Buck raced his horse toward the sound of gunfire. He pulled it up short at the top of a hill, trying to access what was going on below him.

Three men were firing on a wagon. The wagon's occupants, a large man dressed in a tan coat and hat and a tall slim young woman with long straight blond hair, were trying to defend themselves with a single rifle. Even as Buck watched, the man was hit by a well-aimed bullet and fell to the ground. The blond woman scampered to his side, checking him just briefly before picking up the rifle and firing at the intruders. He knew who he'd be helping. He gave his horse a kick and headed into the melee.

He galloped on, his gun drawn and firing. One of the men fell over. Another man turned his attention toward Buck. Buck felt a bullet graze his right arm, but disregarded it as he dove off his horse and took cover behind the wagon, his gun firing once again.

"Get under the wagon!" he yelled. Out of the corner of his eye he saw a flick of long blond hair as the woman did as he said, her rifle firing as soon as she settled underneath. Buck thought there was something familiar about the figure, but he didn't have time to think about it.

One of the men moved his position, exposing himself just briefly. But his partner sent a volley of bullets at Buck and the woman, keeping them under cover long enough for the man to move closer. But the man made a fatal mistake in the next second, by popping up to fire. Buck's bullet dropped him.

The last man decided that the odds were no longer in his favor and retreated toward his horse twenty feet away. Buck chased after him on foot, raising his pistol one last time. The man fell from his saddle. Behind him Buck heard the woman cry out.

"Father!" He turned to see her run to the still form lying on the ground. The voice was very familiar. Buck got his first good look at her.

"Eagle Feather?" He said under his breath, not believing his eyes. Then he realized that the man on the ground must be Bill Tompkins, the storeowner at first Sweetwater, then Rock Creek, during the time Buck rode for the Pony Express. He ran toward the two people. Jennifer Tompkins was lifting her father's head into her lap.

"Jen! Is he alright?" Buck said as he kneeled by the woman's side. She looked at him like he was a ghost.

"Buck? It's you?" she said as she stroked her father's face, then turned her attention back to the man.

"Just my luck. To be rescued by a no good half breed." The man said as he struggled to sit up.

"Good to see you too, Tompkins" Buck answered the crotchety man. Buck was never really sure just how much of Tompkins' attitude to take seriously. Instead he helped the man sit up. Tompkins had been wounded in the shoulder and was bleeding profusely. Buck helped the man remove his jacket so he could examine the wound closer. Thankfully there was an exit wound. Tompkins would be all right, with some bandages and a little rest.

Buck went over to the wagon and rummaged around in it, finding a shirt that he ripped into bandages. He also found a bottle of whiskey that he would use to disinfect the wound. Then he helped Jen move her father over into a grassy area under some trees and he went to work. The young woman helped him, the two working as one. Then she pulled blankets from the wagon and made her father comfortable.

"I can't believe it was you that helped us." She said as she studied the young man before her. Buck was using the numerous branches on the ground to make a small fire. It was late in the day and Tompkins needed some rest. Besides, Tompkins horses had wandered off, as well as his own, during the gunfire. He would go looking for them as soon as the fire was going and he knew the two were settled.

"I could say the same thing. When did you come back to the area?"

"I came back to see my father a few weeks ago. He wanted to go to Sweetwater to check on some the store he still owns there." Buck saw a shy smile cross her face and he returned it.

"That's great. I've been living in Sweetwater. Well, outside it at the old Pony Express station. Been looking after the place for Emma. Lou and Kid have a ranch nearby."

"What were you doing out here? We're at least two days ride from Sweetwater."

"I had to go to St. Joe for Teaspoon. He's Marshall back at Sweetwater again and needed someone to escort a prisoner. I was just heading back."

"Lucky for us you were. Right Father?" The older man mumbled, not wanting to admit that Buck had just saved their lives. Buck just smiled again and shook his head slightly.

"I'm gonna go look for the horses. I'll see if I can catch some fresh meat too. There's a stream just over that rise if you need fresh water." He stood and trotted off in the direction in which his horse had gone.

"You could at least be nice to him. He did save us you know."

"He wouldn't know what to do if I was nice to him." Tompkins muttered.

"No, he probably wouldn't." Jen said as she got up to go to the wagon. She pulled out the coffeepot and a pan, as well as supplies to make coffee and cornbread as part of their supper.

Buck returned an hour later leading his horse and one of Tompkins'. He carried a pair of rabbits, which he and Jen skinned then skewered with green sticks, and set them over the fire to roast. Jen had already made coffee and Buck helped himself as she made corn cakes and placed them in a pan to bake on the coals. Buck sat near the fire to wait, sipping at his coffee. Then she set about bandaging the scratch on Buck's arm, something she hadn't noticed in all the excitement.

"How do you like it back east?" Buck finally asked to break the silence.

"It's alright I guess." Jen answered, glancing at her father who was dozing. "I still feel as though I don't fit in. So I thought I'd come back for a visit, see if it would work out back here, after some time had passed."

"Will it?"

Jen shook her head negative.

"We're just too different I guess."

"So what are you going to do?"

"I'm not sure. I've got a lot of thinking to do." Tompkins stirred and the young woman stopped talking. A few minutes later, their meal was done and the three ate quietly, making small talk when necessary. Buck helped Jen clean up the dishes and they all retired for the night.

Buck woke before the others. Slipping out of his bedroll, he grabbed a clean shirt from his saddlebag and headed to the creek. Just a few yards upstream was a small waterfall, just tall enough to stand under and let the water sluice over him. He looked around, then stripped and waded in. The water was surprisingly warm, not cold enough to raise goose bumps. Buck figured it was because the creek was so shallow. The sun warmed it well enough during the day and it didn’t loose much heat during the mellow nights.

He wasn’t complaining.

He made his way over to the falls, stepping underneath the narrow spout of water, letting the water flow over his head. He tipped his head back and let the water run through his long hair and over his face. It coursed over his body, down his chest and stomach, past his manhood and down his muscled legs. It felt good. He stood there for several minutes, letting the water relax him. Then he knelt down to pull up a handful of sand from the creek bed. He used it to scrub at his skin, scouring road dust and dirt from his body.

Jen lay on her stomach in the bushes watching. She had not been away from her Lakota family so long that she had forgotten how to be stealthy.

In an Indian village, there are few secrets. Nudity, while not flaunted, was also unavoidable at times, and was not something to be ashamed of or embarrassed by. So she had seen naked men before.

But it was different seeing Buck naked, and she wasn’t quite sure why. Was it because she found him attractive?

Buck was not a large man, average height for a Kiowa, and slender. But Jen was not displeased by what she saw. His chest, like his jaw, was finely chiseled, his abs developed by years of hard work, his stomach flat. He was lean and athletic looking. Her eyes dropped lower and studied the muscle between his legs. Jen smiled. Very nice. He turned a little as he scrubbed at his skin, giving her a view of firm, round buttocks. Yes, very nice indeed.

She continued to watch as he rinsed the sand from his body, his hands running over his chest, his shoulders, and his stomach. Jen held her breath as he reached his maleness, his hand rubbing and brushing any sand off that might have made its way there. A tingling sensation took over her body, especially the area between her legs.

She backed out of the brush and headed back to camp. When Buck arrived a few minutes later, she had coffee brewing and breakfast started. A smile crossed her face whenever he wasn’t looking at her.

Buck helped Tompkins into the wagon and hitched his horse and the one of Tompkins’ horses he had found. Then he climbed up beside Jen and they headed toward Sweetwater. It took them a little over two days to get there. Buck didn’t want to push too hard for fear of over tiring Tompkins.

When they did arrive, he drove Tompkins straight to the doctor’s office. Then he took Jen to the hotel.

“I’d let you stay out at the station but…” he started to say.

“It wouldn’t look right.” Jen finished for him. “Besides, I should probably stay near my father.”

“Yeah, that’s true.” He stood in front of her, not sure what to do. He knew what he wanted to do. Over the past two days he had begun to feel something for Jen. He wasn’t sure quite what it was, but he knew he had an overwhelming desire to kiss her.

She solved everything for him. Leaning in she gave him a quick kiss.

“Thank you for everything. It seems as if you’re always there when I need you most.” Then she turned and walked into the hotel. Buck stared after her, watching the way she walked, her shoulders squared off, her chin up, confidence showing whether she felt it or not. He finally turned and swung up on his horse, his eyes going back to the hotel door time after time. With a shake of his head he turned away and headed towards home, stopping at the Marshall’s office and then Kid and Lou’s to let them know he was back.

Sleep that night was slow in coming.

Buck rose early to start on the chores. He wanted them done this morning so he could spend the afternoon with Jen. He started a rabbit stew in the bunkhouse, then headed to the barn.

The station house wasn’t working as an active ranch, but since Kid and Lou’s place was still being constructed, some of the horses they were raising, with Buck’s help, were corralled here. Buck got them fed and watered and cleaned out the stalls. There were a few chickens in the coop and he fed them.

Buck was trying to break a particularly stubborn grey mustang, and he debated taking some time to work with it, but he decided he didn’t have enough time before Jen arrived. He decided to catch a fast shower instead. He went in to the bunkhouse and grabbed a towel and clean shirt, then headed around to the side of the bunkhouse.

He stepped into the shower stall. Teaspoon had built the shower shortly after the Pony Express had started up. The tank above collected rainwater, but during dry periods they were able to pump enough water up from the well to bathe with.

Stripping down and laying his clothes over the stall wall, he pulled on the chain that released the water flow.

The noise of the water covered the sound of the horse’s arrival. Jen heard the water and followed the sound around the corner of the bunkhouse. She could see Buck’s head above the shower stall before he saw her. A slight blush rose to his cheeks when he spotted her leaning against the bunkhouse wall, but he continued to wash, letting the water rinse soap suds from his body.

“You’re early!” he called as he rinsed off.

“No I’m not. I’m right on time.”

“Then I must be running behind.”

“Take your time.” She called back. She walked closer to the shower. Turning her back, she leaned against the wall so they could talk. She heard the water release once more.

“How’s your father feeling?” he asked as he grabbed the towel and began to dry off. She could hear the material as it rubbed against his wet skin.

“He must be feeling better because we had a fight already this morning.”

“What about?” Buck grabbed for his trousers and slipped them on.

“I told him I was coming out here for lunch…”

“…and he disapproved of you coming to see a half breed.” Buck finished for her.

“He’s just overprotective really. He’s afraid I’ll get hurt. Or I’ll want to go back to the Lakota after being around you.”

“I’ll make you want to go back to the Lakota?”

“Like I said, he’s overprotective.”

“Well, he’s never really liked me either.” Buck put his boots on. But his hair was still really wet and he didn’t want to put his shirt on just yet. He reached for the comb. Jen glanced over her shoulder at him.

“Actually, I think he learned to like you. He just won’t let you know it. It would be admitting he was wrong and you know he won’t do that.” She motioned him out of the stall. “I’ll comb your hair out for you.”

Buck hesitated, not used to anyone helping him with such things. But he picked up his shirt and walked out of the stall and they walked around to the bunkhouse porch. He sat on the steps and she sat behind him and began to comb out his hair.

