Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Monday 6:03pm 22Jan07
Today's theme seemed to be about character and when someone acts out of character. My first conversation was about people who swear and better yet people who can find the perfect words to express themselves without the use of swear words. It's interesting how much more power a swear word has coming out of the mouth of a person who never swears. How do people react when someone who normally doesn't swear utters a curse word? How clear are we that a person who never swears is angry when she does swear versus someone who swears all the time? What a subtle way to portray a character in my writing that gets the point across so strongly.
I had an out of character moment today. I said something I would never have said in all my childhood years of being blamed for things that I didn't do. I said, "I will not take responsibility for that!"
There is a questionable taxi chit charge for $125. the photocopy of the coupon says that the taxi ride started at Yonge and College and went to Barrie. There is no date on it. The signature is a doctor's signature, a circular scribble.
I've been interrogated twice about this chit.
I was pissed off when I was first questioned about it. My initial thought was, "You honestly think that I'd take advantage?"
Then I was pissed off at the insistence that it was mine when I hadn't received one. Clearly the taxi chit police don't keep proper records like a sign out book to trace who got what.
That's not my problem.
The piss cutter is that aside from the fact that I don't know a soul in Barrie, I live downtown. Pretty much from any where down town, my cab ride is 8 bucks. I never think of asking for a taxi chit because even when I'm broke, I can afford 8 bucks home. I don't know how to do a doctor's scribble. I'm a pen and paper writer which means I have good penmanship. I sign my name or print my initials, you can read my name. Scribbles are not for me. Oh and the place that I was at, was not at Yonge and College.
The lack of date on the taxi chit means that it could have happened on any date in December aside from the date the Taxi chit police insist that I used it. The point of taxi chits are for people to use them when they're drunk so that they don't drink and drive. What are the chances that the taxi driver filled out the chit to whatever he wanted? It's not impossible. There are super educated taxi drivers and there are taxi drivers that are crooks. Hello! If there are crooks in corporate Canada, there are no crook taxi drivers? Come on!
Yeah the first interrogation pissed me off but the second interrogation immediately brought out my forceful, I'm not playing games voice. It was interesting to see it all happen from outside myself. Thinking, "Wow I would never have done this to an authority figure growing up."
I would have kept quiet and gone in a corner to cry about it. I would have been overwhelmed by the injustice of it but calling a spade a spade?
People think I speak up about everything but I don't. I let a lot of stuff slide. I still have incidents that I obsess about and say nothing. But today I realized that a person that acts out of character is faced with a situation where there is no other choice. In the Color Purple, when Celie grabs the knife and threatens Mister, she has no choice. That's the beauty of her breaking her years of silence and speaking up for herself. It's not even about her, it's about the letters, her sister, her family, something so much bigger than her.
My facing down the authority figure today was more than just the taxi chit. It was my reputation and coming face to face with how I may be perceived on a daily basis. It was a black person being accused by a white person and all the racial implications that I don't even want to scratch the surface of. I've given you all of this valid information and you are not hearing my words. I have no choice but to forcefully tell you, "I'm not taking responsibility for that."
EY
