Alone At Last

Anna Murphy

This is meant as an alternative ending to "Colorblind" beginning right after Lou overhears Kid talking about Samantha in the bunkhouse. I love Lou and Kid as much as anyone, but this time he went too far. So, this is what could have gone on if Lou hadn't been too upset over the breakup.

Lou stood in front of the bunkhouse door wondering if she'd actually heard what she thought she had. Unfortunately, the look of shock on the Kid's face when he walked out and saw her there was all too telling. It really was over between them and there was nothing she could do about it now.

"Lou!" Teaspoon yelled from the corral.

"Yeah?" Lou asked as she headed toward him, trying not to show on her face what her mind and heart felt.

"I need two riders to head to Willow Springs and pick up some kind of army dispatch."

"Please don't tell me I'm the other rider," Lou thought silently pleading with Teaspoon.

"You and Jimmy are going." Teaspoon told her in no uncertain terms, "You should probably leave now, the army's anxious to get whatever it is."

Lou just rolled her eyes to herself and started to saddle Lightning. "Of all the people to send me off alone with now, he chooses Jimmy?" Lou thought. This day was getting worse by the second. First, Kid chose the wrong moment to brag about his new girlfriend and then she gets sent off to Willow Springs with Jimmy. She didn't have anything against Jimmy personally, she just did not want to be left alone with the only other rider she had ever really been attracted to. Of course, it had always been the Kid from the start, but still, there was some kind of an attraction between her and Jimmy neither had ever talked about.

"I want you to know that this wasn't my idea," Jimmy said softly as they led the horses out of the barn. Lou didn't respond, but she knew that he was telling her the truth. This wasn't something Jimmy would do to her on purpose.

The trip that day was uneventful. The only possible excitement was trying to explain to a young boy on the trail how to get back to Blue Creek. So when it came time to stop for the night, there was nothing for them to talk about except what Lou had overheard and Jimmy had seen that afternoon. Of course, neither one was going to bring it up without risking getting Lou either very upset or uncontrollably angry. So, silence ruled over the meal. Jimmy finally broke the quiet by telling her that he was going to look for some more firewood since it was getting cold and the fire was almost out.

When Jimmy returned half an hour later he was surprised to see Lou just as calm and composed as when he'd left. He'd purposely stayed away longer than necessary so that she could finally shed tears over what had gone through and not be embarrassed by doing it in front of him. Instead of seeing a tear stained face though, Jimmy found her staring intently at the fire.

"Lou, are you okay?" Jimmy asked as he approached her. When he didn't get a response, he tapped her on the shoulder. "Lou!"

"Huh? Jimmy! You scared me!" Lou exclaimed turning to see who was talking to her, but once the shock wore off she went back to looking at the fire.

"Are you okay?" he asked again.

"Yeah, I'm fine. I guess I just got wrapped up in my thoughts." she told him shaking her head at her incompetence.

"All right. You don't want to talk about anything?"

"No, I'm fine," Lou lied to him.

"Okay, good night then." Jimmy said as he spread out his bedroll. He was trying not to show how angry with the Kid he was at that moment. He knew Lou was thinking of him and going over how things could have been different that afternoon, what she had done wrong. It was because of the Kid that Lou could have been hurt if it hadn't been Jimmy tapping her on the shoulder. He found it really painful to watch Lou hold back things in front of him just for she wouldn't embarrass him or herself by talking about what had happened.

"Doesn't she know that she can talk to me about it?" Jimmy wondered watching her try to sleep. As he finished his thought he suddenly winced at the memory of his own failed attempts at romance. He hated to talk about it with anyone. Jimmy ultimately decided to stay out the mess until Lou invited him into it.

"Maybe he didn't really mean what I think he did," Lou told herself. "Of course, he sounded pretty confident about it when I was listening. Maybe its all for the better. If we'd stayed together would he still have gone after Samantha or at least thought about it? Would he have wanted someone else eventually anyway? Someone he wouldn't have to worry about every time she went to work? Someone he wouldn't need to argue with constantly?"