“Anyway, the doctor is letting him move into the hotel tomorrow morning. Doc would have allowed it today, but I talked him out of it. I really wanted to come out here. Maybe that was selfish.” Jen shrugged.

“I’m happy you did.”

“You are? So am I.” Jen pulled the comb through his hair one last time. “Done.” She said.

“Thank you.” He stood and slipped his shirt on. She reached up and began to button it. Buck was unsure what to think about this intimacy, but he wasn’t going to complain. “Lunch should be about ready.”

“What are we having?” They turned and headed into the bunkhouse.

“I made a rabbit stew with wild onions and cattail tubers.”

“It smells wonderful. I haven’t had cattail tubers since I left the Lakota.” Jen looked the bunkhouse over. It hadn’t changed much since she had been here last. It was apparent that Buck was the only one living there, but he kept it immaculate. The only change she noticed was the addition of several Kiowa artifacts. A war drum hung on one wall, a pipe right below it. A hand woven basket sat on the table, and several others holding herbs and dried plants sat on the counter. The smells reminded her of the Lakota village and she felt a twinge of homesickness.

“Rose hip.” She said as she fingered the contents of one of the baskets. “My mother made a tea with rose hips. It was very good.”

“Do you know what else she used? We could make some if you’d like.”

Jen looked over the baskets and saw that he had most of the ingredients. He filled a kettle with water and Jen added the necessary ingredients. Then he set it over the fire to steep. While it heated and brewed, he pulled bowls and spoons from a shelf and sat them on the table, and unwrapped a bundle of biscuits Lou had brought over that morning.

“Just when did you learn how to cook?” she asked to make conversation. The stew did smell wonderful, the spicy aroma making her mouth water.

“My mother died when I was young. Red Bear’s wife taught me. I guess she figure I would never get a wife after Little Bird was taken, and I would have to cook for myself or starve. Either that or she might be feeding me for the rest of her life.”

“Who’s Red Bear?”

“My brother. He’s a Kiowa war chief.” Buck began to ladle stew into the bowls.

“And who is Little Bird?”

“She was to be my wife. But she was returned to the white world when she was twelve summers.”

“She was white?”

“Yes. I saw her a few years back. She has married and lives in St. Joseph.”

“Did you see her when you were there?” Jen was surprised by the twinge of jealousy she felt. But then she had been engaged before too.

“No. Her husband doesn’t really approve of me either.”

“I’m sorry.”

“It’s alright. She’s happy. That’s what counts.”

“Are you happy Buck?”

Buck paused before he answered. It was something he didn’t really think about.

“I’m not unhappy.” He finally said as he handed her a bowl of stew. He watched her as she digested his answer. “What about you Jen? Are you happy? Because I don’t think you are. Not really.”

“I guess I’m not. I don’t fit in back east. I don’t fit in with my father.” She took a sip of the tea he had just poured. “The only person who seems to understand how I feel is you Buck.”

“That’s because we’re both torn between two worlds.” Buck sat next to the young woman. His hand reached out to touch her shoulder in a gesture of comfort and understanding.

“That’s how I feel. Torn. Is there a place that we can feel happy, Buck? A place where we fit in?”

Buck turned the woman to face him. He placed his hands on her cheeks, his thumb brushing away the single tear that rolled down her cheek.

“You always have a place here Jen.”

“Have things changed that much in town? Have they finally accepted you? Or do they still see a half breed and they tolerate you? Do you really fit in here Buck?”

“Some things don’t change Jen, and there’s nothing anyone can do to make that happen. Sometimes you have to accept what is given and learn to work with it. The townspeople tolerate me, yes. But some have truly accepted me. And I have a group of people that I call family. They see me for who I am, not what I am. They don’t judge me by my heritage, but accept and love my spirit. They would welcome you with open arms for who you are Jen.”

“What about you Buck?”

“What do you mean?”

“Do you welcome me with open arms?”

He answered her with a kiss.

Buck was the one to break the kiss. Jen’s mouth followed his as he pulled away, not wanting to stop. But then they both looked a little embarrassed.

“I’m sorry…” They both said as one, then burst into laughter. Her hand rested on his chest as they laughed. They returned to their meal. Buck cleared away the bowls when they finished and Jen helped him wash them and put them away. At one point he turned and found himself face to face with her. He resisted the urge to kiss her again.

What’s going on Buck? He asked himself. This is Jen. What are you doing?

“I thought maybe we could go for a ride. It’s a lot cooler down by the creek. We could stop and see Kid and Lou on the way. I know they’d like to see you again.”

“I’d like to see them, too.”

But the pair never made it there that afternoon. As they finished cleaning up from their noon meal, Jen got a mischievous grin on her face. She didn’t know why she did it, it was certainly unlike her, but she did it anyway. It was as if some stranger took over her body.

Jen reached over and picked up a glass of water from the table. Tapping Buck on the shoulder she dumped the glass over his head. There was a brief pause, then Buck’s face split into a smile. Jen broke into a run, Buck hot on her heels.

She was fast, keeping ahead of him for several yards. He finally caught up to her as she entered the prairie grasses near the stationhouse. His arms managed to grab her around the waist and they both went tumbling to the ground. They were both breathing heavy from laughter and running.

But as they caught their breath, Buck found his head dipping, beyond any conscious control, and their lips met. When her hand came up behind his head to encourage him, the kiss became more passionate. His lips parted and his tongue entered her mouth, running along her teeth. He sucked on her lower lip and her tongue joined his. Her hand caught his and brought it to her breast, then unbuttoned a few of the buttons on his shirt, so she could run her hand over his smooth chest. When he didn’t move to unbutton her blouse, she did it instead, pulling her camisole aside so his hand could find her bare breast.

His hand cupped her breast, his fingers finding her nipple and gently pinching it. His mouth moved feather soft across her neck down to her chest, where he took in her breast, kissing it, sucking gently, her nipple hardening in his mouth. Her hand dropped between his legs, feeling the arousal already starting.

“Buck,” she said throatily, “I want you.”

He lifted his head and looked into her eyes. He wanted her too. Needed her. And it came as a total surprise to him.

“Let’s go up to the house.” The words were hard to force out, his throat constricting. He stood and held out his hand, helping her to her feet. Gathering her in his arms, he kissed her again, his hands moving down her back to her derrière, which he gave a slight squeeze. Then he took her hand and led her to the station house.

The man watched from a distance. He had watched the Kiowa carefully over the last six months, plotting his revenge. He knew when the Kiowa had moved back onto the station property, knew his routine, knew that he visited the house just a mile away daily. But today his anger peaked. He saw the long blond hair, knew the way the woman walked. Eagle Feather. With that half breed Kiowa. He would have her again. She belonged to him.

He moved away from his perch, planning.

Buck opened the door to Emma’s house. The place was kept spotless. Buck never knew when Emma and Sam might show up. Lou helped him clean it. The place was always dusted and swept, with fresh linens on the bed.

He closed the door and kissed her once more. His hands went up to her blouse, taking care of the few remaining buttons. His mouth went down her neck once more as she stood before him. When she gained control of herself, she pulled his shirt from his trousers, unbuttoned it and slid it from his shoulders. Her hands went around to his back, massaging the muscles, gripping his shoulders as she pressed herself against him. Her hand came back around and played with his nipple. Then it dropped back down to his crotch. She rubbed him through the fabric and he gave out a low growl of pleasure.

Gathering her into his arms, he carried her upstairs. When he put her down, it was in the bedroom, the feather bed looking very inviting. He kissed her again, his mouth claiming her lush lips, until she pushed him away a few inches. Reaching behind her, she unhooked her skirt and let it drop around her feet. Kneeling down, he helped her step out of it and untied her shoes, slipping them off her feet. She stood before him now wearing a camisole and pantaloons.

Buck held his breath as she stepped out of the last few items of clothing and stood before him naked. Her breasts, while not large, were firm, her figure slim and tight. His eyes moved down her, taking in the pinkish color of her nipples, the blond hairs between her legs.

“You’re beautiful.” he breathed out. Her hands reached forward. Buck stopped her, removing his boots and socks. Then he let her hands move forward, working the fasteners of his trousers. She slowly pulled them down, kneeling as she did, but not touching him. He stepped out of them and she tossed them aside. Then she stood and entered his arms once more.

She could feel his arousal pressing against her stomach, and a tingling sensation started running through her veins. He picked her up again and carried her over to the bed, lying her down gently and climbing up beside her. Her hand traced a line down his cheek and his mouth found hers. She gasped slightly when his fingers slid between her legs, quickly finding her opening, and sliding inside. His thumb rubbed her bud as his fingers massaged her. He worked slowly, his hand below, his mouth on her breast. Her hands finally moved, caressing his back and down to his buttocks, squeezing the firm muscles.

She felt uncontrollable shudders take over her body as Buck’s fingers continued to rub her. Her back arched and her breath came in gasps. When she was finally able to exhale, his mouth covered hers.

She let her hand drop between his legs, touching his flesh for the first time. Her fingers wrapped gently around him. She could feel an immediate reaction as he began to harden. She moved her hand up and down his length, moving the foreskin as she did. The head of his member was exposed, the muscle swelling as she touched it. Her hand darted across the muscle, cupping his scrotum and squeezing each of his balls gently, then running back up to the head. One finger danced over the end. Buck’s eyes were closed, his head laying back as she kissed his throat, his Adam’s apple, his collarbone. His hand moved back to her nether lips. She was still moist and ready for him.

“Buck…” He cut the words off with a kiss. Her hand led him to her, her legs spreading to take him between them. He shifted so he was on top of her, the head of his manhood gently pressing against her opening. He felt a slight bit of resistance as he began to push in. He stopped.

“Jen?” he said, his voice deep and husky with desire, but puzzled.

“Yes Buck, you’re my first.” She answered the unasked question. He started to pull away, but she held him in place.

“Are you certain?”

“I’ve never been so certain of anything in my life.” She reached down to touch him again, holding him as her hips moved forward, wanting him inside her, now. He moved gently forward, pressing carefully against her. She let out a quiet gasp as her hymen ruptured, then she spread her legs wider, her knees bending. He moved onward, sliding deep inside her, his hand supporting her back. She moaned again as tremors overtook her once more.

He made slow tender love to her, wanting this to be for her. He was amazed at what she had just given him. He had assumed that she had already been with someone, with the Lakota warrior she had been promised to. His hips moved gently, their hands moving over each other, touching, rubbing, pinching, and caressing. His hand went back between their legs, rubbing her as his hips moved against her. Her breathing became shallow and he knew she was near. And so was he. He tried to hold out for her once more, pulling out, sliding back in. But she was tight and he didn’t have much longer. Her back arched again, her internal muscles clamping around him, a moan escaping her lips.

He almost didn’t pull out in time. She held him inside, not knowing she did it. The head of his manhood was barely out of her before he erupted. Her hand touched his muscle as he released time and again.

His mouth sought hers as he rolled over to his side. Her leg followed him and lay over his thigh, her fingers stroked his chest. They both fell asleep, a tangle of arms, legs, and sheets.

