Disclaimer: I don't own the X-Men, Shakespeare, or any
songs by Melissa Etheridge. Don't sue me, I'll cry. The few lines at the
beginning and end are from the song "No Souvenirs" by Melissa
Etheridge, which is on her album Brave and Crazy. The quotes late in the
story are from William Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet.
Rating: PG
Summary: Kitty decides whether or not she should be
with Lance. (Evolution 'Verse; semi-AU. Kitty POV) MAJOR ANGST WARNING!!!
Author's Note: This story is semi-AU, meaning it isn't
completely alternate universe, but it doesn't really go along with the show
completely either. Basically, it takes place after "Hex Factor," and
ignores anything that may come after it. (Which it sort of has to, seeing as at
this current time, the two part season finale has not yet aired.) Anyway, it
diverges from what is sure to be the path the show takes by having Lance leave
town following the battle in the mall between the Brotherhood and the X-Men. (I
just don't see the writers doing that…)
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Romeo Makes a Phone Call
to Juliet
By: Addie Logan
Hello, hello this is Romeo
Calling from a jackpot telephone
He didn't say what made him leave.
Maybe it had finally been too much from him. Maybe seeing child turn against
parent, follower against leader, lover against lover had been enough to
disillusion even the jaded.
Lover against lover.
I think that was what got to him
the most. It had to be—if it hit him at all the way it did me. Standing across from
him, a few feet and a million miles between us, and knowing. Knowing once and
for all that he was my enemy. My loyalties demanded that I turn a cold shoulder
to love, just like I knew in the back of mind might happen someday.
I never expected it to be that
hard.
The pain was even greater than that
of suffering my first real defeat. Looking across at him then, I wished I had
listened to him when he told me—begged me—to get out of there before things got
bad. Not because of the outcome of the battle. Difficult as it was, I could
face losing. No, I wish I'd left before I'd had to face the awful truth.
We weren't just Lance Alvers and
Kitty Pryde, two high school kids feeling the effects of first love.
We were Avalanche and Shadowcat.
We were soldiers.
We were enemies.
We were at war.
My only love sprung from my only
hate!
Too early seen unknown, and known too late!
Prodigious birth of love it is to me,
That I must love a loathed enemy.
The words sprung up into my mind,
and I could not push them away. I could taste them bitter, resting in my mouth,
wanting to be said, but I refused to let them be. I did not want to be Juliet,
dying for the first taste of young love. I'd always been more practical than
that. I'd always been reliable, steady, with a good head on my shoulders. Could
I risk it all for this? Could I go to Lance, offer up my love, only to risk
losing everything around me?
I wouldn't die for him. I knew
that. I don't know if he would die for me. And I wouldn't turn away from the
X-Men. Loyalty means more to me than romantic happiness.
I've never been sure where Lance's
loyalties lie. He left the Brotherhood once, and I hoped maybe that meant they
lay with me. Even after he'd left, I'd kept hoping.
It was that hope that kept me from
leaving Lance behind long ago. It lead me to grasp for time with him when I
could, never letting anyone know how much he meant to me, how close we were. I
kept hoping that he'd change his mind about our relationship, let everyone know
what he told me, late at night on the phone when no one else could hear, or in
those rare moments where we got to be alone. I'd even asked him to that silly
little school dance, hoping that if he went with me, and everyone saw us
together, then it would all be out in the open. Then, we could be together for
real.
I hated the secrecy, the denial,
the silence.
Romeo and Juliet hid their love
from the world.
It wasn't until after tragedy
struck that everyone knew how deep their love ran.
What I had with Lance became the most
real for me when I looked across and saw my enemy. How easy it had been for me
to walk into battle against the Brotherhood! Even when Lance had pleaded with
me to leave, I hadn't realized what was going on. The Brotherhood was our enemy
in name only—had been for a long time.
That wasn't the case anymore.
Mystique was back, and she had waged a war.
Suddenly, it all became painfully,
blindingly clear, and I understood what it was to be a "star-crossed
lover."
There was no glamour in that
phrase, no romance. It wasn't at all how they presented it in movies, in books,
in songs. It was real. So real.
Put a whole new spin on the phrase
"love your enemies."
But I didn't know where this love
would take me. Would it end up hurting me, or worse, one of my friends? Would
someone I love die the way Tybalt had died? Was love worth that?
Was anything worth that?
I wondered if Lance thought
somewhere around the same thing. He disappeared shortly after that battle. I
made myself to stop thinking about it. In the end, we were victorious, but the
Brotherhood was still comprised of our enemies.
If Lance came back, he'd still be
my enemy, too.
My only love sprung from my only
hate.
I didn't want that, and maybe he
didn't either. I convinced myself that's why he left. He didn't want to have to
face what it meant to love me and be against me at the same time.
I didn't expect to hear from him
again.
Time went by and I didn't. I filed
my memories of him away in the part of my heart marked "lost love,"
and went on with my life, convincing myself that someday the pangs I felt
whenever something evoked a vision of him in my mind would go away. For a while
I had myself convinced it had.
Then I heard his voice.
It was deeper, rougher than I remember.
The time since I'd last seen him had wrapped itself around the sound, making
him seem older as if weeks had become years. And he made such a simple request.
"Give me a reason to come
back."
One thought went through my mind.
For never was a story of more
woe
Than this of Juliet and her Romeo
I didn't want that. I didn't want
to be Juliet, and I didn't want Lance to be Romeo.
I didn't want us to end as a
tragedy.
So I gave him such a simple answer.
"I can't."
The line went dead, and I'm still
not sure if who it was that ended the call first.
I did the right thing.
I know I did the right thing.
You can't love your enemy, not like
that. It only ends badly, and there are already enough chances for pain like
that in my life.
I lay back on the bed, clutching
the cordless phone, wiping tears from my eyes, being thankful that I spared
myself from the pain that letting myself continue to love Lance would cause.
It was Lance's voice I heard in my
mind now, with mine always coming right behind, saying the words that I knew I
shouldn't want to take back.
Give me a reason to come back.
I can't.
Oh wait, wait I guess I'm
just too late
Oh you made up your mind
Love shouldn't be so hard…
***
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I'm thinking about making this a series with different short fics like this told from both Lance and Kitty's perspective, but I need reader input. Is it worth continuing like that? If you liked it or hated it either one, let me know!!!