All this began to make some sense to Lou. What if she'd wanted someone else? It could happen! Maybe it would be better for both of them to take a little time apart. Of course, they'd done that already and look where it had gotten her. He went after the first girl he ran into and she was in the middle of the prairie freezing cold and trying to justify why she wasn't more upset over the turn of events. It all gave her such a headache that she gave up trying to sort it out in one night and rolled over to go to sleep. Why obsess over something she wasn't sure would turn out to be so terrible?

The rest of the night passed calmly and Lou and Jimmy were both ready to leave early the next morning. They rode in silence for a while, until Jimmy finally had the guts to say something. "Lou, are you sure you were OK last night? You looked pretty distracted and if I'd been someone else something could have happened to you..." Jimmy said letting his voice trail off as he regretted even starting the conversation.

"Jimmy, I'm fine. I was fine. I was just thinking some stuff through." Lou said biting her tongue. She didn't want to drag Jimmy into her problems.

"You're okay now though?"

"Yeah, I think so."

The two rode toward Willow Springs in a comfortable silence. They occasionally said something, but mostly they were too busy sorting through what had occurred the day before to really get into anything in depth. When they finally arrived in Willow Springs it was obvious that something was going on. There were lots of booths set up in the center of town and a large stage had been built nearby. Something was going on in that town, but Lou and Jimmy had no idea what it was. Teaspoon, on the other hand, did.

"Teaspoon, are you sure that it's a good idea to send those two out to Willow Springs?" Rachel asked shortly after Lou and Jimmy rode away.

"Yeah, I think so."

"Teaspoon...." Rachel began in a warning tone.

"Rachel, they'll be fine. I know you think it's a rotten idea, but Lou need to get out of here before she broke the Kid's neck. Jimmy will keep an eye on her. And before you say anything else, I do know about the festival there this week. I figured the two of them could use a little break and have some fun. It'll take their minds off their troubles." Teaspoon said looking pretty satisfied with his logic.

"I hope you're right."

" 'Course I am. I'm hardly ever wrong about stuff like this."

"Well, I just hope this isn't one of the times you are." Rachel thought as she walked back to the house, "If he is, I'm sure I'm going to be hearing about it for a very long time."

Jimmy strolled into the Pony Express office in Willow Springs to pick up the dispatches shortly after they had arrived. He got quite a surprise when he asked for them. "What do you mean they're not due here until Thursday?" Jimmy exclaimed when he found they'd have to spend the next two days there.

"Jimmy, I swear, I told Teaspoon when they'd be here. I don't know why he sent you two here so early." Jerry, one of the clerks in the office, tried to explain.

"You're absolutely sure there's nothing here for us to take?" Jimmy asked, almost pleading with him. "What are we supposed to do here for two days?" But before he could finish the question, he saw what was going on.

"Teaspoon..." Jimmy muttered angrily.

"Huh?" Jerry asked, looking up from his work.

"Nothing. Just let us know as soon as they're ready, OK?"

"Yeah."

Jimmy found Lou leaning against the post where the horses were tied up. She looked at Jimmy expression, which had changed from annoyed to amused. "What's so funny?" Lou asked smiling at the look on his face.

"It looks like we've been set up," Jimmy told her.

"What are you talking about?"

"The dispatches aren't going to be here until Thursday."

"You're kidding, right?" Lou asked raising her eyebrows.

"Nope."

"What are we going to do until then?"

"I don't know about you, but I'm going to get a room at the hotel. I don't really feel like spending the next couple of nights asleep on the hard ground." Jimmy said heading off to the hotel. Lou followed him wordlessly. There was no point in arguing with him.

Thankfully, the hotel had a couple of spare rooms, so Lou and Jimmy each got a room to themselves. A couple of minutes after Lou closed her door someone was knocking on it.

"Hey, Lou, I was talking to the clerk downstairs about what's going on here and he told me that there's some kind of festival here all week. I was thinking, since neither of us really has any plans for tonight, I was wondering if you'd like to do something together..." Jimmy said, looking almost like he wasn't really sure about what he was saying.

