I believe now the Lord set up this meeting that I might be able to see His works more clearly later in life.
As it turned out, my girlfriend dumped me for a rich guy no more than one month later. No, I never told her about the reading from the gypsy.
At the age of about twenty-one I met my first wife who (bless her soul) nursed me back from an extremely bad trip on acid (the bathtub type - I got about 4 hits in one). We bounced around the country looking for life (or the meaning of it anyway) and wound up in Lead, SD where there was no life at all. I started to work in the mine. We were soon divorced through no fault of hers (I did the cheating).
The first part of my fortune had come true (no marriage till 21).
About two years later, in 1975, I married again. To the same girl I cheated on my first wife with. We had two children during our 19 years of marriage. We would still be married if it weren't for her becoming an abusive alcoholic. She was abusive to alcohol, to me, and, worst of all, to the children. Not physically too much, but mentally all the time. Had she shown some sign of remorse, or an inclination to change or seek treatment, we might have stayed together. However, she wanted nothing to do with rehabilitation at the time. Last year (1998), in November, she died at the age of 46 from alcohol related heart failure. We each reach our personal low at different times and for different reasons and some of us never do before it's too late.
The second part of my fortune had come true (two children).
First brush with Death
During those 19 years of marriage I worked in the mine for Homestake. In about 1978, I was knocked out and fell about 30 feet down a hole and landed on a rock pile. It was a miracle I wasn't killed. I was in the hospital and woke up choking. I told the nurse that I could taste blood in my spit and she said I would be fine. The next time I woke up choking the Dr. was in the room and I spit what I choked up onto the floor. It was a big glob of blood. The doctor, in a rather agitated tone, told the nurse to get me down to X-ray as quickly as possible.
My left lung had been punctured by one of my broken ribs and it was ¾ full of blood. If I had remained there for 15 minutes longer the lung would have collapsed and the blood would have rushed into the other lung drowning me. There would have been no way to help me once the lung collapsed.
They rushed me 50 miles to a hospital where the surgeon was waiting to drain the blood. First he had to wake me up enough to get my consent to do the operation. Understandably, this took a good deal of amphetamine since I was pumped to the gills with morphine up to this point. He no sooner got me conscious enough to talk when I blacked out in a dizzy spell. Later, I found out I had gone into fibrillation and they had to bring in a crash cart and use paddles on me to restart my heart. I did eventually recover from this accident and went right back to work in the mine. Knock me out and throw me down a hole...that won't slow me down!
However, I did wind up with a crushed disc in my lower back that eventually resulted in my having to have it removed in 1981. They fused my spine to my hip with bone (which they scraped off my pelvis) and cement mixed. I was back to work in 10 months and two years later I was once again mining.
I mined without incident until the fateful morning of September 1, 1992. On this day, we had finished drilling our holes and were in the process of loading the explosives when approximately 1 ton of rock flew off the wall which I was standing next to with a loud bang. I thought something had set off the explosives.
It's true you know...you do see your life flash in front of your eyes the moment before death, at least as much as there is time for. I only saw a partial sequence from about 2 years old to say 7 or so. I knew I was going to be killed by the impact when I hit the ground.
At the same time that I realized I hadn't died instantly, I also realized I was in an extreme amount of pain and couldn't move. I was literally buried alive. My head felt as though it was about to explode at any moment and I let out one, long, blood-curdling scream. I kept screaming until suddenly I felt the pressure come off and I started to push with my hands and draw my head back at the same time. At this point, I realized my partners had hold of me and were also pulling me out from under the rock (I found out later this rock weighed 700 pounds and only two men lifted it off me). One of my partners had me under the arms and the other one took my legs. When he grabbed my right foot to lift it up, I instantly knew that it was broken and told him not to move it. He cut my boot open to see if the bone had punctured through the skin. When he found that it hadn't, they moved me to a safer area about 20 feet away.
