Disclaimer: Samurai Troopers are not mine. Pity.
I gave Ryo just about the hardest life I could think of. I really do love Ryo, it's just that I can see him coming from a real hard luck back ground.

Warning, I'm not nice to Ryo.




IT CAN ONLY GET BETTER
By: Cousin D

Email: jdctidd@ttlc.net


Ryo shivered in the cold, biting wind of January. He hated the cold! With his school bag slung over one shoulder, Ryo tugged his thin jacket tighter around him and tugged the woolen cap down to cover his ears. He tried to ignore the stares of the other students as he walked slowly through the schoolyard to the front door of his new school.

Ryo tried to convince himself that he had a perfect right to be here, just because he didn't have a uniform and his clothes were a little more worn than theirs was, didn't mean they had to stare.

He had nothing to be ashamed of! Ryo tried to convince himself. Still, Ryo was sad to see that everyone was wearing uniforms, the traditional blue for Japanese school boys. All his money had been used up to buy food, so he would have to work tonight. The thought no longer repulsed him as it used to, he'd been working for so long. Just as long as no one here found out exactly what he did for a job, and so long as Granma never found out. It would break her heart if she ever learned that he was a talented thief.

Still, Ryo couldn't help but to shrink down into the collar of his jacket when he heard someone whisper, "Why isn't he wearing a proper coat? It's freezing today."

"He's filthy! Can't he even wash?"

A girl's giggle. "Just hope you don't have to sit next to him, all that hair looks like he has fleas!"

Ryo cringed. He'd just splurged on a trip to the public baths last week. He wouldn't be able to afford to go again until Saturday, and that was only if nothing unexpected happened.

Still, this was his first day of school and he'd wished to start it better than this. Literally, this was his first day of school, he'd never gone to school before. His grandmother had taught him to read a little when he was little, but that was before they fell on hard times.

Now there was far more to worry about than reading, or at least that was what Ryo had thought before granma had started insisting he start school. Ryo would never find out exactly what had gotten her onto this idea after so long, but he thought it was foolish. Really, he should be with her and taking care of her rather than wasting his time in school!

Still, granma had said, make me proud, Ryo. Make me proud.

"Remember," His grandmother had said a few hours earlier before he'd left for school, "You are a Sanada! From a proud and honorable family line. Despite what our circumstances now, you are still a Sanada, Ryo, you must remember that."

She wanted so badly to be proud of him, and Ryo had never done anything to let her know that he was anything but totally honorable. If there were one thing that Ryo couldn't bear the thought of, it would be to have his granma disappointed in him.





A short while later Ryo stood in front of the class feeling self-conscience with all the eyes on him. He tried not to fidget as the teacher introduced him.

"Class, please welcome Mr," The teacher glanced at the papers on her desk. "Mr. Sanada Ryo."

The class obediently chorused a welcome and Ryo was asked if he'd like to share anything about himself. Ryo silently shook his head. Please, don't make me talk! Ryo thought desperately.

The teacher shrugged. "As you like. Take a seat in the back and just follow along for today. You can pick up your books later." Ryo saw the empty seat she'd pointed to and made his way back. "You'll also need a uniform, Mr. Sanada." The teacher reminded him.

Ryo sat next to a boy with auburn hair and a sweet expression. The boy smiled at him. "Hi, I'm Mouri Shin." He stuck out his hand and Ryo shook his cautiously. He had a hard time trusting people, but Shin was easy to trust, for some reason. "Well, it's nice to meet someone else who's new. I just moved here from England, so I've felt like a bit of an outcast. Don't worry, though. I'll introduce you to my friends later. You'll like them."

Just then the teacher interrupted, "Mr. Mouri. Mr. Sanada, do you have anything to share with the class?" She sounded very irritated.

Both shook their heads.

"Since you want to talk so badly, Mr. Sanada, please answer the question on the black board."

Ryo paled visibly before standing up slowly. He licked his lips and looked at the board where the teacher had indicated. It was math, he was sure of that, but he really didn't understand it as he'd never done anything harder than adding and subtracting. Why were there letters in the problem? Well, the teacher was waiting impatiently for an answer.

"I d-d-don't k-k-know." Ryo stuttered, spraying spit. Everyone was starring at him. Even Shin was starring.

The teacher blinked, surprised, and a terrible silence filled the room.

Ryo blushed, raising a hand to wipe the dribble of spit off the corner of his lips while everyone stared at him and he wanted to sink into the floor. I hate talking, Ryo thought. It wasn't his fault he couldn't talk right!

"Oh." Was all the teacher could say. "Please sit down, Mr. Sanada." Ryo quickly sat. Great, first day of school and now everyone thinks I'm an idiot. In the small, repressed corner of his mind, Ryo felt a flame grow brighter. The fire in his mind was fed by his anger at himself and embarrassment. It wanted to grow, but fortunately, Ryo saw it in time and squashed it. Firmly, he pushed the fire back into place. The fire never completely vanished, but Ryo usually managed to keep it quiet.

There was a splattering of mutterings before the teacher called everyone to attention to start the lesson again. Ryo sunk into his chair. He just knew they were talking about him.

Ryo cast a look at Shin, who looked at him curiously, but not with pity and Ryo was thankful. He just couldn't stand pity.





It was in the halls where Ryo was trying to figure out the combination lock on his locker that Shin came back with one of his friends. Ryo stared at the combination angrily. It just wasn't working!

"Hey, Ryo!" He turned to see Shin (half-afraid that Shin was coming by to tease about his stutter) coming toward him with a boy at his side. The boy had bright blue hair and a bandanna to hold it back away from his face. They both stopped at his locker "This is my best friend, Touma. Touma, this is Ryo, he's new in school."

Touma held out his hand. "Nice to meet you."

Ryo shook his hand, but didn't speak in return. To this Touma raised an eyebrow. "What's the matter? Cat got your tongue?"

Shin elbowed his friend. "Touma, be polite! He doesn't like talking."

Ryo breathed thankfully that Shin was sensitive enough to spare him embarrassment.

Touma gave Shin a slight, friendly push. "If you want polite, you should be hanging out with Seiji!" Touma suddenly grabbed the arm of a passing blond and pulled him into the conversation. "Right, Seiji?"

The tall blond boy raised an eyebrow. "Let go of me, Touma." He stated quietly.

Touma, however, just wrapped his arm through Seiji's like a sweetheart would. "But, Seiji, darling," Touma said in a falsetto voice and fluttering his eyes. "Don't you love me anymore?"

Seiji turned a little pink. "Touma, take your arm off me, before you lose it, please."

Touma, doing as he was asked, looked at Shin. "Told you he was polite. Even when he's threatening to maim me, he says please." Touma giggled at this before looking at Ryo again. "Ryo, this is Seiji, another friend of ours. Seiji, this is Ryo, but he doesn't talk."

Another, large figure walked up behind Seiji and smiled broadly. "MORNING!" He practically yelled, slapping the serious looking Seiji on the back. Seiji almost fell down, dropping all his books, and the expression on his face was enough to make even Ryo smile.

