KAGOME IS HELP CAPTIVE BY SESSHO-MARU, UNDER THE DIRECTION OF THE DIABOLICALLY VINDICTIVE MR. BIMBLE! OH, NO! ::F-DIMINISHED CHORD:: AND NOW, WITNESS THE THRILLING (BUT VERY SHORT) CONCLUSION.....
Kagome: Heeeeeelp!
(Miroku rises out of the dirt like an avenging.....dirty monk.)
Miroku: You fiend! How dare you attack Lady Kagome! Witness the Buddha’s Wrath ultimate technique!
(He kicks Sessho-maru in the balls.)
Sessho-maru: HeeYIPE!
(He drops Kagome on Miroku, who is only too glad to catch her.)
Miroku: Ah, my lady, I’m so glad you’re safe!
Kagome: Yeah, I’m sure. (boot)
(The flying monk lands smack on Sessho-maru’s head, causing him to drop the Shikon shard he had filched from around Kagome’s neck. Kagome grabs it.)
Inu-Yasha: Now you die, brother! (charges)
(The sword clangs down on nothing, and everybody sees that Sessho-maru is gone. There is a faint cry in the distance that sounds like “Stratjik wthdrl, Misr Bmbul!”)
Inu-Yasha: Feh. He got away again.
Miroku: Yay! You’re safe, Lady Kagome!
Kagome: (boot)
Shippo: Hey, can it be.....? (scurries over to where Sessho-maru stood and pulls on a submerged box corner) SCOOBY SNACKS!
(He begins to happily chow down. Kagome runs purposefully back to the Bone-Eater’s Well.)
Inu-Yasha: Hey, where do you think you’re going?
Kagome: Home! I have to study! I should have left hours ago!
Inu-Yasha: You’re running away again?
Kagome: Sit!
(Inu-Yasha hits the ground with an audible smack.)
Kagome: See you later! (disappears into the well)
Inu-Yasha: Someday.....I’m going to get her for this.....
(In the distance, as Inu-Yasha, Shippo and Miroku enjoy their normal lives.....)
Sessho-maru: Mr. Bimble WILL PREVAIL!
(Impressive thundercrash. Lightning strikes Sessho-maru and fries him. He faints.)
Mr. Bimble: He’s such an idiot.
THE END