DUSTY'S JOURNAL ARCHIVES
I decided to include all my entries, since this is an on-going journal If you have comments or questions about any of the entries, feel free to contact me. I WELCOME your input!
UPDATED week of 5/10/98
Last night, well after dark, my hubby and I stepped out to the back yard to see why our dog was barking. It was so noisy, we could hardly hear each other talking. Frogs from our pond were singing, a bird was chirping in a nearby bush, crickets from every direction joined the chorus. It sounded like a night in a forest! We live in town!
Today, Mother's Day, my family gave me a quiet day for relaxation and contemplation. I invested much of that time on our front porch, which I have lovingly named "Tho'ts Inn." During springtime, I go to Tho'ts Inn frequently.
Today I experienced the shift, the "knowing" that warmer weather is really here. (If you have lived in the Midwest or other areas with severe, cold winters, you know what I mean.)
The warmth, sunshine, birds chirping, seeing the grass and trees in their many shades of green, finding the first iris in bloom, all tell me a newness of life is happening. I am a part of that, too! I am experiencing an enchanting, enriching newness in my life! It is a grande feeling and brings joy bubbling from deep within.
May we all experience the newness of life in every moment!
Any comments? Let Zeke carry me a message!
UPDATED 5/16/98:Several of my natures come to center stage when I am at Tho'ts Inn. Since I am outdoors experiencing Nature while there, several of my natures come to center stage. I named those who are recognizable for easier reference.
Eldena is my elfin nature. She enjoys outdoor nature, especially walks in the woods.
Crystal is my nature who brings Aha's to center stage, enlightenment that leads to expansion and new awakening.
Charlene provides joy bubbles, with an essence of ecstasy.
These three natures pow wow as Awareness observes and Dusty writes.
Quiet time follows as these natures blend and meditate.
This weekend, Awareness became that of remembering and entertaining the inner child. Extended time at Tho'ts Inn, outside of all the necessary ToDo's, allows this to happen.
I let the ever-so-slight breeze brush away the dross, leaving the polished gems of joy, enthusiasm and gratitude to be experienced fully in the moment. A refreshing beginning!
For more info about Dusty's natures and romps with the inner child, request info about her book, DOORS & KEYS, via "Zeke," her email carrier.
After investment of the entire weekend working on another site and then coming back here and "accidentally" punching "advanced editor" for html on my home page, I have been experiencing a less-preferred nature today.
I allowed myself to absorb nearly all my waking hours through the holiday weekend in setting up the new site. It went fine - if I had left it at that. But, no, I had to come over here and try something "new," My brain was too tired, which I realized, after it was too late, and I experienced an unfavorable activity. I know why - I was not taking that precious special quiet time, realigning myself and observing that I needed some mental rest.
As soon as I was willing to take time to go to meditation, I recalled a message I wrote when we lived on the desert, where rainbows are seldom seen:
"May you live all the days of your life." - Jonathan Swift
We can sometimes look back and see a portion of our lives that appear meaningless or wasted. This is not for us to determine. There may have been purpose there that we didn't understand. It is not a thought that we are to dwell upon.
Dolly Parton once said, "The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you gotta put up with the rain."
In contrast, many people find pleasure in the fresh, cleansing rainfall. I see many rainbows where rain is a distance away. We can experience their beauty without getting wet.
We can enjoy living every moment of life.
And that is what I am doing! I am finding joy in communing with my family, with new friends via this site and email - and I am once again taking time at Tho'ts Inn!
The article above is from my booklet, Inspirational Travels, which includes approximately 30 inspirationals and sells for $4.00 (includes shipping and handling).
While sitting out at Tho'ts Inn, basking in a few moments of sunshine, which isn't too easy to do these days, I found myself contemplating the essence of gaining so many new friends via internet in a short span of "time."
I began to realize why it is so easy to visit with others who have sites. We have occasion to study another's heartthrob even before visiting with them directly.
In a way, comparative to ESP, we can know the subconscious of another before physical or verbal contact by their choice of what they share at their site.
This offers occasion to even "chat" on a deeper level. It also gives us someone with whom we can go to immediately with questions.
What a grande way to begin a friendship! We can step right to the depths and discuss the soul concerns, joys and questions about life with one another. Such a delight!
UPDATED 6/12/98
Colorful plants of several shapes and colors, thoughts of strawberries, cat in my lap, stimulating breeze and nearing sunset. My Tho'ts Inn is surely a haven of tranquility.