He awoke an hour later, feeling her eyes on him.

“I was hoping you’d wake up soon.” She said, a twinkle in her eye.

“And just why would that be?”

“This is why!” she exclaimed as she reached below and grabbed him. The rest of her followed and he felt her mouth take him inside her.

“Jen! I thought…”

“Just because you were my first doesn’t mean I don’t know a thing or two. I grew up in a Lakota camp you know.” She answered looking up briefly, then returning to work on him.

Buck knew what she meant. Families shared a one-room lodge. He remembered waking more than once to the soft sounds of Red Bear and his wife making love.

He was suddenly glad that she had seen and learned. Her hand moved up and down his shaft as her mouth sucked on the head and her tongue traced a pattern down the vein to his scrotum. When her mouth took one of his balls in he thought he would scream. His cock hardened almost immediately.

“Whoa!” she exclaimed, surprised at the reaction.

“Come here!” he took hold of her hand and pulled her onto his lap, facing forward. One hand came around between her legs, playing with her curls before finding her nub again. The other went to her breast. His mouth found her neck. She turned her head to kiss him. She could feel his manhood, erect, and rubbing against her thighs. Reaching down she guided it toward her opening where his hand had already made her moist. She was ready and didn’t want to wait.

This time was definitely going to be different! He watched as Jen directed him in, her muscles expanding to accept him. He could feel her legs quiver slightly as he went deeper and deeper inside her. Then she began to move on top of him. His hands cupped her breasts and he kissed her shoulders as she began to move faster, coming quickly. He pulled out of her and she lay back next to him, her hand touching him. One eyebrow cocked upward in question.

“Yes?” he asked her innocently.

“What are we going to do about this?”

“I was hoping you’d have an idea.”

“Hmm. Why I think I do.” She started to climb out of the bed.

“Just where are you going?”

“I thought I’d take a walk. Get a little exercise.”

“I’ll give you a little exercise!” Buck scrambled out of the bed after her. They chased each other around the room, Jen using the bed to separate them. When he jumped up on the bed and off the other side he caught her, her laughter slowing her down. His arms wrapped around her waist as they laughed, his erection lay between her thighs. When Jen grabbed the brass frame at the foot of the bed Buck slid inside her. She tossed her hair over her shoulder and looked back at him, pleasure on her face. She braced herself as he started to move, his hips pumping into her, her hips joining in the rhythm. His hands went to her upper thighs, holding her. She was already moaning in pleasure, her back arching. Her arms and legs threatened to give out as her whole body shuddered.

He held her, easing her down to the floor. He took hold of her legs as he kneeled between them, opening her to him, and placed her feet against his chest, using a pillow from the bed to prop her hips up slightly. Then he entered her, his member hot and swollen, needy. She groaned with pleasure immediately. He needed to move in her, wanted to move in her, and he began a steady pumping movement, his hips grinding into hers as he moved himself around in her, just to pump again. She pulled his head down to hers, thrusting her tongue into his mouth, then released him so he could continue.

She began to make a steady sound, not a pant, not a gasp before she cried out. He pulled out, his manhood swollen and ready to burst. She immediately grabbed hold of it, wanting to help him finish. He leaned back against the bed frame as she took him into her mouth once more. She slid him in and out, sucking on the tip when she got there, then slid him back inside. He knew he was going to come and tried to stop her, but she grabbed hold of his buttocks and continued until he emptied himself. Then she released him and crawled up to straddle his lap, leaning against his chest, holding his now limp member in her hand.

They made love all afternoon. When they were both totally exhausted, they slept. Buck awoke first, slipped on his trousers and went outside. The sun was just going down. He went over to the bunkhouse and retrieved the leftover stew and some dried herbs and plants.

Then he heated some bath water. He was concerned that he had been too rough and that Jen would be sore from the afternoon’s activities, and he thought a warm bath with rosehips and mint might help. He had plenty of water waiting for her when she came down the stairs, still naked. Buck met her at the bottom of the steps.

“I thought a warm bath might feel good.” He said, still breathless at the sight of her.

“Only if you join me.”

“Maybe in a few minutes.” He moved forward and picked her up, cradling her in his arms. Then he carried her over and placed her in the tub. She sank down in the fragrant water.

“Mmmm. This is nice.” she murmured. He picked up a sponge and began to run it over her shoulders and down her legs. Then he stood and unfastened his trousers. Jen moved forward and he slipped in behind her. She contentedly lay back against his chest, his arms wrapping protectively around her. They soaked there until the water temperature cooled, no need for talk.

When she stepped out of the tub, Buck wrapped her in a warm towel and dried her off. She did the same for him. They ate some of the leftover stew. Jen headed back upstairs. Buck cleaned up the tub area and turned down the lamps. Then he followed her up.

Jen had put fresh linens on the bed and she lay there, wrapped in the towel. As he entered the room she opened the towel for his view. Her pale skin still held a pinkish glow from the warm bath, her nipples were erect from the change in temperatures.

He dropped his towel and moved toward her. His mouth was hungry and he took possession of hers. His hands began to move, gently moving over her body. His mouth soon followed, stopping at her breasts and spending several enjoyable moments there. But then he was on the move again, his tongue entering her navel. As he moved down still further, he grabbed hold of her and moved her closer to the edge of the bed. Kneeling down, he placed her legs over his shoulders, kissing her behind the knees as he did. His lips then moved over her thighs before finding the spot that would please her most.

His thumb and finger separated her lower lips, one finger finding her nub. His mouth joined it there. He kissed and licked, occasionally biting gently as he rubbed her with his finger. Her legs began to quiver and she couldn’t stop herself from trying to move her legs closer together. Her fingers tangled in his hair as shudders overtook her body.

They both moved up onto the bed and he lay beside her, taking her into his arms. She lay her head against his chest, moving her leg between his. He shifted position and let her put his member inside her. They fell asleep.

It was well after midnight when a noise caused Buck to awaken. He lay there tangled in Jen’s arms, listening. The mustang was stomping nervously in the breaking corral.

Buck had been having trouble with a coyote and been awoken this way many nights. He slowly disentangled himself and, grabbing his trousers and boots, made his way quietly down the stairs and onto the porch. He stopped there and put on his pants and boots, then moved quietly toward the bunkhouse. He didn’t have a weapon up at the house. He decided to get the bow he had under his bunk so a gunshot wouldn’t wake Jen. He was anxious to get back to her warm body and soft touch.

He was passing the barn when he heard the noise. Before he could react something hard smacked into the side of his head and everything went black. His assailant gave him a hard kick in the ribcage and, when getting no reaction, left the young man for dead.

Black Wolf entered the house silently, locating Jen by the slight creaking of the bedsprings as she shifted in her sleep. He crept up the stairs and approached the bed, observing the woman he was once to marry. She lay there, barely covered in white sheets, sleeping peacefully, a satisfied smile on her face. His anger boiled inside him. He reached out his hand to cover her mouth, suppressing the scream that came instantly to her lips, grabbing her wrists to keep her from fighting back. Then he slugged her, knocking her unconscious. He gathered her up in the sheets, grabbed her clothes from the floor, and carried her out to his horse.

Heavy dew settled over the ground in the early morning hours. It was this wetness that aroused Buck. He fought to open his eyes. His head felt heavy and the pain was almost more than he could take. His hand came up to feel the side of his head and came away wet and sticky. He tried to push himself up, but his head swam and he couldn’t focus his eyesight. His right arm gave out and he fell to the ground, unconscious once more.

As the sky to the east began to lighten he awoke once more. He managed to push himself up onto his hands and knees, his vision still swimming. He forced himself to his feet and staggered toward the house, falling twice before reaching the porch. He tripped on the stairs, landing hard and rolled onto his side, clutching his broken ribs until the pain subsided. The he struggled to his feet once more and managed to enter the house.

“Jen!” he called out weakly, barely a croak. Gathering a lung full of air he called out louder. There was no answer. Half crawling, half climbing, he made his way up the stairs and into the bedroom. It was empty.

He lay there for several minutes, trying to gather his strength. His vision came and went. He knew he was badly hurt, but he also knew that Jen was missing. Somehow he found the strength and ability to make his way to the barn. There was no way he could even consider picking up the saddle, so he pulled himself carefully onto the horse’s bareback. Leaning against his mount’s neck he walked the animal out of the barn.

His intention was to go get Kid and Lou. He needed help. But as the horse walked into the yard Buck’s vision cleared a bit and he saw the set of tracks leading away from the house and toward the hills. Help forgotten, he followed the tracks.

“Get your hands off me! I’m leaving and you’re not going to stop me!”

“You are going nowhere Eagle Feather. You will stay with me.” Black Wolf grabbed hold of Jen to keep her from moving away.

“No I won’t. Some time you will have to sleep. And I will be gone. I’m going back to Running Buck.”

“So you can lay with that Kiowa mongrel again?”

“You have no choice. I am no longer yours. That ended the day you killed April and my mother!” Jen referred to an incident that occurred after she was first returned to the white world. Her mother had decided to return to the Lakota with Jen’s half brother Two Ponies. April and her husband offered to give her a ride close to the camp. Black Wolf had killed April and her husband and had taken Shining Eyes back to camp. Black Wolf had then shot Shining Eyes, her mother, as she moved in between Black Wolf and his intended victim, Eagle Feather.

“You are too late. The Kiowa half-breed is dead. I bashed his brains in. I only wish that I had taken the time to remove his hair. It would have made a good trophy.”

Jen felt a hard knot develop in her stomach. Buck, dead? It wasn’t possible.

“No…” It came out in a whisper. Then anger overtook her and she struck out at him, her hand connecting with his cheek in a stinging slap. He grabbed hold of her tighter and they began to struggle. He ended up throwing her onto the ground and managed to tie her hands once more. Even though she was bound tightly she still struggled and fought. Black Wolf straddled her and, grabbing her head between his hands leaned over and forced a kiss on her. When she bit his lip, he slapped her again. And continued to hit her, over and over.

“Morning Teaspoon! Where’s Buck?”

“Buck’s missing. Jennifer Tompkins is too. We’ve got a big problem.” The Marshall stood near the station house where he had been searching for sign of Buck.

“He was suppose to come over to the house for breakfast and help with the corral. When he didn’t show, Lou and I came to check on him. He was, um, well a little occupied yesterday.” Kid replied as he and Lou followed the older man toward the barn.

“Tompkins was raising a fuss this morning because Jen hadn’t returned last night from visiting out here. So I came out to get her for him. I just got here a little bit ago myself. And I found this.” He stopped near the barn. The pool of blood was obvious. So were the signs of the person lying here struggling to his feet and heading toward the house.

“There’s blood in the house and in the barn too. His horse is gone. It appears he followed some tracks that way.” Teaspoon pointed to the hills.

“And Buck’s hurt badly.” Lou stated the obvious, still looking at the amount of blood soaking into the ground.

“Yep.”

“Then lets go help him.”

Buck sat his horse in a stand of trees, using his ears as much as his eyes to find the trail again. It was around noon. He had been trying to track the horse that had taken Jen all morning, but his eyesight kept fading in and out. He knew he should have gone for help, realizing that he had no weapon other than his knife in it’s boot sheath, and he was in no condition to use even that. He had had to stop frequently, sometimes passing out and even falling from his horse. This did nothing to help his aching ribcage and the sharp pains in his head.

