miscellany n 1: a collection containing a variety of sorts of things.

The Scooby Gang started arriving at the Magic Box just before Giles closed it up for the evening. Willow and Tara arrived together, as usual. Oz came by just after them, and Giles was gratified to see that things seemed to have smoothed out between the three. Oz had been a little disgruntled when he'd returned to Sunnydale and found that his ex-girlfriend was in a serious, committed relationship with another girl. But in Giles' opinion, the boy showed remarkable maturity for someone his age. He didn't make a single remark about 'well, that explains why we didn't work out.'

Xander and Buffy arrived together, Xander letting himself in with the key Gules had given him when he started helping on the weekend. The other members of the group heard them coming up the stairs, mostly because of Buffy. She had apparently learned why they were meeting, and was in the process of stating her opinion early and often.

"I can't believe you're even suggesting this, Xander. Of all the pea brained schemes you've come up with, this has to be the prize winner." As they entered the room she continued, "I can't believe that anyone half a brain would even consider it."

Giles said dryly, "Perhaps people with half a brain wouldn't, but I, having a full and fully functioning brain, happen to think it's a excellent idea."

Buffy blushed, but continued, "Look, Giles, this place is hectic enough without risking..."

"If you don't mind, I'd prefer to wait discussion until the full compliment of this company has arrived."

Buffy, Willow, and Oz looked around curiously. Oz said, "If everyone will forgive me for this statement, I'll bite. Whom are we waiting on?"

Giles said, "Well, actually, it's more of a member emeritus, but since he's here, I thought it would be politic to include him."

"Particularly since he would crash the party anyway." Angel stood in the doorway. "Hello, everybody. Read any good runes lately?"

Buffy had stiffened. "What's he doing here?"

"Wondering if you're really rude enough to talk about me instead of to me. Hello, Buffy." He nodded to the others. "Willow, Oz." He cocked his head toward Tara. "And friend?"

Willow put her arm around Tara. "Tara."

Angel's eyebrows rose. "Ah. Witch-in-arms?"

Tara gave him a friendly smile, and embraced Willow briefly. "Witch in her arms. No need to introduce him, anyone. It would be hard not to recognize you, Angel."

"Now that the Miss Manners bit is over with, can we get down to why we're here?" asked Xander.

"Not yet, Xander. We're still waiting for..."

"Start the party, ducks. The life of is here." Spike sauntered in, his hands thrust deep in the pockets of his jeans. He nodded at Spike. "Hullo, Broody."

"Spike. You're looking good."

"Course I am, mate." He turned cool eyes on Giles. "Now, what was it that required my presence on the one night I have to meself?"

Giles nodded at Xander. "Xander, since you've had the greatest contact, I think you should explain the situation."

"Okay. By now you've all met the two police officers on loan from Cascade--Jim Ellison and Blair Sandburg."

Buffy frowned. "You mean that those two hotties are cops? Ew."

Xander, Willow, and Tara gave her disapproving looks. "Just because a good bit of our former police force were trying to open the Hellmouth and unleash Hell on Earth doesn't mean that all lawmen are nasty, Buffy," scolded Willow. "I talked with Blair before, and he seems like a really nice guy."

Oz nodded agreement. "Very nice." Spike smirked.

"I agree, but the whole point of it is that they know something not quite kosher is going on in Sunnydale, and they know I'm involved in it. They asked me about it instead of just hauling my butt in and sticking me under a bright light and grilling my ass. I'm of the opinion that if we don't bring them in they'll either figure it out on their own and be pissed with us for not trusting them, or get killed. Personally, I'd rather not see them get killed. I'm rather fond of them."

Buffy scowled. "The last thing we need are some amateurs hanging around, distracting us and needing to be protected."

"Listen, Buff," Xander retorted, "I think that both of them are a hell of a lot more on the ball than I was when I started helping you kick demonic butt, and..." he trailed off. "That didn't come out right, but you know what I mean. What do the rest of you say?"

Willow said, "I'm for it. I mean, things are so strange around here that it doesn't take much to increase your risk factor, so we won't be endangering them all that much. And besides, they could prove an asset. Blair is an anthropologist, so he may have some insights on ancient mystic beliefs. If nothing else, he should be a real help in the research department. And Jim..." She shrugged. "He's got muscle, and he looks like he knows how to use it." She wondered about the rather dreamy smile that flitted across Xander's face.

Giles looked at Tara. "Tara?"

She shrugged. "I trust Willow's instincts."

Spike spoke up. "I'm for it. The long-haired lad was around when there was a bit of an incident." He made a face. "The game face slips in a bit unexpectedly some times. He didn't see much, but it would have been enough to send some blokes running for the hills. He doesn't spook easily."

Giles looked at Angel. "Angel?"

Angel started to speak, but Buffy broke in. "I don't think he should have any say in this. He isn't really a part of the group anymore--if he ever truly was."

"Cold, Buff," Angel said calmly. "I don't exactly disagree with you, but it's still cold. Anyway, I vote for them. Greater numbers are very seldom a bad thing."

Giles stared at Buffy's belligerent expression and sighed. "Do I even need to ask your vote, Buffy?"

