"So talk to her. Tell her how you feel. Sure, there's always the chance she'll confirm your belief that it's over, but that sure beats spending the rest of your life wondering what could've happened if you'd just taken that chance."
Gambit stood up. "Maybe. I don' know. Look, I need t'get goin'. You okay wit' me jus' leavin' like dis?"
The woman shrugged. "Sure. It would've been fun, but I understand. And really, talk to the girl. I bet you're better than that psychiatrist anyway. Respectable men are so overrated."
Gambit laughed. "T'anks, Chére. I'll keep in mind what you said."
She grinned. "You do that."
Gambit left, and she flopped down on the bed, wondering if he'd pay for the hotel room the remainder of the night or not.
*** *** ***
Rogue wasn't really paying any attention as the planner went over the current color scheme with Rogue, Zander, and Zander's mother. She just nodded at the same time the others did and tried her best not to look bored. After all, this was her wedding. Still, there was no way she was going to go against any of the decisions made by Cordelia Hayes. In Mrs. Hayes's eyes, Rogue was nothing but a, ill-bred hick, despite all she'd done to make herself look good on Zander's arm.
"Well, I guess I'll send these colors to the florists and decorators right away and have them begin," the planner said. She looked over at Rogue. "Unless the bride has any complaints…you've been awfully quiet today."
"Oh, no, all this is just fine," Rogue said. "I've been quiet because everything you've chosen is so lovely."
The wedding planner beamed at the praise. "I'm glad you think so. Everything set here then?"
"Yes, this will do quite all right," Mrs. Hayes said. "And we still have our appointment tomorrow to decide on the catering?"
"Of course, Cordelia."
"Then we will see you then. Good day." She stood up. "Come alone Zander, Rogue."
Rogue stood up to follow them out, although the way Mrs. Hayes said her name reminded Rogue much of the way someone would call to a dog. "Probably one of those little yippy ones, too," Rogue thought.
"Is that all we have to do today?" Rogue asked Zander once they were alone in his car.
"Yes." Zander frowned. "Aren't you enjoying planning our wedding?"
"Of course," Rogue said. "It's just your mother, she…"
"You don't like my mother?" Zander cut her off.
"No…no, that isn't it at all. She just seems to be, very, um, controlling."
"She knows what's best," Zander said. "All she wants is for us to have the perfect wedding. This is the most important day of our lives."
"I know," Rogue said. "Just some things…like the church where she wants us to get married…"
"What’s wrong with that?" Zander asked. "People from my family have been getting married there for generations."
"I know, and it's a beautiful church. It's just, well, I always pictured myself getting married at the mansion," Rogue said.
Zander sighed. "Rogue, the mansion really wouldn't be a plausible place for us to get married. I mean, many of my family members would probably not want to be on the grounds of the Xavier School, and well, it isn't like you'll be spending much time at that mansion once we get married anyway."
Rogue's head whipped around to look at him. "What are you talking about?"
"Rogue, you didn't actually plan on saying with the X-Men, did you?" Zander asked.
"Zander, the X-Men are my life. I can't leave them completely."
"You can't exactly be a wife and a superhero at the same time."
"Jean's been able to handle it just fine."
"I'm not living at the mansion, Rogue. And we're not Cyclops and Phoenix by any stretch of the imagination," Zander said. "Besides, I doubt their marriage has been exactly perfect, either."
"Zander, I'm not talking about us living at the mansion or me being on permanent active duty, I'm just saying that I'm not going to stop being a member of the X-Men completely. The Professor took me in at a time when I had no one else to go to. If they need me, I'm not going to turn my back on them. The X-Men are my life."
"I'm your life now, Rogue."
"Zander, being an X-Man is a part of who I am."
Zander pulled the car into the mansion's driveway. "Rogue, there's no point in discussing this. It's time you moved on and had your own life, away from this…school."
"Zander, these people are my friends, my family."
"I'm not asking you to cut them out of your life, I just don't want you running off to save the universe at every possible opportunity."
"You've never minded me being an X-Man before."
"You weren't my wife before."
Zander stopped the car, and Rogue got out. "I'll see you tomorrow," she said as she walked off.
"Rogue, wait," Zander said as he ran out after her. "I don't want us to part like this, my darling."
"I'm not mad, Zander. I just don't want to give up the X-Men like that."
"Rogue, you have to realize it's for the best. We're going to start our life together—I can't be always running the risk of losing you the way I would if you were an X-Man"
"Zander, I'm not exactly at risk of getting killed in battle anytime soon. I'm invulnerable, remember? And I'm not going to be always running off, I'm just going to go when they need me."
"I don't like it, Rogue."
"Zander, I…"
"So dis is Zander?"
Rogue whipped around to face Gambit. "Remy! What are you doing out here?"
"I was about t'go out, an' I heard de two of you. Figured I'd come an' meet dis Dr. Zander Hayes I'd heard people mention."
Rogue sighed. "Fine. Remy, this is Zander—Zander, Remy LeBeau."
Zander's eyes grew wide as Rogue introduced him to Gambit. He took his outstretched hand and shook. "Nice to meet you, Mr. LeBeau," he said, regaining his normal calm, suave attitude. "I've heard much about you from Rogue, but I didn't know you'd come back to New York."
"Only been here a couple of days," Remy said. "An' de chére's been too busy plannin' de weddin' to bot'er with an' ol' t'ief like Remy."
"Zander, why don't you go on home?" Rogue asked.
Zander didn't like the idea of leaving Rogue alone with the charming Cajun she'd spoken of so much in the past. He looked like the kind of man who could easily sweep a woman off her feet, and with the history he had with Rogue, that could be even simpler. "Actually, I think I might stick around a while longer," he said.