If he was able to judge things properly, he figured he was less than an hours ride from the station house, but it had taken him around six hours to get to this point, after taking so many stops and having to back track repeatedly.

But he knew he was very close now. He could hear voices, angry voices, just a short distance ahead. But he needed to be sure that Jen was there. As he moved closer the voices got louder and he could tell for sure one voice was a woman’s.

He carefully made his way to the edge of the camp. He saw a Lakota warrior. As his vision swam in and out he saw that the man sat atop a woman. When he saw the blond hair he knew he had found her. He kicked his horse onward, barely holding on, and galloped into the clearing.

Black Wolf found he enjoyed slapping Eagle Feather. In fact it excited him. He would teach her a lesson. Reaching down he ripped open the blouse he had allowed her to put on, exposing her pale breast to his view. His hand reached down to touch it, pinching her nipple roughly. When the dazed girl failed to react he took hold of her nipple and twisted it until she cried out in pain. She roused herself enough to spit in the man’s face, receiving a hard smack across the face for her trouble.

Fully aroused, he reached down and pulled on her skirt until the fabric was torn or bunched enough to give him access to her private area. She struggled between his legs, but this only excited him more. Holding her tied hands with his left hand, he used his right hand to push aside the fabric of his breechcloth, pulling out his engorged member. Using one of his legs to part hers he moved to enter her. He was going to enjoy this! He had waited a long time for it.

He was so intent on his actions that he didn’t hear the horse until it was almost on him. Buck threw himself off the horse and collided with Black Wolf, knocking the man off of Jen and onto the ground. But it also knocked the wind out of Buck and he felt the sharp pain of his injured ribs. Buck rolled on the ground and Black Wolf was quickly on top of him, grabbing him by the hair and slamming his head against the ground. Buck’s head swam and he fought back the waves of nausea that threatened to overtake him.

“Jen! Run!” Buck managed to get out. Going by instinct more than vision Buck reached up and grabbed one of Black Wolf’s arms, his weak right arm pushing against the man’s face. He knew he had no chance of fighting the Lakota off. All he hoped was to slow him up so Jen could get away. He knew he would die in the process. He was sure he was dying anyway. He had accepted that during his search.

He struggled anyway, the will to live not giving up. But his right arm suddenly gave out. He tried to use it to grab hold of the warrior, but it wasn’t doing what he expected it to do. He felt a sharp, burning pain in his upper chest, heard Jen’s scream and a gunshot. Then what little vision he had left went black.

Teaspoon, Kid and Lou hurried to the encampment as fast as they could. By the time they got there Jen was cradling Buck’s limp form in her lap as silent tears ran down her face. Black Wolf lay dead a few short feet away, the victim of one of Kid’s well placed bullets.

They stood on the porch of the station house, Teaspoon, Kid, Lou, and Tompkins. Jen had insisted on staying with Buck and the doctor had finally relented.

Teaspoon, Kid and Lou had wasted no time when they had come upon Buck and Jen in the encampment. Teaspoon and Kid tried to find the makings of a travois as Lou helped Jen. The two women used the sheet that Jen had originally been wrapped in and bound the knife wound on Buck’s chest. Black Wolf had tried to drive it into Buck’s heart, but Buck had grabbed at him and shifted the entry wound toward the left shoulder. Still, the wound was serious and bleeding heavily.

When Buck was finally transferred to the travois, Kid rode off toward Sweetwater for the doctor. Everyone feared that Buck would not make the trip into town, so they had decided on returning to the stationhouse.

They carried him upstairs to the bedroom, Teaspoon trying to settle him as Lou put water on to heat so they could sterilize bandages and have hot water to clean his wounds. Jen stayed by his side, talking to him, helping Teaspoon when she could. It seemed like forever before the doctor arrived, Tompkins in tow.

The small group spent the time pacing. Tompkins grumbled a lot about the riders being nothing but trouble, Buck especially, but was cut off by three sets of glaring eyes.

“I telegraphed Emma and Rachel.” Kid said distractedly, his eyes darting to the doorway.

“We don’t really have much to tell them yet Kid.” Teaspoon said softly.

“I know. I just said that Buck was seriously injured and we’d let them know anything further.” When Teaspoon looked at him quizzically Kid added, “They need to know Teaspoon. They’d be mad if they didn’t. Neither of them were able to be there when Ike… Anyway, I also tried to locate Jimmy and Cody.”

“You’re right, Kid.”

Everyone’s attention was suddenly at the door as the doctor walked out. The man shook his head as he wiped his hands on a towel.

“I’m not gonna lie to you. It doesn’t look good.” The man said. Kid immediately put his arm around Lou’s shoulders.

“Go on Doc.” Teaspoon prompted.

“The chest wound is bad enough, but he was fairly lucky there. If that were his only injury I’d say he’d have no problem recovering with a lot of rest.”

“But…?”

“But the head wound is bad. Whatever he was hit with should have killed him. I don’t know how he did what he did. He’s still breathing anyway.”

“What are you tap dancing around Doc?”

“He’s in a coma. I have no way of telling if he’ll awaken or not. Head wounds are…well, we just don’t know enough about them. We don’t know what’s going on in there well enough to know how to treat it. And I’ve got to repeat myself, the wound is very bad. I’ve never seen anyone survive a blow to the head that severe.”

“Can we see him?” Lou asked quietly. Kid’s arms tightened around her shoulders. They both knew they were facing the death of yet another member of their extended family.

“Go on up. I’ll be there in a moment to show you how to care for him.”

Kid and Lou entered the house. The doctor stopped Teaspoon and Tompkins lagged behind with him.

“Teaspoon, I need to be very blunt with you. He’s got two cracks on the head. The one on the back of his head isn’t life threatening. But the first one, well, I’m certain his skull is cracked. It is very rare for anyone to survive an injury like that. And if they do they’re rarely the same.”

Teaspoon studied the man’s face, then nodded, his voice catching in his throat.

“What about my daughter?” Tompkins demanded.

“I took a few minutes to examine her. She’s bruised and sore but she’ll be all right. There are marks on parts of her body,” the doctor paused, trying to find the right words, “But she says that the Indian didn’t harm her anymore than slapping her around.”

“But her clothes were torn. Was she raped?”

“She says she wasn’t.”

“And what do you say? You examined her didn’t you?”

“She says she wasn’t and I’m taking her at her word. She’s a strong girl and is perfectly alert. I have no reason not to believe her.”

“Okay. Well, let’s go up.” Teaspoon entered the house and climbed the stairs. Tompkins stayed on the porch, preferring to fret and stew over his own ideas of what might have happened. It was for the best. After all, the man was recovering from a bullet wound himself. And Jen didn’t need the added stress of dealing with her father just yet.

Teaspoon stopped in the doorway. If anything the boy lying in Emma’s bed looked worse than when they’d found him, despite the fact that the blood had been cleaned away. He was very pale, especially for him, and the bandages around his chest and head did nothing to help that. The doctor had shaved some of the hair from around the wound and the balance was pulled away from it and tied back. Jen wouldn’t let him shave off anymore than necessary.

Worse yet, he was barely breathing. Teaspoon had to study him very hard to see the rise and fall of his chest. And he was very still. Teaspoon couldn’t even see movement behind his eyelids, which you could see occasionally when someone was just sleeping.

Teaspoon squared his shoulders and continued into the room. He stopped at Jen’s side.

“You okay?” he asked softly. She nodded. Then he knelt at Buck’s side.

“I don’t know what’s happening in that head of yours right now Buck, but you’ve got a roomful of people praying that you get better real soon. Now I know you, and I know you wouldn’t want to disappoint us.” Then he stepped aside to let the doctor instruct them in Buck’s care.

Kid and Lou moved in to the bunkhouse. Kid took care of the horses at both homes and helped as much as he could with Buck, but Lou and Jen did most of the work the first two days. They both lovingly kept him washed and clean, fed him broth and talked to him. The doctor had told them to turn Buck on his side regularly. It would help prevent bedsores and, hopefully, pneumonia.

On the morning of the third day the doctor arrived with a passenger. Emma stepped down and silently entered her house. She removed her hat and lay it on the table, looked around, then went upstairs and into the bedroom. Jen was resting, lying on a cot near the bed. Lou sat on the edge of the bed, gently spooning broth into Buck’s mouth. She jumped slightly when she heard Emma’s voice.

“I remember doing that for Ike once. And now it’s Buck.”

“Emma!” Lou exclaimed in a low voice, not wanting to wake Jen. She rushed into the woman’s arms. “I’m so glad you came.” Then she added in a whisper, just in case Buck could hear, “It’s not good Emma. The doctor doesn’t think he’ll make it.”

“I know, Lullabelle. I rode out with Doc.” She gave the girl an extra squeeze then stepped toward the bed, pausing for a moment. “I couldn’t stand the thought of not being here. I wasn’t for Ike. I’ll always regret that.” Then she moved over to the bedside, kneeling by him. Her hand reached out and stroked his forehead. Kid came up the stairs, alerted by the doctor that Emma was here. He placed his arm around Lou’s waist and she turned burying her face in his chest, relief that there was help and worry for her friend overcoming her. She cried silent tears as her husband held her. They both listened as Emma talked to Buck.

“Buck? It’s Emma. I need you to wake up. Do ya hear me Buck? I want you to wake up so we can talk. I’ve got so many things to tell you and the others. In fact I’ve got news that only Sam knows. Wake up so I can tell ya.” When he didn’t respond, she just sat there, stroking his hair.

“Okay Buck, you rest a bit. We’ll talk in a little while.” She stood and walked over to greet Kid. The doctor entered the room and began to examine Buck. The three old friends stepped into the hall so the doctor could work.

The doctor exited the room a half an hour later shaking his head.

“No changes. He’s no better. But he’s no worse either. I’ll be back in the morning.” Kid walked him outside as the two women went back to his bedside. Emma sat on the edge of the bed and hummed a lullaby.

The family fell into a routine. While they all knew that caring for Buck could consume all their time, by choice, as the days went by they realized that they had to start living some sort of life again. Emma reluctantly went into town for church services and for supplies once a week. Lou resumed helping Kid with their own homestead as well as caring for the stock located at Emma’s. They convinced Jen to finally leave Buck’s side and get some real rest and once rested and somewhat recovered herself she would spend time in the garden Buck had planted after his return to the station.

Jen had had a huge fight with her father the day Buck was injured and she was kidnapped. Tompkins of course wanted her to return to town with him. She had refused, wanting to help care for Buck. Tompkins had stormed off with the doctor, returning three days later, the day Emma arrived, to try again. When she still refused, he left, vowing that she would have to come to him if she wanted him for a father.

No one knew that his gruff attitude was out of concern for Jen and not dislike for Buck. He really did like the boy, but whenever Buck and Jen got together, heartache for Jen, and himself, always followed. The first time the two had met Tompkins wife had been killed. Then Jen left him to go back east.

