Epilogue: The Eternity of Haze

*“Legolas.” She gulped.

“I see you’ve made it through the fight.” His face was grim. She didn’t like this. Not one bit. Was he angry with her?

“Yes. I-”

“I’m glad. Well, I suppose it’s ended. We have defeated the orcs.” He cut her off. Now she knew he was up to something.

“Yes, I suppose we have. Legolas, I…”

“Please, don’t speak.” He held up his hand. “You gave a wonderful speech. Serein. And the elves have begun to come back to life. They were so dead when we first came. You have changed them. And you have changed me. I know you will never admit to me how you truly feel. I know that now. You are so wrapped up with your kingdom, your people, that you will never be able to fully give yourself to anyone, not even me. While I watched your speech I realized it.” He hung his head. Legolas felt like a failure. She had asked him to stay, and he had promised to, no matter what. But here he was, running away. But he knew, at the same time, his actions were justified. He had to go through with it. “So, I will do as you asked of me before the fight began. I will leave you, leave Haze. That is the only thing left.”

“Legolas!” She stood, suddenly afraid. What was he saying? Did he mean it? No, he wouldn’t… he couldn’t! Not now!

“No, Serein. I love you.” He raised a hand to cup her cheek. His thumb brushed away a tear as it slipped from the corner of her eye. “I only came to tell you that. I ride now, away from here, for I fear that I could not stay and allow myself to be tempted by you any longer without giving in. But it would ultimately destroy us. So I give you my leave, Queen Serein. Mat Valor smile upon you.” He backed away. Giving a deep bow to her, he then turned and began walking away, head held high.

All work in the main hall had stopped as all of the elves watched the scene playing out before their eyes. When Legolas reached the main doors, he turned around to look at the woman he loved one last time. “Good bye Serein. I love you.” One more bow, and he was gone.

Serein gave something of a strangled cry. She collapsed onto the stairs of the alter and clutched at her heart for a moment. Bowing her head, she rocked sided to side. Finally, taking a deep breath, she rose to her full height and raised her head. Proudly, she stood and walked down from the throne alter towards the hall that held her bedchambers. She would cry there. Never in front of her people. Her own pride made her sick.

>>>)(<<<

“Then you truly mean to leave her?” Lakner asked in shock as he stood near Legolas.

“There is nothing more I can do. I will honor her wishes and leave. As much as I love her, she believes in her heart that it will never work. And unless she truly believed that it would work, then she is right, it would fail.”

“But to leave her? She’ll be heart broken.”

“Maybe. But she will live.”

“You will be heart broken.”

“I will. And I will never love again. Not as I love her. Not as deeply, and never will anyone, ever, replace her.”

“My boy, you are wrong.” Minder came up behind them. “She will not get over it. Serein loves far too deeply to forget. She will pretend nothing ever happened. She will act. She will become quiet and withdrawn. She will not eat, not sleep. She will wane away without you. And you leave her anyway.”

“Serein loves deeply, this is true. But how deep can her love for me possibly be if she will not speak of it?”

“How deep can your love been for her if you leave her because of that reason?”

“Deep. Deep because I have the best intentions on leaving- the intention of helping her. At least if I leave, she will have been taught a lesson in humility. And she will be able to love more freely in the future because of it.”

“You are wrong, so very wrong.” Minder shook his head sadly. Legolas mounted his horse and gave one last nod to both Minder and Lakner.

“I wish I was. Tell Lathner I said good-bye as well.” He spoke low. With that, he urged his horse to go.

Serein watched from her window as Legolas, the elf she loved, rode away from her, never to be seen again.

>>>)(<<<

“Queen Serein? Shall we have the two who were arguing come here for a decision by you then?”

“Yes. I will decide if you wish me to.” The elf looked sharply at his Queen. She was not the same elfin woman she had been when she had first returned three weeks ago. Only three weeks, and yet such a drastic change. All had seen it, but few spoke of it. It was frightening.

Their small kingdom had begun to thrive again. Business was good. Food was plentiful once more. People had been on better behavior, the army had begun to rebuild itself in both strength and skill. It even seemed that at times the haze had returned to Haze. The palace of Haze had been under construction for two weeks, and the restoration was nearly complete. And no trace of Nero could be found. He had apparently gone into exile after trying to loot the royal treasuries and being thrown out in front of a large crowd. Everyone rejoiced at the thought.

But their Queen herself had begun to deteriorate after the orc battle. She was rarely seen eating, even at the grand feasts she held. Her weight was becoming a concern for the palace chefs. Smiles now were rare, and the sense of humor she had displayed was non-existent. Aside from her loss in humor, she had also lost her energy. Most days she sat on the steps to the throne, not moving much. She refused to sit in the throne chairs, saying they had been tainted with a vile evil she wanted no part of, a vile evil called pride.

Her appearance was not much better. Her thinning figure seemed to be swallowed in the heavy blue cloak she always wore, even when it was incredibly warm outside. Her eyes were sunken, and never seemed to sparkle as they had before. Heavy bags under them told the story that she was not sleeping, and her skin was ashen with a sallow tinge that made people believe she was possibly very sick. Some even claimed they had heard her throwing up or crying. But no one could say whether the rumors were true or simply false.

