Blogathon... again
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Well it's the blogathon again. Last year I stayed up and kept my friend Che of the shattered prayer company while she blogged. Plus I did my faux blogathon. Not sure how much I'll manage today as I'm not feeling well. But I'm here. Any extra posts will probably be at my Writing Zazen blog

And if any one comes by, go check out Che at the Shattered prayer and give her a shout out and better yet, donate some money.

EY

Incognito
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Friday 27July07

Seems I've been missing in action. I didn't realize that it's been a week since I've blogged. Hmm!

Well the wedding last Saturday was beautiful and a whole whack of fun. I got to see a number of friends that I used to work with at the Science Centre. People, for the most part, that I haven't seen in close to ten years. Tall Girl who has been in Newfoundland for close to ten years. VanJanDan who I did see last year but has been studying in New Mexico. I don't know why I always say Arizona. A brain fart, I guess. The bride who I haven't seen in about six years. It's all crazy how the time flies by and you look up and your this age and...
Good laughs though, good dancing and too much eating. I managed to keep my tears in check during the wedding but shed some big tears at the reception.

I bought Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows on the Saturday morning before the wedding and read about a chapter and a half. It took me four days to read the whole novel simply because I was trying to savor it. It was a nice end, a meaningful end and the expected redemption happened which was deeper than I'd expected. No spoilers here because Lolo is on Book 4 and I'm sure there are other people who may pick them up one day. And we all know how I feel about the media slipping out spoilers.

Do I get into a rant about the Tour de France and the doping scandals? sigh! Why bother? Cheating to win at your so called passion. You guys suck! Vinokourov, Michael Rasmussen, you suck!

Frog legs graduated from cop bootcamp and I got to meet her family. Proceeded to maul her youngest neice for about a half hour. It's not even right how cute that kid is. Told her she was like my kitten who I must kiss about 8000 times a day and proceeded to kiss her cheek about 8000 times.

And my Facebook surprise. My high school best friend found me on facebook. We traded emails yesterday since I had plans last night and was too excited to save the conversation for the phone tonight. Laughed at the memories we both had flooded back about each other and the silly things we used to say.

We spoke voice to voice this evening and she read me some of the letters I wrote her. Seems I was quite the letter writer then. And I'm not all that different now from the teenager I was. Even then, I'd back away from the crowd to take a time out. Clearly, I come by that trait honestly. She said, after I'd told her some juicy family tidbits, that she'd only been to my house once. As I think about it, she had to have been my best friend to have ever seen the inside of my house. Very few of my high school friends had ever been inside.

I was tormented by my relationships with boys then... Shawn, Derek, Floyd... nothing much has changed. As she told me her traumas, all I kept thinking was how we could have been there for each other. I lost my mother in Dec 1996 and she lost hers in Nov 1997. And all the other things that we barely survived.

It's wild how life works. How people disappear and reappear. How we drop out of sight for supposedly important reasons when we could be offering support. And now I live in Toronto and She lives in Brampton and it's not that far away by any stretch and we're still quite similar and I can see us being best friends all over again and it makes me smile.

She's planning to send me my letters so I can see my teenage handwriting and read what I was thinking and get in contact with so much of myself that I hadn't realized that I'd forgotten. What a gift as a person and as a writer.

And back to the Tour, I can't believe that on two occasions a rider has collided with a stray dog. What kind of dumbass brings their dog to the Tour de France and lets it run loose? I guess there are stupid people in France too. ha ha. They're everywhere.

That's the kind of week it's been. All about people.

EY

Harry Potter - the final installment?
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Friday 20July07

So I'm sitting here waiting for my laundry to finish and turn on my lap top and read an article on Yahoo about people in lines for the last Harry Potter book and I start blubbering. Yep, I'm sitting here crying because the final Harry Potter book is so damn close, mere hours away. Now, to be honest, I'm not really sure what I'm crying about. Is it just that it's been such a long wait for the final book. Or is it the writers dream of crazy line ups and celebrations? Could you imagine writing a series of books that are hailed around the world. A freakin' writers wet dream. Or maybe it's because last night I wrote the last chapter of White Wishes and as slow as it's going it's a step forward. And to think of a full novel is so much easier when I had the first chapter and the last chapter done.

hmm! And to think of a full novel makes me weep like a little girl. Fuck you Fergie, Big girls do cry! ha ha!

I am still amazed and baffled at all the media and newspapers and radio announcers that are leaking their fair share of Harry Potter tidbits. Really, is nothing sacred anymore? There used to be a time when reporters stood for something and even radio announcers stood for something. Melanie on Flow announced what the last three words are of the book. That other idiot JJ made some comment about how the book is for kids after all. Someone should stuff a bag of sport socks in his mouth, he talks such stupidness. Why do people want to ruin things for every one so badly? So you're not into the mania, shut the fuck up and don't spoil it for all the millions of us who are.

