Chapter Eight: Help Me, I’m Suffocating in Here…

 

            *“Where are we going for drinks?” Shade asked Hiiro as they blindly walked down the busy city street. They were downtown New York City, and the neon night lights were blinking and blaring away. The streets’ traffic was calming down and there were more people walking now. Cafés were bustling to serve dozens of folks eating dinner or having coffee. So far they had seen the city that never slept was living up to it’s name. Beneath the self reliance and fatalism that seemed inherent to every New Yorker, Gotham was still only a mere speck, a tiny fly trapped in the greater scheme of life’s web. They passed many bars, yet all seemed to be too filled for their liking. They were a couple that preferred quiet in a crowd.

            “There’s a bar around the corner. We can go there.” He said, remembering what little information he knew about the layout of downtown New York City. He had only been to the city once before, and it seemed like years ago.

            “Fine.” She muttered in response. Why had she agreed to this? What foolhardy thoughts had she been thinking that had allowed her mouth to speak the word ‘yes’. She was going to have to remind herself to strike that word from her vocabulary. Still… could be worse. She eyed Hiiro slightly. At least he was more of the silent type who wouldn’t expect her to speak much to him. The couple rounded the corner and just as Hiiro had predicted a bar came into sight. They entered the tiny establishment and took seats at a table that had a view of the street.

            “What do you want?” A waiter gruffly asked them.

            “Just a beer.” Shade told him without looking up.

            “Same.” Hiiro ordered. If he wasn’t careful he would end up recreating his dream. That would not be good.

            “Why did you pick beer?” Shade asked him. He looked at her, only to find her eyes were glued to her hands on the table. No expression was readable on her lowered face.

            “Because it makes me the least drunk.” He smirked. She gave a short laugh.

            “True, true.” The beers came and they sat in silence once again. It wasn’t a bad silence though. All in all, it was rather amiable. Almost too amiable. Shade needed to find a way to fix the silence, to stir up the relaxed feeling she wasn’t used to feeling. And she had just the question to do it.

            “Why did you swear your loyalties to Darien? We both know you didn’t mean it.” She threw at him. Hiiro groped for a good answer and found he could think of none.

            “I don’t know.” He told her, picking his words carefully. Not too much information, just enough, but not too much. It wouldn’t do to have his most deadly enemy finding out about the true nature of his reasons to join the Specters.

            “You must. You hate him. During his speech I saw your eyes light up in contempt. It must have been a heavy surge of emotion for your normally stoic face to change so much.” She smirked. “Your face was practically purple. So why do you lead him to believe you’re fighting on his side?”

            “Darien dilutes everything I fought for.” Hiiro responded quietly; forgetting to check his answer.

            “ Diluting everything you fought for? And when exactly did you fight and for what?” She smirked.

            “Makes no difference.” He recovered quickly. “Even now, today, and yesterday, when I fought you, we were fighting for something. Do you know why we fought?”

            “I know why I fought. I fought to get a feel for how well you could fight.” She spat. All be damned if he was going to turn this into a ‘lesson’ for her.

            “I fought you for my pride and honor.” Hiiro said quietly. Shade gave an inaudible gasp. Not what she had been expecting. He continued. “I fought to try to defeat you, my enemy, and I fought you because I wanted to. Not because I was ordered to.”

            “Do you think I was ordered to fight you?” Shade sneered. “I fought you of my own free will.”

            “And how often do you fight on your own free will?” Hiiro threw out.

            “Whenever.” She replied haughtily.

            “Really? Is that so? Then why do you do the dirty work for Darien? You think you owe him something?”

            “I owe him my life. Let me tell you about the little girl who you’re having a ‘drink’ with. I was seven when my dad died. My mom had died a year before that. I was thrown onto the streets and lived there until I was ten when Darien found me lying in a gutter half starved and freezing cold. He nursed me back to health, he gave me a decent home. No rules except fight for him. A good deal if you ask me”

            “And you think you owe him something? I was picked up off the streets too. When I was seven. And I was trained and beaten. And I still work for the same man who beat me. But I do it out of respect. I do it because I agree with his moral concepts, I do it because I help others who were like me.”

            “And Darien is no different! He makes me fight to help others like me!”

