Fuffy T: Hi, Jesus. Welcome to my noos page.
Jesus Christ: Thank you, Fuffy. It's good to be here.
FT: Um, according to my sources, you are possibly the world's most famous Jew. I'm Jewish, too. How's that workin' out for you?
JC: Judaism is a wonderful faith and culture which I embraced in my earlier years. What it fails to address, however, is the loving nature of the Father, and I took it upon myself, as his son and all, to address those issues and get people to see the light, if you will.
FT: Yeah, I like lovin' too. I know you're into the whole good and bad thing, knowing which is which, right? So, tell me. What's good and what's bad?
JC: Like, what do you mean?
FT: Like tuna?
JC: Tuna's good. I like a good tuna sandwich.
FT: Yeah. I'm grey! What about hate?
JC: I'm not really big on hate. I think love is where the answer lies.
FT: This is a question that's been drivin' me nuts, lately. Your middle initial is H, right? What's that stand for?
JC: Well, I usually don't like to answer personal questions, but since you're just so cute, I'll tell you. The H is for Herman. I know, it sounds goofy. It was my step-dad's idea.
FT: What are your thoughts on the War on Terrorism we got goin' on?
JC: Well, being the only incarnation of God, I have to say I'm decidedly against it. That isn't to say that I approve of terrorism, of course. I find the slaughter of innocents to be an abomination to the Father. But I also believe that revenge is not the answer. Of course, officially, it's not revenge, but I've seen the hearts of these soldiers, and I know that it's what motivates them.
FT: If I sit on your lap, will you give me lovin'?
JC: Sure. I haven't stroked a kitty in a long time.
FT: Yeeeaaaah. Now, is it true that, um, your mom's a virgin?
JC: That's really something you should take up with her, but...
FT: I know it's not something you wanna talk about, but it's a portant issue with a lot of people, so I gotta ask.
JC: Well, it's a confusing matter. I'll give you that. So, I'll tell you this: Much of the confusion stems from Catholicism, when the Pope decreed that Mom was a virgin until she left this world. But, and this is important, but while it is true that I was conceived without her knowing a man, it is a documented fact that she and Joseph were married, and I did have siblings. The thing is there's still this negative vibe when it comes to sex. What people don't understand is that sex is a wonderful and necessary thing for the human race. Granted I've never been with a woman, but I'm not married. Sex is only wrong if you're not married to the person. Otherwise, there is no sin in it.
FT: Well, that looks like about all the time we have. Thanks for coming by, Jesus.
JC: My pleasure.
