Wild Rose

"It will curl," Catherine Rutherford, formerly Catherine Monroe, growled as she studied the shiny sheet of red-gold in front of her, "I promise you that."

Rose sighed and bit her lip, choosing to let the woman find out for herself that her hair simply would not be forced into curls.

It was a battle of wills between a woman that was every bit as stubborn as Rose's hair, and in the end, the woman won. Rose couldn't hide her surprise when Catherine finally sighed in triumph and held the hand mirror in front of her. Her hair was fashioned in perfect ringlets and pulled back from her face, gathered into an elegant upsweep at the crown of her head. Catherine wound a string of pearls around the base of the curls. Several wispy ringlets spilled around her face and down her back. Rachel and Lou instantly approached with the baby roses, sticking them here and there within the curls. It was quite beautiful, Rose thought.

Catherine really was a professional, Rose thought as the woman neared her with a large powder puff and a reckless gleam in her eye. Rose was slightly shocked with Catherine powdered not only her shoulders and throat but also the top of her bosom. The result was again, impressive. Rose's already smooth skin seemed to glow. A touch of rouge to the bride-to-be's still pale cheeks and lips, and it was time for the dress.

Rose stood still in her corset and crinoline with her arms raised as all six women in the room gathered the rustling satin and lifted it over her. It settled over her head in waves without touching her upswept hair, and fell to the floor. The bodice of the dress fit like a glove, and the hoop skirts stood out beautifully. Lou and Rachel had promised her the loveliest gown to ever walk down a church aisle, and Rose reflected that if they hadn't achieved that, they'd come so close she couldn't tell. The beadwork on the bodice was intricate. Tiny pearls and other pure white adornments glittered when she moved, and yet there were not so many as to detract from the simple elegance of the gown. The bodice was cut like the top of a heart, and modestly high to only hint at the smooth iridescence of the skin underneath. With her hair pulled back, Rose's long slender throat rose like a graceful column of gold tinged ivory from her shoulders. Lou stood on a chair and gently fit the simple veil over Rose's knot of curls. The women decided against covering her lovely face, and instead the garment would drift behind her.

When at last Lou moved to Rose's side to put the finishing touch of the ear bobs on, a horrible realization hit her. Rose's severed earlobe. The girl was so self-conscious about it that Lou had rarely seen it, and therefore had forgotten. Apparently, so had Rose. Even with the wispy curls left hanging for the purpose of hiding it, she hadn't contemplated how she would wear the earrings. None of them had.

Rose sensed Lou's hesitation at turned to ask her what was wrong when it occurred to her too. "Oh," she said weakly, trying to hide her disappointment and embarrassment.

The women stood staring at each other uncomfortably, at an impasse, with no notion of what to do. Rachel felt tears in her eyes when she looked at Rose's fallen face. After her whole speech of the great tradition of the ear bobs it would be cruel for her not to get to wear them. She squared her jaw in determination and marched to Rose's side.

Rarely had Rose allowed anyone so close to her ear. In fact, besides the doctor that repaired it and John, the only person she'd willingly let see it closely was Jamie. She sighed as she remembered his gentle hand touching it, telling her how sorry he was that anyone had treated her with such violence, promising her it would never happen again. Then he'd surprised her by gently kissing the misshapen lobe.

Suddenly she glanced out of the side of her eye at Lou and Rachel, both worried nearly to tears over it. The irony of the situation hit her. They'd given her ear bobs.

The laughter started out in her throat and she tried to swallow it. However, the giggle traveled up through her mouth to her lips and once there, there was no stifling her hysteria. She doubled over, laughing until tears ran down her cheeks. Relief and similar appreciation for the irony as well as the idiocy that none of them had realized the problem with the jewelry sooner, struck all the women and they howled together until tears ran down their faces and their sides hurt.

"I suppose I could clip them onto my nose," Rose laughed, wiping at her tears in hopes of stopping them before they smeared the rouge on her cheeks.

Lou giggled too, "What in the world are we going to do? We can't clip one higher than the other. Everyone would think you had some sort of problem with holding your head up straight."

Catherine drummed her lips with her fingers in thought, "Could you tie a thread around Rose's ear and clip the earring to that?"

"It could work," Rachel murmured and went about doing that. The result was ridiculous looking.

"I look like a pirate," Rose pointed out, shaking her head in rejection. Maybe I could just clip them inside the bodice?" It was sad to think of not wearing them, but at the same time, she wasn't going out in public with a string tied around her ear either.