            “Darien makes you fight because he knows he can. I work for the man who saved my life, yes. But I don’t owe him anything. He did what he was obligated to do as another human being. Obligated. Yes. It is our obligation to take care of those weaker than us. That was what our Eve Wars were fought over. It wasn’t just peace, it was an obligation to stop people like OZ or the Alliance or the Romafeller Foundation or the Barton Foundation from altering our lifestyles so that even more of our kind, the lost, had to be created. In winning the war we also gained the obligation to respect others as humans. It is our job to help those down on their luck. What Darien is asking for is lunacy.” Hiiro finished. He had worked himself into a cool rage. His voice remained the same low pitch as it had been before, yet his face had become animated and his eyes gleamed with a sparkle of passion.

            Shade listened to Hiiro first with a closed mind. She thought she was right, and that was that. But as Hiiro’s speech went on, she became genuinely interested in what Hiiro had to say. He really cared about what he was saying, he truly had a deep seeded belief in it. Never before had she seen a person so livid and passionate yet so clam and collected over something. Could it be that she didn’t owe Darien anything for saving her life; that in fact he owed her more than that? It was an interesting new thought. And if it was true, then she would be free. Finally free.

            Hiiro was worried he had said too much, that he had given himself away, but he couldn’t help it. What Darien subjected his gang members was despicable. It was like slavery, only with children. And it was a dirty slavery too. Darien made his gang members steal, shoplift, rob banks, fight, launder money, vandalize, ad more. And these were teens doing it. Darien allowed them to drink and smoke, not to mention do countless other drugs and permanently damage their systems. He didn’t care, so long as he got his share at the end of the day, he didn’t care.

            “What you are suggesting is that Darien is evil, is this correct?” Shade  finally asked.

            “What I am saying is that he is leading you down a path of self destruction. And if you continue this path, you will find it is not as glorious as he makes it.”

            “It is not glorious.” She insisted quietly. “Do you think I believe fighting and killing is glamorous? Do you think I agree with the stealing?”

            “I think you do not know. You are Darien’s pet, a mere toy in his eyes. You do his bidding and he rewards you with extras beyond belief. Time off, luxuries. The other members of your club do not receive the same attention.”

            “I worked harder than hard to get where I am now! Do you think everything should be handed to those people who do not try as hard on a sliver platter?” She countered.

            “No. But you don’t think those people work just as hard as you? Look at me. I’ve been in this ‘clan’, this ‘family’ as you refer to it, for three weeks now. And I already have more privileges than most others. Why? Because I’m good at something. I worked just as hard as all the other members of your family, only I did it outside of your club. Now I come in and am immediately granted a higher status. If you were one of them, would that seem fair?” Hiiro explained. How could he make her see his point without telling her who, what, he truly was?

            “No, it wouldn’t seem fair, but you too have to understand. They know when the best is the best. And you are the best.” She reasoned. Hiiro shook his head.

            “No. They don’t know that I’m the best. You don’t know that I’m the best.”

            “I couldn’t beat you, and I’m the best.” She told him.

            “And I didn’t defeat you, and I’m the best.” He offset her.

            “Then we’re both the best. I’m the Perfect Mercenary. I am the best. What are you?” She leaned in close, as if the get a better look at him. Hiiro felt as if her bitter arctic blue eyes were searing through him, reading the very core of his being, his damned soul.

            “I am” he paused. “I am the Perfect Soldier.” He whispered. He dropped his eyes and they fell to her hands. They were gripping to the beer bottle so tightly her knuckles were white. Gently lifting his own hands, he moved them closer until they were resting over hers.

She gasped in shock. His hands were so cold. Much like her own. Were they both that hardhearted? Still. It wasn’t only the astonishment of the icy grip that now encompassed her tiny callused hands, but a jolt of invented electricity that had jumped from his hands to hers and ran it’s course through her spine that shocked her. How could one person give rise to such an odd feeling? Her mind was muddled not from the few sips of alcohol, but from the unfamiliar feelings that surged through every nerve in her mind and body. Her hands, arms, ached to reach out and touch the boy whose life and attitude mirrored her own in so many ways.

Hiiro too, was lost in thought. His chest felt heavy and his breaths of air were not coming as easily as he would have liked them to. He could feel his heartbeat rise and adrenaline begin to pump overtime the way it did when the ZERO system initiated itself. Mass confusion spread through his brain and his logic and reason were shot to hell. Whatever he had once thought of emotions being weak was overridden and the pent up release set him into overdrive one hundred fold. Her hands were just as chilled as his, and the lack of warmth shot a small dull pain through his fallen heart. There they sat until Shade spoke.

