Epilogue

Well, you’re finally here, and so am I. If you’ve come this far, you know Jeremy Kidd. You know what he’s thought, what he’s done, what he’s dreamt. You know how he grew up. And you know how he is now.

This Memory Box has been completed during my junior year of high school, my fifth year at Clear Creek Amana, and also my last. Due to the sale of our last Donutland, and a business venture in Cedar Rapids, we have bought a house that we will move into this summer, in Central City; which means that for my senior year, I will not be at Clear Creak Amana. I will not be with my friends, nor will I graduate with the only class I’ve known for five years. This saddens me, however I believe that God has a master plan for each of us, and perhaps my work here is done, or perhaps it was everyone here that was to change me, that they did. If you were to take the seventh grade me, and also as I am today, there would be no comparison. I have grown up here. But if it’s my time to go, I’m willing to accept that.

The relocation to Central City is a weird situation. I went to Central City School in first grade, and then I left, never returned. Until now. It is sort of cool to think about, that I will be ending the same place I started. This move will be easier for me, I think, than for my younger brother and sister. This is because: !. I am a different person than they. 2. I was the one that moved 9 times from pre-school to seventh grade, I’ve kind of got the new kid stuff down. And 3. I think it’s going to be fun. It is going to be a whole lot of fun too. See, that’s the thing, if I want to have fun, if I want to enjoy it, I will. It just seems so cool to me that I will be able to meet all of my friends all over again, and find out who remembers me, and who I vaguely remember.

And when we moved from Central City, we sold our house to my father’s parents, and the one we just bought is a block away, cool huh?

As for Clear Creek Amana, of course I will miss it. I will miss seeing each one of my friends, and even perhaps the not so friendly people too. I’m going to miss taking AP Economics, Civil Criminal Law, Modern Political Problems, AP Lit, and Calculus all at once. I’m going to miss going to Donutland, and showing up to school with a bunch of donuts for whatever class I had that day. Not to mention the sports, drama, speech, though they will all be at my new school, it will not be the same. No, it could never be.

I wish there were a way I could stay. Or perhaps even do both, but there is not. I have learned so much here. I learned how to be a positive, outgoing, fun-to-be- around person. I learned what a true friend is, because I am one, and I have some. The hardest part is going to be saying goodbye. I don’t want to, in fact I’m just sitting here bawling my eyes out right now. I don’t want to lose anyone, everyone means so much to me, and there is no place I’d rather be than where I am now.

The time has been fun, of course it’s had its ups and downs, but it has been fun nonetheless. Maybe that’s why I was always the camera freak that was taking pictures every other day, maybe that’s why I got all my classes except one done that I needed to graduate, maybe, just maybe, I’m supposed to go. This place is my home - it always will be - nothing can change that, nothing.

So I go, but with the knowledge that I will return again someday. I will be back, I just don’t know how or when or how long. I will visit, and I have to keep in touch with everyone. Every time I walk down a hallway or sit in a classroom, I think, how many more times am I going to do this? And now, it’s not very many at all. And I don’t want to forget anyone, leave anyone without saying goodbye. I don’t want to be forgotten. I’ve put too much of myself into this place. There will be days when I will just lay on my bed and think of this place, and I will think and cry, but most of all I will laugh, when I think of all that happened here. And I will know that everything has happened for a purpose; and though we may never find out what that is, I know without a doubt that it exists.

This book is for you guys. All of you that I’m leaving behind. I want you to have it, to read it, to think of me and remember all the good times we shared, and to never, ever forget. This book is me. It contains my life, my thoughts, my feelings, my every day comings and goings, and it was all for you.

It is now, that I must say my final goodbye. Just remember that I will always be thinking of you and that I will never belong anywhere else as much as I belong here, now. I’m sorry to everyone I’ve let down along the way, I never meant to hurt anyone, and I’m sorry I haven’t done all I could have to make every day here the best it could be. But most of all, I’m sorry it couldn’t have been longer. Never forget me, please don’t ever. Because you will all have a really big place in my heart, set aside just for you, and that space will never be filled by anything else. You’ve given me such good times, I hope I have been able to do something for you, I hope that I have had an impact on your lives, I hope that you all are better because you’ve known me.

People important to you, people unimportant to you cross your life, touch it with love and carelessness and move on. There are people that leave you and you breathe a sigh of relief and wonder why you ever came into contact with them. There are people that leave you and you breathe a sigh of remorse and wonder why they had to go away and leave such a gaping hole. Children leave parents; friends leave friends. Acquaintances move on. People change homes. People grow apart. Enemies hate and move on. You think on the many who have moved into your hazy memory. You look at those present and wonder. I believe in God’s master plan in lives. He moves people in and out of each others life, and each leaves his mark on the other. You’ll find you are made of bits and pieces of all who ever touched your life, and you are more because of it, and you would be less if they had not touched you. Pray to God that you accept the bits and pieces in humility and wonder, and never question, and never forget.

bits and pieces.

Friends

I’m sitting here, alone, pondering what has come before, and contemplating the infinite paths I may choose to travel. No one may follow me, and thus I stand alone, but not entirely. You see, I’ve picked up many friends along the way. These will stand with me in joy and sorrow. Nevertheless, I stand alone. For no one knows the life I’ve lived, or the pain I’ve felt. I am there for others, and sometimes they for me, but when it comes right down to it, we are really quite alone. Yet one person who will listen can make all the difference in the world. I am grateful for my friends, for friends they’ll always be. Though some may stay, and others go, these are the only friends I’ll ever know. These friends who loved and inspired and comforted me, I’ll cherish their memories forever, while I hope they still remember me. For yes, I’m strange and set apart. I try each and every day to touch another’s heart. Farewell my friends, since that ye be, and always try to remember, remember me.

Never doubt that it has been fun. Never doubt that I am your friend, and never doubt that I am missing you every minute of every day. This is my last plea, that you never forget what we’ve shared here. That is all I want. Just remember. And know that I am too.