I sat sort of cradled in the arms of one man and the other went to call for help. My breathing was shallow and irregular since all my ribs were broken and my chest had been separated. I felt near to death and feared for my life since we were 6,900 feet underground and it takes a good while to get to a hospital from where we were. Suddenly, everything started to go black. I told my friend and partner to tell my wife and family that I loved them and they were the last things on my mind before I died. I really thought it was the end. You can't really understand unless you have seen a really old, black and white western...
Well, this 'pard' of mine was a tough old guy and he commenced telling me that he hadn't ruined his back lifting rocks off me just to see me die. He also said that if I insisted on dying he would simply have to put the rocks back on me and leave me here. I chuckled at the thought of him hurting his back further by piling rocks back on me (the laughing really hurt) and quit my whining.
The third part of my fortune had come true (fall, fibrillation,buried - three close calls with death).
The force of the rock had put so much pressure on my right leg as it drove me to the ground that it had fractured the joint at the ankle and broke the fibula so severely it required a steel plate to hold it together along with three pins. This ankle deteriorated quickly to the point it required surgery to replace the joint completely. I now have a titanium ankle joint.
I recalled, to my friends, the experience from my point of view and when I got to the part about screaming "one long blood curdling scream", they started to laugh! I asked them what the heck was so funny and one replied, "Well, when you were under the rock you kept yelling 'OUWEE, OUWEE, OUWEE' over and over. When I heard this I started to laugh and my ribs hurt so badly, but I couldn't stop, and soon I was in tears from the humor and the pain. I pushed the button for more morphine soon after they left and went to sleep.
About the third day after the accident, my wife and I were talking and I told her something that had happened during the accident which up to this point I hadn't told anyone. After I lost my vision, I sat in the dark wondering whether or not I was about to die when I started to hear the voices of the men coming from behind me to get us out of the mine. As they approached, I started to regain my vision as with renewed hope of survival. At first, everything was just black images but the closer they came the better I started to see. Soon, I could distinguish shapes but it was as if I was looking at a negative from a Polaroid. What should be black was white and vice versa. As the men went past me with the stretcher, they also appeared as if in a negative except for one very amazing detail…they all had a bright orange-red, flickering glow around them. My wife said, "Their Auras!". I had heard of people being able to distinguish a person's Aura but never really believed in it. I do now!!!
I now thoroughly believed in the predictions of my gypsy fortuneteller. I had now experienced the three close calls with Death and survived them. Now I thought I would simply cruise into the fortune of the good life that she had promised in my later years. To me this represented wealth and happiness. Pretty much a conflict in terms I know, but still this is what I had in mind.
Little did I know that my fortune and happiness would come in the form of a new belief in myself and the Lord.
My accident in 1992 resulted in total disability, role reversal, pain, suffering, anger, drug addiction, loss of everything we owned, loss of friends and nearly the loss of family. In late 1996, I was busted for possession of meth. My wife and I went into treatment. More importantly though, I was contacted by a long lost friend one day who offered me a deal.
Gary, my friend, said that if I would go with him on a Saturday to work on their new church in town, he would introduce me to a friend who could help me through my difficult times. I had heard him speak of his minister before and naturally thought this was who he was referring to. I gracefully declined the offer. Later that day, my wife asked me what we had talked about. I told her he wanted some help at the church but that I thought it was just a ploy to get me in the hands of his minister. She reminded me what a good friend Gary has always been to us and how I should reconsider his offer. I called back and said I would go.
On the Saturday we were to go, I once again had my doubts about spending a day with him in church...be it Saturday or any other day. However, I decided to go. We had little to talk about during the 50 mile drive to the church and we were both uneasy. Once we got there, my worst fears were realized when he immediately took me into the pastors office and introduced me. He was a man of small stature with the look of someone with vast wisdom and a sense of serenity which enveloped his entire being and sent out waves of peaceful reassurance. We talked. Then we talked some more. And then I was telling him my life story (which is no small deal as you know if you have been reading along). Then we sat. In peace. And serenity. And a sense of relief came over me. Then Pastor Kyle asked me if I wanted to accept the Lord Jesus as my savior. I said, "I want to be happy with my life the way it is." He said, "Do you believe in the Holy Bible?" I said, "Yes." "Do you believe Christ was put on earth to deliver a message to the people?" Yes. "Will you now accept the gospel as the truth and Jesus Christ as your savior?" My final yes.