“Perfection comes at a price. I gave away my past and name. What have you sacrificed for your perfection?” The question was quiet and fell softly upon his hard ears.

“I gave my humanity away.”

“ Humanity cannot be stripped from a person by another. Only you are responsible for locking your emotions away.” She articulated for him. His head shot up and her eyes met stormy blood shot ones.

“You’re wrong.” He grunted brokenly. “I was beaten and trained until I forgot what compassion and kindness were. That is the loss of humanity.”

            “Hiiro Yui is still an unusual name.” He had to smile. Not smirk, but smile. She was an odd one, this one.

            “As is Shade.”

            “I wasn’t always Shade. Darien ordered Shin to rename me because me real name was too nice for his tastes. I’ve been Shade since I was ten.”

            “And your name before Shade?” He asked.

            “Will remain mine and mine alone.” She smirked.

            “I once knew a man. He had no name.” Hiiro muttered. Why was he doing this?

            “Oh? What did others refer to him as then?” Shade looked up, surprised.

            “No Name. They called him No Name.”

            “A name defines who you are. If he was No Name, then was he nothing?” Shade asked, very innocently confused.

            “You define your name. In his case, he was a pilot, and a damn fine one. Names make little difference when you are like him, or me, or even you. Hiiro Yui isn’t my real name. I don’t know mine. Just as he, I stole my name from another. But I make the man who is called Hiiro Yui, the name did not make me. I came first, I will stay last.”

            “How do you know this?” She asked, tears forming in her eyes. Never before had she met someone so clairvoyant as Hiiro Yui. He saw things she had never imagined existed. He was opening her eyes to ideals and dreams far beyond an imagination she had ever allowed herself to fall into. And he explained it all with such grace and ease that he made it all so simple. She hadn’t cried since her father had died. Now the tears of old were ready to spill over her crystalline orbs and drip down her porcelain cheeks. How had he broke every barrier she had put up?

            “I don’t. I only assume.” He answered. This was getting personal. How could he have let this come about? Damn emotional weakness. He was getting drawn into something he was not prepared for in any way, shape, or form. Shade was beginning to do something to him he couldn’t explain. She was opening his heart layer by layer. Soon she would be at the core, she would know everything. Was he ready? No. She was a distraction to his mission. He had to rid himself of her before she caused him more stress than she already was. He pulled his gun.

            “I’m going to kill you.” He whispered venomously. She still sat, passive and stoic as ever in front of him. Her glassed over eyes shined more than he had ever seen them do before.

            “Are you? And then are you to go after Darien and Shin?” She smirked and gave a short laugh through her teary eyes. She understood perfectly well what he was doing. She had been tempted to do it many times to him before this meeting at the bar.

            “Yes. You are evil. I will destroy all evils.” He replied with as much hatred as he could in his voice. She didn’t seem very phased.

            “If I am an evil in this world, please kill me. I have fought against evil, or at least thought I was fighting against evil. But if I am the true evil plaguing this world, please, kill me now before I cause more chaos.”

            “I will.” An old fashioned stand off was in order, yet it was not. His gun lowered, as did his head. “I will not.”

            “Why not. I am evil, am I not?” She asked confused. She had really thought he would kill her.

            “You are not evil. Darien is evil. You are mislead.” He answered carelessly.

            “Fine. Leave me alive. But I warn you Hiiro Yui. If you try to kill Darien, you will end up facing me first.” Her words rang with a resounding echo of determination. It stung to hear them, but so be it. He placed his gun back in its holster and stood. Before walking out of room, he turned back to her. Leaning down, he roughly grabbed her chin and turned her head to face him.

            “Your challenge will not be forgotten.” He muttered, his lips brushing against hers. He moved his head down slightly farther and his lips made full contact with hers. Brutally slamming his lips against her soft full ones in a passionate display of hidden emotions, he tasted her for only a few seconds. Then he released her and walked out of the bar, leaving her to her own stunned and sinful thoughts.*

 

~~~ QUESTION: Was this in character enough? Was it sweet or did I ramble too much?