Epilogue: WoW (part 1)
I've had just about enough of this place. WoW is dying. It's dead. My stars have moved on, signed with other companies. My staff has been fired. The merchandising line has ground to a halt. The television programs are nolonger on the air. WoWtv was bought out by some home shopping network rip-off. The whole company's stock is worth shit now since our assets were liquidated. Hell, it won't be long now at all before the collection agencies even come hunting for yours truly. But that's not all--lucky me.
Remember Kathy? I wish I didn't. She's supposed to see me in court tomorrow with her new boyfriend...some hotshot high priced lawyer--sexual harassment she says! Can you believe that? My own secretary's stabbing me in the back now that things are falling apart! For all I know, she's probably in league with the damn collection agencies! Wouldn't surprise me the least bit. Like the rest of them, she's only out to get her piece of the pie now that it's going fast. All of them are out to get me. And I know just what'll happen if they do: good-bye limo, good-bye private jet, good-bye luxurious yacht, good-bye nice house, good-bye fancy clothes, good-bye everything. Just me and the shirt on my back, walking the streets or rotting in jail. Well, fuck that! I guess my time's come...oh well, there's no way around it now. Like this company, I too must make my final exit from the world's stage. But if I'm going out, I'm going out with a bang.
They can pry my money from my cold dead hands.
--WoW President James
Time is so so short. I hope to God this all works out. But if I know my luck, it probably won't. Ah well. I've still got to try. I'm not about to back out now that I'm having some doubts. This is go time. Now or never. I have no other choice. Either I get ripped apart by the collection agencies and that bitch Kathy, or I decide, right here and now my fate. I haven't lived a very long life, but I have no regrets. I'm not going to let this ruin me. I refuse to let someone else decide my life. It's mine to give, and it's mine to take, if I so choose.--Wait a minute, what am I thinking? This is crazy talk!...Isn't it?...I'm not so certain now. Shit! I'd better go ahead and get this done before I change my mind....
Maybe this is crazy...
Maybe I have gone off the deep end...
But there's no time to debate that now. Get busy living, or get busy dying. I've made my choice. But don't worry, I haven't forgotten the part I play. Even my death won't stop them. They'll keep on forever, unless someone finds a way to stop them in their tracks once and for all...
Forever...God, that's a long fucking time...I'm just now beginning to comprehend that.
I may be a greedy bastard--I certainly haven't contributed much to my fellow man--but I'll change that. Right here and now. By ridding the world of them, once and for all. I haven't forgotten my role as the key. When I go, it goes with me; I send them back to wherever the Hell they came from, then I lock the door and throw myself away.
But how do I bait them...
That's the 64 thousand dollar question, isn't it?
We fade in on the dimly lit interior of Zill Towers. The monster Necron and the madman Spatter are quickly making their way up the stairwell that leads to Prez James's office. We pick up on their conversation a few seconds later. Neither man looks to be in a pleasant mood.
"What? You're serious?"
"I never lie."
"...Called for us? Why?..."
"Whatever deal he plans to strike with us is irrelevant. The time for dealing is over. He will open the door, and he will open it now!"
"...And if he don't? What then?..."
"I'm sure you and your knife have plenty of ways to persuade him to change his mind."
"...Got me a score of 53. It should be higher. He'll smile. Grinning ear to ear. Just like me..."
"That's the spirit! If I know him well enough, he's going to try and stall as long as he can."
"...Mistake number one. First and last. Ever..."
"Exactly my point. If he even looks like he's going to try it, you do that wonderful little thing you do with your knife--Hell--do whatever your heart desires with him; but keep him ALIVE! The man's useless to Him if he's dead."
"...Old man's making his move? About time..."
"The good Reverend's had enough of that game, so he's made his move at last. Now victory is soon at hand, all we have to do is force the door open, once and for all."
"...Like the sound of that. No more sneaking around..."
"Absolutely. With the door wide open, nolonger will we have to slip in through the cracks and the crevices. Nolonger will we be rats scampering underneath the floorboards of the universe. Nolonger will we ever have to buy and bargain with those filthy monkeys to get what we want."
"...Good. Means we can get back to the good old days. Back to the fun. Got me a score of 53. Much too small. Gonna make it the greatest of all time! Just me and my knife. And these two miracle workers right here. So dirty. Gonna wash them clean though. Just you wait. Just you see. Wash them clean in a river of blood. Make the papers. All of 'em. No-one will ever forget--Door's locked."