Touma gasped. "Dear God! He can smile!" He pointed at Ryo in disbelief. Ryo's smile instantly disappeared and Touma groaned. "I was only teasing, Ryo. Lighten up, pal."

Ryo wasn't sure how he felt about this. All four boys stood around him talking and laughing. They were all very friendly, but he didn't want to get to close and making friends as it would just hurt in the end. Still, none of them seemed to be bothered by the fact that he just listened and didn't add to the conversation.

Shu, the large boy who'd surprised Seiji, was loud and boisterous. He seemed to be the kind of person anyone could like. Seiji turned to him and said, "Shu, my family needs someone to do light cleaning and maintenance around the dojo. Do you need a job? It's only a couple of hours a week." Ryo instantly came to attention.

Shu shook his head. "Sorry, but my folks keep me pretty busy in the restaurant."

Seiji just shrugged. "Ah, well. We'll find someone else."

Ryo started to smile again. This was it! A job! Granma could be proud of him for this.

The bell ran before he could say anything and everyone hurried to class. He would have to ask Seiji after school.



Seiji-


Seiji opened the door of his family's home and was surprised to see Ryo standing there. Ryo smiled at him, nervously. "H-h-hello, Seiji." He stuttered. "M-m-may I talk to your f-f-father?" Ryo breathed deeply after the unusually long speech and Seiji knew Ryo wasn't used to talking much. His stutter might improve if he talked more, but he must get teased a lot.

Shin had told them all about Ryo's stutter when Ryo was not around to be embarrassed so they could all try to be careful about making him at ease. Seiji understood exactly what Shin wanted, but Touma might go out of his way to tease Ryo and Shu was a little thick in the brain department, so Seiji was worried that he might slip.

"Please come in." Seiji invited, always courteous and ignoring the stutter. Ryo came in, with a shy smile after wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, and remembered to take off his shoes, but only after he saw the other shoes near the front door. "My father's in town on business, can I help you?"

Ryo fidgeted, unsure of how to say whatever it was that he wanted to say. Finally, he just opened his mouth. "J-j-job?" He asked.

"What?" Seiji frowned.

Ryo opened his mouth, but really didn't want to talk again. He waved for Seiji to follow him. Seiji did as Ryo asked, curious. Ryo led him to the front wall of the family house where Seiji's father had earlier posted a notice.

HELP WANTED
GENERAL MATINENCE AND CLEANING
HARD WORKER NEEDED

"You want the job?" Seiji asked. "It doesn't pay much. Mostly it's just cleaning the dojo after classes and helping around the house."

Ryo nodded eagerly, a happy smile on his face. He pulled up the sleeve of his oversized sweatshirt and flexed an arm to show off thin, underdeveloped muscles. "You're a hard worker?" Seiji asked, understanding what Ryo was getting at. Again, Ryo nodded.

Seiji thought about it and then shrugged. "I can't see any reason not to hire you. Come back tomorrow after school and you can start."

Seiji was very surprise when Ryo actually threw his arms around Seiji and hugged him impulsively. He just stood there while Ryo ran down the street, happy as a clam to have a job.

"How very odd."



A few days later, Ryo-



The teacher studied Ryo's paper in front of the class with a frown on her face. "Mr. Sanada, is this some kind of joke?" She asked acidly, pointing at his test paper.

Ryo shook his head vigorously. He was still dressed in his one pair of sweat clothes, though he was waiting for the end of the week when he would get paid from his work at the Date Dojo and be able to buy a uniform. Ryo licked his lips nervously, waiting for punishment. He'd done his best on this assignment, but his reading level was about on par with an eight-year-old. Not the best for high school level literature.

"Then what is all this scrawl?" She gestured at the obscure, childish writing. It honestly looked as if a first grader had done the test. Some of the answers made no sense at all and others were illegible. "It looks as if you didn't even read half the questions!" She shook her head. "I would hate to fail you on your first test in a new school, Mr. Sanada, but I may have to." Her eyes narrowed in thought as she regarded her silent, nervous student. He looked very sad, but wouldn't say anything in his own defense. Most students she had would have tried to think up an excuse, but Ryo just stood there and took it. "I'll tell you what, Mr. Sanada. I'll let you take a make up exam, but you must pass it. Do you understand? I will give you only one chance."

Ryo gulped and, with his face red as the rest of the class staring at him, nodded solemnly. He slowly took his seat with his failed test in hand. Ryo stared at the top of his desk, refusing to look up until the class ended.
How was he supposed to pass this? Ryo felt like crying. Reading was the hardest class for him, he just couldn't do it! Ryo felt the fire trying to grow, to feed on his negative emotions. He stared down at the miserable paper he'd worked so hard on when a hand touched his shoulder, instantly dousing the fire. It was the blue haired boy, Touma.

Touma took pity on him with a sympathetic smile. "Hey, if you like, I'll help you study. I guess if you're in a new school, everything can be kinda hard at first."

Ryo looked at him for a moment, before nodding slowly. He wasn't sure if it was safe to trust Touma, but the other boy seemed to really want to help, but Touma had been very nice to him. Hesitantly, Ryo smiled.

"Great, I'll meet you in the library at lunch time. OK?"

Ryo nodded, letting the smile widen. Touma was very smart, or so Ryo had heard. Maybe with a little help he just might be able to pull this off.


Touma-



Touma knew something was odd very quickly as he sat with Ryo at the library table. The way Ryo was glaring at the textbook infront of him. The way he almost seemed angry when Touma asked him questions about what he was reading.

Finally, Touma closed the book and forced Ryo to look at him. "You can't read, can you?"

Ryo, once again, blushed. "N-n-not much." He said ashamed, but not surprised that Touma had noticed.

Touma was shocked. It often surprised him to hear about people who learned to read when they went to first grade. He had been reading since he was three. Still, nothing was impossible if Ryo would try hard enough. "Don't worry about it." Touma smiled at his new friend. "I'll help you learn." Ryo's face brightened with hope. "Of coarse, we'll have to tell Miss Sera." Ryo's face fell. "Oh, relax. She won't hold it against you and she's a great teacher, so she'll probably help you."

Shu was suddenly with them and flopped down in the chair next to Ryo. "Hey guys! What are you doing in here instead of eating?" Shu set his bag on the table they were sitting at.

"Some of us study at school." Touma told him with a superior, but teasing, air.

Shu shook his head, pitying his friend. "Not at lunch time, you don't." With a sweep of his arm, Shu pushed all of Touma's books (all thirty-eight of them) onto the floor where they landed with a crash and then looked at Ryo. "You have to watch this guy. He forgets to eat if he gets his nose in a book." With a cheery smile, as he ignored Touma's acid looks from where Touma was picking up his books.

"I do not forget to eat!" Touma defended himself. Then he looked down and mumbled, "It just slips my mind sometimes."

