This Flower
By Liz
His eyes opened thirty seconds before his alarm went off. As the rest of his body came awake, he reached out his arm and switched it off, and as he got out of bed he was swept over by a wave of dizziness. His scowl deepened. He shouldn’t have had so much trouble reassembling that engine last night; it had kept him up too late. Depending on sleep for his strength was a serious weakness. He’d have to work on that.
As he pulled on his clothes the lights went up in his room, and he could hear the generators humming as the base came alive. A familiar voice spoke out of the intercom. "We have a visitor today," it said. "Bring your training report."
He picked up the manila folder as he walked out of the room. As he walked down the corridors none of the pilots or technicians glanced at him; they were used to seeing him there.
He entered the exercise facility and saw that Dr. J was not alone. The visitor was tall, with lumpy muscles along his arms and a large, jutting chin. The boy handed his report over to the clacking metal claw, and Dr. J said, "You remember Dekim Barton, don’t you?"
The boy’s mind reached back through the haze of the past few months, searching for a memory of this man in the continual monotony of his everyday existence. Then it clicked: the dead puppy, and this man speaking to Dr. J:
"Retrain him at once!"
"Yes," he said.
"Good," said Dr. J, and he handed the report over to Dekim. His real hand motioned to the equipment in the room.
"Begin your morning exercises."
The boy immediately proceeded to the weight bench and adjusted the barbell. As he began his exercises, he looked over and saw Dekim flipping through his training report, nodding slightly as he did. "Hm, hm," he said, and handed the report back to Dr. J. Then he walked over to the boy and watched him lifting the weights. He bent closer to study the muscles on his arm. "Impressive," he said to Dr. J. "How old is he?"
"Twelve," said Dr. J.
"Hm," said Dekim. "Most impressive. What do you call him?"
Dr. J said, "You can call him Adin."
Dekim leaned down, this time looking at the twelve-year-old’s face. The boy slowed and stopped, letting the barbell come to rest as he peered back over Dekim’s bumpy nose. "Adin," said Dekim very loudly. "I have a question for you." He waited a few seconds, then said, "Do you remember ever having a puppy?"
The boy’s mind jolted back to a cold night…. A ruined city, a scrap of white cloth, and the dead puppy. Sneaking out of the base in the middle of the night to bury it, and trying to bury with it the memory of the little girl. Are you lost? I’ve been lost ever since the day I was born. I’ll give you this flower….
"No," he said.
"A dead puppy?"
He blinked. "Dead?"
Dekim smiled. "Good." He turned to Dr. J. "He has made extremely satisfactory progress. If you carry on at this rate, he should be more than ready for Operation Meteor."
Dr. J nodded. "Very well. I’m glad you approve."
Dekim saluted and said, "I’ll see you at my next inspection visit." Then he left.
Dr. J moved to the door. "Finish with your exercises," he said, "And meet me in the electronics and computer workshop." He left the room, and closed the door behind him. The boy’s face did not change, but his arms moved with robotic strength as he pumped the weights up and down, up and down….
That night, after the corridors of the base were deserted and the red nighttime lamps were shining eerily through all the passages, the boy closed the door to his room and stood for a moment, rubbing his eyes, and then glanced at his bed. The chronometer on the wall read two-thirty. Another one of those reassembly jobs, only tonight he had been further distracted by the regurgitated memories of that dead puppy.
He glanced again at the bed, but hesitated before lying down. After a minute he walked over to a small bare desk in the corner of the room. He opened one of the drawers and lifted out a withered dead flower. It was missing all but two of its brown petals, and the boy held it delicately in his hand to keep it from crumbling further. He stared at it for a moment, trying to remember its original color, and the hand that had held it out to him. Here, I’ll give you this flower….
But then the sharp, patronizing face of Dekim Barton loomed in his vision, and the boy snarled and threw the flower to the ground. It’s fragile stem and petals came apart, and a pile of dead plant material lay at his feet. He swept it fiercely away with his foot, and fell on the bed, feeling as if he was supposed to do something now, cry, or moan, or something. But he couldn’t. He only stared up at the ceiling and felt his muscles aching and his head spinning and his eyes starting to close. Well. Dekim Barton would see. He would be ready for Operation Meteor. He had heard the words of Heero Yuy once: To remember the past is to know the course of the future. Well, he remembered the dead puppy. And he would never forget.
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End
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