It had 5 hours of bloodshed, nuclear warfare, hostage situations, poodles, karaoke and frozen lemonade but still Angry Kitty and Doomboy were trying to send one another into the beyond. Doomboy was viciously trying to impale Kitty on a sculpted plastic mickey that he'd broken the ears off of. Kitty was beating him mercilessly with a stuffed Donald Duck she had filled with hundreds of game tokens. "Give up you *&%^$ bastard!!!" screeched Kitty. "Not until your intestines are strung on my christmas tree!!" Doomboy raged and walloped her with the shirtless mouse statue.
They began a gracefully violent duel with their respective disney character weapons. Doomboy's eyes glinted, determined not to be taken down by a stuffed duck who sounded like a dysfunctional german pygmy on crack. They lunged at each other striking and striking and striking again until both of their weapons locked (actually the sharp part of mickey's sawed off face was caught on the loose threads of donalds plush crotch) And they were at a standstill. They growled and sneered at each other, refusing to drop their weapons.
"You sniveling bitch."
"You're a %$8 %#*(wad who *&&## his mother and $@**^ #&&^!!!"
"You fight like a girl."
"Well what the $@%&& do you think I am **&&%boy?"
"I'm sure the guys you sleep with would certainly like to know that."
"%#@* ^$@(*& I can't %$#&&wait to rip your &&%## manhood off with a rusty tin can lid and watch
your corpse turn black with tetanus!"
"You won't be able to once I hack off your feet and watch as you are eaten slowly by flesh eating bacteria!"
They stared at each other, infuriated, eyes burning. "You skanky ho." "Dirty %%&#*."
Both suddenly dropped their weapons and a vicious liplock ensued, as well as feverish groping. "You set me on fire..." seethed Angry Kitty. "Ive been told that...." Doomboy whispered. "Talk to me dirty...tell me again about...tetanus." "Oh, yes! Tetanus, and...gangrene. Purple dripping flesh that smells like rotten meat..., oh, oh yes...TAKE ME!!!" The two fell to the ground, playing a righteous game of tonsil hockey and rolled into the pastel bushes strung with happy face mickey head lights, where loud smooching, unzipping and bloodcurdling passionate screams of various deadly infirmities were then heard.
3 hours later, the two emerged. The bushes were a smoldering pile of charcoal. Doomboy's face was covered with black lipstick, and deep gouges. Angry Kitty's vinyl skirt was shredded and the rusty railroad spike was still impaled through the side of it. Both were hand in hand, smiling. "Was it good for you?" Kitty purred. "Bubonic plague will never be the same again, you sexy bitch." and Doomboy leaned in to kiss her. "Whoa there, let's not over do it on the first date. We need to rest for a little bit, you animal."
"Promise to tell me about leprosy next time?" Doomboy panted. "That and more!" Kitty grinned wickedly. "Hey, Doom, what are you trying to hide in your hand over there?" "Oh, this? Oops. You're not supposed to see that. It's a surprise." Doomboy said trying to conceal a charred top of a grill and two barbecue forks. "OOooohhh. Foreplay!" Kitty said and slinked up against his side. "You're so bad! Lets go eat."
Raiyn and Gothicknight, who had been hiding in the shelter after the ensueing battle, had been silently composing their thoughts on paper. They glanced out the door, hearing the voices of their clanmates, and fearful of the tornado of terror that would soon spin back into the room. To their surprise, Doomboy and Angry Kitty were enjoying each others company...severely. They sat on a nearby picnic table, eating a large helping of cheese drowned mickey shaped fries. They watched in fixation and horror as Doomboy bit off the mickey ears and waited for Kitty to take the rest of the Mickey head from his mouth.
"How utterly disturbing." Gothicknight mused with glazed eyes. "They appear to have fallen in love." "Love is only pain...a black kind of pain..." sobbed Raiyn. "Yes, indeed. " answered Gothicknight. "It imprisons our souls, causing us excruciating suffering, leading us to forget ourselves and heap unrequited affection upon another who barely knows we exist in this dead space called life."
Raiyn looked up from her tear stained journal and moved closer to Gothicknight. "Yes...the pain is almost more that one can bear, with the heavy burden of existence crushing down upon you. It's like the void within extends into the outer blackness, bringing with it endless despair." Gothicknight suddenly looked Raiyn straight into her smeary eyes. "And the emptiness of the black despair is the disguise of love...for love is only torture and wreckless wanton satiation of that which can never truly be filled. Fie that love is so cruel." "Yes, so cruel and terrible," Raiyn whimpered, scooting closer. "For our hearts are fragile and break under the sweetness of love's embrace, so it is better to die alone, and embrace only the eternal dark than to surrender to the sweet tortures of cupid's divine arrow."
Gothicknight moved closer and stared down into Raiyn's face. "There's is only pain, exquisite, bleeding from my souls every orafice, as the angels above cry out in lamentation, for love will never touch me." Raiyn then carefully took his hand and breathed " Love is dead. We are dead. The blackness swallows us whole. We weep so we may feel at all, in our bitter cold graves we weep, forever." Gothicknight gripped her hands in his. "Forever, and loveless, we face naked our perpetual silence and sadness, forever."
The two began weeping bitterly and staring at each other in the throes of their beloved pain. Raiyn took a pair of razor blades from her secret compartment in her poetry book. Gothicknight sobbed in approval. Whilst Doomboy and Angry Kitty had slipped under the picnic table to play with a recently acquired pair of hot dog tongs and a pizza cutter.