Ryo smiled and then the smile faded when Shu began to unpack his bag. No one could eat so much! Seven sandwiches, six bottles of soda, junk food, a whole bag of apples, not to mention a mixing bowl full of rice and three whole fish along with about two pounds of chicken.

Ryo's stomach started to ache looking at it.

"Say, Touma, did you even bring any lunch today?" Shu asked.

Ryo watched as Touma froze for just a moment before looking up with a very forced smile. "Naw, you know me, I forgot again." Ryo thought that this was a very odd reaction. Why would Touma be tense about lunch?

Shu didn't smile with him, but pushed a large part of his lunch to Touma with a serious expression. Touma smiled gratefully. Ryo wondered if there was something that was going on with Touma, but he didn't ask. It wasn't his business.

The three boys sat in the library quietly while Ryo tried not to think of his stomach that seemed to be burning. He desperately wanted to ask Shu for a bite to eat, but granma had always taught him to act with pride. He was from a long line of proud warriors, granma told him. Proud people who would never beg anything.

Ryo's mind flashed back to a day long ago when he'd asked his granma why they didn't go to the local shelter for food and warmth. She had looked at him sternly as they walked down the streets. "Shelters are for those who have nothing, Ryo. We can not take away from the truly needy." She lectured. "We are able to work for our food and, what we can't earn, we don't need." His dignified grandmother, then stronger, had led him away from the crowded shelter and onto find another, probably, temporary job. Even homeless, she had always been so regal, even dressed in rags.

Then again, Ryo thought bitterly as he brought his mind back to the present, proud warriors would never steal, either, but that wasn't beneath his dignity.

"Hey, man, aren't you going to eat? Lunch is almost over?" Touma looked at where Ryo was just sitting, staring at the book in front of him.

Ryo shook his head, but his stomach betrayed him by choosing that time exactly to growl loudly. Both of his friends stared at him before they smiled. "If you forgot your lunch, just say something! You can have part of mine." Shu generously pushed more of his food to Ryo. Ryo stared at the food and wanted to cry. Food! And he didn't even have to ask for it!

The bell rang, calling them to the next class. Touma and Shu left Ryo and when he was sure they were both gone, Ryo quickly opened his bag and scooped the sandwich and apple in. He left the library happily and tried to think of a way to repay Shu for his kindness. Ryo stopped in the hall and guzzled water from the drinking fountain to quench the hunger pains and continued his day.


Touma-


After school, Touma walked with Ryo out into the open air. He usually looked for an excuse to stay away from home. There was a reason that Shu usually brought more food than he needed. He did it just to share with Touma because Touma's dad spent all his meager money on drugs, booze, or hookers. "I can come to your place to help you study, if you like." Touma offered. He would like to meet Ryo's family and see where his new friend lived.

Ryo stopped walking and looked at his sneakers. "N-n-no."

Touma frowned. "Why not?"

Ryo swallowed hard and refused to look at Touma. "N-n-not a g-g-good idea." With that, Ryo took off running and leaving a confused and hurt Touma behind.

"What was that all about?" Shu was suddenly next to Touma and had apparently seen everything.

"He was very rude!" Touma scowled at Ryo's back. "He asked me to help him with his home work, but when I offered to go to his house, he said no! Some friend." Touma was more than a little hurt by this. Ryo had probably heard others talking about him. Touma knew quite well that he was the school freak. The blue haired genius. Somehow, he'd thought Ryo would be different with his stutter and all. He had thought that Ryo would know what it was like to be different. How wrong can you judge a person?

"Well," Shu looked after where Ryo had gone with a thoughtful expression. "Why didn't you invite him to your house?"

Touma looked at his best friend, shocked. "Are you mad!? How can you suggest that?" His mind went to his constantly drunk, abusive father.

Shu gave him a meaningful look. "So if you have a reason for not wanting people at your home, maybe Ryo does, too."

Touma stared and them smiled. "My friend, your intelligence is seriously underrate." then he turned serious. "Maybe he needs help."

So the two friends agreed to follow Ryo, just to make sure he wasn't in the same situation as Touma. Somehow, to Touma, it seemed easier to help someone else than to help himself out of his own situation.

Ryo led them though a maze of streets into the bad apart of the city. It seemed like they walked forever, until Ryo turned suddenly, and walked into a badly lit alley.

"He lives out here?" Shu said confused.

Shu and Touma stopped at the edge of a building and peered around the corner. This was what they saw:

Ryo went the back of the dead end alley and knelt next to a large white and black something. Ryo put a hand on hit. "Hiya, 'B-b-blaze. H-h-how was your d-d-d-day?" There was a rumble in response and the black and white thing moved. Shu's mouth fell open when he saw that the thing was an immense white tiger. It licked Ryo's hand affectionately. "Yeah, I m-m-missed you, t-t-too." Ryo sounded as if he were answering the creature.

Both eavesdroppers were startled to hear a new voice from someone they didn't see. "Ryo." The voice was thin and tired. "Have you eaten today?"

"Yeah." Ryo lied. "F-f-friend gave me l-l-lunch." Ryo said with his usual short sentences and painful stuttering and unzipped his school bag. He pulled out the food that Shu had given him earlier and set it on the ground. Gently, Ryo leaned over and pulled someone, who was laying down, up to lean against a wall. It was an old woman with dark skin, like Ryo's, and her white hair falling all around her shoulders.

Shu frowned. That meant Ryo hadn't eaten the lunch Shu had given him and likely meant that he hadn't eaten anything all day.

Ryo continued. "Eat, granma." Amazingly, his words came out straight, for once. Ryo picked up the bag and handed food to the old woman slowly. She took it with shaking hands.

"So, you have made friends?" Ryo's grandmother asked. Ryo nodded, before pulling out a bright orange pill bottle out of his shirt. He helped his grandmother to take one of the pills and she continued speaking. "Thank you, Ryo, dear. I don't think the medicine will help much longer. Everyday seems to get longer and I just can't seem to get myself going lately." At Ryo's alarmed look, she managed a smile. "Don't worry, child. I'm not gone, yet, and we Sanada's are strong!"

Touma nudged Shu and motioned his friend to follow him. They walked away until they could speak without the risk of Ryo hearing or seeing them. They didn't want him to think they were spying on him for no reason. "He's homeless? Why didn't he tell us?" Shu asked, baffled. If his friend needed help, why didn't he just ask?

"Pride." Touma answered bitterly. "Why didn't I tell you about my dad when we first met?" He felt awful about being angry with Ryo. "Damn, we should have thought of this. He doesn't eat and he can't afford a uniform, even I have a uniform! He only wears one set of clothes, for goodness sakes." Touma was very upset at himself for having missed how badly off Ryo was. "I guessed that his family was poor, but I didn't think he was as bad off as this. Shu, the next time Ryo wants to study with me, can we go to your house?"

Shu slapped him on the back. "Of coarse! Mama will even feed him."

They both left, trying to think of how to best help Ryo without damaging his pride to much.



