Chapter 3

Suddenly I Became Me...

I would venture to guess that my earliest childhood memories are like most peoples, scattered and random. The points that one remembers were great events to them, though in retrospect they may seem to be rather small. I will explore the events I think of first, as these must have obviously left the greatest impression on who I am today.

I have a clouded vision of what went on twelve years ago, but don’t laugh, for these memories are all I have, of a child, a blonde haired, brown eyed boy. It is this little boy who put his trust in me, that I would fulfill his dreams. O where is that little boy now...

The night I learned to walk. I was at my grandparents’ house in Cedar Rapids. I’m not sure exactly how old I was, though I was somewhere near two years of age. I hadn’t been crawling for too long, and that night, I decided I was going to walk like my mommy, like my daddy, like everyone I looked up to. So I worked and worked, sometimes falling, sometimes crying because the task seemed too hard, but I got up and tried again each time I fell. Even though I was so young, I knew that if I tried enough times, I would succeed. And succeed I did. When I found out I could walk, that was all I did. I walked all night that night. Over to the kitchen, into bedrooms, back to the living room, and over and over again. I walked for hours that night, because I knew how to do it. I was just like Mommy and Daddy. I walked past eleven o’ clock that night, and slept where I fell through morning...

I was reading, always reading. I don’t remember ever being read to, but I’m sure this must have occurred, because something, somewhere, gave me the desire to read. And read I did. I would read constantly. Anytime you would see me, I had a new book I was reading. I think what most inspired me to read was that I read about what I liked. In my youth I was enthralled with dinosaurs, and my parents used this to help foster in me a love for books. Every week I received a new dinosaur book. I taught myself to read what was contained in it’s pages. I still have most of these books, and can almost recite them word for word. I attribute any and all success that I have had in school to this early love for reading. There is no secret formula to get your children to do well in school. All you must do is get them to love books. This is what made me. I found my dreams within the pages of books. I wanted more than anything to be an archaeologist when I grew up, so that I could see for myself the dinosaurs I read about every day...

I grew up in a lot of places, but my earliest memories come from the small town of Central City. Every year we had an annual Easter egg hunt at the church in town. Being so very young, the likelihood of me winning the contest was very small, and I did lose. But this year was different from the others, because there was also a raffle. And what was the prize? An eight foot tall, pink and white, stuffed Easter Bunny. Now guess who won the raffle. I took him home with me. He was my best friend. We played together, and shared secrets with one another, and just had a fun old time. But the bliss would soon end, however, because we were moving the next year. Around Easter time, my mother announced the move. She also told me that the bunny would not be coming. I brought up every argument I could think of, but to no avail. I had to give it up, because there was no room to take him with us. So, when it came time for the Easter egg hunt, my best friend was the prize. And how I hated myself for that one. I cried for a long time, many, many nights went by before I stopped missing him so dreadfully...

I could go on, but for the sake of time and length, I must end my sayings now. But not without saying that these, the early times in my childhood were happy ones indeed. This is where I learned to dream. I often ask myself "Where did that little boy go? Where are his dreams now? Do I have a certain duty to fulfill those dreams, or trust that he will be happy with mine? I know one day I will meet that child, and he will ask what I did with his life, and I will be proud to show him that his life was not in vain, what that little boy gave to me, I cannot repay, nor could I ever try.