Screamed someone from the audience. I look out and there are a lot of girls with a poster with my name on it. It’s almost embarrassing. I really wish they wouldn’t do that. I smiled to the crowed.
“Hello!! How are you all doin' tonight…. It’s great to be here in Cincinnati. You guys ready to rock?”
They screamed louder when I talk... as if my speaking voice is something special. More special than my singing voice which they should be cheering for.
“Well, then let’s rock.” Isaac says from his corner.
I smile at him. He is such a good guitarist. Ever since the Ravi book he’s worked harder to be the best guitarist he can be. Man that book pissed me off. Oh I better pay attention I’ve gotta sing.
“Where’s the love it’s not enough.”
Man, Zac should sing this song… he wrote it. I didn’t. Half of the times I can’t even remember the words.
Oh well… God how long is this concert? How many songs are we playing? Please tell me they aren’t all songs that I sing. My throat hurts too much to sing everything. Maybe if we have intermission I can tell Ike to take over and sing some songs. I really don’t have the energy for this.
“C’mon guys, on you’re feet. Jump.”
I jump. God, I don’t have the energy for this tonight. Dang my necklaces are hitting me in the jaw this is not good got to remember not to wear so many. Yuck hair in the mouth this has got to look attractive.
Intermission yay!! I smile at the crowd and follow my brothers off the stage. I wipe my forehead. Man I must look oh so cute.
“Hey Ike?” My voice sounds bad to me. I need to rest it.
“Yeah, Tay? You okay? You don’t sound good?”
“Can we change the order of what we play? My throat hurts. Wh- will you sing More than Anything. I thing may- I think that Zac needs a break also.”
God, there it goes again. Not sure what to say or how to say it. You know Ike ain’t stupid he’s known me for sixteen years. I think he knows what I’m trying to say when I’m saying it. Why am- do I try to make every sentence perfect? I even do it in my thoughts, sheesh.
“Sure. Do you just wanna call it quits early? I don’t want you sick.”
“When you get back I’ll let you know.”
“Okay…. hey Zac….”
He’s gonna ask Zac. I don’t think he ever makes decisions for himself.
Ike is nervous I can tell. He’s playing "More than Anything" in his head I can almost hear it. He’s perfecting it in his head hoping that he doesn’t mess up. I wish he would just trust himself. But no he’s got to think everything to death.
“Ike, you’ll do fine don’t worry just go on out there.”
“But-"
I’m not gonna let him finish that I know what he’s thinking I just don’t want him to say it. He’s thinking that the crowd is out there for me and they’ll be disappointed that I’m not out there. Now I sound selfish but I know what he thinks.
Remember Tay you read his journal the other day. You knew something was up. He doesn’t just have puffy red eyes all of the time. Damn that girl. How rude can you be to tell someone that the only reason they asked for your autograph was because someone, namely me, told her that she had to? God, how stupid is she?
Great he finally got his skinny butt out there. Wow that sounds good. This could almost relax me to the point of sleep. Ike would take that the wrong way though. Got to stay awake.
I wish I wasn’t so sleepy. I wish that we could have tomorrow off but no we have to go directly to the airport and go to NY to do Regis and Kathy Lee. For the third time. They don’t like us we don’t like them why do we keep going on their show? I really don’t feel good. I can’t go on like this.
“Tay?”
I turn; it’s my mom.
“You don’t’ look so good. Ike told me that you didn’t sound good either.”
“My throat hurts.” I say scratchily.
Man I sound like Zac. Not a good thing. I should not sound like a pubescent thirteen-year-old. My voice has already done the change thing.
“I can hear that. Walker.”
She goes off to talk to my father. Probably to tell him that we should end the night. Do a quick meet and greet and then get on the airplane and let me rest.
“Tay?”
Zac is standing next to me.
“Yeah?”
“Don’t you feel good?”
“No… would you mind if we ended the concert early?”
“No, not at all. I don’t want you sick.”
I give a small laugh.
“What?”
“That’s what Ike said.”
Zac scrunched up his face.
“Taylor, Taylor!!” I hear a girl scream from the audience.
Ike looks up and then right back down.
I feel the song increase in speed. Man why did she do that? That was mean. I wish just for once, right now, that I wasn’t popular and that no one liked me. That they’d like Isaac. Just so they wouldn’t say that kinda stuff when he was singing.
His voice is awesome if they would just listen. They didn’t listen to me when we recorded the album. It made me mad that the decided who should sing. I wasn’t pleased that most of the time it was to be me. Me, Zac, and Ike are equal in all, but age, when it comes to music. Oh, mom is back.
“We’ve told the people that we’re leaving right after you three go back out there and do one more song.”
“Kay. Zac, do Man from Milwaukee.”
“Okay. You’re throat hurt that bad?”
“Yeah.”
“Thanks you guys very much.”
Isaac bows and cones toward us.
“That was great, Ike.” Zac said and gave Ike a high five.
“I was a little flat.”
“Geeze Ike, just take the compliment.” I smile.
He maturely sticks his tongue out at me.
“We’re playing Milwaukee and then leaving cuz Tay feels bad. Is that okay?” Zac asks.
“Sure sounds good to me.”
“Although we should just let him get sicker and then sit him next to Kathy lee tomorrow.”