Lou just smiled at him and said, "I'd like that a lot, Jimmy. I'll see you tonight."

With that Jimmy headed back to his room and Lou closed the door after him. "Funny," Lou thought once she was alone, "that almost felt like he was asking me out." Lou's eyes widened when she began to think that there was a possibility that that was what had happened. Of course, he hadn't said anything like that, but Jimmy wasn't exactly the kind of guy to come right out and say something like that. After a couple of minutes of self-debate, Lou decided that there was no point in trying to decide. She figured it would be best to just go with whatever happened and in the mean time, she might as well enjoy it while she could. And with that she headed out to see what types of dresses Willow Springs had to offer.

A couple of hours later Lou was pacing back and forth wondering if she'd done the right thing. "Well, I guess there's no way out of it now," Lou thought checking herself in the mirror. She adjusted her dress and brushed her hair once more sighing at her reflection. Why was she so nervous? She and Jimmy had always been friends and this wasn't going to change anything. They both just needed to know that there was someone out there who they could spend time with and not worry about getting hurt.

Of course, down the hall, Jimmy was thinking pretty much the same things. "This is nothing more than two people going out and having a good time. That's all there is to it. It's nothing more than that." Jimmy kept telling himself. Even with that rousing argument to himself, Jimmy couldn't shake the impression that this evening was going to be different than anything they'd done before. "Well, it's now or never," Jimmy said to himself, making sure his shirt was tucked in and there were no holes or stains anywhere on his clothes. After the last check he opened up the door and headed down to Lou's room.

The knock on the door was so sudden Lou almost jumped out of her skin. She regained her composure quickly though and headed to the door. "You look really nice," Jimmy said as soon as he got a look at her.

"Thank you. You look pretty good yourself." she replied smiling at him.

"I clean up pretty well, huh?"

"You sure do," Lou said taking the arm Jimmy had offered her. "So, where are we going?"

"To tell you the truth, I hadn't thought that far ahead. I guess I'm just too used to eating in the middle of nowhere or fighting Cody for scraps in the bunkhouse."

Lou laughed at the idea of a meal in the bunkhouse. "Good point. How about if we just walk around until we end up somewhere?" Lou suggested as they headed down the street.

"Sounds like a good idea," Jimmy said looking rather proud to be seen with her.

They walked for about half an hour. Lou enjoying the fact that more than a few men in the street gave her a second look and Jimmy looking happier by the minute to be seen with her. They got so caught up in talking about whatever came to their minds that they were practically at the edge of town when they realized they hadn't decided on what to do that evening.

"I think we're at the end of the line," Jimmy said pointing to where the buildings abruptly ended and a the country side began.

"I guess so," Lou said, "What do we do now?"

"Head back and find some place to eat. I forgot all about dinner."

"So did I."

"I guess it's the company I've got," Jimmy said smiling down on her.

"If I didn't know better, I'd think that was a compliment," Lou said nudging him in the ribs.

"Well, you deserve one once in a while," Jimmy said protectively, "I know you don't get them too often in our line of work."

Lou's response was only to smile from ear to ear, partially out of embarrassment at the delivery of the compliment and partially at the compliment itself. She knew it took a lot for Jimmy to show that side of himself. The side that was even more protective of her than the Kid at times. They walked into the first restaurant they passed and sat in a comfortable silence for half the meal. It was Jimmy who finally broke the silence.

"Are you enjoying the meal, Louise?" Jimmy asked. Lou's response was to just sit there and grin at him.

"What? Have I got something on my face?" Jimmy asked suddenly very self-conscious.

"No," Lou said still smiling, "I just don't think you've ever called me Louise before."

"I haven't?"

"No, but I don't mind. It's just interesting to hear you say it. But to answer your question, yes, I'm enjoying it here."

"Good," Jimmy said smiling back at her.

"This is amazing. He's different from the way he normally is tonight. I guess getting away from being "Wild Bill" the gunfighter and the Pony Express for a little while would change anyone." Lou thought as they finished eating.

