Crisis - followed by B-day Zoo & Church
Mood:  don't ask
Topic: Everyday life (weirdness)
Last night there was another crisis. After another one of her futile attempts to mellow me up she broke down and cried. Next thing I know she’s gone down, and a minute later she comes back to the room, turns on the light and stands there with a small knife, the kind you use to peel your apples (or any random similar fruit). She gives me the suicide thingy, asks me to tell her how to slide her wrist, cause she “can’t live without me”. Gita wakes up as well, but fortunately she is still a bit sleepy. I pull wheeping Wiwik out of the bed room, hissing to her to go down the stairs. Then I go back to the bedroom. Don’t worry sweetheart, mommy is crying cause she hurt herself when she just slipped on the stairs, just go and sleep first sweety.Subsequently I go down to deal with matters there. I try to muffle her sobbing so Gita won’t hear, but eventually I put an end to it. Listen, I tell her while I firmly hold her face. Do you realise that just now you were standing there with that knife, claiming you want to kill yourself, in front of a little girl that will turn 6 tomorrow. I point out that she has a major responsibility on her hands. A responsibility that neither ex-hubby or I didn’t want, but rather couldn’t have cause she claimed her rights as a mother. A responsibility where handling knifes and talking suicide don’t fit in. If you ever, ever, cause our child a major trauma by doing similar things, I will never forgive you. And as far as things between us are concerned, let me tell you one more last time that the only connection between us is that you’re the mother of our child, and nothing more than that. That means you don’t need to expect anything from me and you know very well the reason being that half a year ago you blew 6^th chance in line in your traditional cruel ways. Having said all that I manage to settle things down.The next morning, when one child after another appear, the house slowly turns into a zoo. Some parents stay around for the first 30 minutes, and I’m subsequently introduced as either “a friend from Malaysia” or indeed as Gita’s father. MMhhh that’ll raise some confusion. Later that afternoon we leave to attend a service in a kind of an Indonesian church. The people there, I must say, are indeed a truly warm and loving kind of people. The funny thing is that without any prior information, one of the church leaders who comes up to us, directly assumes I’m Gita’s father and his first remark is how remarkably her face resembles mine. My next surprise comes when the service actually starts. Everything is in Indonesian, but I can understand it very well. They speak about going about in life in honesty and sincerity, and I can see how Wiwik is so totally absorbed in the prayers and the songs, up to the point where tears roll down her face. It puzzles me enormously how she can be so devoted, while to me she is, in daily life, still so far away from the true meaning of her religion, in view of her failure to practice things such as honesty and sincerity towards the people who try to be good to her.

crispy winter day
Mood:  cool
Topic: Everyday life (weirdness)
My 1st day in The Netherlands starts with waiting for luggage. Eventually I redistribute some of my things over the bags and I walk towards the customs. After all the extensive safety procedures on boarding every plane, surprisingly now I walk straight through and there isn’t even anyone to ask for my passport.
A fellow Dutch tries to rip me off when buying a card for my handphone and the girls at the foodstall are unwilling to change some of my money into coins for use in a public payphone. Trying to save some time I pop rightaway on a train, but it’s not my lucky day. The delay costs me 1 hour extra and leads me to wait, ironically, in the city where I once used to live for 3 months only, due to the fact that I resigned my job there after 5 weeks. That move (both to and away from the city) might very well be what turned out ot be one of the core decisions leading to me leaving The Netherlands.
But I’m lucky as well; yes, winter it is and I guess the temperature must be somewhere between 5 and 10. but this is one of these days with a crispy, blue-white sky and a low-standing sun, couragously trying to lighten up the spirit of the people in the streets. It is one of those days that you are actually quite happy to go out of the house, catching those few rays of sunlight, even going for a stroll in the forest, though all the trees are bald and leafless…

However, some trees these days are very entertaining...

X-mas in Malaysia
Mood:  special
Topic: Everyday life (weirdness)
Prior to my departure to the cold Netherlands, Liza & I decided we ought to get some pics of how X-mas is celebrated in Malaysia. As could be seen from the pictures I posted last year, it's already quite obvious that this festive season is not forgotten or ignored. One of the nicest pics we took was the one of the gingerbread-woman.

Top Hat Room
Mood:  suave
Topic: Night life & other action
Last month we had the 3-yearly international O&G symposium of FIGO in KL. A chance too good to be true. I presented a poster about a Hodge pessary ending up in the abdomen and I also volunteered to be speaker coordinator, which unfortunately deprived me of the opportunity to visit some of the presentations that interested me most. I happened to meet three of my former consultants. One of them was part of the very beginning of my career in O&G in the very first hospital where I worked as a Medical Officer. Having always been on good terms with him we enjoyed our encounter and decided to have a dinner later on. Due to extreme rain all three of us battled our way through the streets that had turned into floods all over Chinatown. Since all of us had a good time, we decided to have another dinner together with Liza on the last day of the symposium.
That Friday we all gathered and headed for one of the few remaining colonial buildings in KL, the "Top Hat Room". A small, charming colonial villa, almost opposite of KLCC. We enjoyed a nice meal, after which we proceeded to the first floor. In an attic-like setting, the jazz band had already started playing for a while. It’s been another splendid night, and it’s always good to meet up with old friends and acquaintances that have inspired us in the past…

34 ?!
Mood:  amorous
Topic: Night life & other action
Yes, I know, that was about a week ago. but I can’t just let it pass by unnoticed. I didn’t elaborately celebrate that 34th year. But it was defenitely a quality celebration. My little gem had prepared a special surprise for me in the form of my favourite substance; ice(-cream). It truly was a lovely surprise.