"I say no. We don't know these people, we don't know if we can trust them. What if we explain things and they take off to the government or something. The last thing we need is guys in uniforms running all over the place."

There was silence. Finally Giles said, "Oh, all right, if no one else will say it, I will--Initiative." Buffy winced. "In any case, we have a majority vote. Xander, please call your friends and ask if it would be convenient for them to drop by."

"Right."

Jim hung up the phone. "Get your jacket, Einstein. We have a date at the Magic Box."

Blair shrugged into his jacket. "I had a date at the Magic Box. It was fuuuuun."

On the way over, he studied a sheet of paper. "Hopefully they're going to tell us exactly why our neighbor and a contestant as yet to be named were trotting through the park with a bag of what appears to be crematorium sweepings."

Jim glanced both ways at a stop sign. "I guess we should have been made suspicious by the prom suit."

"Why? If they cremated him, it would have gone up in a poof of smoke. I mean, not even polyester can survive cremation. And if he was buried in it, where does the cremation come in? No, I still haven't figured out how that monstrosity fits in."

Jim pulled up in front of the store. "Hey, don't dis the suit. It was the height of fashion back when I was in high school."

Blair shook his head. "Gawd, tell me you didn't wear one of those."

Jim rapped on the door. "Mine was more subdued. Navy blue and sapphire. It brought out my eyes, or so my prom date said."

"I can't believe you wore polyester."

"It got me laid." Someone was coming through the gloom of the interior.

"You dog. Losing your virginity on prom night. How clichéd."

Jim arched an eyebrow. "Who said anything about virginity?"

"Was she good?"

"He was excellent. I haven't been able to looked at a school janitor the same way since."

The door opened and Xander waved him in. "Hi, guys. Thank you for your prompt and courteous response. Everyone is upstairs." He relocked the door and began to lead them toward the back stairs. "Buffy was a little resistant to the idea, but I was expecting that. We all have our trust issues around here, but Buff is a special case."

The small living room was crowded. Xander made quick introductions to everyone who hadn't yet met then sat down. "Giles, I guess you ought to do the honors."

Giles cleared his throat. "Yes, well... Xander has mentioned that you two noticed him when he was conducting a bit of business the other night." Buffy tossed her hair angrily, glaring at Xander accusingly. Blair and Jim both found themselves glaring back, feeling protective. Giles sighed. "Perhaps I should start with a broad overview rather than specifics." He cleared his throat again. "Gentlemen, we are living at the entrance to Hell."

There was silence. Everyone was watching the two police officers expectantly. Jim and Blair exchanged glances. Finally Blair said, "Okay, granted that there's a dearth of good delivery restaurants and it's almost impossible to get a hot new release video on the weekend, I still wouldn't say it was all that bad."

"We're not joking, dude," said Xander. "It's called the Hellmouth, and it is a real value killer to real-estate. It's sort of a creepiness magnet. It attracts all sorts of colorful and interesting creatures, ones that are never featured on Wild Kingdom or the Crocodile Hunter."

"As usual, Xander states things in a bit more flippancy than I would, but he's correct. We're talking about the creatures that are popular to most folk lore, such as vampires, werewolves, ghosts, and succubae."

Willow piped up, "But we're also talking about a wide assortment beings that are so arcane that they've scarcely been noticed by humankind, but have preyed on them through the ages. We also get interdimensional drop ins from time to time."

Tara nodded. "Those are the tough ones. Boy, it's hard to figure out how to kill something without reference material."

Jim said mildly, "I usually find my service revolver to be pretty efficient. Giles, do you have a dog?"

"Holy non sequitur, Batman," murmured Xander.

"No, I don't keep pets," Giles answered. "I'm afraid they are targets for the type of creature we deal with."

Oz nodded. "Yep. Any pet in a horror movie that isn't needed to save the day at the end usually snuffs it."

"Do any of you have a dog?" Jim continued. His nostrils flared briefly. "A big dog, possibly a wolf hybrid? Buffy, why are you looking at Oz?"

She blinked rapidly. "He... uh... New earring, Oz?"

"Okay, no dogs. Giles, don't think I'm crazy, but do you have a dead body around here?"

Silence again, and more significant looks. Finally Giles said, "Not... as such. Why do you ask?"

"Because ever since I've come to Cascade I've been running into those two smells--doggy-wolf and dead, and it's particularly thick here tonight."

Xander deadpanned, "Told ya you should have changed the plug-ins, Giles."

Oz said, "Okay, I'll go first." He stood up. "Hi. My name is Oz, and I'm a lycanthrope." He looked at Blair. "Sorta explains my preference for doggie style, doesn't it?"

"My spirit guide is a wolf," said Blair.

"Are you trying to humor us, or are you serious?" asked Willow.

"A little of both, I guess. I really do have a spirit guide. I'm a shaman. Well, a rookie shaman, but I'm working on it."

"Really?" Giles looked interested. "Another magic user could be a great benefit."

"Whoa. I haven't reached the casting spells stage."

"Would you like to?"

Blair stared at him. "You're serious." He looked at Jim. "He's serious. I'm thinking that they're all serious."