Seiji-



Seiji watched as his classmate scrubbed the dojo floor as he cooled off from his work out. Seiji was to far advanced to take part in the classes his father was giving, but he helped out when he could and grandfather gave him private lessons. Ryo had diligently come to work every afternoon and he was indeed a hard worker.

Seiji liked Ryo, oddly enough. There were few people he liked outside his family. In fact, he could count the number of actual friends he had on one hand. Shu, Shin, Touma, and, now, Ryo.

While he worked, a heavily sweating Ryo paused and pulled off his dirty gray sweatshirt and Seiji almost gasped at the condition Ryo was in.

"He is a hard worker."

Seiji didn't have to turn to look at his grandfather.

"Yes," Seiji answered. "But, I didn't realize he was so thin." It disturbed him to no end that he hadn't noticed it before. That must be why Ryo wore all the baggy clothes. Seiji could clearly see Ryo's ribs and his arms were painfully thin. From the back, Ryo's spine stood out horribly, like a knotted rope under his skin. He must were all the baggy clothes to hide how thin he was. How could Ryo find strength to do anything?

"Have you asked him why he wants to work so hard?" Grandfather asked Seiji.

Seiji shook his head. "I presumed that he wanted to make a little extra money." "Touma called me last night." Seiji told his grandfather softly. "He told me that he and Shu followed Ryo home the other day. Ryo's homeless and he's trying to take care of his sick grandmother. Touma doesn't think Ryo's grandmother looks very good."

Grandfather just took it all in as they watched Ryo start to wash the windows in the dojo. "It seems as if he needs this job very badly. Perhaps there is another way we can help him." Grandfather suggested before he left.

Seiji thought about this while Ryo worked like a dog and finally decided.

Seiji caught Ryo before he left. "Why don't you stay a while, Ryo? Have dinner with us?"

Ryo blushed, ashamed, and looked away and pulled his shirt back over his head. He looked doubtful and then shook his head and motioned with is hand toward the door, trying to say that he had to go. "G-g-granma waiting."

"Perhaps it is just lack of practice that makes your stutter so bad." Seiji persisted, trying to be polite with the sensitive subject. "I know that others must tease you about it and that it why you don't speak. You can speak to me freely and I won't laugh."

Ryo looked at him with hope growing in his eyes. Seiji could see him considering the offer, weighing the offer in his mind, before nodding. Seiji let himself have a small smile. "Then you must speak to me, Ryo."

Ryo licked his lips. "T-t-thank,"

Seiji interrupted. "Slow down, Ryo. Think about what you want to say before you say it."

Ryo started again. He took a deep breath and, "T-thank you." It came out pitifully slowly, but at least it wasn't as bad as usual. Ryo smiled shyly at his new friend.

"Don't worry about it. Tell me, why do you want to work for us? This is a hard job, I know."

Ryo shrugged. "B-better than ot-thers."

"What others?"

Ryo wouldn't answer him and looked at his feet. He really didn't want to answer that.

Seiji saw the pained look in Ryo's eyes before saying, "I'll see you at school tomorrow. The invitation to dinner is always open, if you decide to come. Bring your grandmother, also."

Ryo froze and looked at Seiji suspiciously. "H-h-how you know?"

"I was told that you live with your grandmother, right? Well, I'm sure my family would like to meet her. Why," Seiji asked, pretending to be innocent. "Is there some reason we shouldn't meet your grandmother?"

Ryo liked his lips, thinking, and then shook his head, no. "S-s-she doesn't l-" Ryo paused and took a deep breath before continuing. "Like v-" Another pause before continuing, "Visiting." It was a struggle to speak, but with practice, it should get easier.

Seiji nodded. "Here's your pay." He handed Ryo a handful of yen. "If your grandmother feels like visiting for a hot meal, tell her that you are both welcome."


Ryo-


Every day that Ryo worked at the Dojo, his speech improved, if only a little bit. Seiji made him feel relaxed and confident. He never laughed and only advised Ryo to speak a little more slowly. A few weeks later, Ryo could speak almost completely without stutter. It seemed like a miracle after suffering his whole life without any kind of help.

Ryo grew close to Seiji, and his family after learning how to behave in the Date house hold. The Date's were very formal, traditional people and they expected guests to act that way, also. Ryo had to be taught almost everything when it came to manners. He wasn't rude, exactly, he just didn't know the details of how to act. Seiji never made the offer again, but it was clear that he was always welcome at the house. Ryo wondered if maybe he should take up Seiji's offer. Grandmother might think it was charity and wouldn't accept, but if he told her it was just a friend from school, she might come with him.

He asked her if she would like to go to a friend's house for dinner, but granma shook her head. "No, Ryo dear." Granma sighed, sliding back down onto her blanket. "I really don't feel well, tonight. I think I'll just rest. You go, if you like."

Needless to say, Ryo didn't go. He stayed with his granma. It seemed to him that lately, she'd been getting tired more and more often. Granma hadn't even stood up in days. By now, granma was far to old to even do the easiest work, and Ryo had taken to worrying about her.




One day, while Ryo was cleaning the hall for Seiji's grandfather, the man who owned the dojo and taught the more advanced classes, Ryo's eyes landed again on the weapon's wall. It was a wall where grandfather Date hung a great display of dozens of type of weapons. His eyes seemed drawn to the weapons, for some reason. Ever since he'd first entered the dojo, Ryo had a hard time keeping his eyes off the weapons. In the center of the wall were two katanas. Ryo wanted to touch them badly, so badly that his hands itched if he thought about the two swords for to long. They were shining and finely sharpened.

Seiji walked in as Ryo ran his finger down the blade of one. "Be careful." Seiji warned him. "Those are very sharp."

Ryo nodded. "Yeah." He was able to speak reasonable well, now, but habit kept him from speaking to much. Then he took the two katanas off the wall and held them in front of him. They felt good in his hands, not perfect, maybe. But very good.

Seiji walked over to him. "Do you use weapons?"

"My father taught me." Ryo told Seiji. He spoke slowly and carefully as Seiji had taught him. He was unable to take his eyes off the swords, it had been so long since he'd held swords like this. He remembered his father showing him how to hold the swords. He had been so little and the swords had seemed immense, far to heavy to hold on his own, so his father had helped him. Ryo couldn't have been much more than eight. It was, if he remembered properly, just before his mom died.

Ryo, with regret, put the swords back where they belonged in the collection on the wall. He had work to do and daydreaming wouldn't get granma food or her heart medicine. Come to think of that, it was medicine day and that meant Ryo had to do extra work after he left the dojo.



Shin-



Shin was carrying the groceries home when he saw Ryo. Shin smiled, he didn't think that Ryo lived near here, but he must or else why would he be here this time of night? It was nearly eight o'clock at night and the only reason Shin was out was because he'd forgotten to go shopping this morning.

The brown haired boy waved and was going to shout out to Ryo, when he saw something odd. Ryo bumped into a stranger and Shin was certain he saw Ryo's thin hand dodge into the man's pocket before he hurried away.

Shin stood in the middle of the sidewalk, absolutely shocked. His eyes were wide and he almost dropped his bag of groceries. Ryo? Stealing?

