Mood:  not sure

Being back in the Netherlands was, in a sense, a bit of a bummer. Of course there was the cold. And all details I had to arrange didn’t exactly add to the joy. Though from a financial and career wise perspective, coming back was probably a wise choice, for the emotional component it seemed to be not the best move ever. It makes you realise that you cannot step into a process that has been ongoing for many years, and then suddenly expect to be fully part of it. On top of that there was the sad passing away of a young person, who is both the younger brother of a close friend, as well as best friend with 2 other close friends. Makes you think about things when you're standing there on a crisp-cold, December morning to give your last respects...

Christmas was a drag, as it always is. Feels like running around with your head chopped off. I guess it’s just too many days of too many visits in too short of a time. Still, it was good to see how especially my grandparents were happy to see some visitors.

I guess that I dread these cold, dark, gloomy days because due to the short day-light period, time seems to slip through your fingers. All those days seem as if you only had done a fraction of what initially was planned. Even subsequent days don’t seem to yield anything, since public services and shops are still not working. Now the 1^st week of January has passed, I finally seem to be able to get some work done. My job interview in Germany will be coming up soon. I’m quite curious what it’ll be like. Will it get me where I wanna go ? And do I know where I wanna go ? I’ve turned 35, and by now I need to know at least a bit what I’m heading for. So far it doesn’t look yet as if I really had a clue…