"Crazies can be serious, too, Chief," Jim answered.

Giles explained briefly about Watchers and Slayers. Blair gave Buffy a sympathetic look. "And I thought my youth was dysfunctional."

"I'll need a little more than an interesting story and someone claiming to be a werewolf to be convinced," said Jim.

"Fair enough," said Giles. "One moment." He left the room, and returned a moment later carrying a small mirror, which he handed to Jim. "Jim, would you please turn your back and scan the room with this?"

Jim turned his back to the room, lifted the mirror, and examined the room's reflection, tilting it to pan the entire area. He made one sweep, then paused, frowning, and did it again. He slowly lowered the mirror and said softly, "Chief, get behind me."

Blair didn't hesitate to obey. When Jim used that tone of voice some serious shit was about to go down. "What is it, Big Guy?" Jim turned back and advanced a few steps toward Spike and Angel, concentrating. Then his eyes went wide and he backed up just as slowly. "Jim?"

"No reflection. No heartbeat," Jim said hoarsely. "None. And they're not breathing."

Spike smirked. "I try to remember, since it makes you lot more comfortable, but it's a bleedin' nuisance."

Blair snatched the mirror and repeated Jim's actions. When he turned back to the group, his face was pale, but calm. "I don't know why I'm surprised. Vampire and shape shifter legends are almost universal, right behind creation stories."

"They're taking this very well," commented Angel. He looked at Giles, "Don't you think they're taking this well? I mean, they're both police. I'd have expected Ellison there to have drawn down on us by now."

"If your intentions were immediately hostile, I don't think we'd have made it far past the truck," Jim answered.

"I can explain why we take this sort of news better than your average tourist," said Blair. "Why doesn't everyone have a seat and I'll give you the Reader's Digest condensed version of Sentinels and Guides." He explained quickly.

Buffy eyed Jim. "So you're, like, some sort of freak?"

Blair's voice was cold. "No more than you, Miss Kicker-of-Supernatural-Ass."

"What worries me about this," Jim said, "is that I'm not going to have the usual information to work on," he indicated Spike and Angel, "from you two. When I'm not sure of someone I can tell a lot from listening to heart and breathing rates, and scenting changes in hormones, like adrenaline."

"You don't have to worry about Spike," Xander assured him, ignoring the vampire's silent snarl. "He's basically fangless. That chip the Initiative put in his skull keeps him from harming humans."

"Okay, that smacks upsettingly of fascism," said Blair. "And how's he supposed to protect himself from hostile humans?"

"He isn't supposed to," explained Buffy. "He's a vampire." Everyone stared at her. "Don't look at me--it wasn't my idea."

"Don't worry about me, pet," Spike assured Blair. "There aren't too many of you bleedin' mortals I'd break a sweat over--given that I could still sweat."

"What about him?" Jim indicated Angel.

"He can speak for himself, thank you," said Angel dryly. "And I have my soul. You'd be surprised at what a difference in attitude that can make, especially for someone who's already been to Hell."

Blair blinked. "Okay, I'll want to hear about that later."

"No, you don't," said Xander. "Trust me."

Angel smiled at the tall brunette boy. "How would you know, Harris? I never had a chance to discuss it with you." He spoke to Blair and Jim. "You'll have to take his attitude toward me with a grain of salt. Xander's past experiences with vampires tends to color his opinions."

"Almost being chomped, drained of blood, and turned into a possessed undead creature of evil will do that to a person."

"Just out of curiosity, are all those cross, garlic, sunlight, moving water, stakes, beheading things true?" asked Blair.

"All but the belief that we can't cross moving water. I'd still be stuck in Ireland if that was true," said Angel.

"Okay," said Jim. "Let's say that we believe in vampires, werewolves, ghosties and ghoulies and long leggity beasties, and you folks believe in Sentinels and Guides. Now what?"

"All we ask is that you don't interfere with our patrols or demon control activities. We would be happy, however, to have you join in our efforts."

Jim crossed his arms, tapping his fingers on his elbows. He said slowly, "All these creatures and beings that you're eliminating--there's no doubt that they're a danger to the citizens?"

"They're a danger to anything mortal," Giles assured him. "I promise you, Detective Ellison, that we do not wipe out creatures because they might, perhaps, possibly become something of a hazard somewhere down the line."

"Excuse us a second." Jim and Blair put their heads close together and whispered, but it didn't take long. Finally Jim said, "We won't do anything to hinder you, and we'll take extra care and be on the look-out. We'll even help you with your patrols." He shrugged. "Neighborhood patrols are usually a good thing. But we can't take any actions that wouldn't be sanctioned by the law. We're officers--we have to follow the book, or we won't be allowed to do our jobs."

"Fair enough," said Giles.

The others expressed agreement. "Just not having to try to keep the secret will be a relief," Xander sighed.

"Is there anything particular right now that's worrying you?" Blair asked.

"No, nothing right now," Giles assured him. "We even seem to be making some headway. The local demonic population seems to be at an all time low. Things are relatively quiet."

Angel smiled, dark eyes fastened on Xander, who was trying to ignore him. "Of course, that can change at any moment."