When Jen had come back to try a second time as a family, Buck had shown up in her life again. And it looked like she had been hurt again. And could be even more so. He could tell by his daughter’s actions that she was having some feelings for the half-breed. This in itself would not be a life Tompkins wanted for his daughter. Besides, the boy probably wouldn’t even live past the next few days.

Several weeks went by and there still was no change in Buck’s condition. Teaspoon and Kid made a backboard so they could sit him upright. The doctor felt that it might help keep fluids from building in his lungs.

Someone was with him at all times, talking to him, touching him. The doctor showed them how to massage muscles and they moved his joints, hoping the stimulation might awaken him. But he showed no signs of change. The doctor could only shake his head and wonder how the young man was still alive. The visible wounds were healing well. It was the one the doctor couldn’t see that was still the problem.

A week after the incident Jimmy showed up on their doorstep. The reunion was bittersweet. But everyone fell into routine, as if no time had passed since they had last been together.

Jen was kneeling by Buck’s bedside six weeks after his injury. They were all trying not to give up hope, but as each day, then week, went by they each began to have doubts. But no one spoke them out loud. Teaspoon had just come back from town and been in to talk to Buck. Then he went out to see if he could help Kid and Jimmy in the barn. Watching this boy that he thought of as his son was breaking his heart. It was obvious to all of them that he was growing weaker. Dark circles appeared under his eyes, his ribs showed as he lost weight, broth not being enough to sustain him for such a length of time. At least the bandages had been removed.

“Kid and Jimmy are down in the barn right now.” She told him. “The painted mare just foaled. Kid says it should bring a good price.” She studied his face, saw no reaction. They all were feeling frustrated, trying to find something that would bring him back to them.

Out of habit, she reached up and placed her hand on his chest as she talked, her fingers moving slightly, tracing his ribs or gently rubbing his nipple. It hardened slightly as it usually did. She was always amazed at the response of the body when there seemed to be no response from the brain. When they were alone together she would kiss him. The lack of response often left her feeling empty, but she did it to feel close to him, let him know she was there.

She kissed him now, feeling his warm breath on her lips. She moved her tongue against his lips, parting them, and slipped her tongue inside his mouth. Desire closed in on her and she kissed him harder. Suddenly she jerked away, her eyes studying the still man in front of her. Then she kissed him again. She hadn’t imagined it. She jumped to her feet and ran to the window. Throwing it open, she started yelling. When she saw the first person emerge from the barn she returned to Buck’s side, kissing him again to reassure herself. Then she watched his face some more.

She heard the pounding of feet coming up the stairs. Teaspoon and Emma entered first, closely followed by the others, worry on all their faces.

“Jen? What’s happened?” Teaspoon asked, almost afraid to approach the two on the bed. Tears were falling down the young woman’s face and they all feared the worst had finally happened.

“He responded to me. I know he did. His eyes are even moving. You can see it behind his lids.”

Emma moved closer, studying the boy’s face. Her hand reached out and touched his cheek. She did see slight eye movement in response to her touch. She looked up and nodded her head.

“I’ll go get Doc.” Jimmy said, casting one last glance at his friend before running down the stairs and out to the barn.

“Jennifer, what exactly happened?” Teaspoon asked as they all crowded around the bed, needing to see for themselves.

“I…well I kissed him. And I know that his tongue moved against mine. I even think that his lips might have moved.” She seemed a little embarrassed admitting to the passion of the kiss. It hadn’t been a peck on the cheek, but a kiss that was reserved for lovers. But then she realized that they all had that figured out anyway.

“Buck?” Teaspoon said a little louder. “Time to wake up son. Come on boy.” There was slight movement of his eyes. Emma jumped when she felt a tiny bit of movement of one finger of his left hand. She had been clutching the hand. She picked it up, running a nail against his fingertip. It moved just a bit.

Kid held Lou close, hugging her from behind. She stood with her hands clutched in front of her mouth, her eyes not leaving her friend. Emma did the same thing with Buck’s right hand and got no response. Jen had moved to Buck’s right side and was sitting up on the bed, her hand touching his shoulder.

“Buck?” Emma tried next. Inspiration caught her and her next words were “Rider up Buck!” Everyone smiled at the phrase, knowing that for eighteen short months they had all jumped automatically into action when the words were called. Buck’s eyelids fluttered and the room erupted in noise. Emma clutched his hand to her cheek as the index finger moved ever so slightly.

Even Teaspoon had a hard time holding back the tears.

They all waited impatiently in the sitting room while the doctor did his examination. Only Emma had been allowed to remain upstairs to assist the doctor.

He finally came down after more than an hour, shaking his head in disbelief.

“Well?” Jimmy demanded when the doctor didn’t say anything at first.

“I don’t believe it. I just don’t believe it.” The doctor said, almost to himself.

“Doc, please!” Teaspoon responded.

“He’s resting. Really resting. His breathing is more regular than it’s been and I really think that he has entered actual sleep.”

“What do you mean sleep? Ain’t that what he’s been doing all along?” Jimmy asked.

“Not really. Coma is not sleep or rest. We do know that much.” The doctor began rummaging through his bag, checking to see if he had all his equipment before he left. When he snapped it closed again he continued. “I don’t know how or why, but I think he now has a chance of making it. Let him sleep, keep feeding him broth and tea, and come get me when he wakes up. I’ll be back tomorrow unless you come get me sooner.”

With that the man walked out the door. Teaspoon followed him out, asking the doctor what they should expect. Jen headed to the stairs and the others followed quietly, not wanting to wake their sleeping friend.

None of them were sure if they imagined it or not, but they each thought they saw a change in the sleeping man.

Jen lay on the bed next to Buck, curled on her side, one hand lying on his chest, her eyes watching it rise and fall. Emma sat in her rocker next to the bed, some mending in her hands, but her head had dropped to her chest. They were all exhausted. They had spent the whole night awake, watching the young man sleep, each wanting to know the moment he should awaken. Teaspoon had told them what he had heard from the doctor, that when Buck awoke, and the word had been when and not if, they could not expect for him not to have changed in some way. There might be little changes or signs of his injury. Or the changes could be radical and the young man may not even react to them, spending the rest of his life unable to function in even the smallest manner.

As morning had broken and there was still no sign of him wakening, they all drifted off. Teaspoon was asleep leaning against the doorframe, Kid had Lou curled in his arms on the floor against the bed, and Jimmy was on the floor near the window.

Jen’s hand ran over Buck’s chest. Every so often she would look up at his face to see if there were any changes. But her eyes were getting heavy and she was having a hard time staying awake. She caught the motion through partially closed eyes and it took several moments before it registered in her brain. She sat up and stared as Emma stirred. They both watched as Buck’s fingers curled into his palm. Their gaze moved up to his face where they saw his eyes fluttering open.

“Buck?” Jen said softly as Emma moved out of the chair and to his side. Their movements were enough to wake the others and they all looked toward the bed, staggering to their feet, Kid and Lou wiping sleep from their eyes, Jimmy and Teaspoon instantly wide awake.

“Mmmm.” Came a soft sound from the young man. His hand tried to lift from the bed, but he was very weak and it only rose an inch or so before falling back to the bed. His eyes opened slowly.

“Wake up son. Come on.” Teaspoon encouraged.

“Where?” The word was barely audible. It was obviously a struggle to even try to utter a single word.

“You’re back at the station house son. Everyone’s here. Even Emma.”

“Umma?” The word was slurred slightly, but he wasn’t fully awake yet. They tried not to read anything into his condition just yet.

“Right here Buck. I’m right here.”

“Wa…ter.” Emma poured a glass and held it to his lips. He managed to take two swallows before stopping. But it did seem to refresh him a little because his eyes were now fully open and moving towards any sound.

“Turn…lamp. Dark. Can’t…” The effort took what little strength Buck had and his eyes fluttered closed once more.

The family looked at each other. The room was bathed in bright sunlight.

The group was stunned. Even though they had been warned that Buck might have problems, they had all been hopeful.

“Well, it doesn’t really mean nothin’.” Teaspoon said, fighting back a surge of emotion. “He was barely awake. Things might be different next time.”

“That’s true.” Emma added. “You know what we need? Some breakfast. Lou why don’t you come help me.” The two women reluctantly left the room, choosing activity to distract them. Kid and Jimmy headed to the barn to feed the animals. Teaspoon stood for a few minutes watching Jen.

“It’s still early Jen. Don’t worry. That boy doesn’t give up. He’s a fighter.”

“But he’s so weak Teaspoon.”

“I know girl, I know.”

She was lying next to him once more when he awoke the second time. He could feel her hand rubbing gently against his chest, playing with his nipple. He struggled to open his eyes, but even when he thought they were open he could see no difference.

“Jen?” his voice sounded distant to him.

“Buck? You’re really awake!”

“Mmm. Water?” he asked.

“Of course.” He felt the bed move and heard her footsteps. Moments later he felt a glass pressed against his lips. He was so thirsty. She pulled it away before his thirst was quenched. “You need to go easy. Not too much at once.”

“Mmm.” He tried to lift his hand again but settled for wiggling the fingers. His right arm felt strange, kind of tingly, and he couldn’t tell if his fingers moved there or not.

“I’m glad you’re finally awake.” She said. Jen leaned down and kissed him and he responded. He could hear the sound of footsteps on the stairs and the door opening. Jen pulled away.

“I thought I heard sound up here! Welcome back Buck.”

“Emma? What are you doing back?” It was still an effort to talk. He was so tired. But he didn’t want to sleep. He wanted information. He heard a window open and Emma yelled something. Then he heard her return to his side. Jen had returned to the bed next to him. He felt Emma’s hand on his forehead, pushing stray hairs out of the way.

“I came back to help care for you. You gave everyone quit a scare.”

“Sorry.”

“Nothing to be sorry about. The others will be up here soon. They were out in the barn.”

“Mmm.”

“Tired?”

“Yeah.”

“Can you try to stay awake just a little while longer? The others really want to talk to you.” Emma studied his face. His eyes appeared unfocused.

“Yeah. Sure.” But he wasn’t sure he would be able to. His head hurt. He could remember bits about what had happened, not liking what he remembered. He also didn’t like the results. Then again, he had accepted death. He would learn to live with darkness. Because that was what he saw.

He heard running footsteps and several people enter the room. The noise only made his head thump harder. He did see something. Small bright spots of light swam around in the darkness.

“Hey Buck.”

“Kid.”

“How ya feeling son?”

“Head hurts. Jen? You all right?”

“I’m fine Buck. You were there for me again.”

“Mmm.” He acknowledged her comment, but didn’t understand it right at the moment. He was sure it would make sense later. When his head stopped hurting.

“You’d best hurry out of that bed Buck Cross, cuz I’m tired of doing your work for you.”

“Jimmy? How’d you get here so fast?”

Teaspoon looked at the others, then sat on the edge of his bed.

“Son, you’ve been in a coma for over six weeks. You’ve been hurt pretty bad.”

“Six weeks?” His head kept thumping. He closed his eyes and let the news sink in. Six weeks. That was a long time.

“I’ll go fetch the doctor.” He heard Jimmy say.