As Serein sat, unaware her health was the worry of each of her subjects, she let the events of the past few months play over and over in her mind. She constantly thought of the Fellowship. Her friends, the short ones. Gimli, master dwarf. Gandalf, the chauvinistic wizard whom she had finally come to gain the respect of. Aragorn, the new King of Gondor. He would make a fine ruler indeed. He had a level head, good heart, and knew his people well. She thought of her Uncle Elrond, and how he seemed almost the same, but slightly different, somehow aged though he was immortal.

The one thing she thought the most over, however, was Legolas. She had been such a blind fool! Why hadn’t she seen it? Why had she treated him so wrongly? So horribly? She should have told him, confessed. He would have found a way to keep them together. She should have made him stay, kept him here, with her. She should have apologized, should have done something! But she hadn’t. Valor, she hadn’t. And now she was so lost… without him she could not rule. She could barely even drag herself out of bed each morning. It took all the strength she had to simply speak a sentence. Then she was drained. He had been her strength, her source of energy and power. Without him, she was nothing, had nothing, could do nothing.

“Serein.” She looked up tiredly.

“Hello Minder. Can I help you?”

“Will you eat? That would help me a great deal.”

“I am not hungry, I am sorry.” She told him, hanging her head once more.

“Serein! Stop this foolish behavior! I knew something like this would happen. I told him.”

“Told who what?” She asked tiredly. It was hard for her to think straight enough to follow along with what he was saying. Minder’s head shot up.

“I told Legolas this would happen when he left.” He watched Serein’s head shoot up.

“What did you tell him would happen?”

“I told him you would begin to waste away to nothing without him. And he said that it was for the better, because you believed it would never work, and without the belief that it would work, it truly would fail, and then you would be hurt more than you are now.”

“He said that?” Her head dropped once more. She had been so thoughtless. She would give anything to see him just once more, but it would never happen. He would never return. She had driven him away. She had driven away the one she loved. Her self-loathing skyrocketed.

“Serein. He loves you.” Minder said.

“I know. And I loved him. I can admit to it now, when he is not here, when I have had to love with my mistake. But when I see him I will be a hypocrite once more and say the opposite. Such a fool I am!”

“Serein, I said he loves you, not he loved you. He still cares, just as you do.”

“He still cares?” She asked surprised and somewhat skeptical.

“Yes, still. If you will pardon me, my Queen, I must take my leave of you.”

“Of course. Thank you, my dear old friend.”

“Anything for you, my Queen.” He smiled.

“Minder.” She spoke once again as he walked away. “Watch over them while I’m gone?”

“As you wish.”

“Thank you.” She nodded, and he walked on. She stood from her place, and began walking to her room. When she reached it, she sat on her bed for a moment, then stood. She had work to be done.

>>>)(<<<

“Elrond, good friend, I do believe we have over stayed our welcome.”

“Thranduil, you can never outstay your welcome, for it is so rare that you visit.” The two elfin men smiled good-naturedly at each other. “And of course, I can never thank you enough for your help in the second War of the Ring.” Elrond added.

“My help? It was the elfin race as a whole that helped.” Thranduil corrected.

“Well then, at least let me give credit to you, Legolas, for being part of the Fellowship, protecting our ring barer, and going so far to help as you did.”

“The honor was mine, I assure you, Lord Elrond.” Legolas bowed his head out of respect.

“Will either of you accepted any compliments?” Elrond laughed. “Then thank you for helping my niece, wherever she may be, in saving her kingdom and protecting her as you did.”

“You are welcome.” Legolas replied rather stiffly. Thranduil and Elrond looked hard at him. Though Legolas had spoken of Haze and the battle with the orcs, he had left out great details of everything that had happened in-between. To both elves it was obvious something monumental had occurred between Legolas and Serein, but he would not speak on the subject. And whenever her name was mentioned, he became cold and distant.

Legolas himself had gone through a period that seemed as if he were in mourning. Every day for the first three days or so he had gotten up and moped around. He had not eaten much, and he often wandered around in a dazed state, alone and quiet. But he had grown out of it with the last couple of weeks.

Thranduil hadn’t wished to stay so long in Rivendell, but with Legolas’ actions, he had not wanted to push his son before he was ready. So they had over stayed the time they had originally supposed to. But Legolas had no knowledge of this.

“Lord Elrond!” An elf ran up to them. “You have a visitor.” A cloaked figure stepped into the courtyard they were standing in. Dropping their hood, the other simply stood and stared.

“Hello Uncle Elrond. I hope I have not come at an inconvenient time.”

“Serein!” He breathed. “No, not at all. Welcome. I believe you remember Lord Thranduil of Mirkwood?”

“Of course, I’m sorry. Hello Lord Thranduil.” She paused. “Legolas.” They stood in silence. It was obvious to both Elrond and Thranduil that Serein was there for only one reason: to see Legolas.

