The ladies' room has a line that would have done justice to a ticket seller's window in KISS's heyday. I might be able to bullshit my way to the front, but I've always hated line jumpers. However, the situation is becoming desperate. You only rent alcohol, you don't own it, and it is time to return some to the natural cycle.

I mentally review options. Not a whole hell of a lot. There isn't even a nearby gas station, even if I thought that I could make it that far. I snag Tinkerbelle as she trots past with a tray of drinks. "Tink, is there another comfort facility somewhere around here, maybe employee's? I'm pretty desperate here."

"Sure, Scribe." She points to a dimly seen hallway tucked over in a far corner. "Down to the end and cut a right."

I give her a quick kiss on the cheek which sends her into blushing giggles. "Thank you, lifesaver."

I worm my way through the crowd toward the hall. It's dimly lit. There's a door to the right that leads outside, and another to the left that probably leads to a storage area. At the end, I see that the intersection is like a T. The left side is full of boxes, and the right extends to another little door at the end.

There's no designation on the door so it has to be unisex. I go in, snapping on the light, and am relieved to see that it's small, but clean, and there's a stall around the toilet. That's good, because the outside door is a little warped, and I just can't force the bolt home. I leave it shut, and go in the stall to do my business.

You know, after a trip to the facilities, when you really, really need it, the whole world looks a lot more cheerful. I finish the sanitation process, and am in the process of zipping up my pants when I hear the door scrape open. Someone else has gotten tired of waiting.

I open the door and step out cheerfully. "All done, no waiting."

"You don't know how happy that makes me." Diana Prince shoves the door shut. All the way. It snaps firmly into the warped frame with a grinding thump. That booger is going to take some tugging to get open again.

I blink (yeah, all right, I blink stupidly), and just stand there till the door of the stall swings shut behind me and thumps me in the butt. That makes me jump, and she smiles.

Well, this is awkward. Best thing is to go on as if this isn't a slightly creepy situation. I go to the sink and wash my hands. She just stands there, watching me. I watch her in the mirror as I dry my hands. I jerk my head suggestively toward the empty stall. "All yours, Diana."

She takes one long step that brings her up behind me. Her hands fall on my shoulders, squeezing a little, and she smiles at me in the mirror. "All mine."

I slither out from between her and the sink, the hair rising on the back of my neck. "Gotta go. Lois is waiting for me." I got to the door and tug on the handle. Damn, it is stuck! I'm going to have to really jerk to get it open.

Before I can do that Diana presses up against me from behind, reaches past me, and shoots the bolt, locking the door. I don't know how the fuck she did that, as much as I'd struggled with it before. It would have taken a lot of force. I am suddenly very worried about Amazon strength in comparison to mortal.

I feel hot breath on my neck. "Lois can wait. I can't."

"Oh cripes!" I squirm and manage to slide out. "Okay, joke's over. Lemme out."

She keeps smiling, and starts to unbutton her uniform jacket. She's getting undressed? No, this is not good, not good at all. "You know, Scribe, Lois isn't right for you."

"She isn't? I mean, we're just friends. We're roommates."

"Right, that's just my point. She's got you right there, in the privacy of her own place, and what does she do? Nothing." As she spoke, she was pulling off her belt. No, just a minute, not a belt. It was way too long for that, and it was thin and shiny, almost sparkly.

"I mean to say, it's a fucking waste anyway you look at it. You need to be with someone who's going to appreciate and make use of all you have to offer."

She's forming a loop in the end of... is that some sort of rope? Shit!

"I'm not offering anything. No way, no how, no go."

The smile gets all wolfish and pointy teethed. Well, maybe not the pointy bit, but dammit, you know what I mean. Fucking menacing. "Oh, that's all right, dear. I like it like that."

I back up. "Stay the fuck away from me."

She's dangling a long loop from the end of that spooky rope. "This is going to be so much fun. Steve has been such a submissive little wuss lately, I'm really ready for a challenge. It'll be good to get my hands on some reluctant stuff."

She suddenly jerks her arm, and the loop flies at me.