Shin felt himself slip from shock to anger. Why would Ryo do that? With a determined grimace, Shin followed where he saw Ryo dash away to. He would get answers!

The sky was getting dark and Shin started to get worried when Ryo headed into a local park. In fact, it was just opposite of Shin's home. He followed Ryo as closely as he could until Ryo stopped near the small pond and sat down. While Shin watched, Ryo held the stolen wallet and started to count out a large wad of money.

"Why, Ryo?" Shin couldn't stand it anymore and stepped out where Ryo could see him.

Ryo jumped, startled, and then ashamed when he realized that Shin knew. Ryo looked down at his handful of yen and then back at Shin.

"Why did you steal, Ryo? Please, tell me you have a good reason." Shin took a step toward Ryo, but Ryo instantly sprang up and bolted into the darkness of the unlit park. "Ryo, wait!"

It was to late to catch him, but Ryo had dropped the now empty wallet. Shin went to the edge of the pond and picked up the wallet. He would drop it off in a mailbox, that way it could get back to the owner.

With a scowl at the night, Shin turned to find his way home. This was not like Ryo at all! Then again, what did he know about his friend, anyway? Ryo rarely spoke about himself or his family. He was willing to listen to anything and liked them all well enough, but when it came to himself, Ryo tended to steer the conversation to other things.

Shin made up his mind to talk to Seiji. Seiji and Ryo seemed to have become very close since Ryo started working at the dojo.



Touma-


Touma was going to tutor Ryo at Shu's home. Shu was not rich by any means, but his home felt rich. They lived over the family restaurant and his mom could usually be found in the restaurant cooking and filling the house above with wonderful smells. There was just the feeling of love when you entered the Faun home and Touma loved this place. He spent every waking moment he could here and Shu's family didn't mind in the slightest. They all seemed to have adopted him long ago.

Touma remembered when he was eleven he had fallen at school and the nurse couldn't get a hold of his father. Big surprise. Shu had called his mama and Mrs. Faun practically ran to the school and took him to the doctors for a broken arm. It was Mrs. Faun who paid for the treatment and painkillers. When she and Shu walked Touma back to his house, she saw Touma's dad was passed out drunk on the floor. Needless to say, Touma stayed at Shu's home until his arm was healed because Shu's mom was worried about what would happen to him if he weren't able to take care of himself. The only reason Touma went home was that after several weeks, his dad had apparently noticed he was missing and was looking around for him.

When Touma was thirteen, Mr. Faun took both him and Shu to the father son picnic in the park. It was the first time in his life that Touma had ever had a man to look up to, someone strong and smart who loved his children with all of his heart. Touma loved the Fauns and would do anything for them. He had practically been adopted into the family, as it was, enough that all of Shu's little brothers and sisters called him big brother. He'd even helped Shu to baby-sit brothers and sisters occasionally. All six of them.

Touma told Ryo all of this as they walked to Shu's home after school for a reading lesson. He was just starting to open up to Ryo after all these weeks and starting to admit that he and his dad did not have the greatest relationship.

Touma and Shu both assured Ryo that Shu's mom wouldn't mind having a guest. "In fact," Shu said smiling. "She'll probably invite you to dinner and then to stay the night. Mama loves visitors. She'll wash your clothes for you and tell you to take a long, hot both. My mama babies everyone and treats anyone as if they were her children."

Ryo was doubtful, but Shu and Touma proved to be right when Mrs. Faun greeted him with a hug in her family kitchen. "We're going to study, mama." Shu told the large woman with a kiss on the cheek. "Can we have a snack?"

Mrs. Faun patted her son on the head. "Such a good boy, but I'm glad you're studying with friends. Good thing he has you to help him, Touma, dear, or he'd never get any studying done." She looked at Shu sternly. "Study first and then snack."

"Awwww."


Ryo-



Ryo was a quick study and his reading was coming along very nicely. Touma had his hands full helping Shu with his biology, so Ryo was left to his own thoughts for a little while. He began to notice that it was getting dark and the wind was picking up. He'd promised granma that he would study hard and make something of himself, but he didn't want her to be alone tonight. She had developed a cough lately, but still refused to see a doctor, not even one at the charity clinic. It didn't cost much and, Ryo knew, he could steal the money easily enough. "Sanada's do not take charity!" She firmly insisted.


His mind wasn't on his homework, though. He was still thinking of the other night when Shin had seen him stealing. He'd carefully avoided Shin all day, even though it had hurt. Shin was a good friend and it was him who had introduced him to everyone. He should have stayed and explained to Shin that he needed the money for granma's medicine. But if he did that, Shin might not understand. What if he found out where Ryo and his granma lived and told her what he was doing?

No. That would never do! Granma just couldn't find out that he was stealing. Working at the dojo was good enough to buy food, but medicine was just to expensive. Still, it seemed that Shin hadn't told anyone what he had seen. Ryo groaned. He had to think of something. The only consolation he had was that Shin hadn't seen his other secret. He'd been so startled when Shin had snuck up on him, he'd almost let the fire loose.

It was lucky for Shin that Ryo was able to control it, this time. There were several unsettling incidents in the past where Ryo hadn't been able to control the fire. It sometimes go away from him when Ryo wasn't able to control himself or his temper. People had been hurt and things destroyed when Ryo couldn't control himself, which was to often for comfort.

Ryo was only at Shu's home for two hours before he stood up. "I have to go home. Granma is waiting." His speech was still halting, but now, one really couldn't tell that he'd ever had a stutter.

Shu and Touma didn't try to argue with him as he gathered his things together. "Come on, Ryo." Shu said brightly while they walked into the kitchen. "My mama's making her famous chicken and rice. Think your granma would want some?"

Ryo, startled at the offer, smiled. If he didn't ask then it wasn't begging. Ryo turned and started to say yes, when the world spun violently. Ryo suddenly felt sick to his stomach and everything collapsed.

There was someone looking down at him, but the face was blurry as Ryo blinked. He was laying on his back and someone was trying to talk to him. A couple more heads came into view. "Are you all right?" It was Mrs. Faun. "Ryo, dear, are you all right? Talk to me."

Ryo opened his mouth, but nothing came out. His eyes started to focus and now he knew it was Touma and Shu, who were also looking down at him, concerned.
"I...I'm fine." Ryo tried to prop himself up and grew dizzy almost at once, but he stayed sitting up. Ryo forced a smile for Mrs. Faun. "I'm fine, Ma'am. Just tired."

"Oh," She examined him closely and Ryo could just tell that she didn't believe him. "Maybe you should see a doctor."

Touma added, "Seiji's mom is a doctor."

Ryo shook his head, he didn't need to worry more people about his problems. "I have to go home." He couldn't pay for a doctor anyway. It was nothing, it just meant he had to get some more food somehow. Fainting spells were nothing new for Ryo as he suffered them whenever the hunger got to much.

