The Dreaded Rainbow

originally posted: 07/08/02

Brought to you by CONvergence 2002. That's right, I've been to another science fiction convention — and now you'll all pay! I did see and hear some interesting things.

CONvergence 2002 (so spelled to emphasize the "con" aspect, and to differentiate this event from a small Goth convention with the same name) provided the best hair-watching venue I've seen outside of London in the early 1980s. It was the men's hair I noticed most. Ponytails. Lots and lots of ponytails, most of them only an inch or two long. I saw quite a few grizzled grey manes that started behind the ears and straggled down the back like trickles of dirty water. Thanks to the bird's-eye view from the hotel mezzanine, I also witnessed several disturbing ponytail/combover combos. Friends don't let friends comb over, fellas.

The elvish prettyboys toss their pompous locks around like trivia tidbits, but few tie them back. They seem to be just waiting for a gust of wind to blow the hair off their shoulders in fashion-ad-like cascades. (Reminds me of the rock band Morbid Angel, whose stage setup, according to the Chicken Step Lady, includes several heavy-duty fans for this very purpose.) I sat behind one such guy for an hour, and he never ceased petting and rearranging his hair the whole time.

Just as interesting was the number of shaven heads. Invariably it's the young men who expose their scalps while the middle-agers try to cover them up or at least detract from the shine. A few of the 20-somethings even sported punk mohawks and Popsicle-colored dye jobs. It's so cute when the kids go retro.

The women were no slouches, though. I saw the usual flowing tresses with princess dresses. A few close shaves in this crowd, too, and a few elaborate crowns of braids. Note to enterprising con-goers: You could probably haul down some serious green if you set up a braiding concession in the Garden Court common area.

At least 75% of the dreadlocks I saw were on white people — not that there were many fans of color present for comparison. The most interesting set belonged to a woman of about 22 whose head was shaved from ear-top down. Her dreads were about a foot long, originally blonde, and each strand was dyed red, orange, yellow, green, blue or purple, or some combination thereof. They provided a lovely splash of color against the Goth blackdrop of her friends. She had the dreads twisted and woven into some sort of intricate nest on top of her head for swimming, which was even cooler than the balloon hats the children's entertainer was making.