Burbank, California; February,2003;
Joan Marques, MBA, Doctoral Student

One of my friends is writing his first novel. Finally. His eloquence with words has always been an indication to me that writing was the right thing for him to do. And I conveyed my opinion about his literary artisticity to an almost exhaustive and aggravating point to him. It is my belief, namely, that no one should waste the abundantly clear talents one has been granted. That will only be a waste toward humanity, and a source of anger to the creator, whoever that may be in your view. So, finally my friend decided to make a start. And what a start!
He gave me a peek at the first draft of what will be his chapter one, and although I am definitely not intending to mow away the grass before his feet--how could I anyhow--I still want to share with you the gist of one particular part in the statements made by my friend, who, as a matter of fact, is normally a convinced cynic, and sometimes even a borderline pessimist.

The essence of the statement was, that if you seriously think about the very process of conception and the subsequent long road of becoming a real small human being, you might conclude that we are all big time winners! Because WE made it, and not all the other billions of sperm that were ejected together with the one that turned out to become us after penetrating a cell, nestling itself, and growing for several months till birth date.

Isn't this point of view a wonderful one, especially on days where nothing seems to be right? Picture this: your car breaks down, it will cost you an arm and a leg to have it fixed, and you just can't afford it at this moment. So you will have to find a solution regarding going to work on Monday. No big deal, because if you were strong, smart, and fortunate enough to make it to birth, you should be unbeatable in dealing with such an incremental setback!

Your partner has left you, because he or she thinks you're a loser. Oh well. Tough! That’s just his or her sorry perception, because you know better. The relationship may just not have been the right match for you both. So wish him or her luck, knowing that both of you are winners by existence. Then get rid of any remorse in your system, and move on!

You've just heard in the hallway that the organization you work for will implement a huge downsizing, and you know that your position is not one they will keep. Well, that's not an easy one, especially if you have dependants. But the realization that you are a winner by birth may be the determining factor to get you through the process of mentally erecting yourself, refusing to take this lay off personal, and immediately starting to look for alternatives.

A mindset is a wonderful thing. It's all about perception: about how you choose to see yourself and the world around you. Too many people slide into a victimized way of thinking because they notice some kind of discrimination against their race, gender, sexual preference, or physical state of being. You know, I'm not saying that the discrimination you may experience is a delusion: There are really a lot of ignorant people out there who actually discriminate. However, that's exactly what they are: ignorant. Their act of discrimination is their problem, not yours. If they want to keep on dreaming that there really are distinctions in superiority between human beings based on skin color, nationality, sex, or skills, they are the ones to bemoan. Not you. For you know that you are a winner without having to proof it through any statistical history or performance exorbitance. They, on the other hand, need a backward, obsolete, and ridiculous mindset to hold on to. How sad for them.

All I'm stating here is that every complex--whether it's a superiority or an inferiority one--is a problem to the ones carrying it, not the ones being looked up against, or down upon. We all went through a similar process of establishing our presence in this world. And that, to me, crowns us all winners, no matter how our lives evolve. We should do everything to maintain our winner’s attitude that got us here in the first place. For that's what will elevate us every time we're down. Every time.