“Good idea. We should let him sleep some more.” Teaspoon said. The others said good byes. He felt hands touch his shoulder and Lou place a kiss on his cheek.

“We love you Buck.” She said.

“Me too Lou.” He heard their steps recede.

“Can you stay awake to eat a little broth?” Emma asked.

“I’ll try.”

“Then I’ll be right back.”

“Teaspoon?” he said as he felt the man rise from the bed. The man sat back down.

“I can’t see Teaspoon.”

“Nothing?”

Buck started to shake his head but thought twice about it. “It’s all black.”

“Doesn’t mean yet that it’s permanent. You still got some healing to do. Let’s not start worrying yet.”

“You said it’s been six weeks.”

“I know son. The doc will be here a little later. We’ll see what he has to say.” His hand rested on Buck’s left arm. He gave it a squeeze. “Don’t worry.”

Teaspoon rose and left the room.

“Jen, you still here?”

“Right by you side.”

“I can’t seem to lift my arm. So tired…” He paused for a moment gathering strength. “Would you, umm, would you put your arms around me? I want to feel you close to me.”

She lifted his right arm and placed it around her shoulder. It slipped to the bed behind her as she wrapped her arm around his chest. She studied his face, his eyes unfocused, then she leaned in for a kiss. He returned it, needily.

The doctor spent well over an hour checking Buck over. He had allowed both Lou and Emma to stay, but Jen was clearly worn out and he had insisted that she lay down before he even began his examination of Buck. It didn’t really take much to convince her to curl up on the cot in Emma’s spare room.

The doctor spent extra time checking Buck’s eyes and poking his fingers and feet with probes, looking for signs that he registered feeling there. Buck was drifting off to sleep before the doctor even finished. The doctor pulled the two women out onto the landing to talk.

“There seems to be a slight loss of sensation on his right side. Some of that may just be because he’s very weak. Once he gains back his strength it may not even be noticeable.”

“His right side? But the injury was on the left.” Emma asked.

“It’s one of those things we don’t understand, but injuries on the right side effect the left side of the body and vice versa.”

“What about his eyesight? That will improve with time too, won’t it?”

“I’ve got to be honest with you. It’s doubtful. There might be some change as he continues to heal, but after all this time I have strong doubts you’ll notice much change at all.”

“So you’re saying he’ll probably be blind for the rest of his life?” Lou asked, realization sinking in.

“It looks that way. Let’s get him started on something other than broth. Thin oatmeal or mush, maybe some mashed potatoes. Soft food. Then add something for flavor, to keep his interest. He won’t feel like eating, since he’s had no real food in awhile. And he shouldn’t eat a lot at one sitting. Small amounts and often.” The doctor picked up his bag.

“I’ll go make him something. He’s not sleeping hard. We’ll get him to eat when he awakens.” Emma walked out with the doctor to inform the others waiting below. Lou moved over to the bed taking a seat in the rocker next to it.

“Lou?” His voice came out as a tired whisper.

“Now how did you know it was me?” she asked as she stood and moved to the bedside. His eyes were partially open. She kneeled there and reached out, resting her hand on his arm.

“I could tell by the sound of your walk.”

“Now Buck, you’ve only been awake a short time. How could you know my walk by now?” Her voice was soft and as lighthearted as she could make it.

“I’ve always known it. I slept in the same room as you for almost two years. I knew who was moving around at night just by the sound.” He paused, as if to gather his thoughts, or his strength. “Knew when you snuck into Kid’s bunk at night too.”

“Why Buck Cross! Why didn’t you let us know?”

“None of my business.” His brows knit together, an indication of the pain he was in.

“Hurting bad?”

“Yeah.”

“What if I rub your temples? That helps me.”

“All right.”

Lou reached behind him and helped him sit up, holding his head while she slipped behind him, letting him rest back against her chest, his head on her shoulder. She began to gently rub his temples, her chin leaning against the top of his head gently.

“Better?” she whispered.

“Some. Thank you.” His eyes had closed and his head lay heavy against her shoulder.

“What did the doctor say?” he asked just as she decided he must have fallen asleep.

“That you’re gonna be just fine with a little more rest and some of Emma’s good cooking. She’s fixing you something right now.”

“The truth Lou. I could always count on you for the truth.”

She hated being the one to tell him. Teaspoon was much better at these things. But she was stuck. She couldn’t lie to him.

“You’ve lost some feeling on your right side, but he doesn’t think it will be a problem after you recover some. The stab wound has heeled just fine.”

“Stab wound?”

“Black Wolf tried to kill you with a knife. He got you in the left shoulder.”

“It was Black Wolf that took Jen?”

“You didn’t know that?”

“Didn’t see him. Hit me from behind.”

“He’s dead now. Kid shot him before he could use the knife on you again.” Lou thought maybe she’d get lucky and not have to finish the doctor’s prognosis. But he wasn’t going to let that happen.

“Lou, what about…?”

“He doesn’t think your eyesight will improve much. But he’s not positive. They don’t know much about head wounds. And he doesn’t know you.”

He was quiet for a long while but she knew he wasn’t asleep. His breathing was a little too fast.

“Thank you.” He finally said and they lapsed into silence once more.

“Lou?”

“Hmm?”

“I’m afraid.”

“I know.” Her arms moved to embrace him around the shoulders in a protective hug. “It’s gonna be all right. I promise.”

Emma found them both sound asleep like that a few minutes later.

Over the next several days Buck became more and more alert. The headaches stayed with him, sometimes so bad that he wanted to scream. But he didn’t. The women still cared for his every need, feeding him, bathing him. He gained strength very slowly. It was three days before he even was able to lift his arm from the bed. He had very little muscular control. Holding his head up took more effort than it was worth because the pain increased when he tried to do so.

The doctor had showed them exercises and massages to help him regain movement. Four times everyday any two of them descended upon him to bend his legs and elbows and massage underused muscle. It was painful. In between they might sit and rub the cramps away.

When they would finally let him rest it was only after shifting his position, laying him on his side and stomach. Emma would sit for hours and rub his back, trying to relax him so he might sleep. But the thumping in his head was beginning to interrupt even that. He almost wished for the days when all he did was sleep.

Even Buck could tell that Emma was wearing down. They all were, but Emma seemed to look more tired, even after she had rested. When Sam came to visit, which he had tried to do every other week, at least for a few days, they finally divulged why. They told Buck first, hoping the news would bolster his spirits.

Emma was upstairs when Sam arrived. Lou and the men were in the barn and Jen was sleeping. She had taken on Buck’s night care, finding that she enjoyed the time alone with him, even if he did sleep most of the time. They still had some wakeful moments together. And Teaspoon always slept on a cot against the far wall in case she needed assistance.

Emma rarely left his side during the day, unless it was to fix him a small meal, which she usually had to force him to eat. He wasn’t being difficult, he just lacked an appetite. Lou took over during the evenings so that Emma could take a break.

Sam climbed the stairs and entered the room slowly. The others had told him that Buck was finally out of the coma, but he was quiet in case the boy was sleeping. He stood in the door watching his wife washing the young man’s neck, chest and arms. Buck lay on the bed quietly, his eyes closed, not asleep but humiliated by the circumstances. Sam cleared his throat when Emma started to turn down the sheet to wash Buck’s legs and more private areas.

“Sam!” Emma tugged at the sheet to make sure Buck was covered and stood to greet her husband. Buck’s eyes crept open and followed the sound out of habit.

“Hello Darlin’.” Sam took her into his arms and gave her a kiss. His hand dropped to her stomach, which was just beginning to show a hint of roundness. “How is everyone?”

“Why everyone is doin’ just fine. Look, he’s awake.” They held hands as they walked toward the bed.

“So I heard. How ya feeling Buck? You really gave everyone a scare.”

“Could be feeling worse, I guess. Sorry to take your wife away. But it’s been nice having her here.”

“It’s alright Buck. I wish it was under different circumstances, but I’m glad we were so close by. She’d probably have been sitting all by herself in Fort Kearney anyway, so it worked out just fine for her to stay here. I’d rather she were here anyway.”

Sam looked at her, eyebrows lifted in question and pointing to her stomach. Emma nodded and sat on the edge of the bed.

“Buck, some people say that when a person is in a coma they can hear what’s being said around them. That’s why Doc told us to talk to you. When I first got here I told you I had news that I would share with you when you awoke. Well, you’ll be the second to know. We’re gonna have a baby.”

As the news sank in to his pain addled brain a smile broke across his face, the first they’d seen from him in months.

“That’s great! Congratulations! Sam, I’d shake your hand if I could.”

“Well, I’ll help ya out there.” He reached down and took Buck’s hand, shaking it. Buck could feel a slight pressure from the grasp. This was good. Feeling was increasing.

“We’ve also decided to move back to Sweetwater.” Emma added.

“Yeah, with the baby coming I don’t want Emma following me around as much. The travel would be too much. I’ve gotten permission to work out of Sweetwater and they’ve changed my territory a little to accommodate it.”

“It’ll be good to have you two back here. More like old times. So you’ll be sharing an office with Teaspoon?”

“I suppose I’ll need a desk there, but I won’t be there much. I’ll still be traveling a lot. That’s why I wanted Emma and the baby back here. They’ll have the lot of you around when I’m gone to keep her on her toes.”

“Yeah well, we do the best we can…”

“He needs to rest Sam. Why don’t you go down stairs and get something to eat. I’ll be down when Lou comes in to take over.”

“Emma, go spend some time with your husband. I’ll be fine.” His voice was already drifting off.

“I don’t know Buck…”

“Go. I’ll yell if I need anything.”

“Well, all right. I’ll just be a few minutes.”

Buck closed his eyes, knowing that Emma would watch him until she thought he was asleep. When she left the room his eyes opened again. He wouldn’t be able to sleep just yet. His head was throbbing right now and sleep was out of the question.

“This was the first experience I’ve had dealing with a head wound of this degree and someone surviving it. So I sent a telegram back east to a few Universities and hospitals for some advice. I’ve received several replies saying that they feel surgery could help with the shooting pains you’re feeling.”

“Surgery? How could that help?” Teaspoon asked. The doctor had gathered Emma and Teaspoon when he went to discuss this with Buck.

“They seem to think that a bone chip might have lodged in his brain, or that a fragment is pressing against the brain itself. That could cause those sharp pains. The chip could be removed surgically.”

“And the pain would stop?” Buck asked. His head was leaning against the headboard. It was too painful to move it much.

“That’s what they think. I gotta tell you though, there’s no guarantee. It might not change things at all. It might not even be the cause. And there might not even be a fragment or chip there, but it feels like it to me. The area where you were hit feels very rough, very irregular.”

“But there are possible complications. Surgery on the brain is a very new science. You could go back into a coma. You could awaken in worse condition than you are now. Or you might not even survive.”

“Then he shouldn’t have the surgery. Not if he could die. He’ll get better eventually without it won’t he?” Emma jumped in, concern and fear in her voice.

“No. I want to get better. I want to continue living. But I can’t this way. The pain is too great. There have been nights when I’ve prayed to the Gods that they take my life. Do the surgery.”

