Disclaimer: Um, nothing here is mine, unfortunately for my pour soul. It all belongs to the honorable Satoshi Tajiri, I thank him for bringing sunshine into my life; 4Kids, gawd they suck; Creatures; GAME FREAK; Nintendo; Kids' WB; and Wizards of the Coast.
Rating: Saying this is the edited version, PG-13. In the unedited version, James is gay because one of the places I'm gonna send this to won't allow fics where James is straight, so there.
Other: Sorry to the Togepi lovers, but Togepi is a Freaky Egg Thingy, out to rule the world after making the whole world his puppets. Togepi is just like Puppetmon! Oh and, uh, James eats Togepi somewhere in here. I love mail! Even hate mail! So e-mail me at chibi_washu@sailormoon.com or chibi_ryoko@gundamfan.com
Chapter 1: A Quiet Day in Pallet
It was a quiet day in Pallet Town. The dodrios were singing, Samuel Oak and Delia Ketchum were making "sweet" love; Ash and Misty were having a Pokemon battle, although to them it was like making "sweet" love; and Team Rocket was sleeping behind some dirt road shrubs, bushes, and trees, also making sweet love (four of the six people are sick, incurable perverts. NO not Jessie and James); and Meowth was checking out Pallet Town from a mile away from Jessie and James.
"Togepi! Get back here!" Misty yelled at the now psychotic baby egg Pokemon, who was always hurting its ugly self.
"Prriii!!!" Togepi responded, hiding a butcher knife behind its not very large back. (Translation: Soon you will see the full extent of my wrath!!!)
"Bad Togepi! Get o'er here before you hurt yourself!"
"To-Ge-Piii!!!" (Translation: Make me! I now have Washu, the greatest scientific genius of the universe, under my Puppetmon like control!!!)
"Is that a knife behind Togepi's back, Mist?" Ash asked.
"What knife my darling Ash?"
"Don't call me that. The one behind his back."
"Brriii?" Togepi said, giving a I'm-an-innocent-little-pokemon-and-I-have-done-nothing-wrong and confused look.
"Jessie?" James said.
"What James?" Jessie answered.
"Why isn't Meowth interrupting us?"
"I don't know James. Why?"
"He usually interrupts us about this time."
"When we're close to the end?"
"Yeah."
"Forget it James, let's just finish in peace."
Oh gawd, and they did, sort of. When they started kissing each other, it was like they were trying to rip each other apart.
It was sick, but the camera shot kinda moved up, so, I, the narrater, of the story only saw what was happening.
When Ash and Misty finished their battle, they decided to visit Professor Oak. But when Ash opened the front door, he saw...
WHO'S THAT POKEMON?!
(commercials)
IT'S, UM, CHIKORITA!
CHIKA!
Anyway, Ash and Misty stumbled upon Mrs. Ketchum and Prof. Oak, um, uh, you know, "doing it."
"Mom! What are you doing!" Ash shouted in horror. Being the 15 year old he is, you'd think he'd figure it out, what with his mom moaning and all.
"Ash! You fuckin' idiot!" Misty exclaimed. "They're, ewww, doing it?"
Then Misty broke out in a seizure.
Back at James' and Jessie's hiding place...
Meowth came back and saw Jessie sleeping with James sleeping on top of her, they were both naked, but a sleeping bag covered them.
"Hey, pervs!" Meowth shouted.
Jessie and James didn't wake up.
'Could they be dead?' Meowth thought, so he kicked them. They woke up.
"Meowth! You dimwit!" James shouted, while getting up off of Jessie.
"Stay on top of her! Please! I don't wanna see Jessie's tits!" Meowth shouted again.
James fell back on Jessie, which woke the bitch up.
"James!" Jessie shouted, ready to whack him with her paper fan.
"Don't Jess! Meowth's here!"
"Huh!" Jessie saw Meowth with a weirded out look on his face. Just then Meowth puked.
"I'll leave now, I don't wanna see Jessie's tits or James' dick," Meowth said, turning green.
"What a sad Pokemon," Jessie said, pushing the loose strands of her hair out of her face.
"I know," James said.
When Misty was done with her seizure, she laying down on a couch, with Prof. Oak and Mrs. Ketchum (both fully clothed) standing over her, and she saw Ash sleeping on the love seat.
Ding-dong! the door bell chimed.
"Hey hello! Is anybody there?" Brock asked through the other side of the door.
Prof. Oak went to open the door and greeted Brock friendly enough, which weirded out poor Brock.
"Hi Misty and... Ash?" Brock said.
"Oh, hi Brock! Ash fainted," Mrs. Ketchum greeted.
"Oh um hi, Mrs. Ketchum," Brock said.
"Tea, Brock?" Prof. Oak asked.
"Uh, no thanks, I'm not really thirsty."
"Krabby, go get Brock some tea."
"No! I'm not thirsty. I just came over to give Ash this letter from Giovanni." Brock slipped the letter into Ash's closed hand and ran out of that house as fast as he could.
"Krabby, go get some tea for Brock," Prof. Oak said, which made Misty faint.
Jessie and James had finally gotten dressed, but not in their uniforms. They were dressed as Ash and Misty, James wasn't cross dressing for once!
"You perverts!" Meowth shouted. "Put yer uniforms on!"
"Why should we?" Jessie and James asked.
"We still need to capture dat fat ass Pikachu from dat twerp! Duh, you fuckin' idiots!" "Don't call me a fuckin' idiot!" James whined. He dug in his pocket and pulled out a rice ball. He threw it at Meowth.
Jessie whacked Meowth upside the head.
Meowth fury swiped them in return.
Brock came running by and stopped when he spotted Jessie, James, and Meowth. "Giovanni says good morning and to capture that God-damned Pikachu," Brock said as Jessie and James looked at him in a weirded out way. Brock rushed off.