"No…" Rachel said, her forehead wrinkling as she thought hard about the options. Suddenly her face lit up and she gently pulled the ear bobs off the string and her ear. She seized Rose's hand and clipped one ivory cameo to the button hole at the bottom of her sleeve.

It twinkled and dangled merrily. Rachel sighed in satisfaction, "There we are. They'll just be cufflinks!"

Finally all the older women stood back to study their creation. Rachel and Lou cried again. Rose did not. She looked at herself in the mirror, hearing her father's words as if he'd spoken them instead of her reading them.

Every man has his rose, and once you find a rose in your life, you never let go. I've let go of too many roses, and I'm letting go of this one now to remind you never to do the same.

She looked at her self in the mirror as the other women moved to touch up their own hair one last time and straighten their own finery.

"Mrs. James Noah McCloud," she murmured aloud for the first time. She'd said it in her head countless times since Jamie proposed to her. She smiled. It sounded more wonderful out loud. "Autumn Rose McCloud." She said to the mirror, then with a small smile corrected herself. "Autumn Rose Hickok McCloud." It had a nice ring, she thought.

"How come he keeps walking back and forth like that?" Catherine daughter's Kirsten asked her Uncle Jonathan, tugging on the tall man's pants leg.

Jonathan grinned down and swept the girl into his arms, "Well, I imagine cause he's nervous about walking in front of all those people."

"I'm not nervous! I'm the flower girl!" She proclaimed.

"Yes, you certainly are," Jonathan agreed, "But you're not getting married are you?"

"Well, no. Not today. But I'd marry Jamie. He likes tea parties too."

Hearing this, Jamie glanced in their direction, suddenly smiling. He came to sweep the little girl into his arms and kiss her cheek. She squealed as he swung her around. "If you were a couple of years older, I'd run down that aisle and get Teaspoon to marry us right now."

"Careful Jamie, that kind of talk got you into trouble with Rose when she was younger," Kid reminded him, smiling at the memory of finding Rose crying in the buckboard because Jamie was going to walk Elizabeth Walters home. His smile faded when he thought of Elizabeth's death. It could have just as easily been Rose.

He studied his son. He'd never seen him look so fine as he did today in a finely cut suit and ascot tie. His wavy brown hair was combed more neatly than usual and his eyes had never been such a vibrant blue. Pride swelled Kid's heart and he had to look away before he was reduced to behaving like the women. If Lou found him in tears, he'd never live it down.

Rose looked out the window of the covered coach. Her face was expressionless, and she was ignorant of the chatter of the women in the carriage with her. Lou too, was silent. Both were lost in thoughts that were similar; thoughts of Jimmy and Jamie, of years gone by and years to come. These were her last few moments as Rose Hickok, a name she hadn't been given until she was thirteen, and perhaps she was not quite ready to let go of it yet. But she'd been McCloud too, in heart at least since she became Rose Hickok.

"There's the carriage son. Let's get you inside before it gets here. Time to get this show on the road," Teaspoon grinned, placing a hand on each of Jamie's shoulders and steering him inside. Seth, Patrick, Buck, and Cody all strained their eyes toward the carriage try and get a glimpse of the bride, but the window flaps were drawn closed. Sighing in disappointment, they followed Jamie into the church.

Jamie knew how many people were supposed to turn out, but he still hadn't expected to see the church quite so packed. He imagined the pastor was envious of the crowd they'd drawn. People sat shoulder to shoulder and hip to hip and the ones that couldn't find a seat milled in the back of the sanctuary. He nodded and smiled to friends as he filed past, taking his place in front of Teaspoon at the head of the aisle. Jamie stared at the stained glass window, which was a picture of the resurrection of Jesus, and tried to stop his rapidly thumping heart.

Rose's hand trembled when she put it into Kid's and let him lift her from the carriage to the church stairs to avoid the dust. The women hurried inside to take their seats. Soon, only Lou, Kid, and Rose stood outside on the bright, blustery fall day.

Lou kissed Kid, then placed a hand on each of Rose's cheeks, bringing her head down so she could look her in the eye.

"He's here. I know he is," was all she said before kissing Rose on the forehead and disappearing into the church to signal the bride was ready.

Rose clutched tightly to Kid's arm, closing her eyes and breathing slowly. Her knees felt weak and her stomach churned so violently she wondered if she might throw up right there. Not exactly her notion of a romantic scene.