Teaspoon studied the young man. Until that moment, none of them had realized just how much pain the boy had been in the past two weeks, ever since he had awoke.

“When can you do it Doc?” Teaspoon asked, the decision made as far as he was concerned. Emma looked at him, then nodded, resigned to the decision.

“I can’t. Or rather I won’t. I’ve never tried anything like this before and I don’t want to run the risk. But there is a doctor in Denver that is willing to come out and do it. He can be here in two days. All I have to do is wire him.”

“Do it.” Teaspoon said.

The surgery was done three days later. Neither doctor wanted to put Buck through the discomfort of a ride into town, so they operated in Emma’s house, on the dining table. Old Doc Barnes assisted Doctor Neal with the delicate work with Sam controlling the anesthetic. Emma wanted to be there, but Sam had put his foot down. She was tired enough and Sam wanted to help where he could. They also ruled Teaspoon out as being too close to the situation. Neither doctor wanted the man in with them if something went wrong.

So the family members were once again banished out of the house to wait, hour by agonizing hour. The operation had started in the morning and didn’t end until afternoon. They had found a small piece of bone that had wedged itself into the soft tissue. Doctor Neal also maneuvered a large piece of Buck’s skull back into alignment with the rest.

There was a great deal of bleeding, as with all head wounds, and Buck lost a lot. Sam watched the whole thing, fascinated. He had seen a lot of wounds over the years and not much bothered him anymore. The three men worked quietly, finally ending the procedure by immobilizing Buck’s head, tying it to a board slipped under his head and shoulders. The wound needed to heal, the bone to knit, before Buck would be allowed to move around. He would be allowed to sit up with the use of a backboard and move his limbs but his head must not shift. It was like splinting a broken arm or leg.

Buck would be living with a small hole in his skull about the size of a pea.

He slept for four days. Both doctors reassured them that it was indeed sleep and not coma.

When he awoke, he still had headaches, but he told everyone over and over that they weren’t as bad as before.

His progress was much quicker now, his determination greater.

His strength began to return and it wasn’t long before he had movement of all his limbs, although his right side was still sluggish, but even that was improving. Feeding himself was also a chore, his hand shaking too much yet to get more than a bite or two of food before spilling it all over himself. And because he was still confined to bed he was still at the mercy of others for his basic needs.

He thought he should be getting used to that by now, but it was still humiliating to him.

Now that pain didn’t totally consume him, time seemed to stand still. Jen had moved back to sleeping during the night on a cot in Buck’s room, so the women took turns staying with him during the day, trying to keep him distracted. They would read books and go over the operations of the ranch.

The men came in to sit with him often. Jimmy especially seemed to be able to push all the right buttons to make Buck try harder at the exercises they still helped him with. But then Jimmy had always been good at that.

Cody stopped by when his Army unit was in the area, full of guilt for not being able to visit sooner. He was only able to stay a few days.

And they finally heard from Rachel, who had taken an unexpected trip back East to visit a cousin. The telegram Kid sent had taken two months to catch up to her, as she had spent much of the time touring the eastern coast. Kid sent off another message updating her on Buck’s condition and reassured her that he was well on the way to recovery.

One morning, two weeks after surgery, Jimmy had the duty of staying inside. The women had all gone into town for a much deserved break, spending the morning shopping and visiting friends. Emma swore they would be back by lunch. Among other reasons she was beginning to tire more easily and she had begun taking a nap in the afternoon, forcing Buck to do so also, even though he swore he no longer needed or wanted to sleep that much.

Jimmy didn’t mind at all, finding the duty far less strenuous than mucking out the barn stalls. He had already harassed Buck as much as he dared, finding that his friend’s strength was indeed increasing. When Buck had been pushing his fist against Jimmy’s palm he had actually pushed Jimmy backward.

So he decided it was best not to give Buck a hard time. They sat in silence for awhile, until Buck broke it.

“Jimmy? I want to try and walk. I need out of this bed. Will you help me?”

“I don’t think so, Buck. You may have just knocked me backward, but I don’t think that’s such a good idea.”

“You owe me Jimmy. Remember the time that…”

“Don’t even go there, Buck. If I help you up and Emma finds out she’ll skin me alive and probably you too just for good measure.”

“She won’t find out. How would she. Okay, okay, I know we’re talking about Emma. She knows everything.”

“That she does.”

“But you’re gonna help me anyway.”

Jimmy shook his head as he moved closer to the bed.

“Of course I am.”

Jimmy helped Buck sit forward and swing to the edge of the bed. Then he sat next to Buck and placed his friends left arm over his shoulder and his own arm around Buck’s back. Slowly the two stood. Buck’s legs threatened to buckle under him, but Jimmy held him upright. Tentatively, Buck took a step forward.

“What are you two doing?” Emma exclaimed from the doorway. Then she rushed forward to take Buck’s other arm.

“Walking.” He replied.

“Is that what you call this?”

“I guess I’d call it more trying to walk.”

“Yeah, that would be more like it. And you Jimmy should know better.”

“Buck’s a grown man. Seems he should be able to make a few decisions for himself.”

“And you shouldn’t have encouraged him.”

“Didn’t encourage him. Just kept him from falling on his face.”

“Well at least you did that.”

The whole time Emma was scolding the two young men she was supporting Buck as he took several more shaky steps, turning him back and walking him toward the bed. Emma and Jimmy helped him back down and under the covers.

“Now I’m gonna go fix some lunch. You two stay out of trouble while I’m gone.”

“Emma? Thank you.” Buck called after her.

Buck lay awake listening to the sounds of the night. Coyote sang to the moon. Crickets searched for mates, their sound filling the air in a comforting lullaby. The horses stomped and snorted before settling in.

He heard Emma and Sam retire for the night, heard the bunkhouse door close as Jimmy did the same. Kid and Lou had gone back to their home. Teaspoon had not returned from town and Buck knew he had stayed in town. Quiet descended on the station house and Buck was wide-awake.

“Buck?” He heard her whisper from across the room.

“Hmmm?”

“Can’t you sleep?”

“No.”

“Are you in pain?” She got up from the cot under the far window and moved cat-like across the room.

“Not really. Just not tired.”

“Can I help?” Jen sat at his side, her hand reaching out to rest on his chest.

“Just what did you have in mind?” His mind headed back to a day, and night, that now seemed ages ago.

“Maybe a massage?” Her hand moved over his chest, her fingers playing mindlessly with his nipple.

“Is that what you call it?” His voice was growing husky, beyond his control.

“We could call it that.” Jen leaned over and kissed him, her lips parting to accept his tongue. His hand came up to touch her face. It still shook just slightly.

She stared into his eyes when she pulled away, the full moon casting enough light to see by. Smiling, she stood and lifted the nightgown she wore over her head, and he heard it drop to the floor behind her. Then she pulled the sheets back and tugged at the waistband of his long johns.

“Jen, I’m not sure…”

“It’s all right. If it happens, then great. If it doesn’t, then we’ll see how far we get and enjoy that much.” She crawled up onto the bed and straddled his chest. Leaning forward carefully, not wanting to touch his head, she offered her breast to his mouth, slipping the nipple between his lips. His hands reached up to touch her as he began to play with the firm little nugget she gave him, sucking gently and running his tongue over the tip. Her hands rested gently on his shoulders while he tasted her. Her breathing grew rapid. But she wanted much more.

Pulling away she began to kiss him, moving from his lips to his jaw and down his neck to his shoulders. She paused at his nipples on her way down, sucking on them until they, too, were hard. Then she kept going downward, her breasts moving against his skin as she went. As she traveled she ran her finger around his navel until her mouth caught up. She traced the path of dark hair further down with her hand, stopping just short of touching his member. Her mouth headed straight there, taking him inside her and sliding him as far in as she could. She moved up and down on his shaft, the muscle responding to the warmth of her mouth and caress of her tongue. She pulled him out, stopping at the tip and sucking on it. Then her mouth moved down to his scrotum, her tongue moving over him before sucking first one testicle and then the other. Making her way back to the tip she was pleased to see that he was erect. She took him in her mouth again for good measure before straddling him once more. She slipped him inside her moist tunnel.

Sam stood outside the bedroom door, catching sight of Jen’s alabaster skin as she moved on top of Buck, her small breasts moving up and down. He backed away and headed quietly back down the stairs. He entered the lower bedroom and crawled back under the covers with his wife.

“Is everything all right?” Emma asked sleepily.

“Just fine Darlin’.”

They both heard the slight creek of a bedspring before silence descended again.

“Maybe I should check.” Emma said, still not quite awake, but devoted to the young man’s care.

“Now Emma. Jen is up there. She can take care of him. And if there’s something she can’t handle, she’ll ask for help. He’s fine.” He drew her close to him, his hand resting on her swelling belly.

Jen moved slowly and gently, her internal muscles working him. She sighed. Her hands moved up and down his chest as his moved up her thighs to her center. His thumb roughly found her nub and as gently as he could rubbed against it. She gasped, shivers running up her spine.

He was breathing heavily, feeling himself hardening even more as she worked him inside her. His eyes closed in contentment. She was managing to move on top of him with a minimum of noise, just an occasional creak or groan of the bedsprings. In the back of his mind he hoped no one heard, and if they did, that they would just assume he was shifting position.

They were still silent as Jen began to move faster, her breathing increasing just slightly in her excitement. She threw her head back, her long blond hair cascading down her back.

Buck knew he was close, too close. She was incredibly tight around him, bringing him along very quickly.

“Jen!” he whispered, but his voice was lost on her as she continued to ride him. She was gasping slightly, loud enough that only he could hear. Then she held her breath as she pulled up, almost pulling him out of her, then slid back down to his base. Without realizing it she tightened her muscles even more and he exploded inside her as she collapsed forward on his chest. She kept him inside her as she leaned forward to kiss him.

They both slept very well that night.

Jimmy began spending his lunch breaks upstairs with Buck and Emma, helping Buck begin to walk again. They all noticed the sluggishness in his right side as that leg kept threatening to give out. But they never let him fall. He wouldn’t have considered trying this without at least one of them at his side. His balance was affected and he kept leaning forward, a characteristic that many people had when first becoming blind. The head brace didn’t help much either.

The exercise managed to tire Buck out and he no longer objected to resting in the afternoon. Emma would crawl up onto the bed next to him to nap herself.

Buck was the first to hear their visitors as they climbed the stairs. Realizing that Emma was still asleep next to him, he reached over and touched her shoulder, shaking her gently awake.

“Hmmm?” she asked sleepily.

“We have company.” Buck had recognized Doc Barnes’ steps, but not those of the other man.

Emma sat up as the men knocked gently on the open door.

“Afternoon Doc.” She said as she moved slowly off the bed. “Doctor Neal! We didn’t expect to see you back here. Can I get you gentlemen some coffee?”

“No thank you Emma. I’m on my way to Fort Kearney, but I wanted to stop and see how Buck was doing.” Dr. Neal said as he sat his bag down on the nightstand. “So how are you feeling? How about the headaches? Still getting them?”

“Still have one, but it’s no where as bad as it was, just kind of always there. I can usually ignore it. How soon before this board can go?”

