I DIDN’T KNOW
I didn’t know how much i wanted you
I DON’T KNOW YOU
I don’t know how to make you laugh
PERFECT EVEN IN DEATH
No one remembers
I NEVER KNEW
I never knew love
GOD I’M ASKING YOU
People say you took our son for good reason
WHERE IS MY SON?
Where is my son does anyone know ,
NEVER
He’ll never feel the comfort
POETRY PAGE 6
I didn’t know how much i could care
I didn’t know how much i could miss you
Till you were no longer there
I didn’t know my arms could ache
I didn’t know my soul could tear
I didn’t know my heart could break
Till you were no longer there
I don’t know how you like to play in the bath
I don’t know what outfit would suit you best
I don’t know in what position you like to rest
I don’t know the colour of your eyes or hair
I don’t know you cause your not there
Where you should be , here with me
Dancing around me full of glee
You were mine to have, mine to hold
But after you were born , your body went cold
I miss you and i love you it seems so unfair
That i should be here and you there
Alone and empty , drowning in love
I miss you so much my son above
But there’s anger , yes it’s come
Anger because life has lost and death has won
And with it comes anger at you
My dearest son i wanted you too
You died on me , how dare you do so
Leave me here alone and low
I wanted you here , i want you now
I stamp my foot and furrow my brow
I want you here , here with me
Dancing round me full of glee
I want to shout and screan and rave
My child , my child is all i crave
I want you , i need you
I have so much to give
But i can’t give it to you
Because you didn’t live
I cannot say why
Only thing i keep thinking
Is that nobody tried
You were mine , only mine
No one knew you like me
I don’t know why
He couldn’t just let you be
We shared so much
In our short time together
And the time that we shared
Has made memories forever
So much i learned
So much i lost
Everything turned
Tossled and tossed
Butterfly flutters
And then some kicks
Then that sad day
Was my mind playimg tricks
No cry , no movement
Not even a breath
As you lay in my arms
Perfect even in death
When i think of you now
At the age you would be
A beautiful “big boy”
Is the child that i see
My son you were
And my son you’ll always be
Author Amy Garner (Lil' Red)
Until there was you
I never knew hope
Until i felt you move
I never knew happiness
Until i heard your heartbeat
I never knew fear
Until i knew something was wrong
I never knew sadness
Until they said you were gone
I never knew anger
And i never knew pain
Until the tears fllowed from my eyes
I never knew what it is to hurt
To feel so dead and sad
I’ll never know what it feels like
To hear you call me mummy
And i have never known the emptyness
That my arms felt when they took you away
And that’s no doubt
But know God i’m asking you “what’s this all about”
Can you give me a reason why you filled us with pain
Why you took away our sunshine
And made it rain?
Can you give me an explanation of the being of this
Can you tell me why you took away our happiness,
Took away our bliss?
Can you give me a reason why you took him out of our hands
When you didn’t even give him a chance
To walk these lands?
Can you give me my answers
Or will they just be left there
Like an empty cloud floating around in thin air?
Can you give me my answers
Can you tell me why
You simply took the sunshine out of our sky?
Well.....
Can you?
If he is no more will my love still grow ?
Where is my son when i cry at night ,
Will this nightmare end when the day brings the light ?
If l close my eyes will i remember his face ,
Or , will time rob my memories leaving no trace ?
Where is my son , can this really be ,
Can anyone please help me ?
My child is gone who i loved so much ,
I went home alone no baby to clutch .
His brothers and sister were left to each other ,
If you are not here am i still your mother ?
An end to a beginning that barely began ,
Where is my son , i just don’t understand ?
Of his mummys’ arms
He’ll never feel our warmth and love
And of course his daddys’ charms
He’ll never get to play any games
He’ll never get to catch a ball
He’ll never get his mummy
To wipe the tears after he’s had a fall
He’ll never see a rainbow
He’ll never see the sea
He’ll never see the moonlight
And he’ll never see me
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