Gambit smiled. "Well, in dat case maybe I could have de chance t'get t'know you a little better, Zander. You say you've heard a lot 'bout me, but I'm afraid I can't say de same t'ing 'bout you."
"Rogue hasn't told you about me?"
"Only dat you're her fiancé. Ot'er den dat, I'm 'fraid your name hasn't come up."
Rogue felt a wave of nervousness. She didn't know what was going to happen, but she knew she didn't want Remy and Zander spending too much time together. Zander had always been the jealous type, and although Remy had made it clear he was over Rogue, she was sure he would be more than willing to bait Zander.
"Maybe we'll have to talk some then," Zander said, trying to puff himself up.
"Come in den, have a drink wit' me."
"I don't know how good of an idea that is…" Rogue said.
But neither man was listening to her. They were already making their way towards the mansion. Rogue sighed and reluctantly followed them.
*** *** ***
"So you're gonna marry Rogue?" Gambit asked, handing Zander a drink.
"Yes, we're getting married at the end of the month," Zander said.
"Well, be careful wit' dat one," Gambit said. "Make 'er mad, an' ya might find yourself stranded in a frozen wasteland…"
"Remy…" Rogue said her tone warning.
Remy smiled. "Jus' givin' de man a little warnin', Chére."
"What is he talking about, Rogue?" Zander asked.
Gambit raised an eyebrow. "Keepin' secrets from someone you profess t'love, Rogue? Ain't dat de cardinal sin in your book?"
"Remy, stop," Rogue said.
Gambit felt a sudden wave of anger at Rogue that he knew wasn't completely rational, but present nonetheless. She'd often been cruel to him during their relationship, and now here she was marrying another man. "Stop what, Rogue? Tellin' de homme what you do t'lovers dat don't keep ya happy?"
"Remy, dammit, ya know what happened there!" she yelled, her accent heavier than it had been in years. "An' I doubt Zander's gonna turn out t'have once worked for a man like Sinister!"
"Oh, of course—as usual, I was always de bad one in everyt'ing. You're not'in' but an innocent, Rogue."
"I never said I was innocent!" Rogue yelled. "But not every bad thing between us was my fault!"
Zander watched in surprise as the two debated. It was obvious they'd forgotten he was even present. Rogue had told him about her frequent arguments with Remy LeBeau, but he'd never expected to see one up close.
"Maybe not, Chére, but you never accepted any of de blame, did ya? Even Antarctica—you did dat 'cause my voice was in your head tellin' ya to. Everyt'ing' Gambit's fault. It was always you bein' gracious 'nough t'take me back in de end, too, no matter what you'd done t'me."
"Remy, Antarctica wasn't your fault, okay? And I made mistakes in the relationship, I know that."
"Not my fault, non? Your fault, den?"
"No one's! It was just, somethin' that shouldn't have happened."
"Oh really? Nice of you t'be so calm 'bout somet'ing dat nearly killed me."
"It was years ago!"
"An' all dese years been ones Remy almost didn't have!"
Zander stood up, deciding he'd listened to them bicker back and forth for long enough. "Would somebody please explain to me what happened in Antarctica?"
Rogue blushed, remembering that her fiancé was still in the room. "It's just something that happened between Remy and me years ago that he seems to have not been able to get over yet."
"Who gets over de woman he loves leavin' 'im in a frozen wasteland t'die jus' 'cause she finds somet'in' out 'bout him she don' wanna hear?"
"You left him to die?" Zander asked. That certainly wasn't something Rogue had mentioned in the past—even during their therapy sessions.
"I didn't know what I was doing. There were these voices in my head and…"
"Voices in your head," Remy cut her off. "You're a psychiatrist, Zander—maybe you can check dat out f'her."
"Remy, you know damn good an' well I'm referrin' to the effects of my powers."
Gambit just rolled his eyes.
Zander put his arm around Rogue's shoulder. "Darling, maybe we should leave. He seems very upset and…"
"Don' take 'er anywhere cold," Gambit muttered. "Maybe keep her 'way from clones of psychopat's, too. She can't resist 'em."
"Stop it!" Rogue yelled. "Zander, I want to leave."
"Yeah, let's go."
Gambit just sat down on the couch as they walked away.
*** *** ***
"Zander, I can't even begin to tell you how sorry I am about that," Rogue said as they went back out to his car.
"It's all right, my love. Ex-lovers never take too well to new fiancés."
"I guess you're right," Rogue said with a sigh. "And Remy can be rather…immature at times."
"You two were together for a long time, weren't you?" Zander asked.
"Off and on, yeah," Rogue said. "We called it off so often it became a joke around the mansion."
"Is he back for good?" Zander asked, opening the door of his car for her.
"He says he is," Rogue said. "And he never really was one to leave a lot before. I mean, he'd go home to New Orleans fairly regularly, but those were more like vacations than anything else." She looked forward, away from Zander. "I used to make him feel guilty about them anyway."
Zander shut her door and went around to get in on the driver's side. "You have a lot of repressed guilt about the relationship it seems," he commented.
"Yeah, and apparently he's got some repressed anger…"
"You said he just left one day, about what—three years ago? It's normal for there to be unresolved issues between the two of you."
"I was thinking something like that," Rogue said. "Lack of closure."
Zander frowned. "Do you feel in need of closure for that chapter of your life? I mean with our wedding coming up…"
She gave him her most convincing smile. "For the most part, I'm over anything that happened between Remy and me. I guess stuff just starts to rise to the surface when he's around and baiting me like that."
