"my god, it's full of stars"

we are not here tonight
we have left rutebegas in the refrigerator
we are out fornicating
with galaxies and nebulae

"just dial 10-10-.." *THWACK*

we have run out of tape
we need tape to tie you down
we cannot torture you if we cannot tie you down
will you please go to the hardware store for us?

"ben has no advanced knowlege of the questions to be asked."

we have a ruler
we have twelve inches
we are happy with our twelve inches
our ruler is twelve inches long

"C is a member of the 'ALGOL' family"

we are pastie to be grill you
we bave any mottles of algol
we wish to not make much sense
stop taking acid it will ruin our mind

"ingredients: milk chocolate(sugar, chocolate, milk, cocoa butter, lactose"

we buy lots of porn
we don't like reading porn
we make lots of funny collages
with pictures of cumshots

"there was me, that is alex, and my three droobs"

we worship the devil
we kill bunnies in our spare time
we don't kill them because it is fun
it is because they are vampire bunnies

"what do you believe is the cause of your antisocial behavior?"

we have run out of coffee
we have many, many knives
we have bad, bad headaches
shut the hell up right now fuckwit

"to some there is no sight more reassuring"

we have many camels
we are printed on vinyl
we stopped using tylenol because it caused our left hands to explode
exploding hands are not good

"its ultimate future"

we can travel faster than light
we will not demonstrate for you
we do not feel the need to prove ourselves to anyone
leave us alone

"dael. clipper. leterel. rotar. stud. eutow. c/pach. gnit. overand."

we are intelligent
we are made of carbon
we are
do not get philisophical

"what a sobering thought"

we will die
we will sleep
we will perchance dream
this mortal coil is fucked up

"fifteen self-adhesive stamps"

we are not homosexual
we wish to please you
we want you to like us
will being normal make you like us?

"known as a white dwarf, about the size of our earth"

we have not eaten in days
we are trapped by evil men wearing masks
we are frightened that we might be sodomized and killed
please help us

"do not dispose of in fire"

we need companionship
we have been lonely for so long
we are afraid we may hurt someone
if you do not sleep with us

"and that this moment he had been granted to watch as a child, which had never ceased to obsess him, was the moment of his own death"

we are time-travellers
we are attempting to change history
we have not yet succeeded
everything we have done was already determined by fate

"why him (and not you)"

we are horribly dense
we have an event horizon
we really suck
what a leap for a stupid joke

"the mercury-free 9-volt battery (included) will provide 8-12 hours of service"

we are great caesar's ghost
we are a gift horse in the mouth
we are wooden nickels
oh shut up already