"God Took My Brother and Sent Me an Angel"
Ok now that you know a little more about me. But what you don't know is. As
I was growing up in this sometime ugly world. That life was not very easy.
We did not have much but what we did have was each other. We always
knew that this was the one true thing in life that we could always count on.
But then once again life has a way of throwing you for a hard awakening,
and that it did!
It was a little over 12 years ago now. I found out all that I knew that could be counted on,
no longer existed. (A loved one).
It was Jan. 30 1990. That I learn more than all the other 37 years of my
life put together. You see it was that date I lost my little brother.
At that moment it did not really hit me. But with in the next year I was
to learn you had better never take advantage of what you know is here and
is for certain because it isn't.
Treat each and every moment in life as if it were the last with the ones
you love becuse it very well may be.
All of the "what ifs" or "I should haves" and "if I had only" will never
happen from that moment on.
So take a little time to call that someone in our life. Tell them how
special they are, or send them a card, and last but not least always
remeber the last words they hear from you today could very well be the last
words ever spoken between you and a loved one or friend.
Now for the reason this page is called "My Angel" I know not everyone believes this way. But now know that God sends us Angels to help comfort us. Also I have heard that those who die today are not Angels. According to the Bible the Angels that are in Heaven are those that died Before Christ.
When my brother died I was mad at God for taking Chris to be with him. I was taught all my life "If you have as much faith as a grain of mustard seed you can move mountains"
You see I had all the faith in the world that Chris would live. (My mother sister and I even talked about us taking around the clock shift watching him).
But once again I was wrong. What they forgot to teach me with that was God will test your faith.
That he did.
I did not even want to see a preacher and forget anyone saying to me "Chris is with God now, You can be happy" Yes that made me angry.
Then not longer after his death I wanted closure. That I could not find.
I guess God knew what I needed just as he knew what was best for Chris. Because one night Chris came to me. It was like a dream. But very real!
I don't know how it happen but after my brother died he came to me. Spoke to me and lead me to see what his life would have been like if he had lived. Which was NOT a life that Chris would have choose.
Now let me back up one minute here. I forgot to tell you that Chris was very nice looking and knew it. Even though he was liked by all males and females he still knew he was a cutie and proud of it. Sweet as they come but vain.
During his wreck he broke every bone in his face, broke a leg, Swollowed his teeth, Had to have neurosurgery. But loving him as we did we were willing to except any challenge he may have and do what we had to as long as he was here with us.
So as I believe God allowed Chris to come here and show me why he took him and that it was our selfishness that wanted to keep him here.
Chris showed me what his life would be like. Chris was had severe brain damage and did not even know who I was, did not look like the Chris we knew. Nor would he have wanted to look. Befpre the was always outgoing wear a smile. Even had the nickname of "Smiley" and had a way to make everyone feel good about them self. Well not if he had lived.
Like I said in the beginning we did not have much which meant we would NOT been able to take care of Chris as he showed me. He had to go and live in a home where he did NOT know anyone there and was not taken care of properly just because we choose to keep him here. It was NOT Chris that lived in that vision that I was given by God.
It was his body. But the truth is that is was not his body that we loved. It was his outgoing, loving, caring, and sometimes weird ways that we loved so much!
Now I bet you are wondering where I am going with this.
What I have truly learn from his death is God knows what is best for each of us. He did not act for just Chris that day and what was best but he was helping us as well. Not that it would have been a burden but a heartache to watch Chris go from who he was to what he was NOT. Without the spirit of his personality and with the pain he would have had.
God knew and done what was best for Chris and for us.
 
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