They decided to go see what was going on at the festival after dinner. They found the town fairly quiet when they got to where everything had been set up. "I wonder why no one's here." Lou wondered out loud.

"The festival doesn't start until tomorrow night, ma'am." someone said from behind them.

"Oh, thank you," Lou said turning around to see who it was.

The old man who was behind them looked very shocked when he got a look at Lou.

"Excuse me, ma'am, but is your name Jennifer?" the old man asked hopefully.

"No, I'm sorry. It's not."

"You just look so much like my daughter. She's just about your age. I haven't seen her since her ma left me that I sometimes wonder if I'd recognize her if I saw her." the old man said looking very depressed.

"I'm very sorry, but I don't know her. My name is Louise."

"Well, thank you very much. I'm sorry to bother you." the old man said walking away. "There is a dance tonight though. It's just over at the church. The really big one is tomorrow night to start the festival."

"Thank you very much." Lou said politely.

"I guess we just found out what we're doing tonight, huh?" Jimmy asked as soon as the old man was gone.

"I think so."

They ended at the church a little while later. They danced for quite a while, enjoying themselves immensely. It felt really good to be out in public without anyone else knowing who they were. Lou didn't have to worry about the Kid trying to keep her to himself or making up some excuse to get away from him for a little while to get some space to breathe.

"Jimmy, I'm going to go get some fresh air. I'll be back in a few minutes." Lou told him after they'd been dancing for a while.

"You want me to go with you?" Jimmy asked.

"No, I'll be all right. It's just kind of stuffy in here." Lou said gently.

Almost as soon as she was outside, Lou got a very strange feeling. She looked around, but didn't see anyone. She walked around the side of the church wondering if someone was watching her there. She realized too late that there was someone watching her. It was the old man they'd seen earlier in the evening. He took out his gun and pointed it at her.

"Jennifer, you need to come home now." he said pointing his gun at her.

Lou didn't even have time to scream before grabbed her throat and squeezed until she fainted. When Jimmy finally realized how long she'd been gone, it was too late. She was gone. There was no way to tell where she'd gone or what had happened to her. He immediately started asking people around the church if they'd seen her. They had no idea where she had gone to, so he ran back to the hotel, hoping that she had gone back without telling him. He knocked on her door, but got no response. It was then that the panic of what could have happened to her began to settle in. Jimmy ran to the sheriff's office, praying that there was someone there. He found a deputy sitting in the office.

It took a few minutes for the deputy to finally believe what Jimmy was telling him. He figured Jimmy had been stood up or his date simply left him, but after he appreciated how worried Jimmy was, things changed quickly. Jimmy went over everything that had gone on that night, not forgetting the old man they'd spoken to earlier.

"You don't mean Grady, do you?" the sheriff asked.

"Look, I didn't catch his name, but he's the only person we talked to tonight. He looked about sixty, but not old."

"That's probably Grady. He went a little crazy after his wife took their daughter to Colorado. He never saw the girl again." the sheriff said, shaking his head.

"Where is he? Where does he live? I want to find him!" Jimmy exclaimed loosing all patience with the sheriff or anyone else in that office.

"He lives in a crummy little place about five miles from here."

"Then why aren't we headed there?" Jimmy demanded.

"Son, that place is hard enough to find in daylight. We can't go bustin' up the place in the middle of the night. We'd all get lost and wouldn't be doing your friend any good. Besides, Grady ain't never hurt a fly. Just sometimes he gets a little crazy when he sees a girl who looks like his daughter. He's not going to do anything to put her into danger."

"He's taken her. Isn't that enough?"

"All right. We'll leave at dawn tomorrow. You can stay in one of the cells if you want to."

"That'll be fine."

Jimmy didn't get much sleep that though. He kept having torturous nightmares about what could have happened to Lou if Grady didn't have her. He also had visions of what could happen to her if Grady did have her and decided to make her pay for what his wife had done. Lou, on the other hand, had been asleep for a couple hours when she finally woke up in a strange room.

