Bubble-headed progeny of Shinobi stars in this lackluster, by-the-numbers platformer from the same studio behind other hop-heavy fare like Bionicle and the surreptitiously canned Malice. Guided by the spirit of a mortally challenged ninjutsu master, your character, a hopping little Cuisinart referred to only as “Ninja,” stalks shipyard hub worlds, jungle playgrounds and amusement park factories while sticking it to evil ninjas, giant bugs and flame-spitting Dobermans with an assortment of airborne strikes, and spinning attacks. Not content with merely running along surfaces, our little chop-socky elf one-ups Sega’s wall-jogging shadow warrior by grinding rails, scooting up and down half-pipes, riding barrels and manning turrets while pausing for occasional submarine duel and giant robot brawl mini-games. Barring some first-rate head-chopping and awe-inspiring vertical bodily bifurcations, Argonaut Games goes for a fantastical, kiddified approach in the vein of the NES cart, Kid Ninja, by insisting that ninjas kill crates, stockpile coins and metamorphose into giant bowling balls. Poppy, goofball visuals will make the young’uns squeal with delight as long as the ear-pus inducing vocals don’t have them screaming for mercy. An innocuous, lighthearted romp that’s been done, and done much better with plumbers, hedgehogs, and marsupials, what really make I-Ninja more Michael Dudikoff than Sonny Chiba, are the cheap-shot challenges that make you replay levels, only against a clock…woah. Sigh.…