Kid placed his hand over hers and leaned to kiss her cheek as the wedding march started. Rose glanced into his eyes, eyes that were the same as the man he would give her to, and she suddenly felt the happiness steal through her entire body.

"Want to get married?" Kid asked, his eyes sparkling with tears as he saw the joy in her own silver eyes.

"I do," Rose nodded and Kid motioned for the doors to be opened.

Jamie quickly turned when the doors parted, letting in a blast of chilly air. He felt his heart stop beating as she filled the doorway, the light pouring in from all around her. A collective gasp went up from the crowd, followed by a sigh of appreciation.

She stepped forward, her skirts swishing over the first of the flower petals Kirsten had delightfully littered the ground with, and she sought his eyes from the distance.

The breath left Jamie's body, and he wondered briefly if he'd ever get it back. Those eyes got him every time. Today they were dark, rich silver, shining brightly from her beautiful, dear face. She had never looked more beautiful, he decided as Kid led her slowly-too slowly-past the stunned crowd. He was sure nowhere in the history of the world had a groom stood and waited for a more beautiful bride or amazing woman to put her hand into his.

Lou sat and waited for Kid to join her, watching Jamie's face the entire time. Of all the things she'd done in her life, of all the joys, of all the sorrows, he was her greatest achievement, she knew. This, the tiny child she'd carried through hell and back. Now he stood straight and tall, with all the love he'd ever been given shining there in eyes like his fathers, love he would now give to his own family as freely as it had been passed to him. Pride for him, for this living proof of the life and love she shared for one man that would not ever fade or die, made her heart ache dully. To love until one ached…that was the true nature of love, she decided.

Rose finally let her eyes wander from Jamie's halfway down the aisle as she sought the faces of those she had loved and those who had loved her so well. Patrick stood beside Jamie, his fair face flushed with tears as he sobbed openly with happiness and pride. Seth too met her eyes and winked, smiling warmly. Buck and Cody stood side by side, alternately beaming at her and Jamie. She and Jamie were carrying on their family too…not just Kid, Lou and Jimmy's, Rose realized. Jonathan Monroe and Catherine stood arm in arm, and Rose wondered for a moment how different her life might have been if Catherine had been her mother, if Jimmy had come back for her after the war…she imagined Catherine was thinking the same thing. Cylinda smiled at her, and Rose wondered how much of her brother her aunt saw in her.

Rachel and Lou were beaming from the other side of the aisle, and Teaspoon grinned from in front of the altar. Her eyes met Jamie's again, and she wondered if she'd ever have the will to look away from them again.

Kid stopped Rose just short of Jamie, and nodded to Teaspoon.

Teaspoon hadn't felt so honored or pleased about performing a wedding since the parents of this groom had gathered in a similar church in Rock Creek to begin a life together. He smiled, opened his Bible, and began the words he'd uttered, as well as heard, many times before.

"Dearly Beloved, We are gathered here…"

Rose was too lost in Jamie's eyes to hear much more, and he hers.

"Who gives this woman away to be wed?" Teaspoon asked, and Kid's squeeze of her arm caused her to jump. She looked at Kid with a gentle smile.

Kid smiled back, tears touching his eyes and his voice thick with emotion, "Her father, James Butler Hickok, and I."

Teaspoon smiled, looked down for a moment to hide his own tears as Kid extended Rose's hand to Jamie's. When they tightly clasped each other, Kid placed his own hand over theirs, looking from one to the other. He meant to murmur some meaningful words of love or pride, but his eyes filled up and his lips trembled, and no words would come. With a nod, he went to Lou's side.

Jamie's fingers were strong, tight, and sure around her cold hands and Rose felt the last of the nervousness leave her. Jamie felt his heart slow as well. She was with him now. Without her, he just wasn't himself. To be an incomplete entity without another, that was the true nature of love to Jamie.

Rose watched the facets in Jamie's eyes, warm and fiercely loving, shifting and burning with emotion. A love so great it might have frightened her, had the love in her own eyes been any less savage. To love to the pinnacle of wildness, and yet, to know safe harbor in another's eyes…that was the true nature of love.

Teaspoon continued with the ceremony, knowing good and well that Rose and Jamie were too enamored in each other to pay much attention.

Worlds of communication passed between Rose and Jamie as they stood there, oblivious to the surrounding crowd and world. From today on, they would be one.

Lou watched as they exchanged the rings with trembling fingers, her own hand gently tracing Kid's wedding ring. Like their rings, which both had "ride safe always" inscribed in them, Lou knew Jamie had Rose's engraved with, "My Rose Forever."