The breeze is just enough to remind me of sprites dancing on the leaves. Wrens, sparrows, robins, cardinals, doves, blue jays and tree frogs offer the music.
Observing my tho'ts:
My cat - she doesn't catch birds much any more. She used to bring them to the door to show us. Now, she prefers being in the house, sleeping, even when the weather is nice.
Where is that noisy tree frog?
Which kind of bird is giving that call? Oh! Listen to their chatter!
That plant is getting thirsty.
The whir of bicycles as a couple rides by…
A lawn mower in the distance…
A car goes by…
Find the silence!
I close my eyes, let the setting sun's rays dance through the leaves, bringing impressions on my mind…
UPDATED 6/21/98
Summer Solstice! And, as I sit in Tho'ts Inn, I may even have occasion to see the sun set this evening. It has been shining brightly, sending out its loving summer warmth all day.
As Danaan Perry writes in Essene Book of Days, "the time of full outward physical manifestation is here. . . As we experience the warm, full power of the sun, we are called to make true on earth the words of Jesus, 'I and the Father are One.'"
We are one in the Spirit and experience the divinity in everyone we meet., So, dear Friend, 'Namaste!'
I am finding occasion to celebrate my life every day. Join me?
UPDATED 7/2/98
I found another Tho'ts Inn, a comfortable corner at a local café, for when weather is less than favorable.
Have been discussing with new friends, via email, the difference between infinite and finite in communication. Gives opportunity to ponder and meditate on the sameness - where is the fluid that fills the gap to commune in depth and yet chat with those who are not apparently seeking?
I believe many have a desire to seek but don't know how to take *time* to do so. Employment, family needs and personal appointments seem to fill our space.
I discovered this last weekend, while my family visited my parents, that I have been experiencing awake meditation often without conscious awareness. Because of these recent discussions with others concerning finite and infinite, I have been more in awareness of when this is happening.
I now see it happening while I am at work, too; seeing the Oneness of everyone and everything in all situations.
I am also learning how to accept this inner responsibility and let it expand through exercise. I offer a special "Thank You" to my *teachers* who have encouraged me to discover more of what Truth lies within! It is an exciting time!
UPDATED 7/12/98
I've been using an excuse, "overwhelm," with time allotment and number of projects requiring attention this week.
Some of the projects have just been buzzing around in my head, growing in intensity, but getting nowhere.
During my journal time last eve, I listed as many of those projects as I could hear screaming at me. That, at least, quieted them for the time being.
This morning, without looking at my list, I began my day early by "getting started." Even with time-outs for coffee with my hubby, I had six of the projects done within two hours.
Some require more *time* and others have necessary future dates for accomplishment. Seeing them, in perspective, allows me to "just do it" with those that can be done today - and enjoying the process. (I love crossing them off the list as they are completed.)
And, part of the satisfaction comes from actually doing the "chores." They aren't really chores, once I get "into" them - experiencing the Oneness with whatever I'm doing!
It brings delight to immerse in "meditation wide awake" as I go through some of the projects. This happens as I step into my spiritual focus, first mentally and then allow it to expand. It comes easily now when visiting with others, while cleaning the kitchen, even while typing. The brain is still "aware" but there is a second sensation of peace, joy and enthusiasm that pours over me. Even as I write this, I am feeling it!
I am now back with my spiritual nature, Moriah, communicating with friends in delightful communion!
UPDATED 7/18/98
As I sat at Tho'ts Inn today, even with the temperatures reaching mid-90's, it was a delight to be outdoors, capturing the essence of Nature.
It has been a wonderful week! A friend I hadn't seen for nearly 8 years came to visit for a couple of days. She is one of my mentors who continues to stir new thoughts. We had a delightful visit.
Tho'ts went back to a question I asked myself several years ago. As a result of meditative pondering, the following poured forth:
Am I willing to give God within to others? Would I be willing if I were giving every bit of God's love away with nothing left for myself? Could I empty myself completely to give it all to someone else? Could I bear having no Christ left within? Am I capable, in my spirit, to say, "Take it all?"
These are questions I have pondered and, with study, my answers began to reveal themselves.
If I can give all of Christ within away, where do I begin?
Love, God is. Love my neighbor as myself.
Ah, I must first love myself. God is within me and I should love the Godliness within me.