“Oh, that would be great. What do you say, Tay.”
“Great. Except that I don’t want to feel bad.”
We ran back out onto the stage and Zac counted off the song.
I had a hard time singing anything. I hope I feel better by tomorrow. We bowed and left the stage. I hope the fans won’t be all over me tonight. I don’t think I can handle that tonight.
Oh God, here they come. They all huddle around me it feels. Ouch! Who has a hold of my tail? I turn and see a girl pulling at it giggling.
“Would you please not pull that?” I ask nicely.
She giggles and almost hyperventilates because I spoke to her. Thankfully she let go. I sign a few autographs smile and nod to them occasionally talk when someone says something response worthy.
“Can I touch your hair?” Some weirdo asks.
“Umm, you probably don’t want to I haven’t washed it since this morning and I don’t think that this concert did anything for its cleanliness.” I say my voice is almost gone now.
This is not good. Why in the hell would you want to feel someone’s sweat soaked hair?
She smiles. “I really don’t care if it’s dirty.”
Good grief, take the hint I don’t want you’re grubby hands in my hair.
“I wouldn’t touch it.” A fan next to her said.
Oh good, maybe this girl will talk her out of this.
“Why not?”
“Because he doesn’t want you to.”
Ohh, perceptive too.
“He said it was dirty.”
“Another reason not to.”
I handed the girl back her paper. She smiled and left.
“Thanks.”
“No problem. Teenies crack me up.” She smiled.
“I know.”
“You don’t sound like you feel good you better go on to the hotel or wherever.”
I was really liking this girl. Then I noticed that Ike had already signed the paper.
“Ike fan?”
“Yeah.” She blushed.
“Like his song?”
“I loved it.”
“Good. He’s good.”
The girl’s looks at me shocked as if I would never compliment my brother.
“Forgive me for being so shocked, but I always kinda figured that you and Ike didn’t get along well.”
“No, actually we get along great.”
“Wow, learn something new every day. Well, you go and rest it was nice meeting you.”
“Nice meeting you too.”
What do I have the word ‘jerk’ stenciled on my forehead? Only to the Ike fans though I don’t’ understand that. Do I act that mean to Isaac? I don’t think so but what do I know how I seem to people. Man I better get some sleep. I’m not making much sense.
Finally on the plane I can rest. Mom puts a blanket over me and takes my temp ninety-nine degrees. Not much off. I’ll live. I hope I feel better by tomorrow. I wake up after having some whacked out dreams. We’re in NY we are headed to the hotel. Good, I can sleep properly now.
I try to say something, but oh dear, I have no voice. This is going to be a long day.
I wake the next morning in the hotel at five. I’ve had a total of three or four hours sleep. I shower and dress. My head is too full to think.
The shower feels good. Thank goodness all we have to do is the one interview then I can go back to bed. I wonder if I can talk? I attempt to sing in the shower but only a squeaky funny sound comes out. Well looks like no singing for me today.
By the time I’m done Ike is waiting for the shower.
“How you feeling?”
“Not great but passable.” I croak out.
“Well, guess who’s not singing today.”
I nod. WE get to the studio after getting everyone ready. That took a long time. Avie and Mackie were cranky due to the lack of sleep. I felt sorry for them. I’m so happy only a week more till we go back home to Tulsa. I don’t know how much more of this all of us can take.
They set me down in the make up chair. This has got to be the worst part of this. The powder me to death it’s bad enough I can’t breath but they don’t have to add to my problems.
Oh oh, they are attacking me with Eyeliner. I hate that. Always blue. Why is everyone so obsessed with my eye color? Yes, they are blue. You don’t have to make such a fuss over it. A lot of people have blue eyes. It’s not a rarity.
Oh oh, now she’s attacking my hair please don’t make me look stupid. I just hope she doesn’t’ go after my layers with a curling brush. I like my hair layered, it makes it look thicker. When it’s brushed back. I don’t have them to frame my face or anything. That’s girlish. But these people seem to think that’s why---OUCH!
“Ouch!” I squeak.
Man that hurts, hair caught in the earring.
“I’m sorry, are you tender headed?”
“No, I have hair caught around my earring.”
I untangle it for her. I don’t’ trust her. Finally done. I’m let lose. Here comes the real ugly part. The interview.
“…here they are, Hanson.”
We walk out Ike in lead. Zac and I don’t like sitting next to them so we give him the honor.
“Wow… Zac you’re hair is so long.” Kathy Lee says.
Good grief, does it matter? It’s just hair.
“Yeahh, it is. That’s what happens with hair, it grows.” He says sarcastically.
Ike, me, and the fans get it. She doesn’t. How stupid is the woman? After that baby Hanson remark last year Zac doesn’t have a great deal of tolerance for these people.
“So any girls yet?”
Oh God, here they go again.
“No, no girlfriends.”
Ike is lying there’s Katie back home. She’s watching this and probably laughing. After a little more talking they want us to sing our new single which is number one right now.
Thank goodness Zac sings it. I can’t even do harmony. I just play the piano. Afterwards we go back to the hotel and I just crash.
There I’ve let you in on my little world. How boring. Sorry I was sick during this, but hey I’m human, I get sick. Oh well, I’m tired good night.
