What is a Dog?
 
 

   Dogs lie around all day, sprawled on the most comfortable piece of furniture in the house.
 They can hear a package of food opening half a block away,
but don't hear you when you're in the same room.
         They can look dumb and lovable all at the same time.
         They growl when they are not happy.
         When you want to play, they want to play.
         When you want to be alone, they want to play.
    They are great at begging.
      They will love you forever if you rub their tummies.
           They leave their toys everywhere.
  They do disgusting things with their mouths and then try to give you a kiss.

Conclusion: They're tiny men in little fur coats.