Nsync Has A Cooking Show?

Just when you thought a board game was going too far, the boys now have a cooking show (not really... but it would beat infomercials at 3 in the morning, right?) Each guy has their own little segment and bla bla bla (woo woo) in case you might get confused.

The Ghetto Kitchen

Hi, I'm Justin Timberlake, an' welcome ta muh ma fuckin cooking show 'The Ghetto Kitchen'. Today we's will be making uh delicious breakfast meal. First ya will need da number ta yo' local pizzaria, I would suggest looking in da phone book, under 'pizza' if ya can read. otherwise, dial zero an' ax fo' da nearest pizza place dat delivers. Call da number an' git what ever pizza suits ya bomb. Next, jet down ta da liquior mart, an' pick up uh couple o' 40 's. You might need uh fake ID or just gots uh brotha who has one do it fo' ya. You may also rob da swapmeet, but I wouldn't suggest dat as uh morining activity, thats mo' o' uh nightime exrecize. On yo' way back, head on in ta yo' local grocery swapmeet, an' git yourself some easy cheese, doritos, salsa an' some paper plates. once ya gots all o' yo' ingredients together, put da easy cheese on da pizza, garnish wiff da doritos, salsa an' place it on uh plate, serve wiff yo' 40 o' malt liquior an' dere ya gots it, breakfast iz served. what 'chew trippin foo'

Just a note-
Swapmeet is 'store' in case anyone was blatently confused, i was when I first read it.

Spaztastic

Alright, hi, I'm ::sniff: J.C. Chasez, and i'm here to basically ::sniff:: teach you all how to make my favorite meal ::sniff:: basically....
All you need for this simple meal is a 4 inch peice of washed celery, a tasty bullyon cube, or a teaspoon of the crystalized stuff ::sniff::. crush the bullyon cube and sprinkle on to the celery, or eat seperate ::sniff:: however you tend to enjoy it, basically. For desert you may have a dime sized mint.. if Joey doesn't eat it, or if Bobbi doesn't make you buy her another white tank top... I've basically began to stockpile my mints, because then if Joey says I can't have one, he can't just take them all away, because I have about 144 and one half mints... I ate the other half that one yesterday for dinner.... I find that if you eat it like a squirell people laugh and don't think to take it away... ::sniff:: wanna see my coke straw? i made it from a 100 doller bill. it's cool, and if the cops find it, i can just say it's my spending money, and that I was just about to buy some mints... yea.... ::sniff::
(stares at the camera with this suspicious, yet surprized look on his face, and periodically pulls out coke straw to snort a line or two... mumbles 'basically' for a little bit, this spanning 5 minutes)
Good nite everyone... ::sniff:: respect everyone ::sniff:: (snicker)

Down Home Mississippi

Hi! I'm Lance Bass, and I am your hoast here on the 'Down Home Cooking Show'. A little history for all of you out there.. I'm from Mississippi, and this show is an expression of my love for the 'Down Home Cooking' that people prepare down there, and I felt I needed to expose my roots, so to speak, since almost NO ONE knows where I'm from. I'm from Mississippi by the way.
Alright, lets start with this chicken here, we'll marinate it in a home made 'Bass Brand' maranade. It's made in Mississippi, where I'm from. Just marinate it for about 2 hours, slap it on the grill and you're done with the chicken. Isn't 'Slap it on the grill' a clever remark? thats what everyone back home says, back in Mississippi that is.
Alright, for side dishes, i'm going to make some steamed vegetibles, like they eat in Mississippi, where i'm from... you just steam them. I hope all of you know how to do that, everyone in Mississippi knows how... you all are IDIOTS if you don't know. Pshh.
Now to my favorite part of the show, where we trace my roots back to Mississippi. I'm from Mississippi, I was born and raised there, and that's the best place on earth, Mississippi is, I had a great childhood in Mississippi, where I grew up.
::JC walks on camera, slaps Lance and tells him to shut up::
Well- I have just been informed by the producer, that I talked to much and need to stop or else we wont finish our downhome cooking from Mississippi. ::wimper::. Um, steam the vegetebles, and serve with Chicken.. ::sniff:: That is all for the show today.. I'm from Mississippi... JC BEATS ME!!!!

Spa-get-ie

Hi, I'm ::squints at cue card:: Jooooeeeey Fat one? OH! I'm Joey fatone. Pshh, I messed up on my own name, ha ha! Um yea.... ::squints a little more:: A-n-d... and I am going to show you how to make a de- del- deilshus, huh? Oh, delicious meal today.
Who wrote this shit? ::camera pans to show Justin sitting on the floor, crayon in hand, and reading a dictionary, pans back to Joey:: Oh, doode, I see, well, i'm gonna wing it.... I'll show you what I know how to cook...
::produces a can of spaggetti-O's and a can opener::
Alright, so, you actually take this here thing with handless
::holds up can opener::
and put it on this can of O's.
::fumbles with the can opener, trying to apply the handles of them to the can, JC walks out, opens can and smacks him in the back of the head, walks off mumbling 'idiot'::
Ouch.. geez.... oh, anyway, just empty these into a pan and let si- sim- simmer, i learned a new word today!, for about 5 minutes. I will set this timer over here and we will wait.
::sets clock, and sets it down on the counter. as the timer goes off, Joey just stands there, watching the dust float through the air, completely oblivious to the fact that there is a loud buzzing sound coming from the timer. smoke arises from the pan, and he finally turns around::
Oh! dude, the O's are done.... um, are they supposed to be this hard?? Um, yea, well, we have to go now. Say goodbye justin
::camera pans to justin, still staring at the dictionary, with a frustraited look on his face, and holding the crayon, camera whips around to show Steve::
I'm Steve! Joeys' brother!
::JC walks over, smacks him in the back of the head and walks off mumbling 'rat bastard'::

Yea... Chris doesn't have his little bit, because frankly I'M LAZY and thats my story. I didn't want to spend more time on this because I have already been writing this for a month, because of my insane schedual between work and school, and having a social life... Chris' would have been half-assed anyway... so it's better to deal with nothing than being flogged for my poor-quality humor bit on Chris... I couldn't even think of what he would cook....

Special thanks to Da Ebonics Page Without which, Justin's paragraph would have been boring, inacuarate ebonics by yours truely.... but where the hel did 'swapmeet' come from? huh?

And it just occured to me that you all don't have my e-mail or AIM name. So, if you would like to contact me, my e-mail is space_cowgir1@hotmail.com please note that there is a numeral one in place of the L in cowgirl. my AIM name is honeyg7709

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