The two monsters stop at the door to Prez James's office. Spatter rattles the doorknob and tugs at the door to no use. Prez James has obviously securely locked himself in his office. Necron's face contorts into a twisted sneer. He leans in close to the door, knocking. We cut to inside Prez James's office, listening to Necron's slightly muffled voice.
"Time's up Mr. President. No more stalling. No more deals. Either you open this door, right here and now...or I'll huff, and I'll puff, and I'll kick this damn thing open and eat you alive!"
Necron pounds angrily against the thick wooden door with his large pale grisly fist as he shouts a string of obscenities. We cut back to Prez James's office; no sign of him anywhere. Necron glances to Spatter with a wicked gleam in his eyes. His voice seethes with fury, anger drips from his every word.
"It looks like he's going to do this the hard way. Stalling until the very end...Break it down! And when we find him, cut off his fingers first. I want to watch him suffer!"
With a nod, Spatter backs away from the door a short distance. With a charge, he smashes into the door, busting it open. The numerous latches and chains snap from the sudden incredible force in a loud chorus of snapping metal. The two monsters stalk into Prez James's office, glancing around at the darkness. Moonlight filters in from outside, outlining Prez James's chair in a faint white glow. His chair is turned facing the window, it's back turned to the rest of his office. Necron starts across the room, headed for the chair, when suddenly the beep of an answering machine halts him dead in his tracks, though just for a second.
"No more stalling, no more dealing, no more anything Mr. President! The time has come to pay the price! You will open the door now, or Spatter here will start carving you up like a thanksgiving turkey! Do you hear me?..."
He is answered only with silence.
"Answer me!..."
And more silence. In a rage, Necron quickly rushes over to the desk, followed close behind by Spatter. He reaches across the desk, whirling the chair around angrily to reveal...
an answering machine? There's a post-it note attached that reads: "play me"
"...I don't know what kind of game you're playing monkey, but you're not going to win!"
He reaches down, pressing the play button All the while his cold glassy white eyes scour Prez James's office, trying to determine just where it is he's most likely hiding at. Spatter on the other hand is tearing the place apart looking for him, preferring the thrill of the hunt to cold calculations.
"I'm busy right now, leave a message at the sound of the beep."
*Beep*
"Well well well, look who's come hunting for me, eh? I figured you two would come after my call. You got this crazy notion in your heads that I'm just gonna bend over and let you guys fuck me over. But see, that's where you're wrong. I've already found a way to screw the IRS, the collection agencies, even my bitch secretary and her new hotshot lawyer boyfriend. And now? I found a way to screw you guys over too."
There is a momentary pause in the message, and both monsters' full attentions are on the message. Necron's face has twisted into a hideous scowl that stretches almost across his entire face. Spatter glares silently at the machine, his hand gripping his knife tighter and tighter. In short, they're mad as hell.
"Yeah, you thought I called you two up here to make one last deal, right? Hey, I'm just a monkey, right? I just called you boys up here to buy myself a little time, didn't I? You bet your ass I did! But I had a change of heart. I was going to go down, take the two of you with me--but where's the fun in that? Why waste myself, eh? Why do that, when I can do even better: make the world THINK I wasted myself and take you two freaks out in the process? I get the best of both worlds! And all it cost me was about 10 grand to hook the sprinkler systems up to a tanker truck full of gasoline and to buy some dynamite. See ya in Hell boys, have a nice trip! You got about ten seco-"
Necron turns, glancing at Spatter, Spatter turns, glancing back. The two monsters stare at one another for a moment--
And everything goes white.
A large explosion rocks the upper floors of Zill Towers, followed by a chain reaction of smaller explosions as flames roar out from the building and smoke billows up into the moonlight sky. Flaming debris and shattered glass rains down over the Zill Towers parking lot. It is the end for Worldwide Online Wrestling. Much like it started, so it ends: with a bang.
A battered old hearse slowly pulls up to the towering wreckage, coming to a stop. From out of the flames the two monsters emerge, their clothes smoldering and lightly smoking. Necron approaches the driver's-side door, and the blackened-out window of the old hearse slowly rolls down just enough to reveal a pair of glowing yellow slits in the darkness; the eyes of the dragon.
The scene fades out as the old battered hearse speeds off into the night taking Necron and Spatter with it.
To be continued...