No, I shall love all of me.
How can I judge what is Godliness and what is not?
I can love just me. If I love myself, then I can love others.
What can I do to show I love others?
I don't have to show anything, just love them. God will allow them to see what they are to see. My assignment is just to love them.
Agape is a Greek word meaning spiritual love. We have a special love for our children, another love for relatives and close friends and still another love for our neighbors. These are all only a part of the all-encompassing spiritual agape love between us and our Creator.
God is the only One who can give this type of love. We have inherited God's love and it is a continuous flow, which can never run dry. I am willing to give this Love to others. I give it to you!
UPDATED 7/27/98
Discussions with friends concerning beliefs can offer new opportunities at Tho'ts Inn!
I am discovering openings almost daily where new beliefs have been knocking at the door and I now invite them in to take residence. I also discover, looking around, that some new beliefs have accessorized the room without my previous awareness. Upon opening my eyes, they are already there.
Occasionally, some of my natures question whether some of these new beliefs are welcome. We play games and ask questions to verify if they do belong here.
We observe that our acceptance is much more expansive now. We no longer need to consciously play judge and jury. We accept that some of these beliefs may be temporary visitors to give us occasion to know them better. We can then offer acceptance when they are seen in others. Most, however, feel comfortable at this residence and we offer them a joyful welcome!
UPDATED 8/16/98
This is the view from our back yard patio. I often play with my fanciful imaging here, as a magical place, such as from descriptions in various books by L. M. Montgomery, who also wrote the book, "Anne of Green Gables." I have the images, I just don't take *time* to put them into words.
I have visited several sites in cyberspace that include gardens to explore. One of my favorites is at Princess Gini's Universe. Finding the "treasure" is a delight!
It gives me a time to remember that life is not made of being serious. Laughter, remembering and imaging fun times are still a part of my present life.
Where is enchantment?
Did I leave it with my youth?
Did I pack it away
With childish things?
Why not dig it out and take a peek?
Does it still fit?
I can wear it to the ball!
After note:
It is interesting that right after I came in from Tho'ts Inn, with the ponderings about playfulness, that a group I share with via email on the net were discussing how being more playful, including through our education system, could make this world safer and more fun.
UPDATED 8/22/98
Quiet time has included studying some healthy reminders. Rereading journals from a time when giant leaps of awareness were happening is proving worthwhile . Some reminders had slipped out of site over the years. Those that proved worthwhile in my awakening are with me again.
Autumn is also a time of evaluation. With school starting, it has come to be my season for observing my pilgrimage: where I am today and where I desire to be "tomorrow."
Summer offered a vacation. During this season, I do what I desire when and if I desire. As a result, other awareness reminders lag behind. I am now coaxing them back up the ranks to walk with me: daily regime with meditation, yoga, journaling, personal enrichment book study, intensifying study in an area of creativity I enjoy. . .
My heartthrob is in being a student of Life. When I am studying, I am content.
UPDATED 9/6/98
Refreshing thoughts appear with the incoming season of autumn. It is delightful to be purposefully meditating daily again.
One of my favorite exercises, before going into meditation, is from a book I wrote, "Doors & Keys:"
"Visualize the aspects of your foundation - spiritual, mental, physical, emotional, relationship with family, social and financial - one at a time - before you in a plain outline form of your body. Begin washing across it, as if using an eraser on a blackboard, washing it with golden light. if there are any dark spots, they may need a bit more rubbing.
Do this with each of the last six areas individually and set them aside, still in view, one on top of the other. Then bring the spiritual outline to front and center - it does not need washing - and take the stacked other six and place them into it - they blend and all becomes golden light. It can be a quick rejuvinator or a quick relaxer."
Enjoy the experience of Autumn!
UPDATED 10/8/98
Giggles! I have been journaling more than usual recently - but not here!
Have been playing with some opportunities - a time and a season seem to be applicable - some have provided big opportunities to see beyond; some are still at center stage, so will wait until they have made their bows for formal introduction.
Each opportunity has been tugging to keep my attention on what they are doing. I have been releasing emotional tugs - turning them over to the Director.
Some of the supporting actors and actresses are still hiding in the wings. I do not know the necessary dialogue to coax them to center stage. they will appear when they receive their cue. But, oh, the suspense and the waiting!
In the meantime, am also enjoying the oncoming season.
