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Littermates

1965--Confession

Nana had half expected the room to be empty. She had thought that there was a slim chance that there might be one other girl there, that perhaps she had a couple of very confused twins on her hands, but there was no one. *Like the lady in the movie,* she thought. *Three people in one body.*

Acacia moved toward the bed, eyes fixed on a space a couple of feet above the mattress. "Nana's been telling me about this movie about a woman who was really three people."

She sat on the bed, falling back into a languid, half reclining pose. Her expression shifted, elegant brows arching, and drawled, "I've heard of that. What was it--All About Eve?"

Nana felt a clenching sensation in her belly, and recognized it as excitement rather than fear. "No, Naresha, that was the theater story with Bette Davis." At her use of the middle sister's name, the girl on the bed sat up, casting a quick, curious glance to either side. *She's looking at her sisters. She's surprised that I 'see' her.*

Naresha said slowly, "Nana... do you see me?"

"I see Acacia, dear, but I know it's you." She smiled. "You couldn't be anyone else. Just because a person can't see something doesn't mean it isn't there." She made a calculation, then held out the cup of tea toward a space to Naresha's right. "Milda, do you really need this tea, or was Casey just trying to keep me from prying?"

The girl on the bed shifted again, her shoulders rounding slightly, the wrinkles on her brow smoothing. She reached for the cup and, in Milda's soft voice, said, "I could use it right now."

As she sipped, Nana sat on the bed, near the foot in order to avoid 'sitting' on anyone. "So, people only see one of you at a time, but you're all three here all the time? That's different from the Eve in the movie."

Milda shrugged, setting aside the cup. "Different circumstances produce different results, Nana. You know that from baking." She pulled her legs up on the bed, curling them under her.

"Will you tell me about your circumstances?" The girl was silent, studying her. Nana could sense several people looking at her through that one pair of blue eyes--eyes that were so much older than they should be.

Then the girl's eyes seemed to unfocus slightly, and she began to speak. The tones and cadences shifted from moment to moment, and for the first time Nana heard the three sisters talking among themselves.

Naresha frowned. "I don't know about doing our dirty laundry in public. After all, no one's ever given a flying fuck before. No offense, Nana."

"None taken, dear."

Acacia was back. "She's different. She's had her share of troubles, too. She spent time in one of those bins, like Lacey. She tried to kill herself..."

Milda moaned, "Oh, Nana!" Her voice was sorrowful.

"It's all right, Milda." Nana patted her knee. "I'm fine as long as I take my medicine and keep busy. I have the impression that there are people who might be looking for you girls, and I want to assure you that they'll get no help from me."

Naresha shook her head. "You say that now, darling, but you don't know who we are or what we've done." She paused. "There's a good chance the police are looking for us. Would you be willing to harbor fugitives?"

"In a minute," she said placidly. At the surprised look she explained, "I have little fondness for the authorities. The neighbors called them to our house more than once when my father beat my mother to the point of screaming. All they ever did was make him walk around the block to cool down."

The girl snorted and Acacia said, "Sounds about right. I say we tell her. I'm getting sick of carrying this around. Someone has to know exactly what The Bastard is capable of."

She nodded her head, and Milda spoke. "I agree, but let's keep it simple. Just one of us tell her."

There was a nod and Naresha said, "All right, I'm in for it, too. But you tell her, Casey. Milda wasn't there, and I..." She scratched restlessly at the sheet, "I'm not as cool about it as I thought I was. And let's agree to leave our, uh, monthly problems out for the time being. This is going to be hard enough for her to absorb as it is."

Acacia cleared her throat. "Okay." She paused. "Shit, I don't know where to start."

"Begin at the beginning, dear," Nana urged. "First there was you, then I suppose Naresha, then..."

Acacia smiled. "Nope." She made her voice resonant, almost biblical. "In the beginning there was Kitten. There was Kitten, and Daddy, and Mommy, and Daddy and Kitten were very happy. Mommy wasn't, but as we learn later, Mommy was a 14 carat, gold plated bitch." Acacia's body tensed. "Then something very, very bad happened to Daddy..."

Acacia talked for a long time. Nana heard it all. She heard about Daddy dying practically in Kitten's arms, apparently mauled by a pack of wild dogs. She heard about the trip to the dirty, cold city, and how Kitten became Kathleen, because Mommy just was not going to have a child with such a ridiculous name. She heard about the that job Mommy took, and the men Mommy brought home--especially one particular man, one who said he wanted a little girl just like Kathleen.

She heard about the wedding, and poor, sick Lacey, who had succeeded where Nana had failed. She heard about the magnificent house and how it had become The Hell Hole. She heard about how Wallace Bernard and Margaret had transformed into The Bastard and The Bitch. She heard about the beautiful clothes The Bastard had bought for Kathleen, and how he had loved to strip them off her. She heard about the baths, the 'pony rides', 'wrestling', and the game of hide and seek he had played with her the first time they'd been alone in The Hell Hole--and what had happened when he had found her.

"He left her alone for almost two weeks after that first time. She thought it was over, but he was just letting her heal up so The Bitch wouldn't suspect." Acacia snorted. "He could've sodomized her in the next room, with the door open, and she would've found some way to be deaf and blind."

Nana was near tears. "Oh, no! Surely she didn't know! No mother could let their child be subjected to that and... and not castrate the animal."

Then Acacia told her about the ripped dress, and how Kathleen could see the truth of the matter in her mother's eyes, and felt that she was completely alone. "But she wasn't--not any more. She needed help, and I was finally strong enough to do something. It wasn't much. I only managed to slip out of the fog for a second, but I used the time." Her grin was pointed, and her eyes glinted. "I think that was the first time The Bastard was ever kneed in the crotch, but it wasn't the last."