A tear trickled down the crease of her nose, and Lou bent her head to wipe it, looking down at her hand clasped in Kid's larger one.

And then she felt it, something she had not felt in many, many years, but couldn't mistake for anything in the world. It centered in two tiny spots on the back of her neck and spread to her cheeks, seeming to pull new tears to her eyes. A warm heat enveloped her and raised chills on her arms.

The burn of a stare, Jimmy Hickok's stare. She was as sure of it as she was of the man sitting beside her now. There was no need to turn around, she knew she wouldn't see him there. She didn't have to, she felt him there among what remained of his family as strongly as she ever had felt him in his life.

Her view was blurred with fresh tears but she would have sworn she saw Rose start suddenly and glance toward the back of the church, as if she felt it too.

Seeing this Jamie smiled and whispered, "The guest of honor."

Rose finally let the tears fall from her eyes as Teaspoon pronounced them man and wife, and invited Jamie to kiss his bride.

Jamie leaned forward, not closing his eyes, and gently took her mouth. Still meeting his eyes, she kissed him back, enjoying the gentleness, and the promise of passion.

Applause and good natured laughter erupted at the length of the kiss and Rose turned a fiery scarlet, but smiled broadly when Jamie turned to present her to the crowd.

"Mr. and Mrs. James Noah McCloud!" Teaspoon announced and cheers and applause nearly rocked the small church in its foundation. Jamie leaned to Rose, whispered, "Come with me," and then started at a dead run down the aisle, pulling Rose with him.

She squealed with delight when he burst out of the church and swooped her in his arms, walking to the dust and spinning them. They both laughed and Rose threw her arms around his neck and shut her eyes tight as the mountains, church door, and main street of town all blurred into one line of colors. Jamie finally stopped and staggered unsteadily, still laughing as others burst out of the church to congratulate them.

He kissed her passionately one more time before returning her to the steps to stand on her own.

The reception at the town hall went by in a blur of music and cake. Rose lost count of the men she danced with. She laughed hard and enjoyed herself. At one point when dancing with Kid he stopped in the middle of the floor, grabbed her arm and brought it in front of his face.

He looked at her "cuff links" then at Rose with a questioning stare. She giggled, told him it was a long story, and he answered he imagined it would be, and on they danced.

Her legs were growing a little numb and it was pitch black outside when she found herself in Jamie's arms, waltzing slowly. She idly realized it was the same waltz he'd led her through at the Christmas dance, shortly before she poured her thirteen-year-old heart out to him. She wondered if Lou had anything to do with that, and when she spotted her, in Kid's arms across the dance floor smiling devilishly, she had her answer.

"Come on, Mrs. McCloud," Jamie whispered in her ear, kissing it gently and causing her to giggle. He took her hand and slowly led her for the door, the perfect picture of boyish innocence. Once clear of the crowd, he bolted into a run again and dragged her behind him, out to the dust.

He kissed her gently under the October moon, and slowly they walked to the hotel in town. The hotel manager refused to take their money when they announced their plans to stay in Sweetwater for one night before heading to San Francisco for their honeymoon, and had given them the finest room in the whole hotel.

Outside the building, Rose suddenly faltered in her stride, her cheeks turning bright red. Seeing this, Jamie stopped her and turned her to face him.

"What?" He smiled, "Rose, are you still worried about this? About what we talked about at the river?"

"No," Rose began in mortification then giggled, "Okay, yes."

Jamie groaned and shook her gently, laughing, "You're driving me to madness with wanting you, and you're still worried if I'm going to be pleased?"

"Something like that," Rose shrugged, then looked up at him through coyly lowered lashes, "Are you really mad with wanting me?"

Jamie sighed and looked at the sky. He laughed loudly and then bent to kiss her forehead. "You're such a tease, Mrs. McCloud." He really liked the sound of that. However, soon his smile faded a bit and he grew serious as he looked into her eyes deeply, "Are you scared, Rose? Is that what it is?"

Rose looked at him for a long moment, searching his eyes. If she wasn't ready to take this step of consummating their love, he'd never ask her to, despite his own madness, as he put it. She breathed in deeply and kissed him passionately. "I'm not scared, Jamie. Not of anything in the world. I have you now."

Taking his hand, it was she who led the way into the building and up the stairs. Jamie fitted her into his arms, as naturally as if she'd been made to fit there, and carried her across the threshold, softly closing the door on the world outside that suddenly disappeared.

