The Terrible Truth About the G-Boys

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I guess I should start from the beginning. It all started one quiet saturday morning, and I was going to annoy, and torture the five (and very kawaii) gundam pilots. (Authors Note: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!) As I, ChibiHaze, skipped merrily along I spotted Relena (Inu!) walking ahead of me. Well it was quite obvious where she was going. Not wanting her to spoil my fun I picked up a nearby rock, and hit her in the head with it. Being who she is, Relena fell. As I stood above her laughing triumphantly, I noticed that she wasn't dead or unconscious. She jumped up, and raced towards the gundam pilots safehouse.

"Oh no you don't!"I shouted as I ran after her. As we all know Relena is clumsy, and annoying, so of course she fell numerous times, and I was able to get ahead of her. I rounded the last corner, and the safehouse cam into view. I ran inside, and locked the door behind me. I heard a loud thud as Relena ran into the door. "Baka!"I shouted at her through the door. I turned around, and looked about anxiously. "Konnichi........wa. Hey where are you guys!"I shouted. The was no one in sight for me to glomp. "Anybody home?" No answer. "Woohoo! Yuy, time to raid your underwear drawer." I giggled evilly as I ran up the stairs to the pilots bedrooms. As I walked into the hallway I noticed there were three doors on each side. I walked into the first one on my left to behold ...........................the bathroom, in all it's glory. After closely examining a curious bottle labeled "Extreme Hold Hair Gel" I walked back into the hallway. I walked up to the door next to the bathroom, and hanging on the door was a little sign that said "Q-chan's Room", so of course I ventured inside. After I wad one jumping on Quatre's bed I immediately hopped over to Quatre's dresser, and opened the drawer. I froze in terror at what I saw inside. I reached in, and picked up a pink, frilly, lacy thong. "Ok. Done with Quatre's room," I said aloud as I slowly backed out into the hallway. When I got back into the hallway I let myself have one horror-oriented shiver.

I walked into the next room which also had a sign on the door. Only this one had said "Trowa's Room". I cautiously examined Trowa's dresser drawers but no pink thongs thank goodness, only hundreds of green turtlenecks. I opened up his closet door, and shrieked in terror. "Barney Porno!?!?"I shouted in disbelief. The closet was full of Barney video's promising Barney's love to show off his sexy body. Stacked from floor to ceiling of the closet were tons of PlayBarney magazines. On the opposite side of the closet was a big box full of barney Porn videos. There was even a Barney Blow-Up Love Doll.(currently deflated.) There was even a girl's highschool uniform hanging on a hanger inside. Needless to say I quickly ran out of the room.

I walked across the hall to the door directly in front of Trowa's room. The sign on the door said "Shinigami". I giggled unconrollably as I ran into the room. There was a crucifix hanging from a nail directly above the bed. "Kawaii!"I shouted as I jumped on to Duo's bed, and glomped his pillow. "I'm in Duo's room. I'm in Duo's room,"I chanted happily in a sing-song voice. I searched the room, and found nothing out of the ordinary. So I felt really good..........that is until I opened the closet. Inside of the closet was Pikachu, Clefairy, Jigglypuff, Charmander, and Evee tied up on the floor. Even though it was against my moral value I untied the pokemon, and shooed them out of the room. "I don't even wanna know why they were in there."I said as I walked out into the hallway. "At least it's not Barney Porn or pink thongs."

I walked to the next door which was in front of Quatre's room. The sign on the door said "Go Away". As i walked into the room I was a bgreeted by a gigantic wallscroll with the gundam Nataku on it, hanging on the wall. No need to think about who's room this is. After a very extensive search of the room I turned up with nothing. "All the other pilots have some little strange hobby," I said as I looked under Wufei's bedsheets again. "Wufei can't be differAAAAAAAAAAAH!" I had banged my elbow on something very hard, and sharp under Wufei's pillow. "Itai! My funnyboooooooooone!!" I reached out with my right (good) hand , and threw the pillow on to the floor. A little picture frame fell with it , and the glass shattered on the floor. With trembling hands I picked up the small picture frame. Inside was a picture of Relena glomping on to someone's arm (probaly Heero's), and around Relena's face was a heart drawn on by red crayon. I quickly got out of that room, and left it in complete, and utter chaos. When I was back in the hallway I shut the door, and leaned against it. I was surprised I could even breathe after that trauma.

I regarded the little voice in my head that "GO HOME!!", and approached the door next to Wufei'. The last room. The sign pon the door this time said "Hell", but someone had crossed it off, and written "Baka". It looked like Duo's hand writing. I softly laid my hand on the doorknob, but right before I turned the knob, and walked inside I heard noises coming from inside. I put my ear against the door, but I couldn't make out the noises. I slowly, and quietly opened the door a crack, and peeked inside. The laying on the floor on their stomachs were Heero, and Wufei. Heero was holding two minature gundam models of Wing 0, and Deathscythe, and Wufei was holding Nataku, and Sandrock. The two pilots were making the gundams crash into each other, and walk over the carpeted floor. All the while making sounds like "Whoosh", "Kapow", and "Kaboom". The gundam Heavyarms was laying off to the side on the carpeted floor. Obviously destroyed from the battle. "I'll destroy you Yuy! How dare you kill Trowa!?"Wufei shouted. Heero just laughed evilly in reply. Oh the horror of it all. But suddenly I lost my footing, and fell face first right inbetween the battling pilots. Both Heero, and Wufei stopped the game, and looked at me in utter contempt.

"Ummmmmm I was just looking for my.......piece of lint I lost last week. Oh here it is! I found it so I'll just go now,"I muttered from the floor. Neither of them said anything or changed the deathglares they were giving off. "Oh hey, can I be Heavyarms?"I asked nervously as I picked up the little, neglected model. Just then Duo, Trowa, and Quatre burst into the room.

"You went through my underwear drawer didn't you ChibiHaze?"Quatre accused angrily, as he held up one of his pink thongs. All the pilots blushed from the sight of Quatre's creepy underwear.

"You went through my porn stash!"Trowa exlaimed. All the pilots turned, and looked at him in shock.

"Oi! You let the sacrifices for Deathscythe get away!"Duo shouted.

"So that's what the pokemon were for,"I said as I backed away from the five angry pilots The all crept forward ready to pounce. "Uh! Ah! Wufei loves Relena!"I screamed. Wufei's face went bright red, and all the other pilots turned, and looked at him as if he had a contagious disease.. I quickly took advantage of the situation, and ran right through the pilots, onward to freedom.I leapt down the stairs with all five in close pursuit. As I neared the front door I heard the sound of Relena's shouts, and she was banging on the door. "Oh thank God!"I said as I unlocked the door. IN bounded a very exhausted, and disheveled Relena. All the pilots stopped, and stared in terror at Relena. All except Wufei that is. He was looking at her like she was a Nataku look-a-like. Relena quickly glomped on to Heero. Wufei shouted some chinese curses, and glomped on to Relena. Heero was pinned to the floor. All Duo, Quatre, and Trowa could do was watch, so I ran out the front door.

I managed to escape. So now I must make the truth known to the world before they find me, and kill me. "Oh hey you guys. Whatcha doin with those knives, and guns eh?AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH"

The End

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Love it? Hate it? I'm still not completely hapy with this one. I want it to be more funny. Is it funny? Please e-mail me with any input.

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