|Forum|Articles|Planet of the Apes Review By Anubis   Well every movie this summer has been... in a word, bad. In this sea of AI's and Tomb Raiders, Planet of the Apes stands out, mainly because it neither sucks nor blows. Just go see it. Its the best thing to come out this summer. Wow that was an easy review. I suppose I should make more of an attempt. The plot. Anyone who has seen the original, or the parody of the original from the Simpsons, or for that matter has read the title of the movie, knows the plot already.Leo, the human, is a pilot on a space station that looks akin to the quad damage from Quake 3. He flies into a convenient temporal anomaly and crash lands on an alien planet. We all know it is the Planet of the Apes because.. well we can read the title. Leo, the human, is captured by some apes and taken to their city to be sold as a slave. The ape equivalent of a greenpeace"save the whales" human rights activist helps him and some other humans escape so Leo, the human, can get to a rescue party that the communicator from his crashed spaceship tells him is at some distant location on the planet. Leo, the human, and his consorts trek to this rescue party, braving dangers, perils, and a ten foot wide stream. Once arriving they discover that the rescue party was the crashed remains of Leo's Quake 3 quad damage space station. The evil ape army, that has been pursuing them for the entire movie, then catch up to them for the climatic battle scene, in which the humans and some slightly charred apes bludgeon each other for fifteen minutes. This version, like the original has a surprise ending, but unlike the original the ending is so weird and confusing that I am trying to block it out. The actors in this movie, unlike the other summer offerings, actually knew how to act. The ape characters in particular were very convincing, in the original the apes acted like humans wearing ape masks. In this one the apes actuary acted like apes, knuckle running and slapping the ground in a convincingly apelike manner. The evil General Thade was well acted, every thing he said and did was done in a sufficiently evil manner, there was no mistaking that his main motivation was to beat the living tar out of humans. Ari , the greenpeace human rights activist, was also sufficiently well acted, it was plainly clear that her primary motivation was to stop the evil General Thade from beating the living tar out of humans. Leo ,the human was also sufficiently acted, he did not care how much bludgeoning of humans was going on, he just wanted to get off the damm planet, and if some apes got bludgeoned in the process, all the better. There were some other humans in this movie but they were not important. sure the director tried to fit parts to them but they were there mainly to help Leo club apes at the end of the movie. In fact the move had dozens of other actors but most of them were not important. they were there mainly to serve as pawns in Leo's and General Thade's vast ,interlocking, mutually assured bludgeoning campaign. So in short go see this movie. I give it 4.5 out of five, they did everything they could have done without adding the Borg or Imperial star destroyers. If you need any more convincing it was directed by Tim Burton. Nuff said.       Syntax Error/:|Forum|Articles|