it was raining, and i didn't know why but i was driving home from brendan's house and it hadn;t quite sunk in yet conciously so it was just my subconcious draped in black and so i drove unknowlying down 270 to 40. turning down a shabby road i was scared and wondering just what i was doing and where i was and why i was not still in his driveway when the road deadended into a parking lot. so i parked and stepped out of my car then back in again as i was surprised to find i was at the priory monastery. i decided i had come this far, so i ran over down some steps however the elevenoclock yuppie mass was just ending and so i asked an elderly couple where the entrance was they didn't know, of course. so i walked down to where he had led me out before and i waited in the rain for assistance, which eventualy came in the form of an old father in a plasticcoated golfcart with an english accent.
i asked for brother alban, father lead me inside the fo-yay and asked for my name and if he was expecting me. i stammered and said no, no, he;s not if he;s busy it's fine, i'll just leave if he;s busy but by this time the father had left off in another direction and so i waited quite awkwardly there. i was staring at the other wall when i heard them approach, the father was saying jessica? do you know a jes and nick was saying yes, yes i know who she is, we're friends there, i see her and so i turned around and saw nick approaching me there. i had taken pains to wipe off the remains of yesturday's eyeshadow in the cahr, and i hoped i had succeeded.
nick is twenty years old and has dark hair and tannish skin with wire glasses and is skinny, tallish, i think. he was dressed in his blacks with his white collar-thing but he;'s only a monk so he's not that special.
so we sat down in one of the conferance rooms and he asked me why exactly i had stopped by and if everything was alright. i didn;t cry and said, yes everything was alright i just needed to talk to a male who wouldn;t look at me in that way. but i left out everything but the yes. and so we talk about school and then lord of the rings leading to the history of middle earth. i asked him who his favourite character was and he said gandalf i said that;s brendans! i couldn;t leave him out of the conversations and finally decided to make nick get me a catholic catecism so i could look up the gravity of my sins then we discussed gravity and the world and the mass and galandriel and lifeteen and chairs and bethany. then we looked at a clock and realised that we had been talking for four hours so we left the conferance room and went back into the fo-yay and i noticed it was no longert raining so then i left but not without a copy of nick's old Catecism of the Catholic Church.
i'll have to read it and see if i agree; the only way to further knowledge is though knowledge, you know.
but he’s odd in that we were sitting there and there was this guy, turning twenty-one in just ten days, and he was there in his robe sitting and talking about pendulums with gesticulation and he was far away but yet he looked at me just once in that way, but it was in that way that i saw he was still human and i looked down and blushed red.
when i looked up again he was back to the stoic teacher once removed from soceity.
