Waking up that following morning would have been wonderful. He saw her lying there asleep on the other side of the fireplace; the blanket had curled up around her waist, and knowing his shirt was all that hid her naked body from his eyes had him acutely aroused. But he would have none of it. He pulled his blanket aside and sat up, but no matter how focused he was on his new task, he couldn't take his eyes off the beautiful figure beside him. Her body heaved just slightly in her sleep and he could see her eyelids fluttering just a little. The sight brought out a lazy, lingering smile to his lips and his face softened until his own eyes nearly closed. He had dreamt of this moment for so long, and now when it was finally happening he would ruin it; and on purpose too. He had no specific plan just yet, but before she awoke he was certain he would have something figured out.

Something that would piss her off totally; something that would make her angry with him. If his last memories of her were anger and hatred it wouldn't be too hard to forget her. How could it be!

He crept out of the cave, deciding hunting would be the easiest way to think of something. Something nasty. Something terrible. Something heartbreaking. Something he would regret for the rest of his life, but still something necessary. In spite of the heavy rain he hurried off to find some breakfast. And hopefully get that desecrating idea worked out.

~*~*~*~

When he returned to the cave an hour later, he still had no idea how to make Cami turn on him; it was like his mind refused to accept what he wanted to do. His body hurt from all the thinking and the coming heartache, but he still tried to focus. He deliberately didn't look at her when he entered the cave; he just dropped the rabbit he had caught by the fireplace and sunk down on his bedroll. Both his hands held his head, covering his ears. Think, think, think!

"Buck, are you alright?" Cami's highly concerned voice broke the aggressive thoughts in his head and he looked up, meeting her clear-blue gaze. He couldn't answer her, he just stared.

"Buck? You're making me worried, are you okay?" she asked.

She was sitting across from him with the blanket covering her crossed legs. His shirt still hung over her body, but the two top buttons were undone. Her skin was so smooth and flawless and just looking at her sent that familiar warm feeling down his crotch.

"Uh..." was all he could get out.

"Buck?"

Cami left her bedroll and scooted to his side. He was all wet from the rain, and his hair was lying all flat on his head, sticking to his neck and cheeks like glued. His chin had dropped just a bit and his lips had parted slightly. His eyes were filled with such grief she could barely look into them without feeling responsible. She carefully held her hand out and touched his cheek.

"Are you okay?" she whispered and withdrew her hand after pushing some hair out of his face.

"Fine," he replied stiffly, his face expression still not changing.

"You're shaking," Cami stated and indicated his trembling lips and hands.

His ghostly white complexion scared her and his hair seemed all black now instead of that dark brown she liked so much. She retreated to her bedroll and turned suddenly.

"Get that coat off of you and take your shirt back," she said and hid behind the horses. "My dress is almost dry anyway."

She swiftly changed back into her dress and returned to the fireplace with his shirt in her hand.

"Here, take it."

Buck only stared at her. She was such a sweet and caring individual, how could he ever want to hurt her? He lifted his left arm and took the shirt from her hand. Her fingers brushed against his and he could have lasted lifetime on that warmth. She was all smooth and warm; every inch of her at that. He was growing stiff from the cold rain and needed her help to get the coat off. She gladly peeled it off his lean body and hung it up where her dress had been before; on a pointy rock by the horses. It was a place where it would dry soon if only they got the fire going again. She decided to get right at it.

"Thanks," his soft voice carried to her ears and she turned to face him. His face was still wet, but the color was returning some. "I got us breakfast." Cami could swear she saw traces of a very faint smile when he spoke, and she smiled back. "Great," she said. "Just don't let me see you prepare it, or I couldn't eat it."

Buck's lips parted in a true smile, and his eyes regained the warmth from before. As soon as his body began to unfreeze some he went to skin the rabbit.