Valvoline Forelock

originally posted: 11/01/01

Brought to you by who else but my literary hero James Lileks, describing the well-lubricated hair of 1950s matinee idols. You could tell the hero of the movie had rolled up his sleeves and gotten down to the business of saving the world when his Valvoline forelock became slightly mussed. Ah, those were the days! Or so I'm told.

These days it's hard to tell the flawed hero from the noble villain unless you read the fine print on their tattoos. Still, I think my favorite heroes are the ones played by Harrison Ford, who's always cast as a Regular Guy thrown into Distressing Circumstances. Ford is the greatest RG of all time, despite having perpetually bad hair. Nobody's better at pulling off the grim-lipped trifecta of consternation, determination and defenestration that characterizes his roles.

Tomorrow's band: Grim-lipped Trifecta