You'd think a red-neck from Texas would know instinctively how to dodge a lasso, wouldn't you? Apparently being semi-drunk (I'm sobering up fast) doesn't help. The thing settles around me neatly. She jerks her hand back and it tightens, pinning my arms to my sides. I pull back instinctively, tightening it even more.

"Stop this! Let me go right now, Diana. I mean it."

She takes up the slack, hand over hand. "I know you do. That's what makes it so delicious. Don't try to get loose."

I've been trying to force the loop back up over my head. Now my hands drop on their own volition. I try again, but they drop away when they touch the golden lasso, like they're boneless. "What is this?"

"It compels obedience."

"I thought it just compelled truth."

"That too. How many men have you slept with?"

I start to tell her it's none of her business. What comes out is, "None." I would clap my hands over my mouth if I could reach.

She's wound the slack of the rope into a coil, and fastened it to her belt. I flinch when I realize she's doing it to have her hands free. "That's good. How many women have you slept with?"

I bite my lip hard. I think I'm going to draw blood in another second or two, but instead I find myself saying, "None. Damn! Will you stop that! It isn't fair."

"You know what they say about love and war, Scribe. I'm good at both." She leans against me, grabs my head on both sides, and kisses me ferociously.

I find that I can't use my arms or knees to push her away. When I try any other way, I just end up leaning into the kiss, and that isn't what I want at all. I keep my lips pressed resolutely shut, despite insistent probing.

When she draws back, I turn my head to avoid another assault. "Stop it! I don't want you to touch me, Diana."

"Too bad. You shouldn't have been such a clit-tease, Scribe." She's unbuttoning my shirt. "You can't flirt around like that and expect to just turn off the responses." Her hand slides through the gap, slides inside my bra, and pinches rudely. "I've been thinking about you for a couple of days now, getting hotter all the time."

"But I didn't mean anything! It was just joking around. Jesus, can't you people take a joke?"

"I can take you." She shoves the other hand down the front of my pants, and I go up on tiptoe. "Think I can't? I could order you to do anything with this rope around you, and you wouldn't have any choice. I'll tell you the truth, though. I like a fight."

She digs with her fingers, and I yelp with pain and humiliation. "Just relax, why don't you? I'm not going to hurt you. Much." She takes her hand out of my shirt and unfastens my jeans. "Need a little more room here to do this right."

Okay, I'm going to be able to talk my way out of this situation, so I scream.

"Help! Fire!"

She laughes. Talk about feeling stupid, but this is what the freakin' articles recommend. When she gets her hand inside my panties, I really start raising a ruckus.

"Help! Stop that." I try to squirm my way back through the wall, away from those rough, probing fingers.

There's a pounding on the door. "Open up!" I almost wilt with relief. Lois.

"Fuck off, Nellie Bly." Diana calls. "You had your chance. We're busy."

"Lois, get me out of here! I'll be good, I swear!"

"You'll be good," Diana hisses. She jerks her hand, hard.

Ow. I really don't want to think about that right now. Or ever. I mean, Superman had groped me some, but he was gentle, and almost... well, respectful. This is abrupt, and hard, and it hurts. My knees go weak, but she holds me up against the wall with her own body, and that awful hand, pinning me.

I don't know what kind of sound I make. But there's was a babble of voices out in the hall, and suddenly the door just kind of explodes in. It hits the inside wall so hard that it comes loose on it's hinges and sticks before it can swing back closed.

In that frozen instant between the sound and Diana's next painful shove into my body, I catch a glimpse of Jimmy and Clive, side by side in the doorway, their feet just lowering from kicking in the door. Then Diana pushs again, biting me on the neck, and I howl.

Suddenly the tiny room is full of people. Clive grabs Diana by her hair (naturally) and rips her away from me. That brings a fresh yelp of pain, because the removal hurts just as much as the entrance did. That really seems to piss Clive off. And I was right, Clive isn't someone you want to piss off.

Jimmy grabs the golden lasso, jerking it off Diana's belt, and moves to unloop me. The second the rope is off me, I collapse to the floor. Shock, post traumatic stress syndrome, I don't know what all, but I pass out for a second.

