Mr Gosney, who was not at the restaurant at the time, said he understood they arrived from somewhere around Howick in a taxi with no money to pay the fare and gave the driver a watch instead.

They were seated in a tucked-away part of the restaurant and staff became suspicious of their ages only after they tried to buy an inordinate number of cigarettes.

Two of the girls' fathers arrived, one of whom eventually settled the bill after the other objected to paying for the alcohol component and expressed irritation at being called out at such a late hour.

well fuck me stupid, Daddy Warbucks-- so sorry you had to drag yourself away from Brideshead Revisited and come take control of your errant little prosti-tots.

if i were the restaurant owner, i'd be suing the parents for the lost revenue-- AFTER i beat the living shit out of and FIRED the waiter who served the kinderwhores. good thing i'm not a restaurant owner, i guess.

(or a parent, because i'd have the little bitches locked in a closet while they tried to decide whether they wanted to be beaten with the leather belt buckle-side-up or a bar of soap in a sock. but, you know, discipline is so 800 years ago.)

"she looked older" and "they had on makeup" my ass. fucking hell, i get carded at rated R movies, and i'm usually old enough to be the ticket-seller's goddamn mother.

[EDIT] 10:52pm wow, that article really put a bee in my bonnet.

it's that time again. i have to take a valium and go to the stupidmarket.

let it be known i have 0% sympathy for Roy Horn, but goddamn, PETA has got some brass fucking balls.

i've never been fond of PETA, ever since my mother told me she had a fur coat in the 70's and the PETA-people dumped gasoline all over it and tried to set it on fire. WHILE SHE WAS IN IT.

enough doom and gloom. let's get back to the rapier wit that defines this webpage. as in: the smartest thing to come out of Jessica Simpson's mouth might very well be Nick Lachey's penis. *rimshot*

i was watching this Discovery Channel program about sharks this morning (yeah, another one) and some marine biologist/shark expert/whatever guy said: "after a shark attack occurs, it is our responsibility to find out why the shark was in the area."

gee, it couldn't possibly have anything to do with the fact that the shark lives there, and can swim wherever they bloody want. if you're the sort of person who needs to die without any scars, then just don't go in the damn water, period. good fences make good neighbors.

trend alert: bored white, upper middle class kids forming violent gangs. of course they Weren't Raised That Way™, and "would never do such a thing". and of course their parents had no idea they had Nazi tattoos. oh, absolutely no idea at all!

check out these cool webcams from the Albuquerque International Balloon Fiesta. daybreak pics are the best. the cat and i were up watching the balloons all morning from our balcony.

for those of you who prefer your photography from a more professional angle, there are some gorgeous fiesta galleries here.