"All the more reason for you to leave the X-Men once we're married. Such emotional stress isn't healthy, Rogue."
"I know…I'm beginning to think maybe quitting is the right thing to do."
"It is."
"It's just hard."
"I know." Zander started the car. "Where to?"
"Can I just stay at your place tonight? I don't feel like being under the same roof as Remy."
Zander reached over and gave her hand a quick, loving squeeze. "Anything you want."
*** *** ***
Remy sat alone on the roof of the mansion, taking long drags off his cigarettes. The roof had always been one of Rogue's favorite places, and she was what was on Remy's mind then. He'd come up there with her some, and it had been one of the places where he'd formed good memories of her. He thought back to when she'd been suffering from flash blindness and had admitted to him that she wanted to have someone to hold her, and most of all, she wanted that someone to be him.
"Guess de chére's changed her mind on dat one," Gambit mused aloud.
Their relationship had never exactly been stable, but Remy had never truly considered the possibility that it might come to a real end someday. They'd walked away so many times in the past, yet they'd always come back to each other as well. And he'd never thought she'd chose another man over him. He'd had competition for her affections before; however, he'd always been the one she'd chosen in the end. Now that he looked back on it, poor Joseph hadn't really stood a chance.
Gambit hated himself for staying away so long. At the time, though, it had seemed like the right thing to do. He'd been so angry at Rogue that leaving her and never looking back had seemed like not only something he could do, but what he wanted to do. At that point, if someone had told him that Rogue would marry another man he wouldn't have cared.
He flicked his cigarette, wondering if maybe this was the effect of that old saying "absence makes the heart grow fonder." Did he only want Rogue because he'd been away from her for so long that he couldn't remember why he'd left in the first place? Or maybe he only desired what he couldn't have, an accusation that had been thrown at him quite regularly when he'd first began to flirt with a woman with untouchable skin.
Flirtation. That's all it had been at the beginning with Rogue. He liked a woman that would give a good chase, and Rogue definitely fit that description. He'd never intended to fall in love, never intended to even continue the pursuit once he'd caught her attention. But then something had happened, something Remy had never counted on. She effected him in a way that no other woman had in the past, and he eventually realized he'd fallen in love with her.
By that point, there was no turning back. Rogue was in his blood, a part of him. He would've died for her, and he realized that even now, he still would. He had always gladly taken the punishment she'd thrown his way just for the chance to see her smile, even once. She'd made a love-sick masochist out of a man who had once been proud to be a charming womanizer. Funny the things your heart makes you do.
He went over the fight he'd had with her earlier that day, and wondered why he was longing for her now, when then he'd felt mainly resentment towards her. Why could Rogue do that to his emotions, even so many years after they'd last been together?
Remy knew she'd left with Zander, and hated to think about them being together right then. Was he touching the skin that had always been forbidden to him? It would've been naïve to think that Remy and Rogue had allowed her powers to drive them to a chaste relationship, but no matter how close they got, there was always a barrier. Zander could touch her with impunity, and Remy hated to think that he could be somewhere doing that right then.
As he thought more about their earlier argument, Remy felt guilty. He'd said so much to her about Antarctica, even though he could see the pain and remorse in her eyes at the very mention of the continent, and truthfully, Remy had forgiven her for it years ago. He knew it was jealousy that had spurred him to yell at her in front of Zander, and he hated himself for it.
Gambit had lost Rogue, and he knew it was time to accept that fact, no matter how much it hurt.
Remy continued smoking his cigarette, no longer allowing himself to think.
*** *** ***
Despite the humidity of the night, Rogue was cold. She'd woken up late in the night and slipped out of Zander's bed to sit on the balcony. From there, she had a breathtaking view of the New York City skyline at night, and she wondered briefly just how much in rent Zander must pay a month.
Looking ahead of her, Rogue wanted to fly. She speculated if that was something else she'd have to give up for Zander. Did opulent housewives get to take to the skies whenever they felt the urge? She wondered if that question was answered in one of the books of upper-class manners that she'd all but memorized before meeting Zander's mother.
Not that they had done much good. The moment Rogue had walked into the room, Cordelia Hayes had looked at her as if she had the word "trash" tattooed to her forehead. "Guess women like me are branded at birth," Rogue thought to herself. She knew she wasn't at all the type of wife Mrs. Hayes would've chosen for her son, and she knew Cordelia was still upset that Zander hadn't taken to any of the women she'd introduced him to.
She wondered what Zander did see in her. She'd asked the same question to Jubilee, who'd joked that maybe he was a villain who was using Rogue as a part of an evil scheme. Rogue almost half wished he was. She'd know what to do if that was the case. But since he wasn't, she was just confused.
Zander was the first man she'd had a "normal" relationship with. Since he'd helped her overcome her mutation before they'd gotten together, her deadly skin had never been an issue. And he'd been neither villain, nor superhero, so they'd never even had a date interrupted by some type of superior being.
And Zander had never been anything but wonderful to her. He was one of the few people who would listen to her as if her ideas were anything but an uneducated woman spouting off. He'd made her more secure in herself, and she no longer regarded her own thoughts as unintelligent. She felt that he'd helped her to grow more than she ever had before, and although he'd changed her in many ways, they'd been changes for the better.
He'd never been lacking in passion either. Zander's touch had always electrified her, and there was no way to deny a physical attraction between the two. Rogue had even overheard Mrs. Hayes remarking to her daughter Monica that Zander only wanted Rogue because of the palpable sparks between them. And then she'd added something about how when Zander's libido calmed some, Rogue would be long gone. Rogue wondered if Mrs. Hayes was still waiting for that, even with the wedding approaching.
