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*Monkey (to Leigha)*

There's a room with blacklights, and open windows in the early days of november.
A closet, made of mirrors and korn stickers,
and a dresser with a radio, jim morrison screaming inside.
There's all the posters, all the cigerette ashes she says they'll never find.
Under the bed are combat boots, chains, an empty lighter or two,
while on the bed she sits and tells us about how her favouite song is "daddy".
Thru the open door you can see the top of the stairs, like in a movie,
Down those stairs, we walk to the angel's silent hell.

We could've just gone away, we could've just made one more turn, and we'd be gone
but we didnt...
sometimes i wonder why
...you didn't have to go alone...

Look, a house,
her house.
not much bigger than the apartment we were just at.
There's a fence beside it, and before opening the broken door, we go to smoke.
Straight to the room with the jonathan davis posters.
Candles, candles, burnt matches, hidden cigerettes, candles, candles.
Closet full of black, doors of peace signs and airwalk stickers.
The floor shows that tori amos is a goddess,
The radio shows that courtney love is a voice.
On the waterbed with the canopy, she lies, staring at the ceiling,
a little more fragile than the rest,
a little more out of it than the rest.
Feet dangling over the edge, from army green cordaroys.
Arms laying beside from a pinkfloyd shirt (bearing marks of insanity).
The window's broken, other one nailed shut.
Seems like she's lost in that tiny room of hers.
Laughing, she always laughed
to hide her pain.
"hey monkey, i lost my prozac"
...a little bit more broken than the rest...
Lying there, she tells us she hates people.
she hates the world.
she hates herself.
but she doesn't hate us
we know her too well.
we're all burning within the angel's silent hell.
we're all learning to numb our pain.
we're all learning to not care.
everything i know i learned from her.
she showed us how messed up the world really is.
she showed us how there's nothing we can do,
except listen to music and light another candle.
We sit in silence, three lives decaying, one nearly

gone. And from behind our own barriers we watch her go numb,
knowing the end began when she was born,
so we let her slip away,
and let her have what doesn't matter anymore...
our souls all died together that day,
only she left our shells to rot alone.

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