Welcome to Happy Cute Land!!!

Goth is evil and black and full of nasty ugly things like death. Goths listen to loud, ugly music about mean scary things and it tells them to drink blood and kill cats and worship the dark lord of the universe. Goths like to eat children while they sleep, and collect human skeletons so they have bones to gnaw on and carve weird symbols into their arms. They torture animals with rusty pliers and electrified stereo equipment. They trip old ladies on the street and laugh when they fall down and get flattened by speeding garbage trucks driven by smelly, over weight men. They salt snails until they are steaming piles of oozing mucous, and step on puppies until their guts splurt out, and make seagulls explode, and poke holes in car tires and skin chipmunks with their bare teeth and wear the dripping skins like gore ridden badges of triumph as they go out to slaughter everything that lives and is HAPPY. Goths set things on fire, and explode things, and shoot people, and are the scourge of the universe because they are very very bad and they wear black and they like death and listen to yucky bad bad nasty music with spooky grindy noises. And they are always sad. Sad is bad. Happy is good. They should just be HAPPY all the time like everyone else! So don't be a Goth. You want to be HAPPY and smiling and cheerful just like everyone else, don't you? It's better to be HAPPY and cute here in HAPPY CUTE LAND. If you are HAPPY and make everyone else HAPPY then everyone will like you forever and ever and ever and all the duckies and puppies will be your friends! But if you wear black like Goths do, you'll be a bad person and no one will like you cuz they know you really are the spawn of Satan.

So, everybody smile! It's a great, wonderful day and everyone loves each other because we're all cute and HAPPY and no one ever makes fun of anyone else! YAY! Let's all clap our hands and think happy thoughts!!! HAPPY is love, and we love you here in HAPPY CUTE LAND! Have a peachy keen neato really swell day!!!!

WELCOME TO HAPPY CUTE LAND!!!!!

HUG EVERYTHING!



		WELCOME TO HAPPY CUTE LAND!!!!! Where everything is bright and cheerful and scrum-diddley-umptious! We're so HAPPY you could join us! Let's all do a gleeful dance of joy and sing HAPPY songs! Lalalalallaaalalaalalalalaaalla! Yes, gosh-golly-gee-whiz it sure is a bright, sunny day here in HAPPY CUTE LAND, where nothing is Goth. Goth is bad, boys and girls. And do you know why? Well, it's not HAPPY!!! It's not pink and fluffy and wide-eyed with child-like wonder like this bunny.

		Goth is evil and black and full of nasty ugly things like death. Goths listen to loud, ugly music about mean scary things and it tells them to drink blood and kill cats and worship the dark lord of the universe. Goths like to eat children while they sleep, and collect human skeletons so they have bones to gnaw on and carve weird symbols into their arms. They torture animals with rusty pliers and electrified stereo equipment. They trip old ladies on the street and laugh when they fall down and get flattened by speeding garbage trucks driven by smelly, over weight men. They salt snails until they are steaming piles of oozing mucous, and step on puppies until their guts splurt out, and make seagulls explode, and poke holes in car tires and skin chipmunks with their bare teeth and wear the dripping skins like gore ridden badges of triumph as they go out to slaughter everything that lives and is HAPPY. Goths set things on fire, and explode things, and shoot people, and are the scourge of the universe because they are very very bad and they wear black and they like death and listen to yucky bad bad nasty music with spooky grindy noises. And they are always sad. Sad is bad. Happy is good. They should just be HAPPY all the time like everyone else! So don't be a Goth. You want to be HAPPY and smiling and cheerful just like everyone else, don't you? It's better to be HAPPY and cute here in HAPPY CUTE LAND. If you are HAPPY and make everyone else HAPPY then everyone will like you forever and ever and ever and all the duckies and puppies will be your friends! But if you wear black like Goths do, you'll be a bad person and no one will like you cuz they know you really are the spawn of Satan. So, everybody smile! It's a great, wonderful day and everyone loves each other because we're all cute and HAPPY and no one ever makes fun of anyone else! YAY! Let's all clap our hands and think happy thoughts!!! HAPPY is love, and we love you here in HAPPY CUTE LAND! Have a peachy keen neato really swell day!!!!
			HUG EVERYTHING!