Zander had given Rogue everything she could ever want. She'd been grateful to him for his help with her control, and she'd always looked up to him. He made her want to strive for more than she had, to improve herself more than she ever had before. Jean had remarked once that it seemed almost like Rogue was struggling to make herself worthy of Zander.
Rogue looked back out over the skyline, drawing her knees up to her chest and shivering slightly. Zander really was the perfect man in so many ways. He loved her, respected her, gave her all she could ever want or need. Even his desire that she leave her life as an X-Man was fueled by his love for her. She'd found what so many women wanted in their lives. So why wasn't it enough?
Why couldn't she stop thinking about Remy LeBeau?
*** *** ***
Sings the streets a serenade
He's layin' everybody low
He's gotta love song that he made
He finds a convenient street light
Steps out of the shade and says somethin' like
You and me, babe, how about it?
Juliet says hey, it's Romeo
Ya nearly give me a heart attack
Yeah, well
He's underneath my window,
Now she's singin', hey la, my boyfriend's back
You shouldn't come around here
Singin' up to people like that
Ah, anyway, whatcha gonna do about it?
Juliet, the dice were loaded from the start
And I bet, and you exploded into my heart
And I forget, I forget
The movie song
When ya gonna realize
It was just that the time was wrong?
Julie…
We both come up on different streets
But they were both the streets of shame
Both dirty, both mean
Yes, even the dreams were the same
I dreamed your dream for you
And now your dream is real, so tell me, honey
How can you look at me as if I was
Just another one of your deals?
Now you can fall for change of silver
You can fall for change of gold
You know ya fall for pretty strangers
And the promises they hold
Well, you promised me everything
And then, the ya
promised me thick and then
And now you just turn away and say, Romeo?
I think I used to have a scene with him
Ah, Juliet, when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above,
Gonna love ya 'till I die
There's a place for us
I know you know this song
Now when ya gonna realize
It was just that the time was wrong?
Julie, I'm so in love
So in love
But I can't do the talk
Not like they talk on my T.V. screen
Can't do a love song,
Not the way you sang it to me
Can't do anything, but I would do anything for you
Can't do anything except
Be in love with you
All I do is miss you
And the way it used to be
All I do is keep the beat
I keep bad, bad company
And all I do is kiss you
Through the bars of this rhyme,
When Julie,
Juliet, when we made love you used to cry
You said I love you like the stars above
I'm gonna love ya 'till I die
There's a place for us
I know you know the movie song
One day we're gonna realize
It was just that the time was wrong
Julie…Julie…Juliet
Now this love struck Romeo
Sings the streets a serenade
He's layin' everybody low
He's got a love song that he made
He finds a convenient streetlight,
Step out of the shade and say somethin' like
You and me, babe, how about it?
*** *** ***
It was one week until the wedding, and Rogue was busy putting into motion all the plans Cordelia Hayes had made. She'd managed to avoid Remy since their confrontation at the mansion in front of Zander—mainly because she'd been avoiding the mansion almost entirely. If she was going to stop being an X-Man, then she might as well begin weaning herself from it.
Rogue was currently at yet another wedding dress alteration session. It seemed like every time she turned around, Mrs. Hayes was "suggesting" Rogue have something else done to the dress. Rogue looked down as the seamstress worked diligently. Sure, it wasn't exactly what she would've picked on her own for her wedding dress, but it was still nice.
She glanced up at the clock on the wall. She had to be at the mansion in forty-five minutes for the bridal shower her fellow X-Women were throwing for her. "Are you almost done?" Rogue asked. She was sick of having to act like a mannequin.
"Almost," the woman replied through the straight pins in her teeth. "Just a few more stitches."
Rogue tried to concentrate on something other than the agonizing process of creating what Cordelia Hayes believed to be the prefect wedding dress. She kept reminding herself that in only one week, the wedding would be over and Zander's mother would be out of her hair.
Rogue frowned. Who was she kidding? Zander's mother would bother them until the day she finally keeled over and died, and with Rogue's luck, that wouldn't be anytime soon. She figured a mother-in-law from hell was just another concession she'd have to make for being with Zander.
Rogue failed to notice how quickly those concessions were piling up.
*** *** ***
"What's all dis?" Gambit asked as he walked in on the mansion's female population obviously preparing for something.
"We're setting up for Rogue's bridal shower," Jean said. She stopped hanging streamers and turned around to face him. "Are you going to be okay with this being here?"
Gambit erected his best mental shields over his emotions and shrugged. "Sure? Why should I care? Most brides get a bridal shower, Rogue havin' one means not'in' t'me."
"Are you sure?" Jubilee asked.
"Oui." He went to the fridge and got a beer. "I'll be in de den if any of you ladies needs me."
Remy walked out of the kitchen and into the den. He fell back onto the couch, popped open his beer, and flipped on the television. Some sappy soap opera was on, with a man looking meaningfully into the mirror while his thoughts played in voiceover. Apparently, he'd disappeared only to return to find the love of his life in the arms of another man.
"Mon Dieu," Gambit muttered. "When did my life get t'be a soap opera?" He could suddenly see Rogue as one of the queens of daytime and he couldn't help but laugh. Maybe she'd have been well-suited for that career with her flair for over dramatizing everything.
He flipped the channel and found American Movie Classics playing Gone with the Wind yet again. In his mind, Rogue became Scarlet, with himself as Rhett Butler and Zander as Ashley. He shook his head and changed the channel again. He didn't want to have to think about Rogue.
