Disclaimer: I’m sorry my dear friends... but I regret to inform you that I don’t own Gundam Wing. In fact, I own jack squat. The only thing I do own is this very idiotic plot line and the cardboard box I live in ...the one with the company logo... Dammit! I’m back to owning jack squat! What?! Folks, don’t panic, but I had jut been informed that Jack owns his own squats! What is this world coming to?!
***
(A very bored Heero, Duo, Trowa, and WuFei are sitting around a room.)
Fanfiction
A very weird and scary fic that shows what scary things can happen when I have too much free time on my hands... This only took me about 45 minutes to write (usually takes me a couple of days +) and surprisingly I wasn’t hyper, just bored out of my mind... Hence the title. So, don't expect any quality work... not that you ever do...
Quatre: *enters room* Hey, what are you guys doing?
Duo: Just sitting here being bored...
Quatre: Why aren’t you watching TV?
Heero: We would be if a certain baka didn’t break it while we were playing scrabble!
Duo: I didn’t mean to!
Quatre: I’m not even gonna ask how he did that... But why aren’t you still playing?
WuFei: Maxwell got bored so he tried to see how many tiles could fit into his mouth at the same time.
Quatre: And?
Duo: *puppy dog face* Well, you see... I kinda swallowed them...
Quatre: All of them?!
Duo: *nods*
Quatre: That’s okay. *sits down* We can all do something else.
Trowa: Anyone got an idea?
Everyone: *silence*
(15 minutes later)
Everyone: *silence*
Duo: I have an idea! Let’s tell jokes!
WuFei: *sigh* Just shoot me now...
Duo: I got one! Why did the potato cross the road?
Quatre: I don’t know. Why?
Duo: *BIG smile* ‘Cause it has so many eyes!
Everyone else: ...
Duo: Get it?!
Heero: Get what?
Duo: I thought it was funny!
WuFei: You think everything is funny!
Quatre: I don’t get it...
Heero: The only thing to get is that Duo is a complete baka!
Duo: I don’t see you coming up with any jokes!
Heero: Okay, I got one. How many Duo’s does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Duo: This is gonna offend me somehow isn’t it?
WuFei: The answer is: Only one, but you’re gonna have to pay for at least 15 thousand of those things.
Quatre: I get that one... But what about the other one...?
Duo: I don’t mess up that much!
Trowa: It may not cost you that many light bulbs but it sure did cost us that many ice cube trays.
Heero: Ice cube trays?
WuFei: Yeah, remember the time he wanted to be a freezer for Halloween?
Heero: Oh! That’s right.
Duo: Hey, I won the best costume design for that year, thank you very much! Besides it was better than what Heero went as!
Heero: It just so happens that I don’t dress up for Halloween!
Duo: Oh yeah?! Then what do you use that little mermaid costume hanging in your closet for?
Heero: I don’t know what you’re talking about!
Duo: Then I’ll show you! *runs to Heero’s room*
Heero: Hey! Where are you going!!! *chases Duo*
Trowa: Maybe I should go now...
Quatre: Why?
Trowa: I ...uh... have to use the bathroom...
Duo: *comes back with a little mermaid costume* See! Look how pretty and sparkly it is!!!
Heero: *blushing* Give that back!!!
Trowa: Li- little mermaid...
Duo: Ha ha! You can’t get it back!
Trowa: Mermaid!!!
Everyone else: *looks at Trowa*
Trowa: MERMAID!!!!! *falls on floor*
Quatre: *looks down* Are you okay?
Trowa: *stands up* Hello! I’m Mr. Tinkle Winkle! And I want to be your very best friend!
Everyone else: O_o
Quatre: Trowa?
Trowa: Uh-uh! I’m sorry, but you’re mistaking me for someone else! I’m Mr. Tinkle Winkle, remember?
Duo: Sure you are, buddy...
Heero: *hits Duo* I told you not to take stuff from my medicine cabinet anymore!!!
Duo: I didn’t!
WuFei: *sniffs* I’m sorry, Heero... It was me...
Heero: WuFei?
WuFei: I only wanted to know what the pink pills did! *sniff* And Duo wasn’t around! So I ate them myself!
Quatre: Which pink pills?
WuFei: *sniff* The ones that had the pretty pink and white writing on the box...
Quatre: Uh, WuFei? Those were my sister’s birth control pills...
WuFei: *sob* I didn’t know!!!
Duo: *pats WuFei on the head* Shhhh... It’s okay, Wuffie. Don’t cry.
WuFei: *sniff* Why are you being so nice to me?
Duo: ‘Cause *sob* I did the same thing!!!
Duo and WuFei: *crying VERY loudly in the corner*
Trowa: It’s okay little ones! Mr. Tinkle Winkle will make it all better! You don’t have to cry! I’ll just use my magic fairy dust to dry all those tears! *grabs bottle of God knows what from the nearest table* My fairy dust will dry those nasty tears away! *opens bottle and pours it's contents into Duo and WuFei’s eyes*
Duo and WuFei: *cry louder* It burns! It burns!!!
Heero: You just poured my last bottle of powdered acid on them!!!
Duo: I’m so sorry! Have mercy on my soul, dear Lord! I’m sorry the potato joke was so corny!
Quatre: Oh yeah! I never did figure that out!
Trowa: *prances around room pouring Heero’s powdered acid on everything* Mr. Tinkle Winkle will make it all better!!!
Heero: *sob* My poor acid!!! *pulls out gun* I can’t live anymore!!!
Quatre: I get it!!! The potatoes have eyes so they can see that they're crossing the road!!!
Duo: *sniff* I told you it made sense!!!
Heero: *sob* MY ACID!!! *points gun at Duo* None of this would have happened if you didn’t eat our board game!!!
Duo: *sob* I didn’t mean to!
Heero: Now you must pay!!! *pulls trigger*
Gun: *little bang sign pops out*
Heero: Duo! What did you do to my gun?!
Duo: I'm sorry! I was just playing with it a little!
Heero: I told you NEVER to touch my gun!!!
Trowa: Gun!!! Guns are a big no-no! *sprinkles ‘fairy dust‘ on gun*
Gun: *melts*
Trowa: Guns are big evil tools! Play with something nicer, like this magic fairy wand! *pulls out frilly wand*
Heero: *looks at wand* Okay, I’ll play with it... *hits Mr. Tinkle Winkle with it*
Trowa: Hey! Stop! That hurts!
Heero: *continuously hits Mr. Tinkle Winkle with wand* Ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Quatre: *magically flies around room* IT’S THE EYES!!!! THE EYES!!!!
~OWARI
