El Qasr: KILL THAT AMERICAN CORK SUCKER!!! KILL! KILL! KILL!

Young Terrorist Class of 2002: AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA!

Taliban Judgement #2:

Steve Buscemi must die!!!

The foothills somewhere in the backwater of America's heartland. A place only trailer park trash, red necks, and Muslim Islamic fundamentalists would be found. The forgotten America, where the rich do not come to play, only the poor, the retarded, or the bitter and spiteful.

Near this place is Camp Al Qaeda, a terrorist training facility for young Islamic suicide bombers and shoe fetish Arabs, plus a large population of American youth disenfranchised by corporate greed, hip hop music, and their own puss filled acne.

Today, what we find is somewhat different from the norm. Today we find a search and destroy party, in a hunt to find a spy. Maybe in the Sudan or Afghanistan, a search and destroy party is common place.

In the American wasteland, they just call it a typical Saturday night.

The hunters, El Qasr Sahli Casbah and his side-kick and man-boy, Babboo, plus a few hundred crazed and brainwashed young Al Qaeda terrosists-in-training, young bomb scouts if you will. But tonight, they aren't looking to get their honor badge in bugleing or sewing, no siree.

Tonight they are attempting to earn their "Kill the American arsehole farking bastiche" badges, repleat with penis pee-hole inserted glass rods, anal plugs, and testacle clamps connected to car batteries.

The hunted, one misplaced Hollywood actor, aka Steve Buscemi.

Let's dive right into the sharmoota, if you will, shall we???

El Qasr: KILL THAT AMERICAN CORKSUCKING BASTICHE!!!

Young Terrorist Class of 2002: AYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYAYA!

In the forest, dawn breaks through the blackest of skies this day, an even blacker day by far, as Hollywood's own Mr. Pink is being chased through the forest by a pack of sand monkeys. If only the terrorists could fly, it would be like a scene out of "The Wizard of Oz" with the flying monkeys.

And wouldja believe, this is the exact same thought racing through the mind of Steve Buscemi as he races past tree after tree, attempting to save his own skinny little anemic hide from the hoards on his ass???

Steve Buscemi: Fucking A-Rab assholes! This is like the scene out of the "Wizard of Oz" with the flying monkeys, except those were real flying monkeys and these are desert apes!!! Fucking Judy Garland ain't got shit on me!

Young Terrorist Class of 2002: AYAYAYAYAYAYAYA AYAYAYAYA AAYAYAYA!

Steve Buscemi: FUCK! There's no place like home! There's no place like home! SHIT!

Meanwhile, towards the rear of the pursuit party, El Qasr Sahli Casbah and Babboo make good time as they scamper through the woods, searching for this farking arsehole they hate so much.

El Qasr: That farking corksucker! He is a farking spy for the US government! He has been following me! But it was his biggest mistake to follow me here, because now, we will catch him, and stake him to a fire ant hill, and pour honey up his rectum! Ha ha ha! I love torturing the Americans!

Babboo: That is a truely magnificent idea oh great Talibanman! Perhaps you can do that to Brian Batson or Jackrabbit this Sunday at Corporate Judgement?

El Qasr: Eh? You think I will be taking it so easy on those two scrotum lickers??? HALLAH! Mohamed spare their souls because I will certainly not! These two camel molesters want my newly won W3 World Heavyweight Championship! I will NOT allow them to take it from me! As the Americans say, "Over some dead Americans body"!

Babboo: I believe it is "Over MY dead body", oh awesome Pasha of Pointlessness...

El Qasr: Yes, but Sahli Casbah is no farking arsehole American, now is he Babboo, you worm feeding toilet cleaner? When I say they will take this title from me over an Americans dead body, I mean, I would rather blow up the farking arena, then allow one of thosemongrel dogs to touch this gold belt. Now that it has come into the hands of a holy son of the Jihad, a Muslim warrior such as the great asbah, it can never again be sullied and blasphemized by unfitting hands.

At Corporate Judgement, I will make sure neither of these camel lickers lives to even see me win the match! Whatever it takes, a shoe bomb, shined up nice and pretty, shoved right up their humus loving asses.... or a pipe bomb accidently placed inside the time keepers underwear.... mayhaps a runaway golf cart careens out of control and cuts Brian Batson off at the knees backstage before the match... or perhaps some unknowing, innocent fan in the front row will pull out a machete and cut Jackrabbit's ugly little head off... whatever it takes Babboo, whatever it takes to not lose the coveted holy grail of wrestling, Sahli Casbah's World Heavyweight Championship!!!

Way up ahead in the forest, things have suddenly gotten quiet. Steve Buscemi is parked under a tree, breathing very heavily, trying to figure out iof he has escaped, and also, how the hell he got into this predicament in the first damn place!

