This is just a collection of thoughts and ramblings, all that which goes on in my head day after day after day but that I am unable to share with anyone. I try to soothe the pain within by putting it to paper , but words will unfortunately never be powerful enough to really describe what I feel. Don't judge me on this please and remember that most of the time when I write I am deeply distressed and not really aware of what I'm writing. Over the years this diary has grown to a respectable size of nearly 500 A4 pages; I rendered myself down to papaer for all to see ; please treat it with respect!

Click here to see my online diary in a new pop up window. Some find it easier to view.

I've been writing in my diary ever since I was 13 (so that's a whole 5 years now). However I’ve only started writing my online journal in October last year (2000 that is.)