Discovery Channel. That should be safe. What could the Discovery Channel possibly have to remind him of Rogue? They returned from commercial break to resume their special on—skunks? Remy groaned. The little white-striped animals were reminding him of Rogue's hair. He downed the rest of his beer in one gulp, then turned off the television. Apparently it was not helping him clear his mind one bit.
He got off the couch and decided he'd lock himself up in his room while Rogue was there, maybe play some solitaire or something. However, he apparently had terrible timing, since he walked into the main hall of the X-Mansion at almost the exact second Rogue came through the door.
*** *** ***
Rogue walked in and all but ran straight into Gambit. "Excuse me," she said softly as she moved past.
"Chére, wait…" Remy said.
Rogue turned around and felt all her long-buried emotions for Remy LeBeau come rushing to the surface. "What?"
"Wanted t'say I'm sorry for de way I acted 'round Zander. Dat wasn't right t'do to ya."
"It's all right," Rogue said, hoping her voice wasn't cracking. "I understand why you're upset with me."
Remy shook his head. "Non. Dat was de past. You've moved on, so should I. I don' need t'make ya feel guilty for somet'ing dat happen so long ago."
Rogue looked down. "But the way I treated you…I've never forgiven myself for that, Remy."
Remy took Rogue's chin in his hand and tilted her face so he could look her in the eyes. He could see her flush and hear her breath quicken at the contact. "You should forgive yourself, Chére. I forgave you 'long time ago."
"Even for Antarctica?"
"Oui."
"Why, Remy? You coulda died. I almost killed you…"
"Easy to forgive someone you love."
Rogue felt as if the world was spinning out of control. Remy's bare hand was touching her face and it would've been so easy to just lean up and kiss him. "Remy, I…"
He moved his hand back down to his side and took a step back. "Dey're waitin' for you in dere, Rogue."
She nodded, not trusting her ability to speak, then went into the kitchen.
*** *** ***
"Rogue, are you all right?" Storm asked as Rogue walked in.
"You look a little…pale," Psylocke added.
"I'm fine," Rogue lied. "It's just been a long day. This wedding has me running all over the place."
"Here, sit down," Jean said, pulling out a chair for her. "I'll get you some water."
Rogue sat down and a moment later took a floating glass of water from the air. "Thank you, Jean."
"So what exactly about this wedding has you so bent out of shape?" Jubilee asked. "I mean, I know they're hard—I sorta had one myself once—but you look, well, terrible."
Rogue couldn't bring herself to admit that it was talking to Gambit that had gotten her so flustered, although she figured Jean and Betsy probably already knew. One of the things you get used to when you live with telepaths. "It's all these hoops I have to jump through to please Zander's mother," she said. After all, it was partially true. That was bothering her.
"I do not understand why you let her push you around," Storm said. "This is supposed to be a day in which all of your dreams come true—not hers."
"Want me to hit her with a psychic knife?" Betsy asked in a tone that made Rogue wonder if she was kidding or not. "I could make it look like natural causes."
"Betsy…" Jean warned.
Psylocke rolled her eyes.
"No, I think it'll be all right," Rogue said. "I keep telling myself if I can just hold on and get through this wedding, I'll be with Zander and everything will be fine."
"You're wedding day shouldn't look like a dark spot on the horizon, Rogue," Jean said.
Rogue sighed. "I know, and it doesn't, it's just…well, when it's over I can relax."
"Where are you guys going for your honeymoon?" Jubilee asked.
"Some expensive resort in the Caribbean," Rogue said.
"You don't know the name of it?" Betsy asked.
"Zander's dealing with all that."
"Hey, Rogue, I've been meaning to ask you," Jubilee began, "What are you going to do about the team? I mean, I know being married is going to keep you away a lot, but…"
"I'm quitting the X-Men."
The other women looked at her in shock. "What? You're leaving?" Betsy asked.
"Yes. Well, Zander thinks…we think…it would be for the best."
"Geez, Rogue, we're really gonna miss you around here," Jubilee said.
"I'm gonna miss y'all, too," Rogue said, "But this is what I have to do."
"Is it you who feels that way or Zander?" Jean asked.
"Both of us," Rogue answered, hoping Jean wasn't trying to probe past her surface thoughts.
Even without the aid of her telepathic abilities, Jean was unconvinced—as was everyone else in the room.
*** *** ***
Rogue was having a good time with her friends, but a glance at the clock told her she needed to be getting home. "It's late," she said, standing up. "Zander's probably wondering where I am."
"Didn't you tell him you were coming here?" Betsy asked.
"Yes, but he still worries when I'm gone a long time."
Jubilee stood up and gave Rogue a quick hug. "Thanks for coming by and hanging with us today," she said. "And I really wish you wouldn't leave."
Rogue smiled. "This coming from the girl who's been gone from here for—how many years has it been now?"
"Hey, I'm back," Jubilee said. "Besides, I was driven away."
"You were not," Jean said. "We just wanted what was best for you."
Jubilee smiled. "Really? Ask your husband about that. I think Scott got rid of me on purpose."
"Well, you did dye his hair bright green once…" Jean said.
"And pink another time," Betsy reminded her, stifling a giggle.
"I was young and rebellious!" Jubilee defended herself. "Besides, hot pink really is his color."
As the X-Men began their usual, friendly banter, Rogue wanted to leave even more. It only served to remind her how much she was going to miss them. "Well, I'm out of here. See y'all later," she said, moving towards the door. She barely paid any attention to the various "good-byes" that were thrown her way.