I fear that I'm going to ball my eyes out come the end of the final book, I say with a bout of hysterical laughter. I really expect that I'm going to cry. How funny is that?

I'm still debating whether I'll get the book early tomorrow morning before I have to meet up with my friends for the wedding that I'm attending. Since there is a 6 hour break between wedding and reception, I figure I could be half way through the book if I just sit in a corner and read. Is that wrong?

And while clicking around, I discovered that Jasper Fforde has another Thursday Next book coming out, "First among Sequels". I still haven't bought , "Something Rotten." It looks like I'll be buying at least four books this weekend: Harry Potter, The two Jasper Ffordes and AM Homes book about finding her biological parents. It's time to step back into reading fiends shoes.

I'm currently reading Beginning of Was by Ania Szado which is beautifully written for such rough material.

I can't get all hermit-like right now cuz it's still summer. Winter is best for the hermit routine. But I'm feeling like becoming a hermit, with too many books to read and pushing myself to read them all. I still have to get Jasper's other books, "The Big Over Easy" and "The Fourth Bear." Lord help me and my book addiction.

I got the kleenex ready for the wedding tomorrow. I didn't think that I was the wedding crier but after having gone to Tyrone's wedding and bursting into tears the moment he and his wife to be walked down the aisle with their mothers and crying through out the whole process (it's called a ceremony, isn't it?), I don't know about myself anymore. I used to be so good about not crying over every single thing. What the heck happened to me and why am I admitting it on the internet?

I had a depression breakthrough today. With a couple things seriously bugging me over the last few days, I felt that I could go down to that dark place. I thought about it some more today, while at work, and thought in loud thoughts, "WTF! Why get depressed about this? So a couple things suck the bag, getting depressed isn't going to change them."

Getting depressed isn't going to change a damn thing. But crying? Now that's a release and a relief, so I'll keep on crying over every silly little thing... Harry Potter, weddings, the Tour de France, the Olympics... ha ha
And depression? Fuck depression!

And the Tour de France isn't doing it for me that much this year, even though I'm watching it. I still haven't found someone to love in the Tour. Well, I lie, I was loving Fabian Cavellera ( sorry, I suck if I spelled it wrong). He was showing his balls with riding away with the yellow jersey for all the early stages and then announced in stage 8 (was it?) that he would work for the team and waved good bye and hasn't been heard from since. That's the painful part of the Tour. It's all about the team and not so much the individual. Of course that's what is so cool about the Tour too. That level of selflessness that you have to have. You could ride the race for years to help someone else, like a Lance Armstrong win. And you have to be happy about that. It's crazy and awesome and really all about the team.

EY

Grilled Cheese Sandwiches and Sleep
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Monday 16July07

I never did make it out to my last two shows for the Fringe nor to Dusk dances. I'd pushed myself to physical exhaustion and ended up spending the weekend in bed. Don't I just sound like a child that eats too much candy and then gets sick? Well I kinda am. I never said I didn't have issues!

I did catch the two stages of the Tour de France. The two best stages thus far. In the Mountains, separating the men from the boys. Emotional drama at it's best. As one of the commentators said, "One minute you're at the head of the pack and the next minute you're at the bottom of a ravine, climbing up and getting back on your bike and trying to catch up." It's like life isn't it?
I too was physically at the bottom of the ravine. I was so busted that I could only manage to go downstairs to the 24 hour depanneur (equivalent to a corner store in Montreal) and buy bread to make grilled cheese sandwiches. The thought of standing in the fresh obsessed and buying groceries was tantamount to a temper tantrum. It wasn't happening.

I did manage to get my ass out to Goldfish's fundraiser which had a good showing. I chatted up Objiwan guy with mild enthusiasm. Had three beer and met a new friend of Goldfish. New friend is Indian (from India) born in Kenya and from England. Talk about confusing. Was nice to have someone to hang with and chat about the arts. And even better to have someone to walk with back to the streetcar when it was time to leave cuz the walk was along a very darkened long ass street that could have proved problematic.

Happily today is rest day for the Tour but I'll have to watch the recap of all the previous stages since I missed more than I caught, overall. Yeah I'm sure the cyclists are even happier than I am about the rest day.

Had a couple epiphanies about a few people at work, not my guys but extended work mates. Somehow I could picture those situations in child form for my novel Dreamweaver. I've decided to take some of those situations and make them into school situations for my character to contend with. Isn't life just like a repetition of school anyway? It feels like it to me anyway.

And for White Wishes, I bypassed all the notes and the first chapters and have decided to work backwards. So I pulled out the final chapter for Book 1 and will be working backwards. I know where everything begins. I need to have the ending go back to the beginning.

