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“The way I feel” / _JESSIE_

Part 4- The things you have to do for yourself

“Jessie, get your butt over here and listen to this!”

Amanda was reading something in the newspaper. She was Jessie’s friend and a waitress in the little cafe that Jessie was working in. After leaving James’ estate a few months earlier, Jessie had nowhere to go to. At first she tried to go back to the Team Rocket HQ, but she met Meowth there and he told her that the boss is really pissed off at her and James, so she won’t be welcomed there. So Jessie decided to go downtown, she rent a small apartment and started working in a little cafe near her new home. Everything started to go pretty well to her, but one thing was still missing- She couldn’t stop thinking of James. Did he miss her to? Or maybe he was too angry at her for leaving him after she’d promised to stay, so he hated her?

“What is it?”

Jessie was really tired that day and she could hardly drag herself around.

“Listen to this-“ Amanda started reading: “`A young millionaire collapses during board meeting.` `James Morgan collapsed yesterday during the annual board meeting of the rich Morgan family’s businesses...` HA!” she laughed in disparagement, “Those rich people, some troubles they have... he probably had too much money or something...” Amanda laughed but Jessie was in total shock.

“Give me that!” She snatched the paper out of Amanda’s hand and read the small article: “James Morgan was under a lot of stress lately, between his divorce from Jessiebell Morgan and the new responsibilities he had, taking care of the family businesses that his late parents had left him a year ago...”

Jessie stopped reading and threw the paper on the table. “I gotta go see him!”

“What are you talking about?” asked Amanda, “Do you know that man?” Jessie took off her apron and threw it at Amanda.

“Tell the boss I had to take the rest of the day off. I have a personal emergency.”

“Jessie! Tell me what happened!” Amanda yelled but Jessie was already catching a cab. Everything happened so fast, she didn’t have no time to think it all through, so even if James didn’t want to see her, she was on her way to see him.

While standing in front of the tall gate, Jessie started to regret coming back to the estate. Maybe James is angry at her and doesn’t want to see her? Maybe he will kick her out...

She was about to turn around and go back to the main road to catch a cab back to her apartment, when she suddenly saw him, walking through the gardens. He looked so thin and weak, So sad and lifeless. Seeing him like that was really Heart-breaking, she felt so sorry for him and her eyes filled with tears. He went towards the gate and suddenly he noticed Jessie standing there.

“You!” his eyes filled with tears. Jessie just stood there and didn’t say a word. She was afraid that they will hurt each other with the things they wanted to say.

James came closer to the gate and held the bars with his hands. He truly looked like a prisoner behind the gate.

“Why did you come back here?”

She didn’t know what to say, and he continued: “Why did you leave me? You promised...”

”I know”, she said, coming closer to the gate and covering his hands with hers. He angrily pulled his hands from under her hands. “I explained it all in the letter...”

“The letter? A letter can’t hug me or kiss me goodbye, I can’t beg a letter to make you stay with me!” Tears fell from his eyes and he wiped them away quickly.

“I didn’t want you to make me stay, I couldn’t stay, and I couldn’t take you away from all...”

“From what?” he sounded angry, “From my `wonderful life` here? Look at me! Do I look happy to you?”

She didn’t know what to say to him. It had never occurred to her that this might *not* be what he wanted, that maybe without her, the loneliness was greater than the happiness of being rich and having everything he wanted. Everything he wanted...?

“I’m sorry, James”, she cried, putting her head on the bars and clutching them like she was about to fall down if she let them go. “I’m so so sorry.”

James gave her a soft look and came closer to her, caressing her cheek from between the bars, and pressing his forehead against hers.

“I don’t need the money and the power of I don’t have the one I love beside me”, his hands slowly covered her hands, “Nothing is important without you. Don’t leave me again...”