Remy was leaning against a column on the front porch, smoking a cigarette, when she walked outside. She'd been hoping to avoid him, but here he was, right in front of her again. He looked momentarily startled by her presence, but soon relaxed into his laid-back persona.
"Evenin', Chére."
"Hey, Remy."
"Enjoy de shower?"
"Yeah."
"Dey didn't give ya any presents?"
"They're already in my car." She pointed to his cigarette. "I wish you wouldn't smoke those things. They're so bad for you. I saw this special on Dateline the other night and it showed all the terrible things that are happening to your lungs right now and…"
Remy silenced her by snuffing out the cigarette. "Dat better?"
"Yeah. Would be even better if I knew you weren't going to light another one as soon as I left."
"Den don' leave an' I won't light anot'er one."
Rogue's pulse began to race at the thought of staying there with Gambit. "I…I can't. I have to get home to Zander."
"He got ya on a short leash already?"
Rogue's eyes narrowed at the insinuation that her fiancé would have control over her like that. "No, he just worries when I'm out too late. Zander lets me do what I want, Remy."
"Really? So he's okay wit' you bein' an X-Man den? After y'all get married?"
"I'm quitting the team after I get married," Rogue said.
"Zander tell ya t'do dat?"
"We discussed it, and we both think it's for the best."
"Dat don' sound like you, Rogue. De X-Men always been one of de most important thing in your life."
"You haven't seen me in three years, Remy," Rogue said. "People change."
"Oui, I guess dey do. Night, ma chérie," he said as he started to walk back into the mansion.
"Remy?" He stopped and turned to look at her. "Even if we can't be together anymore, I don't want to lose you completely. You were the best friend I ever had. Not having you around these past few years, well, it's been hard. Especially since I knew I was to blame for you leaving."
Remy shook his head. "Non. It was my decision to leave. An' it was a bad one at dat."
"Bad? How so?"
He moved over so close to her that they were almost touching. "I lost you."
"But the relationship we had. We fought so much and…"
"We were in love, Chére. You can't deny dat. Even wit' all the fightin', it was love."
"Deep love," Rogue said, almost in a whisper. "The kind that only comes once in a lifetime."
"You don' love Zander like dat?"
"It doesn't matter," she said, looking up and feeling as if his red-on-black eyes were seeing straight through to her soul. "What you and I had is part of the past."
"De past can repeat itself, y'know," Gambit said, reaching out to stroke her cheek, barely even touching her.
"Remy, we can't…Zander he…"
Gambit didn't wait around to hear what she was about to say about her fiancé. He pulled her into his arms and kissed her the way he'd always wanted to do: with no barriers, no fear of her powers—just passion. Rogue felt the fire in his lips and knew she would sink to her knees if he hadn't had a hand on her back to support her. She melted into the kiss, and everything else seemed to fade away around her.
But as Remy pulled away, reality hit her cold. "Remy…" Her voice went away as she began to cry, and she ran from the porch.
Remy leaned against the wall and lit another cigarette. "Merde."
*** *** ***
Rogue sat in a chair in the living room, looking at Zander as he watched the news. He'd told her he'd been worried about her when she'd stayed out later than he'd thought she was going to, and then had pulled her into his arms and kissed her, telling her how glad he was she was home.
Rogue didn't feel as if she were home. She was in Zander's apartment. She sighed as she watched him, knowing that she better make the place seem like home to her pretty soon, since after the wedding she'd be moving in officially. And in a couple of years, they'd be buying a house together outside the city so they could raise a family.
Rogue reached up and touched her lips, her mind comparing Zander's kiss to Remy's. In the few times in the past when she and Gambit had been able to kiss, there had always been something there that she didn't remember ever feeling with Zander. She'd decided it was because whenever she'd been able to kiss Remy it had been under some sort of strange circumstance. The thrill of the moment must've been what gave the kisses so much passion. She told herself that was all it had been this time, too. She hadn't seen Remy for years and here he was, finally able to touch her. That, combined with the forbidden nature of a kiss shared with someone other than her fiancé must have been what made it affect Rogue the way it had.
That had to be all it was.
She looked back over at Zander. He was concentrating on the news, not even as much as glancing up at Rogue. She wondered why he'd even cared about how long she'd been gone. He certainly wasn't paying her any attention now. She got up from the chair and sat beside him. He still stared ahead at the television. She moved closer to him and put her hand on his leg. He shifted slightly, but that was it. She slid over until she was right beside him, wrapping her arm around his and resting her head on his chest. He looked over at her. "Do you need something?"
She kissed him on the cheek. "I haven't seen you all day," she said. "I've missed you."
He slipped his arm out from hers. "I'm watching the news right now, darling. We can talk when it's over."
Rogue slid to the other side of the couch, crossing her arms over her chest and pouting. She knew if she'd stayed with Remy that night he would've been paying attention to her. She sighed. That wasn't fair to Zander, she realized. He didn't know all that was going through her head, didn't know why she was suddenly desperate for his affection. And so what if Remy would've been there for her that night? What about the next night and the night after that? If she left Zander to go back to Remy, how soon would it be until they fell back into their pattern of constant fights and break-ups? At least with Zander she had stability.
Rogue tried to make herself forget what it had been like to kiss Gambit. She'd made her decision, and she knew it was the right thing to do.
*** *** ***
Cordelia Hayes decided that she needed to throw an engagement party even though the schedule of events between Rogue and Zander's announcement of their engagement and the actually date of the ceremony made it so the first available opportunity to throw such a party was three days before the wedding. Zander had said it wasn't necessary, but Mrs. Hayes had gone on about how socially-unacceptable that was until she'd finally gotten her way.