"Well, why don't you stay for dinner? Touma always sleeps over, but he can't tonight, you're more than welcome to stay with us." Mrs. Faun seemed reluctant to let him go anywhere out of her sight, probably just worried he might keel over somewhere in the streets. She was probably right to be worried.

Ryo was almost drooling at the scent of Mama Fan's cooking, but looked away guiltily. "I should go home. My granma..."

Mama Fan waved away his protest. "Nonsense! I'm sure she wouldn't mind you being a half an hour late." Her smile and the smell of fresh bread won over Ryo. "You don't have to stay long, but please eat something."

'I'll just take some back for granma.' Ryo promised himself, letting Shu and Touma help him to his feet. They had both been very quiet since Ryo had woken up.

"Ryo, man, are you sure you're OK?" Shu sounded even more worried than his momma had. "You just fainted out of the blue." All through dinner, Ryo was asked variations of this, even from Shu's dad who had just come home. Ryo kept insisting that he felt fine and he did after Mrs. Faun's food filled his belly.






Ryo left Shu's house feeling slightly guilty, but happily full for the first time in a long time. Mama Fuan didn't let anyone leave her table after only one helping and she served a heavy plate. Rounded over with rice, chicken, vegetables, and more. A large glass of cold milk and even a slice of chocolate cake for desert. It was Ryo's first take of chocolate in years.

Ryo smiled, clutching the paper bag mamma Fuan had packed for him. Granma would be so happy! Rice, chicken and cake especially for her and granma LOVED chocolate.

The alley was dark when Ryo got there and he heard 'Blaze whine at him. Ryo frowned, his happiness fading quickly. Something's wrong.

"'Blaze? Granma?"

Whiteblaze nuzzled Ryo's hand, but Ryo focused on his granma. She was lying down on the thick blanket that cushioned her from the hard pavement. She looked worse than usual. Ryo saw a trickle of blood from the corner of her lips.

Ryo was instantly on his knees next to her. "Granma? What's wrong?" Her skin was cold, despite Whiteblaze and the small fire at her other side. Ryo shook her gently. "G-g-granma, please wake up." I can't lose her, he thought. Please, I don't have anyone else. I can't lose her! Ryo felt a knot of fear in his stomach. Why did I stay at Shu's? I'm so selfish! I should have come home on time!

Her eyes flickered open and Ryo sighed with relief. "Ryo. You're home."

Her voice was so soft, so weak.

"Granma, w-w-what's w-w-wrong? I...I...brought you f-f-food." His stutter was coming back with the stress. Maybe if she ate...

"No, dear one, I'm not hungry." She began to cough and tiny dots of blood sprayed out of her mouth. She raised a hand to touch his cheek. "Such a good boy my Ryo. You always take such good care of me." Her hand fell and Ryo saw her uneven breathing. Her hand had been so hot.

"'Blaze, s-s-stay with g-g-granma." Ryo told the tiger, which snuggled closer to the old woman, giving her his warmth. Ryo threw parts of a wooden crate on to the small fire and stood. "I'll be b-b-back, I won't be long." Ryo ran as fast as he could, not caring about the drenching down pour that had just begun.

Seiji's mom is a doctor. That was what Touma had said.

He reached Seiji's door, but completely forgot about all the formality that his family demanded. Ryo knocked on the heavy wooden door as hard as he could before shouting at the top of his lungs, "S-s-seiji!" 'Oh, please, they have to hear me.'

A light flashed on and Seiji's dad answered the door, a scowl on his face. "Ryo? What do you want at such an ungodly hour?" He asked crossly.

Ryo, for once, faced the man without fear. "I have to s-s-see Dr. D-d-date, now!"

Mr. Date looked at the soaking wet boy and saw the desperation in his face. "Come in."

By now, Seiji, his mother and grandfather were all awake and stare in at him. Ryo went to Dr. Date. He started to explain in his stutter until Seiji tapped his arm. "Try to slow down, Ryo, we can't understand what you're saying."

Ryo took a deep breath and tried to concentrate as Seiji had taught him. "You've gotta help, my granma's sick, she's coughing up blood! I don't know what to do, and now it's raining, I think she has a fever, she's real pale..."

While Ryo babbled, Dr. Date went to find her bag. Seiji put a hand on Ryo's shoulder to calm him. Ryo was starting to cry, but he didn't care and he couldn't stop talking. "I l-l-left 'Blaze w-w-with her, but she w-w-was so w-w-weak." He was losing his calm and the stutter started to work its way back into his speech.

"Calm down, Ryo." Seiji told him. "My mom will come to help. She's a great doctor."

Ryo managed a watery smile at his friend's reassurance. Dr. Date came back into the room with her coat and her medical bag. "We can use my car." She stated. Seiji came along wordlessly, not needing an invitation.


Dr. Date-


Dr. Date frowned when Ryo directed her as to where to drive. She knew from the news that this was a very high crime rate area. There were always stories of murder, robberies, and prostitution. She liked Ryo, such a sweet, good-natured boy and hated the thought of him living out here.

Ryo told her to stop the car and they all got out in the rain. Dr. Date automatically looked up at the apartment house but was only mildly surprised when Ryo waved for them to follow him into than alley.

The tiger was the biggest surprise, but she tried to ignore it when she saw the old woman. Ryo had been right to be worried, but in all honesty, she wasn't terribly surprised by the state of Ryo's grandmother. She was old and, apparently, had been sick for quite some time. She probably hadn't seen a doctor in years and, Seiji told her, Ryo was forced to steal and beg just to get food for her.

"Seiji, help Ryo carry her to the car."

Ryo and Seiji did as they were told without question. She had to get warm and safe, now.

Ryo sat in the back seat with his lap as his granma's pillow. She hadn't even opened her eyes during the move and it was a bad sign.





"She's got to go to the hospital or I don't think she'll make it." Dr. Date told her husband after Seiji and Ryo had settled the old woman in a spare room. Seiji was gone, though, getting some medicine from a drugstore that might help. "I can't believe Ryo has any money to pay for it, either. He's starving just trying to stay alive. It'll take several thousand yen, at least!"


Ryo-



Ryo listened to Dr. Date through the paper walls of the Date home as he sat at his granma's side. He leaned over and kissed her forehead. "I'll be right back, granma." He knew how to get that kind of money. It was something he had sworn he'd never do, never let himself stoop to doing something like that. But this was for granma. Pick pocketing wouldn't do it this time; he needed a lot and fast.

Ryo crept out to the bedroom window and into the night. If he had stayed, he would have her Mr. Date reply. "Don't worry about the money. We can spare it. We can't just let Ryo do this one his own."




Ryo jumped when the hand landed on his shoulder. It was a slightly older man in an expensive suit. He leered at Ryo. "You look like you could use a few yen, little boy."

It was a fairly common pickup line for the prostitutes around here, and Ryo had heard it a few times. He'd actually been waiting for it for almost an hour as he stood on the streets watching the cars go by. Ryo pushed his hair back from his eyes and looked at the stranger. Very well dressed and a look in his eye that said he knew what exactly what he was looking for and that he'd just found it in Ryo.