Pastor Kyle stood on one side of me and Gary stood on the other. They each placed a hand on my shoulders. Pastor Kyle started with a short prayer...who he was, who I was, who Gary was, what we were about to do...then he spoke directly to the Lord and said I had come to accept the trinity of the Father, the Son and the Holy Ghost into my life and that I desired to be born again as a Christian Soldier. He then started a chant to remove the demons which occupied the space within me which was being given to the Holy Ghost to occupy.
I must interrupt this narrative here to tell you how uncomfortable I was over the quick change of format from simple confession to hands-on demon removing. To tell the honest to God truth, I felt like bolting out of the room (amazing how those demons hate to be backed into a corner).
I stayed put because I couldn't move, not because I didn't want to move. Then something very strange started to happen. I began to tingle in all my extremities. First, my fingers and toes were most noticeable. As it spread through my body, I felt a great warmth come over me...not uncomfortable...just comforting and friendly. Then my head started to tingle and the hair on my neck stood up and took recognition of this invasion. I felt a bit light headed and reeled in the headiness of a new high the like of which I had never experienced with any drug. As the feeling peaked, the pastor seemed to sense the completion of his job and his chanting subsided and he released his hand from my shoulder and smiled. I smiled back.
In a minute or two, he asked me how I was feeling. I told him that I was tingling all over. He said, "That is the Spirit of the Holy Ghost which has come to dwell within you." For lack of a better solution to this weird tingling (which in all lasted about 15 minutes but has never entirely left) I did not argue with him. He then asked me if I had any one thing bothering me more than any other one thing in my life. I said, "Yes. I am bothered by my arthritis (rheumatoid, degenerative and big joint) to the point of tears most every day." He told me I no longer had arthritis, as this is a disease that has been created by the devil and is maintained by demons within the tormented soul. Then he said something which made me believe this guy was a total quack. He said, "David, I watched as the demons exited your soul and the demon of arthritis, whom I've seen many times, was among them." I quickly made some irrelevant conversation and Gary and I left to go work in the church.
Later that day, we had to go to a local hardware store to get some carpet glue. Ever since I left his office, I had had this big, silly grin on my face for no apparent reason. When we went to check out, all the cash registers were shut down do to some computer glitch. There were probably 20 people standing around waiting to be checked out by inept, young men and women with hand-held calculators. As I looked around, I noticed that no one had a smile on. As a matter of fact, most of them looked down right pissed off. I mentioned this to Gary and he looked around noticing the same thing to be true. There was, however, one man was talking to his young child in a stroller and he seemed quite happy. All of a sudden, I realized how good I felt. Actually, it was more than good...I felt excellent. When it was our turn to check out, the girl gave Gary back more change than he had given her money in the first place. He handed it back and encouraged her to try again. She got it wrong a second time. He handed it back again telling her to take her time and not let the crowd of agitated customers consume her thoughts. This time she got it right. Oh what a wonderful world this could be!
When I got home that day I told Denise, my wife, some of my day (leaving out the parts about hands-on deliverance and demon removal). She was delighted I had spent a day with a friend and come home with a smile on my face which she had not seen for quite some time.
It took about three weeks until a good storm came up and I suddenly realized I did not get the usual two-day advance warning from my arthritis. Normally, I would have swelled up so badly that I would have been unable to write or hold a pen let alone type on a computer. Still, I was skeptical. It took repeated storms and finally a reaction to the medication I was taking for my arthritis (my body knew I didn't need it any more) before I truly realized I was indeed arthritis free. I have not suffered a day since and it's been almost two years at this writing. Praise the Lord!
Now you can take this for what it's worth, a testament to faith from a non-faithful (at the time) person, or you can let it go. I will say to you though that this story is not over yet so maybe you ought to at least read on.