Lou stood at the window in her room, the curtains thrown back, and looked outside. The moon was full, and the land lay in a silver light. It was the night's answer to noon she supposed, and infinitely more beautiful than the sun's light. She loved these fields, these mountains. They were such a part of her. Of Kid. And also of Jamie and Rose.

Joy mixed with soberness as she reflected not on the day, but on her life. Life was strange, she thought. To have such rocky, trying beginnings, to know so many youthful years when she felt not a soul loved or wanted her, she ended up with so much love in her life, so much joy. More than her share, she felt sure, and yet she only too happy to be greedy with it.

This time the realization of the presence of Jimmy Hickok didn't come slowly, but rather all at once. She looked out across the fields in the direction of the mountains, not surprised to see nothing. It was when she closed her eyes that that she saw Jimmy sitting there on a palomino. With amazing clarity and calmness she watched as he pushed off his hat and stared back at her. Those eyes had never been so intense as when boring into her own, as they were now. She reached out, as if to bridge the distance, and swore there was gentle pressure on her hand in return.

Then, he replaced his hat, tipped it to her, lifted his hand in a goodbye, and rode for the mountains.

Lou suddenly gasped and opened her eyes, a damp sweat on her brow. Her heart thudded rapidly as she desperately searched the landscape. There was no sign of a horse and rider, but sure enough, a trial of dust settled slowly back to earth.

She never felt the burn of his eyes on her again after that night vision, but by the same token, she also never felt him stray too far from her heart again either.

Jamie's eyes remained open long after the candle went out and the fire burned low, and only moonlight cast an ivory glow on everything.

His heart clenched painfully as he recalled the last few hours. Unquestionably, they'd been some of the most tender hours of his life. He'd been with other women before, but he'd never made love before tonight. Holding Rose, joining physically when already meshed emotionally could have broken his heart with the joy. Their tears had mixed. Never had he imagined such a spiritual, emotional peace in his life, nor the fevered passion that came before.

She was his in every way, and he hers. He'd known Rose was a passionate young woman, but tonight had only scratched the surface of something new and unknown, yet infinitely promising to each of them.

She was laying cradled against his chest, her hair spread like a flame on the pillow behind her. Her back was like alabaster, and he gently traced the groove of it, wanting to know every inch of her better. He leaned forward to kiss her forehead tenderly, stroking a coppery strand of hair turned gold in the moonlight, noting a tiny dimple to the side of her brow bone he'd never seen before. He kissed that too.

Her eyes opened slowly and she smiled lazily up at him. All doubts of pleasing him had left her mind long ago, and now there was nothing but assurance that they were perfect for one another in every way.

"I think I may love you, Jamie," she mumbled sleepily, stretching and sighing with pleasure.

Jamie smiled back down at her, and kissed her again thoroughly. Then he sighed, "I don't know if I'm going to survive this Rose. It almost hurts to look at you I love you so much."

Rose's mouth twitched and although the words warmed her through she raised an eyebrow, "I guess I'll take that as a compliment."

Jamie shook his head, "Here I am composing poetry for you and you'll turn it against me! I forgot I'd married a brat."

She giggled and tickled his side, sending him nearly off the bed when he dodged her wicked touch. He slid to his side with both of her hands pinned within his. Her head was inches from hers on the pillow, and he crossed his eyes as she giggled and tried to tickle him with her toes.

"You are an evil thing, aren't you?" He wondered. She laughed and nodded her head in agreement, silver eyes sparkling with mischief.

Slowly she subsided and lay with her hands still trapped in his. He sighed, and brought one of them up to rest on his heart. She took great strength from the slow, steady beat and set her life's rhythm to it right then.

"It's yours Rose. It belongs to you, and you hold it in your hands. Please God, try to be gentle with it, because with the power to keep it beating, you also have the power to shatter it. I fear I love you too much, Rosie."

Rose's fingertips gently dug into his skin, as if to press closer to the gift he'd made her of his heart. "Trust me?" she asked him the question he'd demanded of her so many times in the past.

"With all my heart," he whispered, smiling weakly, giving her back the words of trust she'd once given him.

"Then I promise, your heart is always safe in my keeping."

Jamie sighed in contentment, and felt he could fly as he reached for Rose.

Tonight no one existed but the two of them, locked in a boundless love.

Tomorrow they would set out to conquer the world. Together.

Copyright 1998-This work is not to be reproduced without the permission of the author

The Way Station
Campfire Tales

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