When the day came, Rogue was running around the party, doing her best to behave in a way befitting the fiancé of a man in Zander's position—talking politely to his friends, and smiling to the point that her cheeks hurt.
"Rogue's not acting like herself," Jubilee commented to Bobby Drake.
Bobby shook his head. "Nope. She hasn't punched anyone through a wall all night."
"Come on, Bobby, I'm trying to be serious," Jubilee said, although the corners of her lips were turning up in a small smile. "The way she's behaving, it's like she's trying to be someone else."
"Probably trying to fit in with this crowd," Bobby said. "I've been to parties held at Frost Enterprises that were less stiff than this."
"Aren't weddings supposed to be happy occasions?" Jubilee asked.
"Apparently not when three-fourths of the guests have sticks up their asses bigger than that one Scott's always trying to walk around with."
"Is Rogue really happy with him?"
Bobby shrugged. "I guess. She says she is. And she seemed happy until a few weeks ago. Maybe the stress of the fact that the wedding's so close is getting to her."
"Maybe she's still in love with Gambit," Jubilee suggested.
"I hope not," Bobby said with a groan. "Never liked that guy."
"You were just jealous."
"Huh?"
"Oh, don't play dumb, Robert. You know you wanted Rogue."
"So do you think she's making a mistake marrying Zander?" Bobby asked.
"I don't know," Jubilee replied. "I've been trying to figure it out myself. I think she could be content with him, it's just—something's missing."
"And you think that something has red eyes and tends to wear a brown duster?"
Jubilee laughed. "It very well may."
As much as he didn't like Remy, Bobby didn't much like the idea of Rogue being unhappy either. "So what do we do?"
"Nothing, I'm afraid," Jubilee said. "We can't make Rogue's decisions for her. If this is the wrong thing for her to do, she'll figure it out on her own eventually."
Bobby looked back over at Rogue as she laughed charmingly at something one of Zander's brothers said. "If that's the case, I just hope she signed a good prenup."
*** *** ***
Everyone in the mansion except for Remy had gone to Rogue's engagement party. The last thing he wanted to have to do was spend all night watching Rogue on Zander's arm.
And the more he thought about it, Gambit realized he didn't want to have to watch Zander with Rogue at all. He didn't even want to think about it. He knew he still loved Rogue, and her being with another man was more than Gambit could handle.
Remy had come back to the mansion in an attempt to win back Rogue's heart. So why was he staying now? He'd lost her, and there was no way to get them back to where they used to be. He had to move on with his life, maybe even find someone else to love. Nothing remained at the mansion to hold him there.
He planned to be gone before anyone of the others returned.
*** *** ***
Rogue felt exhausted as she tried to keep the guests happy. She knew she better get used to this, since as Zander's wife she'd probably be doing a good bit of entertaining.
Still, she needed some fresh air. She was on her way out to the back for a breather when she passed the living room and heard Zander's mother and his sister, Monica, talking.
"I don't know why you're letting Zander marry that woman, Mother. She's obviously beneath him."
"I know, dear, but Zander's smitten. There's no way I could convince him not to marry her."
"You said before you thought it was just a physical attraction," Monica said. "Do you still believe that?"
"I don't know," Mrs. Hayes replied. "I believe that hussy may have actually gotten more of a hold on Zander than that by now. Pity, too. She'll probably raise my grandchildren to be trash."
"Only thing that would be wrong with my children would be they might get the bitch gene you obviously have and passed on to your daughter, Cordelia."
Zander's mother and sister turned around to see Rogue standing in the doorway, glaring. "What did you just say to us?" Mrs. Hayes asked.
"I called y'all a couple of bitches," Rogue said. "Although I don't know why you'd give a damn about the opinion of a trashy hussy."
"You have no right to talk to my mother that way," Monica said.
"I have as much right to as she does to say those things about me."
"No you don't! You're in no way equal to us."
"Zander doesn't seem to agree," Rogue said.
"If he was thinking clearly, he would," Mrs. Hayes said. "He would see the same as I do that you're nothing but a two-bit hooker with a terrible dye job."
As Rogue's fist impacted with her face, Mrs. Hayes learned why you do not insult a woman with super strength. "My hair ain't dyed."
Monica screamed, bring a crowd into the room. Zander ran to the front and knelt in front of his mother. "What happened?"
"She hit her," Monica said, pointing to Rogue.
Mrs. Hayes took hold of Zander's hand. "She just attacked me," she said weakly. "It was completely unprovoked, I…"
"You lyin', manipulative, bitch," Rogue spat. "After the way you've been treatin' me, you're lucky all I did was hit ya."
"Rogue!" Zander snapped. "I can't believe you've done this. Apologize to her right now! It's the least you can do."
"No way in hell I'm apologizin' to her, Zander. I'm not sorry."
"What has gotten into you?" Zander asked. "This isn't like you at all."
"Yes it is," Rogue said. "And I'm sick an' tired of doin' what you want all the time. I don't wanna leave my friends, I don't wanna be your perfect little housewife, and I really don't wanna have to put up with that thing ya call a mother."
"What are you saying?"
"I’m sayin' that I don't want to do this anymore! This ain't me. Never has been, never will be. Find some other poor soul to put up with ya for the rest of her life." She took off her ring, threw it to the ground in front of him, and stormed off.
"Well," Bobby said after watching the scene, "looks like we have Rogue back."
*** *** ***
Rogue ran out of the building and took to the skies. She didn't need stability—she needed Remy. If she flew fast enough, she'd be at the mansion in minutes. As soon as she was there, she'd find Remy and confess to him that she still loved him—even if it led to rejection. She couldn't live the rest of her life without at least attempting to win Gambit back. She still loved him and knew she always would.