My court trial was pending and the weight of it hung over my head with a sense of doom that made life and the pursuit of happiness a mere glimmer somewhere off in the distant future. I was looking at five years in the state pen. I decided to resort to something I had not done honestly and selflessly in many, many years. I prayed. My prayers for the last 30 years had been selfish and self centered. I prayed for things such as: Money in times of need, to get well if I was really sick (Lord if you would just let me quit puking I swear I will never drink/do drugs again), etc.. You get the idea. Prayers that were filled with empty promises of service and change.
When the Lord hears our prayers, He answers them and sends an angel with His message or action. Many times, these angels are delayed by demons as they descend the ladder of faith. Do not lose faith in prayer if you do not receive a quick response.
I sat and I prayed one day for almost an hour. Selfless prayer. Prayer in which I did not, and I repeat DID NOT ask for anything for myself. I prayed that the Lord might take care of my family, that He might make things understandable to my mother, that He might allow my friends the ability to forgive my discordance and that He might show me a way to serve Him better. When I finished I said Amen...so be it. Then came the shock of my life; a voice, very soft yet very profound, said to me, "Son, I have saved your life three times and now I have saved your soul that you may use the wisdom you have gained to save the souls of the addicted." And that was all He said...this time. Now one might say, "OK...here's a drug addict in the throws of psychotic delusions...possibly manic depressive." A year earlier and I would have said the same thing. But, I'd been straight for a long while and the way this voice sounded there was no doubt in my mind who had spoken to me.
Later, I had once again been praying. Gary had given me instruction on how to pray, how to ask for the help and protection of angels and how to ask the Lord (without limiting His giving potential) for help. This time I was praying, and had been for quite a while, about what to do when the judge asked me if I had anything to say before he set sentence. I was sitting outside the court room with my wife and family on one side and my treatment counselor on the other for support. Again I asked the Lord to tell me what to say to the judge. Suddenly, the voices in the room seemed to fade and I heard Him say, "Son, I have answered your question already. Thou should do as I have said."
The moment came and I stood sweating bullets in front of the judge. He spoke the words I had been dreading for months. This judge was known for his harsh sentences and after all, look where we were, in South Dakota for cryin' out loud. The first sign you see as you enter the state says, "If you bring drugs into this state you might as well plan on staying for a long time." 93% of our jails are filled with druggies. 10% over the nations average. He didn't let me down. His words rang clear… "You got anything to say before I sentence you?" Nothing polite or judge-like about this guy. I was having a real problem with this since I knew, for a fact, this judge had used drugs himself and had several out-of-state DUI's.
Well, when my voice finally came to me, I heard myself saying, "Judge, I've prayed for an answer to that question for several months and as I sat outside your courtroom the Lord finally answered me. He told me He saved my life three times since I was born and He recently saved my soul so I may serve Him and use my knowledge of addiction to help others overcome theirs." The judge looked up for the first time and looked straight into my eyes as if he had heard the words from the Lord Himself. Finally, he looked away and said, "It is the decision of this court that you shall be incarcerated in the county jail for a period of 15 days and serve the remainder of two years on probation. You shall also pay all expenses for your incarceration and court costs." BANG.
Praise the Lord! For surely His wonders are great!
On the way out, my lawyer (whom I paid $1,000 to plead guilty) said this was absolutely the lightest sentence he had ever seen this judge hand down. Praise the Lord and His wonderful power!
The Lord still speaks to me when I really need Him. But more importantly, He has put people into my life to help and guide me. People have called me up who I haven't had anything to do with for years and said, " I woke up this morning and the Lord told me to call David Irwin." And we talked. And we learned. And we understood.
The following is a prayer which has helped me in times of need:
"Lord Jesus, make me sensitive to others. Let my life be a blessing in all that I do or say. Let my spirit know how You want to love through me, and give me more and more of Your love for others. I choose Your will in place of my own will in every circumstance of my life. Amen."