"Good for you, dear. Since you were in the bathroom, it's too bad you couldn't have gotten hold of a razor." The three sisters looked at each other, then looked at Nana. "Well, the world would be much better off it you'd neutered the scum."

Acacia grinned. "I knew there was a reason I liked you, and it would have taken castration to stop him from messing with Kathleen. But I was too weak and slow back then to kill him, and by the time I got older and stronger Naresha was there, and reminded me what they did to murderers." She cocked her head. "They had the death penalty in our state. Real sensible, actually, but nothin' I'd want to experience just for protecting myself and my sister."

"I'll take over, darling," Naresha drawled. "I want to tell her how easy it was to flimflam that sucker at the records office." Nana listened with murmurs of admiration as Naresha described how they had planned and prepared for their escape. Her her expression became even harder as she heard of how Naresha had felt compelled to play up to The Bastard to lull him into complacency. "But it didn't happen like we'd planned it."

"I think it was better," Acacia said firmly. "We gave him a little back for all the pain he'd dished out over the years." She smiled at Nana. "Glass lamp over the head--heavy glass lamp. The only reason I'd ever like to lay eyes on him is that I'd kind of like to see if I marked him up."

Naresha told of their triumph as they escaped, the steps they took to conceal their identity ("We both liked the haircut, but Acacia didn't like the dye job. I loved it. I could finally show my true self to the world.)

"So we moved on. We decided that the first year or two we wouldn't stay anywhere very long, but motels are expensive, and rooming house owners were suspicious." She gave a mock pout. "For some reason they didn't trust Acacia or myself. We were lucky that Milda came out then."

Milda gave Nana a sheepish smile. "I'm sort of the Trojan Horse. I'd get inside, and before they knew it they were stuck with all of us." Her expression grew sad, "But we always had to move on. They'd start to suspect there was more than one of us living in the room. Or someone would start asking question. Or..." her face paled, "there were the posters."

Nana looked worried and sympathetic. "The police are looking for you?"

Naresha examined her nails. "Not any more than any other runaway. We have a strong suspicion that The Bastard claimed his cuts and bruises as an accident." The skin seemed to tighten across her cheekbones, and she flexed her fingers. Nana's eyes widened. It looked as if her nails had grown for a split second, the receeded. "He's been looking for us, though, I'm sure. He doesn't deny himself anything, and he wants his toy back."

"When did this happen, dear?"

"Two and a half years ago. We'll be eighteen next year, and he won't be able to do anything to us legally."

Nana sighed. "All that time, shifting from place to place, rootless. It must have been hard for you all."

Acacia shrugged uncomfortably. "Naresha and I do all right." Her voice softened. "It's Milda that it's been hard on. She was made to make a home."

Nana gazed at the girl sitting on the bed, the girl with the short blonde streaked hair. She blinked, and a pale girl with shiny black, dutch-doll style hair lounged languidly on the bed. Another blink and a gentle eyed red-head was watching her. *Dear. Usually if something like this happened, I'd figure I needed my medicine adjusted. But with these three...* she nodded to herself. *Yes. Three.* She said slowly, "Girls, I hope you don't feel that you need to leave, now that I know. I want you all to stay."

Milda said quietly, "That's so good of you, Nana, but it could mean trouble for you, you know. The Bastard wouldn't be above using coersion on someone he thought was helping us."

Nana waved a hand. "As if I I'm afraid of that filth. He's nothing but a bully and a coward, taking advantage of a child placed in his care. No, dear ones, you stay here with me. I will cheerfully tell anyone who asks a story that would make Pinochio's nose sprout twigs. I can tell them that you're my neices, down from Canada."

Milda looked puzzled. "But you don't have any neices. You don't even have any brothers or sisters."

"Yes, but no one around here knows that." She snorted. "It would be too much trouble for my neighbors to actually get to know me." She took Milda's hands. "Please." After a moment's hesitation, she looked to either side of Milda, addressing the other two sisters as if they were as solid and visible as the third. "I never had children of my own, and you three have become very dear to me."

They heard the front door open and close. A moment later quick footsteps mounted the stairs, and there was the sweet sound of a man whistling a folk tune. Nana patted Milda's hand. "And I'm not the only one who'd be sad if you went away."

Milda gazed longingly at the door, then looked pleadingly at her sisters. Acacia looked at Naresha. Naresha shrugged. "I like it here," she admitted.

Acacia nodded. "It suits me, too." She grinned at Nana. "I didn't know it was possible for someone your age to be so cool."

Nana laughed. "Well, thank you! So it's settled?"

All three sisters discussed the major decisions in their life, but Acacia was senior, and the survival expert, so she spoke. "Yeah, it's settled. We'll stay as long as we can, Nana. Hopefully we can stay under the radar for another six or seven months, and then it won't matter. We won't have to run anymore.

Footsteps came back down the hall and paused outside the door. There was a rap, and Colin called softly, "Milda?"

Nana watched a shining smile spread over the girl's face. "Just a minute, Colin." She went to the dresser and removed a red wig and pair of glasses from a drawer, donning them.

Acacia had disappeared, and Milda was in her place. She came and gave Nana a hug, then went and opened the door. Nana could see past her to where Colin waited in the hall. A smile almost identical to the one Milda wore lighted his face, and he reached for her hand. "They're having a crafts fair at the park. Want to go?"

"I'd love to." She threw a happy glance back at Nana. "We'll try not to be too late, Nana, and don't worry about me--Colin will take care of me."

When they were gone, Nana looked around the empty room, half expecting to see Naresha or Acacia smiling back at her. "Yes, dear, I know he will, and so will I. You don't have to do it all by yourself now."

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