Steve Buscemi: All I wanted was some fucking authentic Middle Eastern cuisine, eh? That's all! Then that towel head started throwing up all over the place, making ME up chuck as well! ( See Jihad #3 ) I don't need that shit, I'm fucking skinny and ugly enough as it is! What if the fucking paparazzi were to catch me throwing up like a college kid at a grain alchohol party!? Awww... who am I kidding, the paparazzi don't follow my twiggly ass around anyways... shit! Those camel fucking douche bags are STILL chasing me!!!

Young Terrorist Class of 2002: AYAYAYAYAYAYAY AYAYAYAYA AAYAYAYA!

Steve Buscemi: SHITE! I thought I lost them.... FUUUUUCK!

Back in the rear again... errr...

El Qasr: When we catch that little American tooth fairy, I am going to shove a broken bottle up his ass and make him sing Rock and a Roll songs!

Babboo: Ooooh! You are truely a devious mind oh great Master of the Anal Torture.

El Qasr: It's just a little someting to get me going before Corporate Judgement.

Babboo: Speaking of which great Casbah, do you think you should even appear at this idiotic wrestling show? Isn't the great El Qasr too important to be seen by the masses of American marks?

El Qasr: It is not that I am too important Babboo, although that is also true. The fact is, the entire W3 organization is petrified of the great "Man from Taliban". How long have I been in the W3, 3 weeks? And how long did it take for the ominpotent one to win the world championship? Faster then any so-called American man, that is for sure. HALLAH! How could not any of these fools not defeat this gimp they call Mike Steele? It is too hard to imagine! And you can believe that these men who are the heads of this W3 do not want El Qasr Sahli Casbah as their champion. Somehow they felt that I would have been defeated by Mike Steele, a stupid and faulty mistake. How much the American bastiches would have rejoiced if Mike Steele had pinned me in the middle of the ring, like he pins his grandmother every night before bed? They would have had parades, they would have been rocking and a rolling in their puny little streets.

But that time has now come and past, and a new era has begun in the W3, the era of THE TALIBAN!!!! Like the Roman Empire, and the Ottoman Empire after it, we now have the era of the Taliban Empire in the W3, and it will last for a thousand years and maybe forEVER!

The wrestling fans must forget all about Corporate Judgement, for their supposed saviors are like the George W. Bush man and 9-11... they already know what is going to happen but they cannot stop it! HA HA HA!

Jackrabbit.... Brian Batson... it is too bad you are both not as tall as the Twin Towers or else I would hi-jack a plane from the American airport and ram it right into the both of you, making you both explode into a roiling ball of flame!

Jackrabbit.... Brian Batson... I cannot bring this ultimate pain to you, so I bring you a pain you are probably both very very familiar with, oh yes! At Corporate Judgement, I will not wreak torture upon you with the "Fuck You America" submission for neither of you two Backseat Boys are worthy enough!

At Corporate Judgement, I will embarass you both, by gerbilling you in front of 50,000 of your American fans! I will give each one of you a gerbilectomy, and it will take a paper towel tube, a bag of pumpkin seeds, and a flame thrower to have those gerbils removed from your very private anuses! So I decree, El Qasr Sahli asbah, W3 World Heavyweight Champion!!!

Babboo: Um, wouldn't it have been easier to just say you are going to beat them silly oh great Sahli Casbah? This whole gerbilling thing might have given people the wrong impression, no?

El Qasr: Who is the W3 World Champion? You or me? The gerbilectomy stays!

Babboo: As you wish, oh awesome Raja of Rumperosity!

El Qasr and Babboo break through a thick set of foliage, as they come upon the terrrist trainees surrounding Steve Buscemi, who is desperately trying to get someone on his cell phone...

Steve Buscemi: Awww shit! Hello? Steven Spielberg??? Hello? Micheal Douglas??? Hello!? Fuck! I'd give my two front buck teeth to speak to freakin' Sherman Helmsley right now... HELP!!!

El Qasr: PREPARE THE GERBILS!!!!

Steve Buscemi: AAAAAAAAAAH!

Suddenly, a huge military helicopter erupts overhead. At the helm, a Baldwin steers her and saves Steve Buscemi's veritable and letral ass from a gerbilectomy.

It opens fire and kills a shitload of terrorist youth before departing.

Alec Baldwin: Hi!

Steve Buscemi: Holy shit Steven Baldwin, I am so glad to see you, man!

Alec Baldwin: I'm Alec Baldiwn dammit, but uh, no problem. Us Hollywood types need to stick together.

Steve Buscemi: Fuck yeah! Let's get the fuck outta here though, and replan this, but for the love of Christ, I'm gonna fuck that A-rab asshole over but good!

Alec Baldwin: Excellent Canteen-boy, excellent.

Steve Buscemi: Huh?

Back on the ground...

El Qasr: I will get you you farking bastiches!!! You cannot escape!!! I claim a Jihad on you! JIHAD!!

Scene fades to black, in order to not confuse this situation any more...

TO BE CONTINUED

El Qasr Sahli Casbah

Your sister is a SCUD!