And Women of the Fold trudges along at it's own pace, coming in when it needs to.

Mercury Retrograde is finally out of our systems. That may have also fed into my overall physical exhaustion. Let's recap my Mercury Retrograde just because: There was the groper who called me a bitch; there was the two ex boyfriends on the same night at the same bar sitting at my table, testing their "Do I still got it?" foolishness; there was the French kisser. And there was my always confusing feelings about the guy, should I continue to like him, am I delusional? yadda yadda yadda. Of course through all of this I met the Capricorn golfer whom I get along with so well. The last time I saw him I drew the line before it became an issue. I told him that I really like and enjoy talking to him. That I want to be friends and only friends, no lines crossed. "So let's not pull the stupid guy thing and try to see what you can get, Okay? Cuz I'm telling you now, what I want our relationship to be."

He laughed his ass off and said he was shot down before he even tried. ha ha! But there are some people you click with and know that you could be friends with them for a lifetime like my best friend in Montreal. I've since been calling him, my new best friend.

So that's my story about the men (I almost typed demented) for Mercury. And now we're in New Moon territory as of Saturday the 14th and we're hoping for a bit of smooth sailing. I'll have to discuss with the Borat lender if I can watch it after the Tour is over. I'm always paranoid when I have something that belongs to someone else.

My time that isn't spent watching the Tour, I'd like to work on my writing. I didn't write much, as you may have guessed, with my nightly artist dates with the Fringe and such. And now I am stimulated enough to sit down and crank it out. Summerworks theatre festival starts on August 2nd so that will be my next set of artist dates. Allyson of Theatre Rusticle has a show that she directed in it called Trudeau Stories. That is a must see!

EY

Two More Plays Left
Topic: WC - Daily Practice
Friday 13July07
Last night I took another day off from the Fringe and went to the Spiegel Show at the Spiegel tent down at Harbourfront Centre. A totally spectacular show that had me laughing like I've rarely laughed at a show before. I was so over stimulated when I got home that I couldn't get to sleep until after 2am only to get up four hours later. Luckily today was my leave work early Friday but I had to get my ass in early to have the benefit.

I was feeling shaky after work because I hadn't eaten enough so I crept over to the Corned Beef house and had a gigantic smoked meat sandwich. It wasn't bad, not quite as Montreal as they said but the best quality I've had in Toronto. No Cotts Black Cherry though. Gotta have Cott's Black Cherry with a smoked meat sandwich. come on!

Saw four Fringe Shows today: Eleanor; Funny Business, the musical; Labyrinth of water; and Yabu No Naku Distruthted. I walked out of my first show ever... Labyrinth. i didn't get it. I couldn't tell if the girl was a girl, a flower, a branch... And she kept waking me up every time I tried to sleep with her screams and weird ass noises. I finally decided to leave when I was staring at the red bell for the fire alarm willing it to ring. ha ha. I fell asleep for bits of Eleanor but not because I didn't like it but because I only got 4 hours sleep. Funny Business was so funny. It was all about office politics and office romances. A good hoot.

After I walked out of Labyrinth, I planned to walk home and then ran into crazy Mandy who was off to Yabu no Naku Distruthted and roped me into that. I had planned to see Jihad me at Hello but couldn't be bothered with waiting til 9:15pm since Labyrinth was still on and it was damn cold at the Robert Gill theatre. Of course I was the only person with polar fleece on. Everyone else was fanning themselves. sigh! I nodded off a bit in Yabu no Naku. It was an interesting show. I would have been better seeing when I was fully awake. And it was performed in an underground parking lot.

So now I'm home. The cats are begging for a little attention. Lala is running back and forth and meowing like the crazy kitten she is. Zoe is walking back and forth and blinking her big eyes at me. Picasso just threw up the biggest hair ball I've ever seen. And Quincy can't be bothered with any of us until I get into bed. Then she becomes alpha cat and edges me over.

I've got two more shows to see tomorrow and then I've done 14 shows. And that's it for me. I'm glad I did it but now I'm exhausted. Next week calms down, I have plans almost every night but not every night. ha ha! But my plans next week are people plans. My virgo buddy Vanjandan is in town from Arizona and I will be her wedding date for Saturday to see a work friend from our Science Centre days get hitched. Still don't know what gift I'm buying.

And I've got Borat to watch. My funny friend who drives me crazy but less so now that I know what to do to drive him crazy in return has lent me Borat. ha ha. "If you'd just talk on my digital recorder I wouldn't have to go behind the bar." I can't believe I actually said that.

Okay, I'm going off into coma sleep land smothered by four cats. Zoe joined the fold last night because they all missed me so much.

EY