Trying to squelch the knot of fear in his stomach, Ryo replied. "A-a-actually, I could use a l-l-lot of yen." He hoped he sounded confident.

The stranger ran a hand down Ryo's chest, down to the waistband of his jeans.
Ryo fought with himself not to run at the man's touch. This felt so very, very wrong. His mind was screaming at him to stop this, get away before you do something stupid.

"Is a hundred thousand yen enough for your night?"

Ryo froze. This was for Granma. He closed his eyes and choked out, "Y-y-yes."





Several hours late, as the sun rose, Ryo staggered back to Seiji's house. He clutched the precious yen in his hand, trying not to feel the shame that was almost crushing him. He felt so dirty and sore. God, it had hurt!

Still, it wasn't as if he'd been a virgin. Rape wasn't uncommon when one lived on the streets and Ryo had been raped once before. Somehow, getting paid for it made it seem worse. Far, far worse.

Ryo rushed into his friend's house, not waiting to knock. "Dr. Date, I got the money!" He yelled out as he ran through the house.

Seiji and his family were waiting from him just inside the door. Ryo frowned at their expressions. Seiji was looking at the floor, but Dr. Date had tears in her eyes with her husband's arm around her. Even grandfather Date looked as if he might be on the verge of tears.

Ryo went cold, but the fire started to build.

Dr. Date took a step closer to him. "Ryo, dear..."

Ryo didn't move. "What's wrong?" He held out his fist of yen. "I got the money you said granma needed. I heard you talking to Mr.Date. You said granma needs money for the hospital."

Dr. Date looked at him and slowly wrapped her arms around him, hugging him tightly. Ryo swayed. No. Please, no. Seiji touched Ryo's shoulder gently. "It's to late, Ryo. Just after you left..."

Ryo jerked violently away from them, trying not to cry. "N-n-no! Where's my g-g-granma!? The fire inside was steadily growing, but Ryo did very little to control it.

"Ryo she's gone." Dr. Date told him softly.


Seiji-


Seiji wanted to cry for Ryo who stood alone in the dark room. Ryo's shoulders were shaking and Seiji knew his friend was probably crying. His mother was openly crying, holding onto his father's arm.

Ryo screamed and fell to his knees, throwing his head back. He screamed and Seiji's mom went to him, alarmed.

"Oh, honey...NO!" When she reached out to touch Ryo, the sleeve of her shirt burst into flame and she screamed with fear.

There was a panicked moment when Seiji grabbed his mom while his dad slapped the fire out. It was a struggle for a while with his mom screaming in fear, but finally, it went out.

Dr. Date sat on the floor, panting heavily, even through the entire arm of her shirt had been burned to ash, and her skin was completely untouched.

Ryo turned and looked at her with horror. "I'm sorry." He whispered, standing slowly. "I didn't mean it."

Seiji looked at Ryo. "What do you mean? What didn't you mean to do?"

Ryo backed away from them and toward the door. He looked so afraid. "I didn't mean it!" Ryo ran out of the house into the rain that had just started to fall.

Seiji followed him to the wall of the family compound. "Ryo!"



Ryo-


He couldn't cry. Nothing felt real, even with his heart being a cold lump in his chest. He was cold all ready from the winter rain and wore nothing but his pants and a T-shirt. He felt like his mind was in a fog. Granma was dead and he'd almost burnt up Seiji's mom. He was monster.

"Dad, stop!"

Ryo stopped at the familiar voice. It was coming from an open apartment window.

"Shut up!" An older man's voice yelled, slightly slurred. There was a sound like shattering glass. "Brat, look what you did!"

Ryo stepped closer, letting worry for a friend pull him back to reality. A cry of pain before a moment silence. Suddenly Touma ran through the door and stumbled to a stop, a few feet in front of Ryo. He turned to face the older man who now stood in the doorway.

"Keep away from me, you bastard!" Touma shouted through swollen and bleeding lips. Both of Touma's eyes were blackened and one was bleeding at the corner.

"Stay out and rot!" The obviously drunk man slammed the door.

Touma stared at the front door. Before he turned and saw Ryo. The two boys stared at each other.

"Hey."

Ryo nodded, not trusting himself to speak. His face must have shone his concern because Touma gingerly touched his lips. "I've had worse than that." Then he clutched his chest and Ryo heard the distinctive wheezing sound. "This is a real bad time for my asthma." Touma gasped. "Shu lives around the corner. Can you help me there?"

Ryo nodded and let his friend put an arm around his shoulder. Together they slowly limped around the block to the restaurant Shu's family owned.




Once Shu saw the state Touma was in he hurried him into the bathroom for a hot bath and some asthma medicine Shu's mom had bought for Touma because god knows that his good for nothing father would never do anything for Touma.

Ryo, seeing that Touma was in good hands, quietly turned and left the house.

When Shu came back several minutes later, he found the door still cracked open and Ryo gone. Ryo hadn't looked very good when he'd come in and Shu was worried. Something told him that they should find him right away.

Shu picked up the phone and started to call around until he reached Seiji. He knew that Ryo worked for Seiji's family, so maybe they might know what had happened to him.



Shin-



Shin was out for a walk in the park that morning when it had started to rain. He strolled home, knowing that his mom was going to give him heck for getting himself soaked if she found out, but what could he do? He enjoyed the rain and, yes, he did expect it to rain when he'd gone out and the black clouds started to roll in. Right now, he must have been an odd sight, smiling like a fool and wandering in the downpour at dawn.

What he wasn't expecting was to run head long into Ryo. They both crashed to the ground. "Oh, Ryo! I'm so sorry, I wasn't watching where I was going!"

Ryo didn't respond and just lay there on the ground, his face buried in his arms.

"Ryo are you all right?" Shin asked, as he leaned over Ryo and gave him a little shake. Shin had spoken to Seiji about what he saw and Seiji hadn't said a word about it. He'd promised to speak to Ryo the next chance he got, though. "Ryo?"

Shin felt hot breath on the back of his neck and looked over his shoulder to find a tiger. Shin blinked, trying to figure out if his mind was playing tricks on him or if this tiger was real. A huge white tiger with bright blue eyes looked down at him and then at Ryo. The tiger nosed Shin out of the way so it could get a better sniff of Ryo and give him a lick.

Whatever the tiger was trying to do must have worked because Ryo groaned and rolled to the side. "White Blaze." He whispered, putting his arms around the tiger's head for a hug. The tiger lay down with Ryo, putting one paw protectively on Ryo's chest.

Ryo stared up at the rain.

Shin gulped and wondered what was going on as this did not seem at all right. Ryo never said anything about a tiger. "Ryo, please, look at me." Slowly, Ryo did as Shin asked. "Ryo, what happened to you?"

Ryo closed his eyes and buried his hands further in White Blaze's fur. "Granma died." Ryo said softly.

Shin didn't know what to say, so he said nothing.