It isn't long, but I must have missed some interesting stuff. I come to with Lois holding my head in her lap, sprinkling cold water on my face. I murmur, "Don't say it. I know, I asked for it."

She looks like she wants to cry. "No, Scribe." She kisses my forehead. "No one asks for that."

Someone has draped a jacket over me. I reach under it and close my pants up, wincing with each movement. Then I re-button my shirt, or try to. My hands are shaking too badly to be of much use. After a moment, Lois does it for me. Then I sit up and look around.

Jimmy squats nearby, pale and concerned. "You need an ambulance, sweety?"

"No, I don't think so. I... I don't think I'm bleeding, or anything."

"Not from lack of this bitch trying," I look toward the growl.

Clive is holding Diana by the scruff of the neck. They both look the worse for wear. Clive has a cut lip, and some nasty looking scratches on his neck. Diana is disheveled, and sported a dark bruise on one cheek. She is also thoroughly trussed up with her own rope. And she is wearing a ball gag. I guess Clive always travels prepared.

She glares at Clive venomously. He shakes her again, hard. "What have we told you, Diana? You ask the toys nicely before you play with them. That was totally uncalled for. Any fool could tell she's not ready for rough stuff. Scribe, precious, do you want us to call the police?"

I can feel my temperature dropping at the thought. Explain this to a succession of cops? But how can I let that woman get away with it, especially when it seemed that she might do the same thing again, and the next victim might not have a cavalry to ride to the rescue.

Seeing my indecision, Lois says gently. "It's all right, Scribe. We can take care of this privately. Superman knows where this witch truly belongs. She was only supposed to stay here till the last war was over, anyway. Her mother will be happy to have her back on the island. Though Diana may not like the punishment her mom will come up with once she learns what her little girl has been up to, especially since she's been giving Amazons a bad name. Clive, can you just hang on to her for a few hours?"

"Certainly. I have the perfect little dungeon just a few blocks away." He hands Jimmy a card, who passes it to Lois. "Scribe, darling, you just concentrate on feeling better. We're going to handle this for you." He jerks the rope, causing the glaring Diana to stumble. "Come on, you rapacious slut. I have a very interesting chair for you to try out for the next few hours. I think you'll be glad to go home by the time Superman comes for you." He smiles at me. "And no, pet, I'm not going to be enjoying this. Not like that."

He drags her out, and Lois and Jimmy help me to my feet. "I need a bath," I muttered. "I really, really need a bath."

"Can you walk?" Jimmy asks. I take an experimental step. I'm pretty wobbly. "We'll help. There's an exit just down here, and I had Toddy get a cab. C'mon Scribe, just a few steps."

They assist me partway down the corridor, to an exit door I hadn't seen in the dark. Outside the air is crisp and cold, and it makes me feel a little more sane. They bundle me into the cab, sitting on either side, and we start off.

I drop my head on Jimmy's shoulder. "Thank you," I whisper.

He strokes my hair gently. "I'm just sorry we weren't sooner. But we didn't know where you went. Bettina said her sister had told you where the employees' can was. Then Clive remembered that he saw Diana going back there, too, and we decided we'd better check things out. That Clive's a pretty cool dude. He's the only hairdresser I know that I'm not surprised they can kick down a door. Damn, I'm glad he ain't mad at me."

I start crying. Jimmy and Lois both put their arms around me, and I just blubber. "I feel so stupid." I wail.

"Not really stupid, Scribe," Lois soothes. "You're just so fucking innocent about some things. And the way you talk, and show off, people don't realize that."

They hold me and rock me and pet me all the way back to the apartment. By the time we get there, I've quieted to sniffles and hiccups, and they are both a little damp.

Upstairs, Lois gets what looks like an oversized flashlight and rigs it up out on the balcony. When she switched it on, it throws a circle of light on a cloud, with a large 'S' superimposed on it. I try to remember if this was part of the comics universe I used to read about, but right then I'm frankly too scrambled and stressed to think about it.