"What happened? Why does my throat hurt so much? Why does my whole body sting?" Lou thought when she opened her eyes searching the room she'd been placed in. It looked like a bedroom, she was definitely in a bed. Though where this room was and who it belonged to was something she didn't know.

"Jenny, you're awake. I hope I didn't hurt you too badly." an old man said to her sitting down on the corner of the bed.

"What? Who's Jenny?"

"You're confused, aren't you honey? Your ma must have told you some awful confusing things for you not to remember your own name." Grady said sympathetically.

Lou finally began to recall the events of the evening. She remembered seeing Grady earlier that night when she was with Jimmy. She also knew she had stepped out of the church to get some air when Grady came out of no where and grabbed her throat. Grady had put her into the bed of a wagon that was full of barbed wire that had cut Lou all over her body. The pain of the pricks initially woke her up, but soon she fainted from the pain. Lou figured the best thing to do was keep quiet and go along with whatever Grady told her until she could decide how to get away.

"You go back to sleep and you'll feel better in the morning." Grady said patting her on the head like a child and leaving the room. Lou had prayed that would be her chance to get away, but she heard the key in the lock in the door. It was hopeless until the next morning. The windows in the room had been boarded shut, but enough light came through the cracks that Lou could tell it was still night outside. Lou ended up crying herself to sleep, feeling incredibly small and vulnerable, not having any real way to get out of the house she was being held in. She just prayed that Jimmy would find her soon and get her back to safety.

Dawn couldn't come fast enough for Jimmy. If he'd been more familiar with the territory around Willow Springs he would have gone after Lou in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, what the sheriff had told him was true. There was no way to find the house in the dark if was in the middle of nowhere. Jimmy also wanted to be there when Lou was found. He wanted to know first hand that she was all right and, more importantly, alive. He spent the night going over what had happened and wondered if he'd noticed she was missing sooner what would have been different. He blamed himself for not insisting on going with her. It was something he couldn't get out of his mind the entire night.

"You ready to go?" the sheriff asked Jimmy as he strapped on his gun.

"I've been ready since last night," Jimmy muttered back.

"Let's get going then." the sheriff replied, then, noticing Jimmy's twin guns, told him,

"Son, I appreciate what you must be going through, but I don't want any violence today. This should be a simple matter of talking some sense into Grady."

"When I've got her back, then we'll talk." Jimmy said mounting his horse.

When they arrived at Grady's house no one liked what they saw. There was no sign of anyone stirring inside the house. It was early, but the sun had been up for a while. "This doesn't look good. Grady's almost always up and doing chores by now."

As if on que, Grady appeared in the doorway of the house holding a shot gun at his side. "Mornin' Henry, anything I can do for you?" Grady asked the sheriff casually. "We were wondering if you knew anything about a young lady who disappeared from the church dance last night. She's small, has brown hair, brown eyes. Looks a little like Lydia," the sheriff said referring to Grady's ex-wife.

"Sorry sheriff can't say I've seen her. I wish I could help you out."

Jimmy looked like he was about to explode, but the sheriff stopped him from doing anything. "You mind if we come in for a cup of coffee then? It's been a long morning for us."

"I don't see anything wrong with that." Grady told him, but it was then that he first noticed Jimmy. He recognized him from the night before and knew that they were there for Lou. Quickly Grady leveled the gun at Jimmy and got off a shot. Luckily the sheriff saw what was going to happen and shot Grady just before he leveled his sights. The gun did fire, hitting Jimmy in the arm. Lou woke up at the sound of the gunshots and began to yell.

"Jimmy!!!" Lou screamed at the top of lungs, "I'm in here!!"

No one could hear her though, the room was too far back in the house. The sheriff caught Jimmy as he climbed down from his horse and both headed into the house. Lou had given up on yelling quickly since her throat was still so sore from the attack. Instead she started hitting the door which was still locked. Jimmy and the sheriff stepped over Grady's crumpled body, not making sure if he was dead or not.

To be continued Part II

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