Hello all. Ever wonder what is meant by several common Sears phrases? No? Well, play along anyway. I put hard work into this so at least pretend to appreciate it.
Sales Associate says-
May I put this on your Sears card?
Translation-
21.9% intrest sound good to you? Yea, and don't miss a payment either. Then it
goes up to like 35%...
Sales Associate says-
Would you like to purchase a replacement agreement?
Translation-
Yea, do like to throw away money?
Sales Associate says-
This is a great phone. I highly reccomend that you purchase it.
Translation-
This phone pays really good commission...buy it.
Sales Associate says-
Welcome to Sears.
Translation-
Welcome to My Hell.
Sales Associate says-
This is a low quality phone. I don't reccomend that you buy it.
Translation-
This phone pays shitty commission. Don't buy it.
As for customers...
Customer says-
Eye mame iz SAM.
Translation-
I am smarting than all of your manager combined.
Customer says-
I'd like to buy the service agreement also, and heres my Sears card.
Translation-
I AM STUPID!
Customer says-
I'm just looking.
Translation-
I want you to die.
Customer says-
Hi, I'd like to buy this HDTV.
Translation-
Hi, I'm here to fuck with your mind.
And last, and certaintly least, the management...
A manager says-
This is how you should do your job.
Translation-
I eat cock.
A manager says-
Advocate the Sears card.
Translation-
Sell this so I can make more money...*greed*
A manager says-
I'm your manager now.
Translation-
Hi, I'll be hanging around for the next four days or so.
A manager says-
Can you give me a hand with this?
Translation-
Would you like to perform slave labor?
HOME
LenKu Productions 2001 (^_^)