I know what happened, I know that I did it, I know it was my fault. But I never admitted it to anyone else. The only person who knows what happened was the person I did it too. I talk to her of course, well not really. Sometimes I'll send her unmarked letters. Usually it's just filled with extra money, she knows I'm trying to pay for my conscious and forgiveness. I even think she's not using the money for herself. I think I heard something about her starting some small foundation called MWM, Mothers Who Miscarried.

I keep playing those moments a thousand times in my mind a minute it feels. I can't shake my head and shake out the memory, though I wished and prayed that I could. Sometimes I wonder if I even would want to be free of it.

It was slick out; it had been raining all week, so of course the pavement would be slippery. Especially under car tires. I should have been paying more attention, but I was running late, again, and I knew if I was late one more time Isaac was going to have my head. Taylor was supposed to have been driving me over, but he decided that I'd needed a lesson learned and left me to ride the bus and somehow talked Isaac into getting him while I was still sleeping.

Well, needless to say, in a fit of rebellion I took his precious car instead. He should never have an extra set lying around in the open. Quite danger, anyone could have picked those up. Namely me.

It wasn't my first time driving, I've been on go-carts thousands of times, and I drive my dirt bike constantly, but I've never driven a big car on a real street before. Of course, while driving I had to have some tunes on, and of course Taylor has to have some damn stereo with a thousand buttons on it and none that just say 'play'. That's Taylor for you.

I should have been watching the road, I should have been watching my driving, I just should have been watching. But I wasn't, and I hit her. I don't think I will ever forget that scream, the way she cried out in fear and agony.

I don't think anyone slammed on the brakes as hard as I did, but I knew my reflexes weren't fast enough. The lady flew up onto my hood, across it, then landed face down on the pavement. Oh God, I was frozen for eternity. My hands shook violently and I couldn't blink.

Forcing myself from the car I stepped out into the raining mist and tried to help the lady. When she and I managed to roll her over I screamed and dropped to my knees. Coming from a very large family, the unmistakable large bulge in the woman's abdomen shouted her pregnancy.

Explaining that I was going to get help I thought of the cell phone in Taylor's car nestled between the driver and passenger's seat. But I quickly shot down that idea; they could trace that call! Running, I found a crappy booth and dialed for emergency help. I didn't give them my name, just told them where to find her, told them of the pregnant lady, and how she was hit by large red truck.

Once I gave them the information I ran back to her. Her eyes were closed and her hands were low holding her stomach below the bulge. I had to swallow the nausea. Rambling I explained to the lady what happened, a large red truck went up over the sidewalk and ran into her then took off. She must have been in shock or just an extreme amount of pain, her head was nodding and she was mumbling in Spanish.

I took off in Taylor's car. Speeding and praying that she would be okay and that I would not get stopped by a cop. Making it to the studio, Taylor cried out about the scratch in the hood. Angry that the blue paint job that he had spent an extra five thousand for on his new model sports car was ruined.

I ignored his tantrum, we all do. He's too sensitive about his stuff. But I can understand why. He saves up forever to buy the nice expensive things.

We worked hard in the studio, and I came up with a sad beat to a new song. No title and no words yet, but we're still working on it.

Ever since that day I always her cries. I still hear her mumbling, and even though I understood very little, I swear she was praying, Dios, Seńor Jesús excepto mi bebé.

Later on I looked up what she might have said. God, Lord Jesus, save my baby.

The first single of the new album was titled 'She Cries.' It talks of a lady getting hit and praying to God not to lose her baby. It was the first song of ours that had lyrics in both English and Spanish.