When she got to the mansion, Rogue found it dark and empty. "Remy?" she called. "Remy, are ya here?" She looked around, all the while calling his name. Rogue started to panic. He hadn't been at the engagement party, and Jubilee had said that he'd decided to stay alone at the mansion. So why wasn't he there?
She ran up the stairs to the living quarters, hoping maybe she'd find him in his room. She was on the way down the hall when she saw something beside her own door. There lay a single white rose with a note under it. She bent down and picked them up, reading the note.
Je t'aime tout le temps, ma chére.
"No," Rogue said, hoping the note and the rose didn't mean what she thought they did. He couldn't leave, not now when they were so close to being together. She ran down to the garage, hoping to find him there, but she was too late. His motorcycle was gone. Rogue felt a sense of defeat wash over her. It was over, and she had lost Remy forever.
*** *** ***
Rogue walked into the mansion and heard the phone ring. She darted over to it, wondering if maybe luck was on her side and it was Remy.
"Hello?"
Rogue's mouth grew dry and she didn't respond. "Hello, is anyone there?" the person on the other line of the phone repeated.
"Yeah, Zander, I'm here."
"Rogue, I have to talk to you. Please, darling, just hear me out."
Rogue sighed. "I'm listening."
*** *** ***
Eight months later…
Shreveport International Airport, Shreveport, Louisiana
Remy LeBeau cursed the inefficiency of airports. One would think that by the twenty-first century it would be possible for an aircraft to get from Point A to Point B without a million complications.
He'd been flying to New Orleans after spending some time on the West Coast when the pilot announced the current weather patterns over The Big Easy would make it difficult to land, and that they had to have an unexpected stop-over in Shreveport for an undetermined length of time.
Remy didn't want to be in Shreveport. He wanted to be home. Maybe he could make New Orleans feel that way again. Maybe he could find a place to be happy without Rogue.
"Remy?"
Gambit froze. He was hearing things. He looked up and decided he must be seeing things, too. There was no way Rogue was standing right in front of him.
"Hey, Remy."
"Rogue? Wha…what you doin' in Shreveport, Chére?"
"Zander was asked to a conference here to speak on how he's helped mutants control their powers. I agreed t'come so he could use my story as an example."
Zander…She was there because of Zander… Gambit sighed. He should've known she'd be married by then. "How's dat workin' out Rogue?" he asked.
"How's what workin' out? The conference?"
"Non. You an' Zander."
"We're not married, Gambit." She held up her left hand and wiggled her ring finger. It was bare. "See."
"What? Why not?"
"I didn't love him enough to marry him."
"But…but you came here f'him."
"As a friend and former patient, nothin' more."
"Oh."
"Remy, I came to the mansion lookin' for ya," she admitted. "At the engagement party, I realized I couldn't marry Zander, and that, well, that I still love you. But when I got there, you were gone…"
"I left because I couldn't stand watchin' ya wit' anot'er man." Rogue laughed. "What's so funny, Chére?"
"The irony." She paused for a moment, then asked, "So what are ya doin' in Shreveport, Remy?"
"I was on my way to N'walins when my plane got rerouted."
"Maybe it was fate."
"Fate?"
"Yeah, fate," Rogue said, looking him in the eyes. "Maybe we were meant t'meet in this airport. Maybe fate's givin' us another chance."
"I don' know about dat, Rogue," Gambit said. "Seems more like fate's been pushin' us apart. Did you know I could've been to de mansion de night 'fore you accepted Zander's proposal, but I decided to stop an' rest? An' you, gettin' to the mansion probably moments after I was gone. We keep jus' missin' de mark, Rogue."
"But we didn't miss it this time," she said. "We're both standin' here, in this airport. You're not even supposed t'be here, Remy, but ya are. And even if it wasn't fate, we're still here. How can we just walk away from each other this time? I know I can't turn my back on my feelings for you again."
"You sayin' you still love me, Rogue."
"Yes, Remy. I love you more than I ever believed it was possible to love another person."
"But what about everyt'ing we got between us? De problems we always had, de time since we last been toget'er? How do we deal wit' dat?"
"I was sorta thinkin' can just figure that out as we go."
Remy smiled. "So what happens now, Chére?"
"I think this is the part where you're supposed t'kiss me."
And that's exactly what he did.
*** *** ***
Gotta find a way
Yeah I can't wait another day
Ain't nothin' gonna change if we stay 'round here
Gotta do what it takes
'Cuz it's all in our hands
We all make mistakes
Yeah... but it's never too late to start again
Take another breath and say another prayer
And fly away from here
Anywhere yeah I don't care
We just fly away from here
Our hopes and dreams are out there somewhere
Won't let time pass us by
We just fly
If this life gets any harder now
It ain't no never mind
You got me by your side
And any time you want
Yeah we can catch a train and find a better place
Yeah... a cuz' we won't let nothin' or no one keep gettin' us down
Maybe you and I can pack our bags and hit the sky
And fly away from here
Anywhere yeah I don't care
We just fly away from here
Our hopes and dreams are out there somewhere
Won't let time pass us by
We just fly
Do you see a bluer sky now
You can have a better life now
Open your eyes
'Cuz no one here can ever stop us
They can try but we won't let them... no way
Maybe you and I
Can pack our bags and say goodbye
And fly away from here
Anywhere honey I don't care
We just fly away from here
Our hopes and dreams are out there somewhere
Fly away from here
Yeah... anywhere honey I don't I don't I don't care
Yeah... we just fly