“Serein.” Legolas nodded. What was she doing here? She was supposed to be in Haze right now, far away from him. She was supposed to have left his thoughts, he was supposed to forget her.

“Legolas, I, I…” She trailed off. She had come all this way, but she knew not what to say now that she was faced with her task.

“Shouldn’t you be in Haze?” He finally asked.

“Minder is… watching things for me.” She answered as if she were in a daze.

“Oh.” He drank in the sight of her. She was so beautiful. But had she lost weight? And she was so pale, and her eyes… “Serein, are you feeling well?” He asked concerned.

“Fine.” He could see her visibly pale, if it was possible. She was so deathly pale he was ready to believe she was a corpse.

“Serein. You’re sick.”

“No.” She denied.

“When was the last time you ate?”

“I cannot remember.”

“When did you last sleep?”

“All of my dreams have been nightmares. I cannot sleep.”

“Serein…” By now they stood inches from each other. He gently reached out and traced her jaw line with his thumb. “Nightmares?”

“Hmm.” She bit her lip. The taste of the coppery tinge of blood finally alerted her to pain and the fact that she was biting too hard.

“Why are you here?” He finally asked.

“I could not go on any longer there. Legolas, why did you leave me? I…I… Valor. I cannot do anything without you. You were my reason for getting up in the morning, my reason for trying so hard.”

“Your reason for trying? Serein, tell me you at least tried to eat!” When she bowed her head in shame, his eyes widened. “You stopped eating without me there?” He asked, half shocked and very concerned. He had left three weeks ago. That meant she hadn’t eaten in three weeks. Minder had been right…

“I had no reason to eat without you there. I simply haven’t been hungry. But Legolas, I…”

“Serein! Do you have any idea how dangerous that is? You could have starved yourself to death! Serein!” He suddenly pulled her into his arms and hugged her. She buried her head in his chest and began to cry.

“I’m sorry. I am. But I just couldn’t… without you, I, I just couldn’t. I tried so hard. But I need you. I need you to be with me. I’m so sorry, so sorry.” She rambled on.

“It’s alright. Everything will be alright.” He hugged her.

“I love you.” She whispered. He pushed her back and looked her in the eye.

“Do you?” His eyes shone with so much hope.

“I do. I love you, so much.” He pulled her into a hug again, rocking her and cradling her in his warm arms.

“I love you too Serein. Everything will be alright now. I promise. Trust me, everything will be alright.”

“I trust you.” They stood like that for some time, just holding onto each other. Then he lifted her chin and claimed her lips with his own. As he gently pressed against her lips, she responded instantly. Their blood boiled as the passion they had kept pent up for so long was finally released. She pulled away, gently pecking his lips. Then she kissed his cheek, and trailed tiny butterfly kisses down his jaw line. With one final kiss on his neck, he moaned and sought her lips again.

An ecstasy neither of them had ever felt before invaded their senses and clouded their minds. All they cared for, all they knew, all they were aware of was each other and their emotions. Breaking their kiss, they rested their foreheads against each other’s and breathed deeply. Then he embraced her again and held her tightly in his strong arms. He would never lose her, never let her go. He loved her, and she him.

“Thranduil. As children we grew up like brothers. But now it looks like we may become family by blood as well.” Elrond clapped Thranduil’s shoulder as they watched their niece and son together.

>>>)(<<<

“So then you’ve decided to go back to Haze for good Legolas?” Elrond asked.

“Yes. Serein cannot leave her people, and my father has no intention of giving up his title for a quite a while. But we are going to deal with that when it happens.”

“And will there be a wedding?” Thranduil smirked at the couple.

“It won’t be for another year.” Serein smiled. “We’ve decided there’s no rush.”

“But eventually we want a family. I wouldn’t mind getting started right now, but as you can see, we aren’t really in the position to…”

“Legolas!” Serein smacked his arm and blushed bright pink. They were sitting on her horse, Serein behind Legolas. Beside them on the ground were Elrond and Thranduil.

“I am not apologizing, because I am not sorry.” He smirked.

“You will be when I get off this horse and have a sword in my hand.”

“Touchy, isn’t she?” He couldn’t resist the jab.

“You’re a horrible elf! I hate you!” She pouted.

“No you don’t. You told me just the opposite this morning.” He began to laugh, and soon she joined in. Hugging him from behind, she lay her head on his back.

“You’re right. I do love you.”

“And I hope to hear that very often dear.”

“You two are going to be a wonderful married couple.” Thranduil laughed.

“And we shall live for eternity, madly in love with each other and blissfully content, just as it was ordained in the stars the very day we were born.” They smiled at each other. All the world had been set right, all it had taken was a small walk in to the fire for love.*

~~~I’m DONE! I’m done! Yeah! So??? How was it? Huh? Yes, the ending line was cheesy, but hey, I felt like being a sentimental freak! REVIEW!!!!!! (That way I’ll know whether you want me to write another fic or not)~~~ -Vixen