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US.
Air force
Poems
N
Information
U.S.
AIR
FORCE
OATH
OF
ENLISTMENT
I,
Zoomie,
swear
to
sign
away
four
years
of
my
useless
life
to
the
United
States
Air
Force
because
I
know
I
couldn't
hack
it
in
the
Army
and
because
the
Marines
frighten
me.
I
swear
to
sit
behind
a
desk
and
take
credit
for
the
work
done
by
others
more
dedicated
than
me
who
take
their
job
seriously.
I
also
swear
not
to
do
any
form
of
real
exercise,
but
promise
to
defend
our
bike-riding
test
as
a
valid
form
of
exercise.
I
swear
to
uphold
and
defend
the
Constitution
of
the
United
States,
even
though
I
believe
myself
to
be
above
that.
I
promise
to
walk
around
calling
everyone
by
their
first
name
because
I
know
I'm
not
really
in
the
military
and
I
find
it
amusing
to
annoy
the
other
services.
I
will
have
a
better
quality
of
life
than
all
those
around
me
and
will
at
all
times
be
sure
to
make
them
aware
of
that
fact.
After
completion
of
my
--
snicker
--
"basic
training,"
I
will
be
a
lean,
mean,
doughnut-eating,
lazy-boy
sitting,
airborne
Ranger.
I
will
believe
that
I
am
superior
to
all
others,
and
will
make
an
effort
to
clean
the
knife
before
stabbing
the
next
person
in
the
back
with
it.
I
will
do
no
work
unless
someone
is
watching
me
(and
it
makes
me
look
good),
will
annoy
those
around
me,
and
will
go
home
early
every
day.
I
consent
to
never
getting
promoted
--
EVER
--
and
understand
that
all
those
whom
I
made
fun
of
yesterday
probably
will
outrank
me
tomorrow.
So
help
me
God.
Signature:___________________
Date:________________
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