“How about today?” Dr. Neal sat on the edge of the bed and began his exam.

Dr. Neal untied the board from Buck’s head and chest, then unwrapped the bandages from around the incision. Satisfied with the way it was healing, he wrapped fresh bandages around it again and checked reactions in Buck’s limbs and fingers.

“Any change in the eyesight?” he finally asked Buck.

“No, not really. Still just seeing a lot of black with some bright spots occasionally. Sometimes more spots than others.”

“Buck, you realize that there may never be a change now. The more time that goes by with no improvement, well it could mean that you’ve got what you’ve got.”

“I know.”

“Have you thought about the next step? There are special places that can help you deal with your blindness, that can teach you how to function.”

“We can do that here doctor.” Emma spoke up. “We don’t want to send him away. He’s got family here that will help him learn everything he needs to learn.”

“That’s good to hear.” Doctor Neal snapped his bag closed. “I can recommend some books that might help out. I would have to say that there’s nothing more either of us can do.” He said indicating Doc Barnes at his side. “The rest is up to you young man. Go easy. Be careful of the head. The incision is healing well, but if you overdo right away, you’ll regret it. Try to get on with your life. And good luck to you.”

“Thanks Doctor.” Buck said quietly. Relief mixed with despair. He was being allowed to finally get out of bed with the doctor’s permission instead of on the sly, which meant that he would soon be able to move back to the bunkhouse and get back to normal. But there was despair knowing that he would never be normal again. He had held out a small sliver of hope that his sight would return. The doctor’s recommendation that he go away to learn to deal with his blindness meant that the doctor had no hope. It was final.

Emma walked the doctors outside then headed over to the barn. She invited Kid and Lou to stay for supper and asked one of them to ride into town and make sure that Teaspoon and Sam would be there too. Then she pulled Jimmy aside and explained her plan.

When the chores were finished, Jimmy slipped away and headed into the house and up the stairs. Emma was keeping Jen busy helping with supper. When Lou came inside Emma managed to keep her from heading upstairs to visit her friend.

“But I haven’t seen him all day, Emma.”

“I know, but he needs a little time to himself right now. In the mean time I need some help with supper.”

“Jimmy’s with him.”

“Okay he needs some man time. Now chop.”

Lou looked to Jen for reinforcement.

“Sorry Lou, she won’t let me go up either.”

She kept the girls busy until the others arrived and dinner was ready to serve. She had everyone take a seat.

“Okay Emma, now what’s up. This is very nice, but what’s the occasion?” Teaspoon asked from the head of the table.

“We’re going to celebrate.”

“Celebrate what Emma?” Kid asked.

“This.” She moved to the bottom of the stairs. “Okay Jimmy!” she called out.

Step by slow step Jimmy helped Buck maneuver the stairs. He was barefoot but dressed, clean white bandages around his head the only obvious sign of injury. He was indeed weak and shaky, leaning heavily on Jimmy, but he was upright and moving.

Lou moved her hands up to her mouth, tears clouding her eyes, while the others broke into smiles.

“Well, I’ll be.” Teaspoon said quietly.

Kid and Jen both moved to help as Buck and Jimmy reached the bottom step, but Emma held her hand up to stop them. They moved back to their seats as the two kept moving slowly until they reached the chair next to Jen’s.

“Right in front of you.” Jimmy said lowly as Buck reached out to grab the back of the chair. “Move to the left. That’s it.”

“Shall we eat?” Emma asked as Buck then Jimmy sat. “Mr. Spoon, would you say grace?”

Buck felt uncomfortable during the meal, even though he knew he was among family that would not judge him for what had become his fate, but only wanted to help. He had no confidence in his ability to eat a meal without most of it landing on him instead of in him, and his head sometimes felt as though it were wobbling or floating on his shoulders.

If he made a mess of himself or embarrassed himself in any way, no one made comment on it. Jimmy seemed to take on Buck as his responsibility for this meal anyway, quietly telling him where each item on his plate was located, the mashed potatoes to the east, roast to the south, his water glass to the northeast.

Emma finally agreed with Buck that she and Sam move back to their bedroom and Buck take the spare room on the main floor. Emma agreed, only because Buck would not have to maneuver the stairs as he got back on his feet. For Buck it would relieve some of the guilt he felt at Emma having to take care of him so much.

And it was one step closer to returning to the bunkhouse. Which, if he thought about it, was not necessarily a plus. After all, Jimmy was sleeping there and Jen would not be able to slip into his bed after everyone was asleep as she had been for several days now. It was the one time during his day that being blind didn’t matter.

Buck pushed himself. He was quickly walking on his own. Eating was still difficult, but he kept at it. Keeping his balance was the most difficult of all. An additional dilemma was the sharp, lightening bolt pains that started up as he began moving more frequently. They snuck up on him without warning. They weren’t frequent, once or maybe twice a day, but they always caught him off guard.

Still, it wasn’t long before he was trying to navigate the lower level of Emma’s house, walking into the same table or chair repeatedly. His shins began to show the marks.

With the ability to move about came frustration. He had been able to ignore the fact that he couldn’t see anything up till now because there had been little to see, just the four walls of Emma’s bedroom. But now the loss was obvious. His temper occasionally rose to the surface.

Emma could only watch as the young man wandered about the house, trying to adjust. She felt powerless to help, at least now. Doctor Neal had promised to send some ideas that might help Buck adjust to a life to be lived in darkness.

Buck stood out on the porch of the house, his face turned to the late morning sun. His expression was a mixture of anger and sadness.

Emma watched him from the parlor window, her arms crossed over her expanding stomach. She worried about the young man. He had become withdrawn the last couple of days. This morning he had made his way to the door, and with just a moment’s hesitation had found the knob and walked out. He’d been standing there for hours now. She finally couldn’t stand it any longer and joined him by the rail.

“Buck, you know you can talk about it.”

Buck was silent, his jaw moving slightly.

“None of us know exactly what you’re feeling, what you’re going through. But we’ll all listen to you if you feel like talking about it. And we all want to help.”

“Nothing anyone can do, so why talk about it?”

“Might make you feel better.”

When Buck was silent once more, Emma turned to leave, her hand resting briefly on his arm.

“Did you know that the horses make a different sound when Kid comes around than when Jimmy does? If you listen real careful you can hear the creek half a mile from here. There’s a pair of doves in the trees behind the bunkhouse. There’s a storm building to the west. You can probably see the clouds by now. And the child in you is growing and sitting low. I can tell the change in your walk. The women in my village would say that you were carrying a boy.”

“Buck, you may be blind, but you see more than most people.” Emma replied as she looked to the west and saw dark clouds building, her hand rubbing against her stomach. The child was indeed low. She walked over to the young man and took him by the chin, forcing him to move his face toward her. She placed a kiss on his cheek. Then she took him by the hand and pulled him toward the porch steps.

“Emma? What are you doing?”

“We’re going for a little walk.”

“Emma….”

“Shush. Now you’re at the steps. Use the handrail and feel them with your foot. Come on. That’s it. Okay feel the next one. Good. Keep coming.” Buck slowly took one step at a time until he was on the path in front of the house.

“The gate is straight ahead of you. Count the steps. A little to the right. Good, good. Just a little further.”

Buck’s left hand had moved out in front of him. He stopped when he felt the fence post.

“Now tell me what you see from here.”

Buck closed his eyes, a picture of the station yard in his head.

“The bunkhouse is that way.” He pointed directly to the building. “There’s one of the dogs lying in the shade of the barn and the grey mustang is in the corral. There are flowers blooming in your garden. The lilies I think.” He paused for a moment. “The clouds aren’t overhead yet. And there’s a rider coming.”

Emma’s head swung toward town and saw the small figure on horseback approaching. It took several moments before she could hear the drumming of the horse’s hooves. She could tell almost immediately who the rider was, some memories never faded.

“It’s Jimmy.” She replied and the two waited for Jimmy to ride up. The rider stopped at the fence, pleased to see his friend outside.

“Hey Buck. Emma, this came for you from Doctor Neal.” Jimmy said as he dismounted and handed the woman a thick package about the size of a book.

“Thank you Jimmy. Where are the others?”

“Teaspoon is helping Sam out with some wanted posters and such. Jen is in town talking to her father. Maybe I should say fighting instead of talking. And Kid and Lou headed over to their place to work on the barn. I’m goin’ over to help as soon as I grab a few tools and check on a couple of the horses. That black’s been acting up a bit and I wanted to make sure he hasn’t busted the stall. And the roan was lookin’ a little bloated. Wanna come to the barn with me Buck?”

The two men walked off as Emma took the book into the house and began to read.

Buck was determined to relearn as many things that he used to do as he could. Ideas poured out of all of them, supplemented by ideas from the book that Dr. Neal had sent. Ropes lead from the house to some places, other paths were marked with posts every few feet or with rock or wood embedded in the dirt where Buck could feel them. He had already learned to count paces, and he quickly learned how many steps it took him to reach the barn, corral and bunkhouse.

His sense of hearing and smell, already sharp from early childhood training, increased. His strength returned, and except for occasional trouble on his right side, he was back to his original physical condition. Emma constantly resisted the urge to help him as he struggled with tasks that once were second nature.

Summer turned to early fall and with it came warm days and cool nights. Buck could hear the geese flying as he worked at the woodpile one afternoon. Winter wasn’t far away and they would need a supply of wood for the stove laid in.

Emma stood at the window watching as Buck worked at splitting small logs into stove size pieces. He would feel the log and carefully drop the hatchet into the end. Then he would lift the hatchet with the log wedged on the end and swing downward against a tree stump to split it. Then he would pick up the two pieces, feel them to make sure they were the right size, and stack them in a pile to his side. It took him longer than it would have taken Jimmy or Kid, but he was being useful. And it freed Jimmy up to do other work.

When Buck suddenly froze in place, Emma knew something was wrong. She left the house, calling his name as she stepped off the porch.

“Don’t come any closer Emma!” He yelled, still not moving.

“Buck what’s wrong?”

“Rattler. And I can’t tell where it is.”

With the cooler nights upon them, rattlesnakes usually started to find places to hibernate for the winter. But when the days were warm, almost hot actually, they came out looking for sunny places to warm themselves before crawling back in for the night. Apparently one had found a spot in the woodpile and Buck had just disturbed its nap.

“Okay. Keep still. I’ll see if I can see it.” Emma moved closer, scanning the ground. She couldn’t see the reptile, but she heard it’s ominous rattle. “I can’t find it Buck. Jimmy’s in the barn. I’m going after him.”

She moved slowly until she was well away from the woodpile, then hurried toward the barn. Soon Jimmy and Jen both rushed toward Buck. They both stopped short. The rattler had wound its way out of the wood and now lay at Buck’s feet.

“Buck?” Jimmy whispered as loud as he could, not wanting to startle the creature.

“I know.” Buck said even quieter.

“Just don’t move.” Jimmy said as he pulled his gun from its holster.

“Don’t worry.” Buck said as he heard the revolver go off. When he heard the others moving toward him, he stepped away from the snake’s carcass. On the outside he appeared calm. But inside he was shaking.