And I love my little gem for all these small gestures of affection. It has opened a whole new world for me, for I have never felt this special before. I think, having both been through quite some rough times, we are able to appreciate each other even more. Sure, I know that many things in life don’t last forever… but I hope that a good thing like this will stay with us for the longest time. It will not be easy. There will be struggles, juggling busy career while establishing a relationship and having a social life. And for sure there will be some other challenges too. But also for sure, this is more than worth it to give this our best efforts.

Judgmental
Mood:  cheeky
Topic: (scary) hospital stories
Ok, here’s the deal; on a regular basis we male gynae’s have to defend our existence in the job. Especially in this local setting it is a quite common thing, whereas in most European countries it is not such a big issue perse. Although I can imagine this, I never fail to be amazed, judging the way I see most of my female colleagues go about. They are, in average, way less gentle (if not just plain rougher) than most of our male gynae staff. It is as if they are trying to make a statement such as; “Hey, if I can go through a (i.e. painful) process of labour, you might just as well cope with me now.” Come to think of it, I've heard some of them actually say that... Whereas men probably have an approach such as; “Since I don’t know what it feels like, I might just as well be extra careful and gentle”.
A nice equivalent to this matter I couldn’t withhold from you all. According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of a man than they do undressing in front of a woman. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.
(Jay Leno)

Inside-out, upside-down
Mood:  bright
Topic: (scary) hospital stories
Was doing a caesarean the other day, and my HO asked me whether it was ok for her to remove the placenta. Sure, no prob, I said and I instructed her. Everything went smooth, I turned my attention to the cute baby and next thing I know when I look again, suddenly the uterus is inside-out… Both the HO’s as well as the gas-MO’s heart stop for a moment and my heart rate goes up as I struggle to put the darn thing back in its original position. Finally – plop – I succeed and the rest of the procedure is uneventful. I can’t help but exclaiming to the HO; “Thanx for adding flavour to my life”. Upon the disappointed look on her face I realise she must have been as anxious as me. Don’t worry, I tell her; it would probably even have happened if I took the placenta out… And see it like this; at least know we both added up on our experience…

The Banquet; who killed the empress ??
Mood:  amorous
Topic: Everyday life (weirdness)
Spent a lovely evening @ L’s place yesterday. We finally got to watch The Banquet, which we had missed out on due to rapid disappearance from the theatre. Allegedly there is supposed to be an analogue to Shakespeare’s Hamlet. I guess I’ll have to read that one first before I can fully grasp the story, but maybe it was also just because I was tired. Of course the choreography was great, but the only thing dissatisfying was….. who killed the empress in the end ?! For all the assassins had been assassinated already. MMhhh… anyone who thinks they can give us the answer, please feel free to comment ;op
Since it was late already and we were also already cuddled up, we decided I might just as well stay over. Later that night apparently sis came back a bit tipsy. Not that much, since she was still very well in control. Well, most important thing was she had a great evening and a chance to get her mind distracted from troublesome things. Good for her !

Hospital FBI
Mood:  mischievious
Topic: (scary) hospital stories
Ever since I performed a pseudo-military coupe / putsch on the making of the night duty schedule I’ve felt as if I’m in charge of the Malaysian anti-corruption agency. Unbelievable what some colleagues will do to reduce their number of night shifts, up to paying colleagues to do their night duties in their name. When V. asked me why I gave her 8 shifts in November I told her it was because of her low cumulative, having only done 6 last month. “But I did 7 shifts last month”, she exclaimed. I bluntly said “Nope, don’t forget you pushed one of them to J.”…. The look on her face, when she realised I had found out…. No corruption; everybody the same number of calls, I told her. Takes a bloody Dutch Fluffy dude to get things straightened out in this cuckoo-place…

Dogs in Sweaters
Mood:  caffeinated
Topic: Everyday life (weirdness)
I’m sitting here in Bodegas, enjoying my nice Illy? double espresso machiato, while having a good view out on the street. The not too loud background lounge-music mixes with the voices of people spending a relaxed afternoon out. Across the street there is a salon. Not very busy, since it’s a public holiday, however, the people inside are very entertained. A small dog wearing some kind of sweater is testing the strength of the jeans of one of the salon workers. The dog, having put its teeth in the leg of the jeans, is dragged over the floor by the salon employee, making all the other people inside laugh. Good times, good times…
I’m passing time here, having been dragged out by a not so extremely close friend, who needed to talk to me but also had to teach a music class @ the same time. Never mind, gives me some time to spend in this rather attractive environment. The only thing I wonder about is what she wanted to discuss. She fits perfectly in the category of remarkable people that somehow always cross my path, so it’s probably gonna be a remarkable story…