"I did something awful, Shin." Ryo's voice grew quieter as he spoke and he wouldn't look Shin in the eye. "I hurt Seiji's mom and I did something so horrible." He wrapped his arms around his stomach and curled himself into a fetal position.

"Will you tell me what happened?" Shin inched closer to Ryo, keeping a close eye on the tiger. "You can trust me not to tell anyone if that's what you want." Was he talking about stealing?

"You'll hate me if I tell you."

"I will never hate you, Ryo. You're my friend." Ryo said nothing for a moment, so Shin touched his shoulder lightly, but Ryo flinched away violently at the touch. "You don't have to tell me, if you don't want to." Shin went on. "It's getting cold, with all this rain and the wind's starting up. Will you come to my home and warm up?" Shin stood up and tried to move to another subject that might be less painful.

Ryo sighed and nodded, but when Shin held out a hand to him, Ryo refused it and grabbed the tiger's fur to pull himself up. They walked in silence with Shin trying to make small talk, but Ryo not answering. The tiger walked between them and Shin managing not to be very afraid, as Ryo obviously trusted the animal.

Shin's house was on the outskirts of the city with a nice garden planted, though Ryo didn't seem to notice it. "My mom's at work by now and my sister is probably heading for school." Shin said as he led Ryo upstairs to his bedroom. "Why don't you lay down and rest, I'll call the school and tell them you won't be in today." Shin didn't mention that he was going to take the day off as well to take care of Ryo. He knew there was something dreadfully wrong, other than the fact that Ryo's granma had just died. What had he done that had been so awful?



Ryo-


Shin's room was nice. Cleaned and well organized with a large fish tank and many potted plants decorating the place. It was the kind of place Ryo had always wished for in a home. White Blaze lay down at Ryo's feet, but whined worriedly at his friend. Ryo slumped down on Shin's bed and put a hand on White Blaze's head. "Don't worry." Ryo told White Blaze. "I'll be all right. I'll survive."

"It must have been hard to find Touma like that. We all know his dad beats him pretty awful." Shin was standing in the doorway again. "Shu just called, everyone's looking for you Ryo. He said you brought Touma to him and that you ran away from Seiji's house."

Ryo's eyes were burning and he felt his lips start to shake. He didn't want to cry. He really didn't want to cry.

A hand landed on Ryo's shoulder and he looked up at Shin. Shin's soft sea blue eyes looked back at him, worried. 'God, no one should worry about me,' Ryo thought. 'I'm not worth it. I let my own granma die. Couldn't even save the person I love most in the entire world. I sold my self. Granma would be so ashamed.'

"Ryo, are you all right?"

Ryo burst into tears and Shin, confused, caught him, gently holding him while Ryo cried his heart out. Shin didn't know why, but it had always come easy to him to comfort others. Shin touched Ryo's hair, gently running his fingers through the black locks.

"What happened?"

Ryo took a deep breath, to ease the crying, but didn't look up from Shin's shoulder. "G-g-granma, d-d-died." He managed to force the words out. He'd said it earlier, but he needed to say it again.

"I'm so sorry." It seemed inadequate, but there was nothing else to say. Shin sat next to Ryo and let the other boy cry. It was the first time he'd seen Ryo cry. Ryo hunched over, putting his head on his knees and wrapping his arms around his head, as if he were trying to hide.

"All alone." Ryo whispered, seeming to calm down enough to speak properly. "I'm all alone."

"Don't be silly." Shin gave him a smile. "You're not alone. You have all of us."

Ryo shook his head. "Not the same."

Ryo felt a touch on the side of his head and Shin pulled Ryo to lean against him. Ryo looked up at Shin's gentle smile and tried to pull away, but Shin kept around Ryo's shoulders. "Ryo, you know I won't hurt you, why are you fighting me? I'm not going to doing anything, I just want you to have a shoulder to cry on. You are not alone, please remember that. What could have been so horrible that I would hate you?"

Ryo forced himself to relax. If Shin knew what a horrible person he was then maybe he wouldn't want Ryo near him. He didn't want to touch anyone, ever again. "I'm a whore."

Shin froze. He certainly hadn't expected that.

This was it, Ryo knew. Shin would turn away from him and he'd tell the others and they'd all hate him!

Instead, Shin put both arms around Ryo and sounded like he was going to cry himself. "Oh, poor Ryo. Why would you do such a thing to yourself?"

Surprised at the sympathy, Ryo answered. "Granma needed to go to the hospital and I didn't have enough money. I had to get it quick." He gave a disgusted laugh at his wasted efforts. "Didn't even work in the end, she died anyway."

Finally, Shin let go. "I know that it's awful to lose your granma, but why did you run from Seiji? He's very good about that sort of thing and he would have helped you through it. You could have told him about what you did to help your granma and he'd have understood. You did it to save her after all, so it's not so horrible. You did it for a good reason."

"I...I set fire to his mom."

Shin blinked. "What? Why?"

Ryo moved away from Shin. "I didn't mean it. It just happens when I get angry or upset. I can usually control it, but she surprised me when she tried to touch me. I burnt her shirt all up." Ryo sniffed miserably. "She must hate me."

"Ryo, don't you ever run off like that again!"

Ryo was startled to see Dr. Date standing in the doorway of Shin's bedroom with her fists on her hips and looking quite vexed. Her sleeve was still charred and burned away, her hair was damp, hanging in her face from the rain. Behind her were Seiji, Touma, and Shu, all looking worried.

Ryo blanched and looked for a place to run, but the imposing Dr. Date was blocking the only door. "I didn't mean it, ma'am. It just happens when I get upset. I really didn't mean to hurt you." He repeated what he'd said to Shin, but now it sounded desperate and pleading.

She stormed into the room. "You had us so worried! I had my husband put out a report for all the police to look for you, we thought you might have hurt yourself, or tried to kill yourself, you were so upset!" Dr. Date grabbed Ryo by the shoulders and gave him a shake. "Silly boy, I'm not angry with you." Her tone softened and he saw real tears in her eyes. "You mustn't run away from us. We were so scared. Poor Seiji was running all over the city looking for you."

Ryo wanted to pull away, but he was shocked at the same time. She wasn't angry! She didn't hate him! Dr. Date started crying then, holding him tightly to her. "Ryo, dear, you're practically a brother to Seiji. We have a spare room at our house and we'd like you to stay with us for a while."

The others moved in then, surrounding them. Touma patted Ryo's back. "You shouldn't keep things from us, Ryo. If Shu hadn't thought to call Seiji and ask what was up with you, then we might not have started looking for you."

Seiji agreed. "Thankfully, Shin found you and called around to find out what was going on and told us to come here."

Ryo turned his head to look at Shin who looked sheepish. "I thought your friends could help."

With his friends all around him, Ryo saw that maybe his life wasn't entirely wasted after all. After all, at this point, it can only get better. Maybe, with a little help, he could still make granma proud.


End-


Reviews, please.

I've been reading stories about the origins of the Ronin Warriors lately and they inspired me. I honestly do like Ryo, but can't you just see him as a tragic character?

Till next time:)

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