1. Get boxes of condoms & randomly put them in peoples' carts when
they're not looking.

2. Set all the alarm clocks to go off at 10-minute intervals.

3. Make a trail of orange juice on the floor to the restrooms.

4. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, "I
think we have a code 3 in house wares" and see what happens.

5. Put some M&Ms on layaway.

6. Move CAUTION WET FLOOR signs to carpeted areas.

7. Set up a tent in the camping department, tell others you'll only
invite them in if they bring pillows from the bedding department.

8. When someone asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why
don't you people leave me alone."

9. Look right into the security camera and use it as a mirror while you
pick your nose.

10. Dart around suspiciously while humming the theme from ''Mission
Impossible.''

11. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he
knows where the anti-depressants are.

12. In the auto department, practice your Madonna look using different
size funnels.

13. Hide in the clothing rack and when people browse through, whisper,
"PICK ME, PICK ME."

14. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal
position and scream, "NO! NO! It's those voices again."

15. Go the the fitting room and yell real loud -- "Hey, we're out of
toilet paper in here."